Potty Training Nightmare

I have one of those. Every nap time we clean it up off the girls (I have twins) their beds, their sheets, the walls, etc, etc. We have bought diaper pins and cloth diapers and pinned them over the Huggies. We also have safety pinned their clothes on. (Like the shirt to the pants so they can't get them off.) Or we pin the zipper to the pjs. So far so good. They've stopped for a while and are using the potty more. Let me know if you get any other solutions.

Have you tried putting her in pull ups? Once you start potty training you really need to get them out of diapers otherwise they are very confused as wether they go in their diapers or in their potty.

"Poocaso" ... ha-ha, that is awesome! Hadn't thought of that one.
Our son (he will be 3 on March 31st) went through that same thing (w/o the constipation part) about 4 months ago. He would put his hand in his diaper and paint his crib with poo as well. We solved that by putting him to sleep in onesie jammies that have feetless legs on them.. that way he had no access to the diaper. We eventually figured out that it really had nothing to do with his potty training but that he was ready for a big boy bed. We transitioned him that week and he has been sleeping there ever since and stopped making doo-doo art.. or "doing poo-poo crayon" as he liked to call it :-)
He isnt potty trained yet but we are working on it. I don't have much advice on that subject and don't even think my response has any advice at all.. I just wanted you to know you were not the only mother to a "Poocaso" child :-)
Good luck!

Hi B.,
My son was the same way! I had a friend once who said, You need to take him to a doctor, that is just too wierd! I am glad to hear I am not the only one. I finally began giving him a single M & M everytime he used the potty. It took a long while for him to stop with the poop art. I wish I had thought of your term, "poopcaso"! Anyway, We threw out so many toys and books that he had smeared with feces it was ridiculous. I remember crying and almost throwing up sometimes! Also we used a chart that I made and put gold stars on it. Every time he did it, we screamed and danced and carried on for five minutes. The more over the top we became in celebration, the more he wanted to do it. Anyway, those are the techniques that finally worked for us. Oh, and if it is becoming too much, then take a total break for a week or so. I found that instead of reverting, my son was more inclined to go when he felt like it was his decision. Well, I hope that helps. Do you think the laxatives make it so that she doesn't know when it's coming?

POOCASO is easy to stop. Get duct tape or masking tape and before you put her down, tape her around the back. I know it sounds nutty but it works. They can't get it off, usually and it is an easy fix. If she is artful and gets past it, my friend tried putting her daugher down with any outfit that was unreacheable to undo like her bathingsuit (one piece) that closed in the back. My son took a long time to potty train so I gave up and let him work it out (same for many friends especially of very verbal kids (smart)). After a break we kept encouraging and offering but not pushing.

If you have access to a Natural doctor you might try getting her off the laxatives. There are a lot of options that are natural and will help her mover her bowels without causing them to go to the sloppy mess stage.

B.,

I am going through a similar thing with my son that wil be 3 in February. If I can get him to actually sit on the potty he usually goes, but getting him on the potty is another story. I ask him to go, tell him to go, bribe him with candy and nothing seems to work. He just yells NOOOOOO. I just continue to ask him frequently to go and sometimes he will nd sometimes he won't. I don't want to push too much because the more I push the less he wants to go. We also want to put him in preschool soon, but he refuses to potty train.

I have not personally had an issue with the removing of diapers with poopies in them, but I have a good friend that did. She solved this by putting one piece jammies on her daughter backwards with the zipper in the back. She said she cut the neck a little so it was comfortable for her and she no longer had issues with poopie diapers being removed at naptime. She also said that in the warm months she cut the sleeves and legs off of the one piece jammies so it wasn't too warm.

Good Luck!

L.

I can totally sympathize with you. My twins didn't potty train until they were closer to 4 years old, and I had tried everything. Until they're ready, there's not a lot you can do- they need to make the decision that they want to do it. However, my son did the same (gross) thing with smearing the poop- I put him in blanket sleeper pajamas with the feet cut off, backwards, so he couldn't pull down the zipper. (His twin sister got the zipper down for him until we separated them and put them in different rooms, but that's a different story). That truly works in terms of stopping the "art." I had many tears while cleaning up those messes until I figured out what to do. I hope this helps you out!

I too have (hopefully HAD) a 'poocaso'. She is clearly going to make her own decision on when to potty and give up diapers. She is as strong willed as I am and that is saying something! So, I know of which you speak! When she was taking her diaper off ALL THE TIME, it drove me crazy. I never knew what kind of mess I was going to walk into after a nap and sometimes if she were simply in another room! So I used duck tape. I put it over the tabs of her diaper enough so she could not get an edge and rip that off too, and I would tell her not to touch it. I used a whole role over about a month I'd say, putting one piece over the tabs where the ends of the tape almost touched in the back, naptime and bedtime, and then when I ran out she seemed to be uninterested in it anymore. She still sits on the potty and talks about it so it did not stifle any growth toward being potty trained and it kept me from doing laundry after every time she fell asleep! It sounds extreme, maybe, but it didn't hurt her, it was never on her skin, just the diaper, and it make it so she couldn't take it off herself. So far so good for us! Good luck!

Hi B. -

You are right, there is alot going on for all these issues to be appearing at once. Since I don't know what your beliefs are, I'm just going to share. On a holistic level, constipation is about holding in and refusing to let go. Beware of the continued use of laxatives, they "force" the body to release when it is not ready. There are natual alteratives that do not disturb the body's natural rhythm - like Chlorella or Spirulina - both blue-green algae. Increasing the amount of dark leafy greens your daughter eats will also help with this. Night time terrors are generated because the child is unable to express themselves during the day and so their fear comes out at night when they have less control. They usually manifest when a child is afraid to express a fear of change. You might want to examine what's going on - especially around changes in your household. Since children are not able to vocally express their confusion or inability to understand, these "questions" often show up in bodily ailments. A little Chamomile tea before bed and an essential oil burner or candle in Lavender should help.

Best of luck,
M. M. Ernsberger
Mind-Body Therapist
Children & Family Coach
Certified Herbalist

I was a poop painter myself and although it made my mother crazy she never punished me for it,,,,she just cleaned it up and I stopped....I am very strong willed also and have owned my own business and have been very successful....she'll outgrow it and all kids go to potty when they are ready too..period...

My son is also almost 3 and i want to make sure he is potty trained in time for preschool. I started letting him run around naked on the bottom then with just pants - no underwear or diapers. At first there were accidents and now he is getting much better. Watch closely for signs of needing to poop and take her to the potty, bring a book and hold her hands. If you know she hasn't pooped in awile and seems to be straings. I warm bath helps, but be ready to pull her out and put her on the potty. I let my son watch potty videos and offer prizes for potty training. Don't make a big deal if accidents happen, make sure she knows sh'e not in trouble. Make a huge deal when she succeeds. Also don't worry, i think we feel presure because of preschool, but we should be letting them take their time if needed. I don't know what to say about the poop pictures except if she usually poops during nap time maybe move up nap time a little and try to get her to sit on the potty for awhile each day at that time instead. My doctor suggested sitting on the potty and hanging out reading a book a couple times a day at the same times each day. Even if they don't go they get used to sitting on the potty. Hope this helps. Regarding laxatives, in my opinion they should only be used for short term solutions. used long term they train your colon to "need" them... if i were you i'd look for a more natural approach. Be aware though, that some "natural" laxatives also cause the same effect. I would consult a naturalpathe or health supplement specialist about aloe vera juice ( not to be confused with topical gel) prune juice or something else like that.

Well, I don't have much advice for potty-training (my son is only 6 mos.). What struck me about your cry out for help is your daughter's chronic constipation problem. I myself am a RN and my hubbie a chiropractor. I therefore know the downsides to chronic laxative use, as well as how chiropractic care (the right techniques in chiropractic-there are many) for her could very likely change both of your lives, for the MUCH BETTER!!! Let me know if you are interested and I'll give you more information-hey, what have you got to lose!

Don't push her. If she isn't ready then leave it alone. If the preschool has a policy of a child being potty trained at 3, find a different facility. About the poocaso, put a onesie or something secure that she won't be able to take off easily at night and nap. My friend kept pushing her 3, then 4, then 5 year old to get trained. The younger brother was trained at 3 and the older one refused. He wanted the attention that he wasn't getting otherwise. He was 7 before they figured it out. Your daughter is saying that she needs your attention in other areas and she will follow suit by train herself when she gets your attention somewhere else.

Just thought I'd let you know your not alone my son has been constipated ever since I can remember , he will be 3 in less than a month and were not having lots of success with potty training either. I never put my son on any meds for constipation though and he still has big hard poops but it doesnt seem to bother him or cause any pain at all

Kids will not be potty trained until they are developmentally ready. It's like a "door" inside of them. They won't be trained until the door opens. Your situation is not abnormal, so take heart, and try to stay emotionally "out of it" as best you can.
Many people have the idea that constipation during potty training is a control issue by the child. (this idea doesn't rule out that their truly can be a physiological problem, but they are rare). The more strong-willed the child, the more their need to be in control of their world, i.e., not pooping like mommy so frantically wants them to do. What they can control at this age is limited; refusing to poop is something they can.
Bring your child into the bathroom with you and let her see "how big girls" do it. This will appeal to her need to be "grown up". It also lets you start teaching her about good hygiene. (Fathers should do this with sons as well). Give a small reward for each success, like an M&M, but her real reward should be you pointing out her success at becoming more grown up.
Your daughter doesn't need laxatives and I'm sorry you received this advice. Talk to a dietician or research toddler diets on-line. There is tons of information, and you will find what fits her needs. I'm also an RN and know very well the down-side of laxative dependancy.
Staying out of it emotionally is vital. A reaction from the parent is bread and butter for the strong willed child. Love her patiently through this and be consistent. All of my children were not completely potty trained until 3 y/o, and I could not have cared less! I just never made it an issue. Don't let the super moms who have their kids trained by a year old (yeah, right!) get you down. The age is as varied as the kids are.
If you do stop the laxatives, be sure to do it with your pediatricians guidance, so you will be aware of any signs/symptoms your child may exhibit as her body adjusts itself to becoming laxative free.

Ok - this sounds really bad but it worked for us. Our daughter was using the potty for peeing but not pooping. She knew what to do and how to do it but just refused. She also is extremely strong willed. We gave her a dead line as to when the diapers were going away. Then when the diapers went away, she pooped in her pants - decided she didn't like that so started pooping on the floor. My husband was home when she did it one day and made HER clean it up with supervision. The third time that she had to clean it up was the last time she ever refused the potty and has not had a bowel accident in over a year. Hope this helps. Good Luck!!

My 23 month old has gotten into her poopy diapers at nap time as well...and it even looked like she tried to taste the poop once. She recently had the stomach flu and had thrown up for the 1st time. She hated throwing up and she talks about how she "threw up all over". Now if I think that she is going to put something in her mouth that might make her sick, I tell her that if she puts it in her mouth that it might make her throw up. I ask her if she wants to throw up and she usually says no and doesn't put whatever filthy thing she was planning to put in her mouth. I don't know if it would work with your daughter as every child is different but maybe you could try the approach of talking to her about how touching poop is dirty and can make her really sick.

My son is a lot like your daughter. He has the same medical issue and has been on Miralax for over 2 years.He also did the same Poocaso (love that by the way!) Try pull ups. They're a little harder for them to get off. My little guy wanted nothing to do with potty training until I let him pick out sticker to decorate his training potty. He LOVES Buzz Lightyear so now it is his Buzz potty and he goes no problem. He made it his and asks to use it even when he doesn't need to just so he can sit on it! Good luck.

Well my daughter actually did that would take her diaper off and play with her poop! Oh it was horrible! Except she was easy to potty train and was done by 2 1/2. That was one reason I wanted her trained so bad. Now constipation I have experienced with my son and let me tell you its difficult to get them trained!! My son was almost 4 when we finally got the training done for poop. He doesn't sound like he was as badly constipated as her though. I have to tell you the best thing to help with both my kids were taking the diapers/pull ups away. With my son who was my hard one I just started with underware at home and at night and when we went out he still wore them. He had pee down by age 3. Is she peeing on potty or no? Not sure if I was helpful at all but I feel your pain. My son constipation has been a on going battle and I really feel for him!