So I asked a couple months ago about potty training my 2 year old (he will be 3 in April) and got the answers I knew: He just wasn't ready yet. We stopped worrying about it, until last week when he started saying he wants to wear big boy underwear and that diapers are for babies. So I put him in underwear Monday, and he had 5 or 6 accidents that day. I'm not surprised, he'd never been in them before and probably was just feeling them out. The rest of the week, I would have him go try to use the potty every 2 hours or so, and he stayed dry most days. My problem is that he doesn't ask to go, if I don't remind him frequently enough he will have an accident. After thinking about it a bit, I was wondering if by taking him to go he is not ever getting the sensation of a full bladder, and thus not feeling like he "needs" to go. So today and yesterday I stopped taking him and started just asking if he needed to go (he generally says no). This morning he was grabbing himself and doing the potty dance but he still said no, I suggested he try anyways and he ran to the potty and went without an argument. He won't ask to go, but will start to pee, then stop and run to the potty to finish. Is this the normal progression of things or is he still not ready? As far as poos go, he is very regular so I've just had him sit after he eats and he will go. Should I stop having him sit and see if he requests to go on his own or keep having him try? I don't want to put him in pull-ups, I've tried that at naptime and he thinks they are swim diapers and will pee in them every time. He wants the real underwear! I'm kind of at a loss, since it's been cold we haven't gone much of anywhere this week, but I'm very hesitant to take him out and risk an accident since he's not telling me he ever needs to go, but I really don't want to switch back and forth between diapers and underwear (and I know he'd be unhappy at the prospect of diapering again). He's supposed to go back to his one day nursery school on Tuesday and I know they can't take him every couple hours like I have been.
Thanks for the input everyone. I feel like he is making progress, since he is stopping himself and going to finish or holding it long enough that I can see he needs to go and then am able to remind him. I just really wasn't sure when he was supposed to be telling me he needed or wanted to go. Gamma G, I think you missed some of my post. If he were peeing/pooing on my couch I would know he wasn't progressing and wouldn't have been asking. As it is, he is staying dry or only going a little bit in his undies before finishing on the potty, so cleanup hasn't been an issue. I personally think Pull-ups are just a ploy for the diaper companies to make more, he thinks of them as diapers as the only difference is how they stay up so we won't be using those. His nursery school is 9-3 so he will definitely have to go while there, I will talk to them when I take him back Tuesday. There are only 5 kids and 2 teachers. Two kids are potty trained and three are not, there is a child sized bathroom in their room, so they are equipped for both diapers and bathroom trips. Thank you all for the feedback, this is a new realm for me and it's good to hear from those who have been there and done that!
I am in the same boat! My son is almost 4 now, but he did the same when he was pee training. He STILL leaks sometimes and then runs to the bathroom. You are doing a great job with him. I have that fear about taking him out and he will pee or poop his pants still lol. I guess it never goes away. Little kids pee their pants. I remember doing it when I was a little girl.
Telling you he needs to go is a very late development. My son trained in under a week at 25 months. Meaning - he went went we took him to the bathroom (after meals, after waking and if it seemed like he needed to go), wore underwear without accidents at home and daycare but needed assistance with wiping and dressing. He did not start announcing he needed to go for another 18 months or so and did not start heading off to the bathroom himself until he was 4-1/2 or so. If I had it to do over, would I wait until he was 3-1/2 to 4-1/2 because then he might tell me and go off to the bathroom himself. No way in h*ll. We kept 1-/2 years of diapers out of landfills (aside from the wonderful fact that flushing the toilet is just so much more pleasant than changing diapers). You are doing fine.
When they learn to walk, we are happy when they toddle across flat floors and pick themselves up when they fall. We don't expect them to cross the balance beam right away. Same thing.
ETA - My son's daycare absolutely expected to clean up the toddlers who were in the middle of training. My son was pretty much trained after a long weekend at home, but they worked with LOTS of kids who took longer. Nothing you are saying in your post looks like a sign he is not ready. Best of luck.
In the beginning you just take him, frequently. It's no different than training a puppy. I never asked my kids if they needed to go, I just took them, and they would try. Doing this every 30 to 60 minutes or so, and then stretching it out to every 90 minutes to two hours and it only took a few weeks. This is exactly how they did it in the two's class at our preschool and it worked great. Some people may say oh they're not really fully trained until they can go without you taking them but who cares? I'd rather keep my kids in clean panties than in soiled diapers anyday, especially with a baby to change all the time.
If he wants underwear, absolutely go for it. It sounds like he is making progress. Taking them on a schedule is pretty common when they are first learning. True, they don't get the sensation of a full bladder but they do get used to using the toilet and not wetting their parents.
Talk to the preschool about it. Tell them your son is eager to train and that you're working very hard at home. Most schools are actually able to help keep kids on track.
Just wanted to comment about the nursery school on Tuesday. Yes, they can/should take him every couple of hours. They should be accustomed to doing this if they work with toddlers! Our day school did this, everyone potty trained at the same time so they had a system...
Saying that they have to "go" is a late development in the toileting process. They may not tell you that they have to go, and it's too early in the process for it to be an option for him. School will need to take him to the bathroom on a regular schedule, and they should know what a kid who has to go looks like. Ask him how often they can take him. Tell him that when his teachers tell him that he needs to use the bathroom, that he has to listen to them. Use multi layered cloth trainers with plastic pants over them to send him to school. You are right to avoid the pullups. Good luck!
That he's starting to go in his pants, then running to the bathroom to finish sounds like progress. I think you should stay the course, and keep him in underwear. Make sure his bed has a waterproof mattress pad and/or a plastic layer under the sheets. You'll have to do a lot of changing for awhile, but it's better than regressing. Once you make the decision, you have to go with it.
As for nursery school, just give him tons and tons of verbal reminders about making sure he goes potty at school, has to have dry pants at school etc... Try to make sure he goes right before you take him, and maybe he won't even need to go again. My 4 yr old goes every morning before preschool, and I don't think he's ever used the bathroom at school. He's there for 2.5 hours 3x per week. Try not to give him a lot to drink in the morning on that day. Just a few sips of juice or water would be good.
He'll get this! Good luck!
1. once you start seriously potty training the child wears cotton undies all day every day.. diapers ro pullups at night or naps fine.. but if the child is awake they are in undies. do not go back and forth.. either he is training wearing undies.. or he is not training and wearing diapers..(pull ups are a waste of money)
2.. when a child is just starting.. you the parent are trained.. you take him potty every hour.. do not ask.. .. take him every hour on the hour.. if he is successfully dry with one hour potty trips.. try 90 minutes.. the child will not be able to identify the sensation .. I have to go.. and then stop their playtime. and get to the potty.. YOU are responsible .. gradually over time you increase the time between potty trips.. but you keep taking him on a regular basis.. Until he is able to identify the have to go feeling.. and stop his play and go the bathroom without accidents..It might take a month or longer.. some kids take a year.. that you have to remind them to go.. for several years you will remind them to go potty before you leave home before bedtime.. ..
you should keep taking him to the potty on a regular schedule for a long long time..
He is definitely headed in the right direction. I think,if you put him,in underwear for,school, he may just surprise you. Also talk to the teachers. They are very familiar with this. Kudos. You are,almost there.
He's gotten the message that diapers are for babies - and now he's throwing it back in your face. Diapers are for toddlers who aren't using the potty regularly. Tell him that he gets the underwear when he's dry for 3 days (not counting the nights). Or put the underwear over the diapers or pull ups. You say he thinks the pull ups are swim diapers and he pees in them every time - but you also say he doesn't know when he has to go! So, can he control it or not? I'd say, not yet, not reliably.
The advantage to pull ups is that he CAN pull them down when he's doing the potty dance if he gets to the toilet in time. I'd try to re-educate him about diapers, pull ups, babies, and 2 year olds. Tell him he's heard things that aren't true. Show him kids who do different things at different ages - early walkers, early talkers, early potty-ers. Then put him back in the pull ups and put away the underwear for his birthday! I think it's tough to go back on what he's already got in his mind but you've got to do something besides changes his clothes 6 times a day. He's 2. He doesn't get to decide when it's time for underwear - his body gets to decide that.
So, you've let him make a grown up decision. The school is not going to spend the day redressing him in dry clothes. You have to make the decision to put him in pull ups if you don't like that he sits on the couch and pees or poops. If you don't want to clean those things every few hours then you have to take him.
These are all signs he's not ready. If he was ready he'd recognize he needs to hold it. He'd be holding it already too not just when he's in underwear.
Talk to the school and find out their policy on potty training. I didn't even have a bathroom in my 2 year old room. We started training kiddos at age 3. The parents had usually started them at home but I was not going to pay staff to spend their entire day changing pee and pooh clothes. In the 2 year old classroom they did pre-school work and if kiddo asked to go pee they took them.
