I have a 20 Month old little girl who has started crying when she goes to the bathroom in her diaper. Sometimes she will go to the potty and others she just stands at it and cries. If you leave the bathroom all together she cries and keeps saying "Pee Pee" because she does not want to go in her diaper either. I am so confused, my parents say don't press the issue she will go when she is ready which I understand, but my thing is she is holding it until she is just busting because she does not want to use neither the potty nor the diaper. I do not want her to get a bladder infection just because she is hard headed and will not go. Please if you have any ideas I am open to any!! P.S. We do the "get all excited" when she does go in the potty and she does too, but that has not helped either.
Hi J.,
My daughter is now five, but what I did with her worked great. I put a gumball machine (like the kind you find a Wal-Mart) on the bathroom counter. I know that seems like an odd place for a gum ball machine, but hey...it worked! We filled it full of jelly beans and everytime she went potty, she got to put in a quarter and get a few jelly beans. She loved it
and it worked wonders for us!!
Good luck!
Poor thing! I haven't read other responses, so forgive me if this has already been mentioned. What I did with my first two boys were buy lots of hot wheel cars and every time they went, they got to pick one from the bag. Yes, every time they went potty. I know that they have those little soft baby dolls at Wal Mart for 97cents. That's real excitement to some kids. I'm about to go through this with my 2yo girl. Anyway, I'd probably do that and if that doesn't work, try stickers on a piece of paper or posterboard taped to the wall of the bathroom. Every time she goes she gets to put a sticker of her choice on the paper anywhere.
We are trying to do this now too, so I don't have lots of advice. But one thing I've tried is putting the little potty in the living room and telling him he can watch his video or play with his puzzle as long as he is sitting on the potty. That has gotten him to sit there for a long time, (but he still does not put in the pee pee). It sounds like she may be scared of the potty. Are you using the big one or a little one? Maybe try the other option. They make lots of seats you can put on the big one to make her more comfortable. The only thing I haven't figured out is if you skip straight to the big one, how is she supposed to get up there by herself without falling in?
:-) Anyway, good luck!
If you already ruled out a UTI, I think she might have a little potty anxiety. When us adults get a little too excited about their progress it can put too much pressure on some kids to do it just right. We have a little padded Dora seat that goes on the big toilet but we just recently put a short potty chair in the living room. Within a week she started taking off her wet diaper and pretend pottying on the chair when I wasn't prompting her. Maybe putting a potty seat in a more family local area (living room, play room, or kitchen) will make it more relaxed. Try not to make a big deal. Just say over and over "If you feel like you have to go just go sit on the potty." Then walk away and do your daily activity. I feel it's normal for them to be a little upset, it's a big change. I think some tots are perfectionists; they don't want to do it if they can't live up to the adult standard. Let us know what works when you find out.
I haven't gone through this...and maybe someone has already said it, but could she be having muscle contractions or something... and it actually hurts to go?
Some things we used while potty training included books- like the Elmo Potty Book and a few others. I bought my daughter cute panties with characters that she liked and scented soap to wash with afterwards. We also used skittles or smarties. Eac time she went to thte potty and used it she got 2. At one point she was just going to sit and try many times a day! Your daughter will go when she is ready and who knows what is going through her little ming about this new situation.
I would take her to the DR. She might have an infection and it hurts that's why she dosnt want to go.
I agree -- make sure there's not a UTI already.
With our daughter, silly as it seems, we had a couple of kiddy potties: one in the bathroom and one in the common front area of the house. (One of the hurdles was getting her to leave whatever she was doing to use the potty and the location helped.)
At 20 months, she's getting close. Videos, praise, treats, you got good advice from a lot of mommies here. Good luck!
Is the seat on your potty chair removable? If not get the little seat you can set on top of your regular toilet seat. Hayden thinks his potty chair is like his other little chairs, he plays with it more than using it and He tries to empty it himself when he does use it. YUK!!!! But he thinks he is a big boy when i set him on the tiolet.
I was in your exact same position until about a month ago. She would hold it until it hurts, but in our case would scream if going near the bathroom. Very, Very stubborn! Then (around 27 mos.) one day she started taking her diaper off by herself after she wet in them. I decided if you can do that -you're ready! We went to Wal-Mart and I explained to her that she is a "big kid" now and that meant no more diapers, she picked out her own underwear with the explanation of "now you have to go in the potty chair." We came home and watched Potty Power (which I highly recommend). We watched it all day( at her desire) -and she actualy willing went and got on the potty chair. We used a reward system also (little 50 cent to 1 dollar toys) just for a few days until the idea of going really sunk in. Go cold turkey on the diapers when she's awake. It is completely in your court to be vigilant and watch her body motions to see when she needs to go and then RUN for the bathroom. She already knew the "feeling" so it was a mattter of getting to the bathroom in time, but within a couple of days she was telling us and running herself. There is a small amount of truth to "they will do it when they are ready", but I think providing the right situation points them in the right direction.
Have you tried any of the cute potty videos? The Elmo one is cute, and there is the "Once Upon a Potty" among others. Both my older son, who is trained, and my younger son, who has autism and in the process right now, enjoyed the videos and responded well to them. Right now, my younger one will strip off his wet pants saying "uh-oh, all wet", allow me to sit him on the potty (which he would absolutely not do before) and then wash his hands and ask for new pants. I hope we both have some good luck while it is still summer!
You are the first person that I have heard that had the same issue as my son.....not wanting to go in the potty and not wanting to go in his underwear. We just didn the potty training thing at the end of May and I can say we are 100% trained now. I would sugggest going to the store and picking out some underwear and then pick a week when you don't have anything to do. We just put my son in his underwear and rewarded him when he did go. We tried to keep it fun but there were times when I knew he could not hold it anymore and I would literally force him to the toliet. I know that sounds bad but it worked. The first few days were rough but it kept getting better and by a week we were pretty good. We still reward him when he asked but his reward has changed from candy to getting to watch 3 minutes of a dvd or a small piece of granola bar. Your reward will have to be something that she doesn't usually get. Hope this helps slightly and good luck.
I'd take her to the DR and make sure she doesn't have a UTI already. I've never heard of a child crying all the time about going pee either in their diaper on on the potty. Better to be safe than sorry on this. And if she doesn't have anything, the DR should be albe to give you some pottying advice to help her to pee instead of holding it.
Good luck!
S.
Hi J.!
I have an 18 month old little girl who is starting to get interested in using the potty so we bought her her own potty. I was wondering...do you have a training potty? Perhaps she's a bit intimidated by the big potty. If you have a training potty you can put it in any room. I know this might sound really strange, but one of my girlfriends was telling me there were just certain rooms that her kids were more comfortable in to use the potty when they were first starting to potty train. She may feel more comfortable starting out in a room that she is comfortable in and then you can gradually move the potty into the bathroom and then transition to the big potty. It may help it may not, but it may be worth a try to avoid a bladder infection. I hope this helps and I hope you have much success with your little girl.
J.
I'm not sure about how to handle this since mine isn't ready yet to potty train. She's showing no interest. BUT....my girlfriend swears by the Elmo potty book. Her son loved it and it may relax your daughter enought to see on the potty and pee if she and you read the book. Go get it and try and see if it works. But she could have an infections which would make it hurt if she pees so she's struggling. Check that out first, THEN go get the book! Good luck!
J. W:
A 20 month old is too young for trying to potty-train. You need to try potty-training her when she between three and four years old. Back off the potty-training until she is three.
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Are you sure she doesn't already have an infection? It may hurt her when she goes.
My son wanted nothing to do with potty training. I read the book "potty training in one day" it worked he was completely potty trained in 1 day. Check it out.
J.,
Get a large box and let your little girl help you decorate it with wrapping paper, bows, stickers, glitter, etc. Then, fill it full of Dollar Store toys and tell her that every time she goes potty on the big girl potty without crying, she gets to pick out a toy. You can also put suckers, stickers, crayons, or pretty much anything she likes in the box.
It'll work... If it doesn't consider having her checked for a bladder infection, yeast infection, or anything else that might make her burn when she used the bathroom.
Hey J., I did potty training for my little girl recently. If she doesn't already have an infection, you might want to find the right pressure of water in the tub that sounds like someone peeing. It helped us sometimes after sitting on the toilet for about five minutes. Is she on a potty or a potty seat over the big toilet. Mine wouldn't sit on a potty. It was like another one of her chairs. I don't know if wal-mart still has them or not but at the time of our potty training we bought a Disney's princess chest that opened up with compartments for diapers inside. The inside of the lid was a chart to track the progress. We literally have 1000s of stickers all over it!!!! Yes, she would just want to put stickers on it but I let her know that if she wants to put more on it, she has to go potty like a big girl. Now the box chest is in her room and she keeps her mini ponies and princess doll house furniture in it. Good Luck!
