Preparing Toddler Boys for Birth of Baby Sister

get them a baby doll of their own and show them how to take care of it. Reading books about babies is also good and pointing out other babies you see. Spend a lot of time with them and tell them how much you love them and how special they are to you. Make them feel important and make them feel like they are going to be big helpers and you will really "need their help". It's good to get them a book or a toy or special present that they can open when the baby is born. I've seen people do this when the baby gets presents. Some kids are fine without all of that but it is important that they get a lot of attention and some special time once the baby comes. Also if they feel like they are part of it, then they will be less resentful. They may regress and act out and that's ok. Just praise the good and ignore the bad as much as possible.

Explain to them beforehand, what a baby is.
For example (I did this with my daughter, who was 3 almost 4, when I had my 2nd child. ):
-a baby cries/wakes/I nurse her
- babies cry a lot because they cannot talk yet, like you can
- Mommy nurses her
- I will wake up to take care of her at night. You don't have to wake up. ONLY Mommy
- Daddy will help you too
- babies are very delicate, need to be gentle (practice with a doll)
- every month a baby changes. I'd explain to my daughter how. Motor-skills, cognition, etc.

I explained to my daughter, BEFORE I had the baby, what will happen and when her baby brother came home from the hospital.

I napped, with my daughter when I was pregnant. Explaining: Mommy needs to take care of her tummy, I will get tired the bigger my tummy gets etc. She understood like a champ.
I made my pregnancy about prepping her. It was not 'my' pregnancy... but my time to prep my daughter about it and for when baby brother came home.
My daughter adjusted very well. She knew what to expect. She knew how I was still there for her, even with another baby. Because I explained everything to her, before, I brought home my 2nd child.
And once home, I spent a ton of time, talking with her and explaining everything to her. Or any questions she had. Thus, she 'knew' what a baby was, how they are, what they do, and why. And what Mommy does. Too. And how, she is, "always my first baby." I incorporated her into everything, with me. For as much as she could understand for her age and her maturity. I spent my whole pregnancy, prepping my daughter about it. Even going with me to my prenatal appointments, which my Doc encouraged and he taught her how to use the Doppler heart monitor on my tummy. And of course, took tons of photos with her and my growing tummy, each month. She'd sing and talk to my tummy too, her baby brother in my tummy. She already bonded with him, before he was born.

Several have mentioned the book "siblings without rivalry" on here, so i finally bought it. OH MY!! I'm still at the beginning (maybe pg 50), but it's such an eye opener! It will DEFINITELY help you in knowing how to deal with your children if they act out a little more or hurt her or cry or get moody, etc. They tell you how to listen and hear them and let them express themselves in a way that encourages better behavior as well as a closer bond.

It actually teaches what I believe to be great communication skills for everyone. I highly, highly, highly recommend this book. It is awesome. It's already transforming how I respond. It was nice to know I was doing a lot of it right, but it helps me understand it so much better. So...anyway, for sure get that book!

Be sure baby sister arrives with a present for each big brother!! We did this when #2 was born and it worked wonders and we are doing it again in a couple of weeks when #3 is born!

You've gotten great responses. I was a nanny for triplets who were 23 months when their sister was born. They each received a gift from the BABY when they visited her in the hospital the first time. The gifts were a little personalized lunchbox-style bags with a small coloring book, new crayons, stickers, lollipop, etc (each chosen carefully for each child based on their particular likes).

My kids were all close. I found what worked best for us was they knew a
new baby was coming but I did not make a big deal about it every day. I
think they just thought "oh Mom is away, that means a new baby." LOL.
No one ever had a problem. My feeling is at this age if you talk about it con-
stantly by the time the baby arrives they have had it. Just my opinion.

Congrats on the new baby. Check to see if your local hospital offers "Big Brother and Sister Classes, where they can learn how to feed and diaper a baby. The talk about the arrival of the new baby. In my daughter's class they made the baby a picture and wrote a letter. At the end of the class they got a certificate and a T-shirt that said, I'm a big Sister, or I'm a big brother. It helps get them ready and you can ask the instructor questions as well.

The Happiest Toddler on The Block has some good suggestions:

Let your boys overhear you gossiping to the baby in your tummy (and after the birth) "psst baby, I can't wait until (name) shows you how to stack blocks (or whatever). He does it so good"

They have patience-stretching and magic breathing that teaches them anger management stuff for when the baby comes.

It says to avoid big changes 3 months before the due date and 6 months after the baby is born... they start feeling betrayed by you and the baby and may blame it on the baby.. My mom made that mistake when she rushed my older brother to potty train right before I was born and he was really mean to me until I was 6 (push me off of chairs, slam the car door on my hand, kick an ant hill on me) *sigh* although she still left me alone with him all the time for some reason regardless...anyways...

Buy a great toy that the new baby will "give" to his/her older brother/sister

Great little book, it's on pg 247. Maybe your library has it?

Congrats on the new daughter! I'm sure she'll love having two older brothers ; )

Include them in celebrating the preparations for her arrival, if you have a hospital birth allow them to see her as soon as possible, have a gift, or a few small gifts for each of them when you come home (baby sister will be receiving gifts and they may feel left out and resentful) and enlist their help in caring for her. They can bring diapers to you, sing and talk softly to her, or whatever small tasks you have for them. Explain that she is little right now, and needs their help, and that they'll have lots of fun with her as she grows up.

Keep them nearby as you nurse or bottle feed her and generally tend to her, try not to shoo them away, And, make some time for them once she arrives, to read stories, watch a favorite TV show or DVD, play a game, whatever they enjoy doing with you. They need to know that Mom & Dad still love them as well as their new sister.

God bless you all<3