How do you treat your children when they are ill? My daughter is usually pretty healthy, so thank goodness! But she has a cold, poor thing, and wasn't feeling well today.
She stayed home today in her PJs and she layed on our couch and watched TV, played on her computer (for an hour only because that's her daily limit) and drew pictures and read books. I made her homemade chicken noodle soup and she got to eat it in the living room on the couch. I made sure she had everything she needed, read books with her and we did colored together. I brought her snacks and hot tea all day.
My husband thought I was being harsh because I limited her computer time to one hour, which is her normal daily limit. He also wanted her to be able to watch TV in her bed after her bedtime to fall asleep. We NEVER allow her to watch TV after he bedtime to fall asleep because she doesn't sleep, she just watches the TV until you go in and shut it off or it goes off by sleep timer. I don't have a problem with her watching TV up UNTIL her bedtime, but it goes off when it's "lights out."
Was I being hard on her? I don't think I should bend the rules too much when she's sick or else I'm afraid she'll start getting "headaches" and "bellyaches" and want to watch TV or get extra computer time. I know she was genuinely sick today, but she does like to get a bellyache when it's time to do chores, which would magically disappear if we were to suddenly have playtime. She also asks and asks and ASKS for things she knows she can't have (until I have to tell her that if she asks one more time I'm going to cut out the privilege forever) and we've just gotten her to the point where she won't throw a fit or beg for more computer time when her timer is up.
My husband did see my point and went along with it.
Do you give your children extra privileges when they are sick?
when kids are sick, they need rest. watching tv after bed time isn't rest - playing on the computer isn't either - I'm with you. those rules stay in place.
If my kids are home ice then they are in bed. They get to take the portable DVD player in the bedroom, some coloring books, a few toys, etc but I don't want anyone that I sick in common areas of the home. Hubby is on his second day home sick from work he is also confined to the bedroom. Keeping them in their rooms helps keep whatever illness they have from spreading through the entire home.
some extra privleges yes - like laying around in pj's all day, vegging on the couch and eating in the livingroom...yes! but i agree with you. if she is "sick" she doesn't need to be playing on the computer too much, and she sure doesn't need to be staying up late watching tv. computer time could give her a headache, and staying up late - of course, she needs MORE sleep, not less. i think you are right on.
I see your husbands point of view but Im sticking with Mom :)
If she was seriously ill and was bound to the bed/couch it would be different. For a cold, fever etc. I say stick to the rules.
I think you handled it very well. You gave her a few more "feel better" priviledges, but didn't bend your "rules" and send a mixed message.
My little guy is still very young (almost 3), but will take a mile if you give him an inch after being sick! He just finished-up a round of fever/double ear infection/ URI. During that time, he was allowed to watch more t.v./movies than usual, but not all day long. He was allowed to fall asleep on us in the living room rather than going to bed at his "set time". Little things that were more about "comfort and lack of energy" than "sick kid priviledges".
I think you were being too easy on her lol
If mine are sick they have to stay in bed. cause after all sleep is what helps them get better.
They can read books and we have a portable TV and DVD player to watch movies , They are allowed to watch one movie then rest or read. But they have to rest or read for as long as the movie was. then they can watch another one.
No computer time , no video games .
They can do workbooks or read if they are feeling good enough to do computer or video games.
They are home from school sick then they will do things that help them get better or they will learn.
I guess most would call me too strict but I don't want any faking , they do not have a good time when they are homesick , it's not what being home sick is for, its for doing things that will get them well the fastest
No extra privileges. LOTS of extra snuggles!! My son gets plenty of doting on when sick, like you did with the tea and chicken noodle soup and such.
we don't give our kids many extra privileges when they are sick. the oldest does tend to get a bit more tim on the xbox while he's laying down (he is 7). the youngest (2) gets to have her cuppy in the living room while watching tv, and lots of extra snuggles. i take the day off of housework when she is sick, cause she can't make it to the bathroom to throw up just yet, and it still freaks her out. the middle child doesn't get sick often, but he is only just turning four, so his extra's are about the same as the youngest. and all three of them get to watch tv all day when someone is sick. they often don't, and will go play in their room, but the option is there when they are sick.
When my kids are sick (which they rarely are) they know that means they can lay in the bed and watch TV only. There is no computer, video games, etc. When the other kids get home from school, they cannot pop up all better then either. Parents who allow there kids to have a fun day when they are missing school, breed a lifetime of bad habits.
It sounds like you did great with your daughter. Perhaps your husband wanted a chance to baby her a bit, too. I assume he was away all day while you were caring for your daughter. We never allow tv in the bedroom (not even ours). It is so bad for you, it won't aid in her healing as she should have complete darkness in order for her body to function properly when sleeping. It is a bad habit to form to have a tv on in bed. But, if your husband didn't agree with you after the conversation (which you said he did), I would suggest going along with his wishes because 1. it was for one day, and 2. building that bond in your marriage is vitally important. Hope she's feeling better soon! I have all 6 of mine sick right now, which is so unusual for us! They are on the mend though. And, we are having special treats that they normally don't get (like tv!).
yes-but I make it known that I am doing it because they are sick-and I love them very much and want to take care of them so they recover sooner.
You are right. Do not waver.
I think you are being a great mom. You still have limits and rules that are just bent for real illness, not broken. She still needs consistency, it will make your life easier when she is 15 and you have to leave her at home sick.
When my daughter is sick all time limits for tv go out the window. But I agree that watching tv after bedtime is unnecessary and there's no way my daughter would even be on the computer. I'd want her resting...not sitting up playing on the computer. Now if it's a Nintendo DS or something----I'd let her play it while resting on the couch...but that's about it.
She's sick, sure.
But you are teaching her that she cannot manipulate you. Sick or not.
How old is she anyway?
Is she a Daddy's girl? Meaning, she can manipulate him more than you?
And besides, as you said, she is JUST getting to the point where she is not 'throwing a fit' or begging for more computer time when her timer is up. So she still has to learn that... sick or not.
Do what you think is best.
Show your Hubby your responses if anything.
all the best,
Susan
When I am sick I lay on the couch and watch old movies and use my computer, so why can't a child? I don't understand why watching tv is such a bad thing when you are sick. I am sure there isn't much else to do when you aren't feeling well. If they can color, and play, and and read then they were obviously well enough to go to school. When you are sick you really don't want to do much of anything but lay around sleep, and watch tv. Sorry but when my kids were sick there were no rules, except they could not go out if they stayed home from school. That always prevented faking illness for a day off. If they stayed in bed I actually gave them a bell to call for me lol!! I was at their beck and call when they were ill. I guess I spoiled my kids.
Yes but for my convenience only. Hang out on the couch because it has a waterproof cover and wood floors while the kids room have rugs and mats. We don't let kids have juice unless sick and milk usually makes them worse so no milk.
You were kind to her all day. My Mom and I follow her rules...was when you are sick enough to stay home from school it is a time to rest and have peace. So all day you had to stay in bed except to go to the bathroom, sleep or read books and be brought chicken broth and liquids. If you said you were bored she would go and get your school work for you and then if you started whining more she would remove all books and turn out the light and say it must be time for a nap. We never wanted to be sick or take a skip day with her, we preferred school which was much more fun.
