Problems with Potty Training - Georgetown,TX

Updated on January 10, 2011
K.B. asks from Round Rock, TX
12 answers

I have been working potty training my 3 year old son for about a month now, and the last few days we have really been focusing on it. Suddenly today he is too scared to go on the potty. He just keeps saying too scared... too scared. He won't tell me why he is scared.

I am finding trying to potty train him in general is very frustrating for me and I am losing patience very quickly.

Any suggestions?

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T.L.

answers from Austin on

He might be manipulating you a little and using the "I'm scared" as a way to get out of it, just a thought. Keep gently pushing the potty training and don't give up, he will come around. Good luck!

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J.H.

answers from Houston on

I too found potty training my boy very frustrating. What I ended up doing was stop trying and let him tell me when he was ready. When he was ready, it was as if a light bulb went off and he never looked back! It was soooo much easier when he was ready then when everyone thought he should be. He was almost 4 when he decided he was ready. A really good friend told me not to worry; he won't go to Kinder. Not ready, so relax and it will happen...sure enough, it did and we never looked back. All that to say, maybe you should wait till he is really ready, then is sooo much eaiser for you both and saves a ton of frustration! Good luck girl!

1 mom found this helpful
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P.M.

answers from Portland on

This is a hard situation, K., because you really want this training done already. Unfortunately, your son is putting on the brakes, probably because the process is pushing him along at a pace he doesn't feel able to maintain. Fear is one of the ways people "protect" themselves from having to do something they can't, or at least, can't to someone else's satisfaction.

If your son senses your impatience and frustration (and kids are very perceptive), his "fear," which is real enough to him, will probably get worse. Lots of kids come to the needed maturity of the physical, neurological, and emotional systems later than 3. If you can back away from the actual pottying for awhile, and focus on coaching a playful and positive attitude, he'll probably get there faster than if you keep insisting that he try and try and try.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Potty training is a very difficult, very tiring process that has been noted to take longer to do with boys (especially). You have to make sure that your LO is ready and willing to start and do not force him to it nor should you punish him for any accidents. Maybe he isn't ready and that's why he is scared..? Do you have a little training potty or are you training on the regular toilet? Maybe a more fun kids potty might help out..check out these other potty training suggestions..they should really help you out! Good luck!

http://www.theskinnyscoop.com/search/potty+training?utm_c...

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S.V.

answers from Los Angeles on

I ahve a 3.5 year old that I attempted to train a couple of weeks ago, he did great on day 4, poop and pee, then decided to hold in his pee for hours on end and I got scrared so I decided to stop for a few weeks. I am going to try again over Pres. Day weekend and see how it goes. He is totally ready-he tells me he is peeing, tells me before he has to, he just says he doesnt want to be a big boy and he loves his diapers. I was frustrated beyond belief too and I am going to go in more patient and postive this time around!

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K.M.

answers from New York on

Is he afraid of the toilet itself? My son still uses his potty chair at home. He will go standing up at public restrooms but is not comfortable with poops on the big potty yet. This doesn't bother me because he has trained in steps and I know he will get there eventually. You may want to try a potty chair first if you are comfortable with it. Good luck!

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S.D.

answers from Austin on

I think you answered your own question. He can sense your urgency and is resisting the pressure. Like others said, I think you need to step back a little. Maybe just provide a reward for when he does it, but no pressure otherwise. I know how frustrating it is. My daughter is a little over 3 and I feel like we're never going to get there. She had poo down for months and now has started having accidents. Ugh!! I have tried all kinds of things that have not worked, but what I know for sure is when I start to push the issue, we backtrack. Hang in there.

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R.L.

answers from Houston on

Most boys potty train between 3-4 so you still have time, no need to rush. Take a deep breath and step back a little from the training. Keep encouraging him and reading him the books. Give him some incentives. I know what worked or my son was he got to pick out his own big boy underwear, but couldn't wear it until he was using the potty.

Don't worry it will click eventually and he will do it, just keep up with the gentle encouragement. When he does go make a big deal about how he is a big boy etc.

Good luck!

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M.K.

answers from New York on

Its a big change in his life. I cant give advice on how to potty train but I can tell you since it took me so long to do my boys what will get it started and going. Its the right reward. You dont force. Get something he really wants. Youd be surprised how quickly kids will perform. And if he likes attention and applause from others, get your mom over or someone else to cheer him on. You can really get it going with rewards and I say maybe some giftwrapped rewards. Also most kids LOVE running around naked. I say start naked

B.A.

answers from Austin on

Regarding potty training, see the link below for other tips along with the pointers below. Good luck!

http://blogs.goddardsystems.com/Cedar-Park-TX/2009/09/22/...

Adult toilets can be scary. Try any of the following:
Sit backward (facing the tank) so he can put his arms around the tank.
Buy trainer seat that goes on top of adult seat, avoids falling through the seat opening.

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J.M.

answers from Scranton on

My 4 yearold was difficult to train also. He wasn't trained untill he was 3 and 3/4. He refused. I gave up and tried again lots of times. I know how you feel. Maybe give it a break for a week or so.

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J.T.

answers from Victoria on

nanny 911 suggests that this is the boy gaining controll of the situation again. our son finds it fun to tinkle outside. if you live in an area where you can go some disstance away from the house with out the neighbors seeing., your son might also think its fun and get back in the grove. there are other ways of making potty training fun. ( book, stickers, aim for the cereral in the potty). dont fall for him saying he is scared but work through it as you would any fear he has. catering to it would only show him its ok to be scared of the non scary :D good luck.

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