Public School v.s Home Schooling

Updated on January 05, 2010
S.S. asks from Binghamton, NY
11 answers

My son is only 15 months so I have a little while to think this over however, I just watched a documentary on public schools, which successfully scared the you know what out of me when it comes to the peer pressure, drugs, and even the level of education he would get at a public school. Now I went to a public school my whole life but I have friends who were home schooled and I must say wow. These kids are great, intelligent, polite, a very close to their families (a very very important quality to me). Anyways, I was just hoping I could get some feedback on what you guys think.Thank you in advance

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L.

answers from New York on

Hi S.,
Happy New Year!
This is interesting indeed. I will definitely spend some time reading other inputs to get educated on this issue.
About drugs and stuff, I would like to point out that there are many people who went to public schools and are not into drugs. I feel bad when drugs are associated with public schools.
Thank you for bringing this up.
Take care,

L.
Helping Moms Work From Home.

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C.P.

answers from Albany on

I attended private schools growing up and have been teaching in public schools for 20 years. I firmly believe that you will ultimately have the most influence on your child's education no matter where he/she attends school. Parents who value education and convey that attitude to their children in a positive, supportive manner (not always as easy as it seems) are a student's greatest asset. To be permanently certified in NYS, teachers must have a masters degree and attend a minimum number of professional development hours each year (25 hours in my district). I believe that parents and teachers who work together provide the best education for the majority of children. Visit your local elementary school...PTA events etc. are a good opportunity to check out the atmoshere.
It sounds like your child already has a head start!

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L.P.

answers from New York on

Hi S..

I am currently homeschooling my kids...we are just starting out. My oldest is in 1st grade, and my youngest we're just doing some pre-school stuff. For me, at this point I think it's going to be a year to year decision. So far we are really enjoying it. Of course there are days I want to rip my hair out. :) But overall, it's been a great experience for all of us. I just wanted to say in regard to that last posting about kids being anti-social and not getting to go to things like kids in public school...it all depends on the parent. You really do see all kinds of homeschooling parents and believe me, there are some that I definitely would not want to model after. But just because your children are homeschooled does NOT mean that they are going to miss out on life. There is so much opportunity. It just depends on the you to find it and get your kids involved. And also, at the moment, statistically, colleges are really after homeschooled kids. I personally have a number of friends whose kids started college this year (that have been homeschooled from K-12) and have gotten FULL scholorships to really great schools. So, just looking at one homeschool family is not really a good way to make a decision...because like I said, I've seen quite a few that I would not want to follow in their footsteps.

Anyway, it's good to think ahead. 15 months is a great age and you are already "homeschooling" your child in a sense. There are so many things you can do to prepare him for school just in your daily life. :) And kids LOVE spending time with Mommy and learning together. Read to him lots!!!

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Hi S.,

It's never too early to think about your child's education and I certainly believe there are pro's and con's to each method of schooling - and different things may be best for each child, or at different stages in the child's life.
I work in a public elementary school, and there are things that happen which I don't think are in the best interest of the children and their education. Yes they learn, but certain things could be done better. In a classroom, they are sharing the attention of the teacher with 20+ other kids and are not learning at their own pace. The class may move ahead when they have not fully grasped a concept, or the class may be spending more time on a concept your child has fully grasped because the other kids haven't "gotten" it. I see a lot of wasted time as well.
When kids first start school, you don't need to worry about drugs and peer pressure, my oldest is 14 and started high school this year, this is the first time she's come into contact with kids doing drugs, etc. I would focus on what's best for his education when he first starts school. Remember that you may start with one or the other, and change as he gets older if you find it necessary.
My oldest has done very well in public school. She was made for this environment, despite having mild ADHD. She excels in school. My 10 year old would probably have done better in a Montessori or Waldorf school environment. He is in public school, but I don't feel this is necessarily the best choice for him.
Good luck in considering your decisions. When your son is closer to school age, speak with the principal of your local elementary school, speak to other parents of kids there, find out about their programs and how their classrooms and curriculum are structured, find out about homeschooling groups in your area and if private school is an option, look into the private schools, Montessori, Waldorf, etc so that you really know what all of your options are and what you think would be the best fit for your son once you see what his learning style is.

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A.P.

answers from New York on

It's never too early to think about your children's education. We started going to homeschooling conferences when our oldest was 7months. Now he's only 2.5. I'm not sure how you find out, but if you can, find a homeschooling conference or homeschooling group in your area and find out more information. Public schools aren't an option for us because of the things you mentioned and many more. And Private schools are expensive and the child is sometimes still exposed to those same things. I've also heard that homeschooling is a way of life. It's not just the way you educate your children. I would start looking into it as soon as you can and as much as you can.

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K.P.

answers from New York on

You are really thinking ahead! Definitely do some research and find out whether or not there is a home-school group in your community. These families may be willing to have you come spend a day with them to see what it's all about!

Couple of things to keep in mind...
1. Your child is still very young and he may be the type of child who thrives in a group setting. Make sure that you take his temperament into consideration.
2. Documentaries are one-sided. I work in a large suburban school district and can tell you that the majority of kids are good. There are definitely kids with problems, but your children will be living with, working with, interacting with these personalities for the rest of their lives! Keeping them sheltered during school will not keep them safe in college and beyond.
3. Ask yourself whether or not you are capable of being the sole educator of your child. Seriously- it is a lot of work to teach. Teachers get bashed all the time, which is unfortunate b/c it isn't easy! Being 1:1 with your child all day every day can be exhausting and you will be the only one responsible for making sure that he meets state standards.

Good luck and remember that you have time! You can also always change your mind.

*Someone posted that there is a lot of wasted time in schools... not sure where that would be b/c our kids are working from 8:15-3:10 every day with very little time to review or do "fun things"! Remember that it takes longer to teach a concept to 22 kids than to 1!

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A.D.

answers from New York on

I have friends who home-schooled their 2 boys until high school. The boys went to public school high school to participate in sports and because the curriculum is more advanced and there are more options and opportunities in the school.

I have known these boys their entire lives and they are wonderful kids (young adults, one is now in college, the other in HS). Another contributing factor is they were raised without TV, and they have great parents.

Here is what I observed. To do this well, you have to be really committed. It doesn't necessarily take a full 8 to 3 commitment, because there is a lot of wasted time in schools. But, you must be dedicated and figure out a routine that fits your schedule, a routine is necessary, they will need to do homework, it will just be different than what they get in the school.

If you are having discipline issues or personality conflicts between you and your child, you get no break while they are at school, because they are with you 24/7 (and these can happen between the sweetest, most well-behaved child and their parent, at times).

You still want your children to socialize with other kids, this is an important part of their development (even if it carries the risk of adding all those bad influences you are trying to avoid). You can add this socialization through sports or club activities, or possibly just through your neighborhood.

When your kids do eventually attend school (high school, college, etc.) they are going to be in for a shock. The 2 boys I know played with a lot of the kids from the school system growing up, they had great relationships with these kids, in both one on one, and small group levels. Then, they went to 8th or 9th grade, and these same kids that were wonderful to them outside the school, were mired in the various cliques and social structure of the schools and behaved MUCH differently in the school. The boys had never dealt with those social ills, and it took awhile to learn how to deal with this. It was nice they were able to avoid it as long as they did, but it was a big adjustment for them. And these bad social behaviors don't go away when you enter the work force.

One of the nice things home-schooling does allow you is the flexibility to travel and see the world (assuming you or your husband's jobs allow for this). You don't have to worry about pulling your kids out of school to go on vacation.

To sum up, yes homeschooling does produce wonderful children, but it involves a real commitment from the parents. Also, the boys I know went to public high school, so either the homeschooling or the involved parenting gave them the foundation to resist the peer pressure and the drugs, but I'm sure they were probably exposed to it (and from what I witnessed growing up, there is as much or more peer pressure and drug use in private schools as public).

Pick an area to live that has the best school system you can find, this will give you more options for your kids education. Homeschooling definitely has benefits, but it's not without flaws either. The same is true of private schools, plus they can be costly, and they are not all equal education-wise, there are average public schools that still provide a better education than some private schools.

The more involved you are in your kids lives, the better they'll grow up to be.

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L.B.

answers from New York on

S.,

I was homeschooled myself and I loved it. I would strongly recommend it, but only in the right circumstances. It is not for everyone.

First of all, it is an enormous commitment. For as long as your kids are homeschooling, you are a teacher, in addition to being mom, wife, housekeeper, It is an enormous job and requires an amazing amount of time and patience. It is also expensive because you have to buy books and pay for the extra-curricular activities that often come free in school (art lessons, sports teams, drama classes, etc. all have to be paid for, but are usually offered free through school). If course, if you homeschool, you also don't have the opportunity to work while the kids are in school, which cuts back on your family income, if that's a concern for you.

Also, with homeschooling, it's best to join a homeschool group so that your kids have certain a activities with other kids. The problem is that rather than everyone and all their friends being from your town, they are from all over. My mom taught my youngest brother most of his schooling in the car for the first 5-6 years because she was driving the older two kids to activities and friends' every day, which were often 1 hour away. You may also find your children get less natural exposure to people of other races, cultures, etc., so my parents always had to make it a point to get us involved in activities outside our natural circle of friends (again, something that takes time and planning).

Also, you will find that many of the other homeschoolers you meet are conservative Christians. Certainly not everyone, but a majority or large percentage are. That may or may not be a good thing for you, depending on your own beliefs.

I only say those things because I think it's important to understand that it's not really easy, at least once the kids get a little older. That being said, I had an amazing xperience homeschooling! My family is extremely close, my brothers and I are all well-socialized (as a result of all the cultural and extra curricular activities my parents involved us in), and we were all at the very top of our classes in college. Most of my homeschooled friends excelled in school, and I have to say they are some of the kindest and most respectful kids I know. However, I'm not sure that they are that way just because they were homeschooled. Parents who choose to homeschool put a lot of emphasis on education, on family, morals, etc. It's entirely possible that parents with those values would have raised the same kind of kids whether they went to public or private school. It's a chicken and egg question -- do the values (which inspire homeschooling) lead to kids like that, or does the homeschooling inspire values that lead to kids like that? Who can say?

You just need to figure out what's best for you and your family! And remember, you're making the decision only for one year, not forever. If you choose to homeschool in kindergarten, you can always choose school for 1st grade. Of if you choose school for kindergarten, you can always homeschool in first grade. Make the decision 1 year at a time, and always be flexible to your family's changing needs. I firmly believe there's no right or wrong answer!

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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

I think public schools are the way to go BUT that depends where you live. We have very good ones with tons of activities/facilities, so even private can't seem to compete.

Seems a documentary on public schools is useless beyond showing THE SPECIFIC schools in the video. Remember it's all about the parenting. It's a super important job. Even at a "bad" school, a child can do well and turn out fine. Likewise, I watched some kids at the best schools in the state throw their lives away. The fact you care shows a lot!

A quick search at greatschools.org shows Binghamton as having some of the worst rated schools in the country. Find and research your schools so you can make an informed decision. And, sometimes a Catholic school for one child is reasonably priced. If the public schools get bad ratings, that's an option.

My kids would not want to be home all day so we never did homeschooling. My son loves Pre-K! Then when he does get home he feels he's been out, at least.

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B.L.

answers from Rochester on

I would have to say that public schools are the way to go. Yes, they are pressures that you have to be aware of but that is a fact of growing up and something you must learn to become a successful adult. If you are sheltered from these pressures, you will not be able to cope when you enter college or living on your own.
I knew a family that was homeschooled and they never really had successful friendships, didn't do well and skipped college because they weren't good at socializing.
They told me they always wished they went to school and got to go to dances, join clubs, make friends, and so much more.
If you live in a bad area then that could be your only option, if not, I would go with public education.

Good luck!

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K.H.

answers from Utica on

Hi S.
God bless you
I am 100% in favor of and homeschooled my twins. The thing with homeschooling--- to have successful adults-- is to be committed, dedicated to your responsibility to homeschool. Nothing comes before teaching your children. It becomes your most important job if you are going to do it.
Write me and I would love to talk about some of the brass tacks of it, but you are correct in your assessment homeschoolers for the most part have role models that are disciplined people. They are brought up with values.
As for success, my twins were homeschooled they are now in their 4th semester at colleges of their choice and both have been on the dean's list each semester. They think that college is easier than high school. I am sure it is easier than their high school because we did difficult work and when they were successful we moved on because there is always more to learn. They know how to work because we did.
Love to talk about homeschooling
God bless you as you make a decision
K. --- SAHM married 39 years --- adult Christian school children -- 38,coach; 33, lawyer, married with son, & daughter on the way; homeschooled twins 19.

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