Putting a 5 Month Old down to Sleep

Updated on July 07, 2010
C.H. asks from Portland, OR
11 answers

I made a related post on this last week, but the problem has changed slightly so I'll start over. My son has become impossible to lay down in his crib to sleep. Just impossible. I have tried everything, from laying him down on his side, laying him down on his back, with a pillow, without a pillow, with a blanket, without a blanket, swaddled, not swaddled, and all combinations. I've tried letting him relax in his bed instead of rocking him to sleep, I've tried nursing him to sleep. Nothing works. As soon as he hits the crib, he wakes up, wide awake, stiffens his body, and cries. He just cannot relax enough to sleep in his bed anymore. He could be just falling asleep when I put him down or so deeply asleep that the dogs barking won't wake him up. But set him down and all of a sudden, all the lights are on. The other night, he even started kicking his legs like a two year old having a tantrum whenever I would lay him down.

Of all the ways to put him down to rest, swaddling works the best. But that's not going to work now that it's finally feeling like summer in Portland. I don't want him overheating and sweating all night wrapped up tightly in a blanket on a hot summer night.

Do you other moms have any tips for getting a baby to stay asleep when you put them down in the crib?

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Featured Answers

J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Mine slept mostly in her bouncey chair or her swing, and then later on with me in bed (boyfriend slept on the couch). I tried everything to get her to sleep in that crib and she refused. As soon as she started walking she was in her own bed (at 1year). Hang in there, Good Luck!

More Answers

Y.C.

answers from New York on

Hi C.,
Just a tought, when my baby was around your baby age, she did the same thing, but she also scratch her ears. When I took her to the doctor he told me she had an ear infection, and she was more in pain when she lay down.
Is your baby scratching his ears? Does he fall sleep better when he is straight up? Maybe you should bring him to the doctor to check he is not sick (ear or Thought infection). Is his nose congested, when he lays he probably would have more problem with the congestion.
Also around that age they need more food, are you only feeding him milk, maybe he is hungry? Or to hot or to cold?
If is nothing of this check his mouth, some babies start teething early, are his gum swallow?
Other than that, he may just want momy, and well, is working for him.
But make sure first that is nothing that is causing him pain.
If he only wants the attention, well, it depends on each mom and their parent style.

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T.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would say first bring him to the doctor to make sure he does not have an ear infection, or maybe even reflux that makes him very uncomfortable to lay down flat. If all is well, then i agree with just putting him down awake so he learns to self sooth. It will probably take a good couple weeks but will be well worth it. If he cries, let him cry for like 10 min and go in and calm him down maybe give him a nuk if he will take one or a teething ring to chew on and leave. If he cries again let him cry and then go in again. He will eventually get it and it will get easier. Good luck!

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D.F.

answers from Portland on

My daughter also slept in a swing from about 5 - 8 months old. We had it on all night. It was the sideways rocking one that I couldnt live without. She didnt really use it during the day but it sure gave us sanity at night. Find one with a plug in as we went through too many batteries to mention.

My daughter liked to he held day and night and I think the comfort and snuggle of the swing chair really helped. She also liked music all night that we just kept on repeat.

I say do anything you can to ensure everyone in the house gets sleep!

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J.V.

answers from Chicago on

It's time for the baby to figure out how to sleep for himself., Put him down WIDE AWAKE. Yes, he will protest. Pick him up and calm him down, but you need to start teaching him how to self-sooth. Yes, it will take some time, but now is the time to do it. I did the baby whisperer method: when cry, pick up, as soon as calm, put back down. You can use a shh/pat until 6 months, at which point you drop the shhh... I did this with my son, and by 5 months I could literally just pat his butt and say "time for bed, go to sleep, i love you," and he'd roll over. It was so worth all the sleepless nights, because he is a brilliant sleeper now, and at 6 months, he started literally asking to go to his crib for a nap!

Let me also say this: if you fell asleep and someone moved you, wouldn't you wake up, startled? Your son isn't a newborn anymore, but a very awake person that is aware of almost everything.

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R.C.

answers from Portland on

I bought a wool crib mattress pad from Lawson sheepskins. I think it helped make it a soft, quiet landing when my son hit the mattress. If he started to wake up fussing, I picked him up immediately, soothed him back to sleep, put him down again, if he still fussed, I repeated, until he stayed asleep. It might take 5-10-15 minutes, and I think it helped for him to not fuss enough to wake all the way up. I probably did that for less than a week before it wasn't an issue anymore.

I'm going to suggest investigating a physical reason for not being able to relax enough to fall asleep. I would take him to an acupuncurist who does pediatric tuina; it's just Chinese acupressure and massage, not needles. I have a friend who did this for her daughter with colic and it worked immediately. They treat all kinds of fussy conditions and illnesses. In Portland, An Sen acupuncture does it http://www.portlandacupuncture.net/. I also have a book I got off of Amazon, I think it's by Bob Flaws? for pediatric tuina. It gives very simple massage moves you can do yourself.

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A.D.

answers from Portland on

I apologize if what I say is a repeat of what others have said already; I have not had a chance to read anything yet.

When babies fall asleep, they go through phases. The first is light sleep, and it sounds like your guy is in light sleep. So putting the baby down right after he falls asleep, or even 5 minutes after he falls asleep, will shock him awake and cause him to cry/fuss, etc.

Deeper sleep doesn't hit until 15-30 minutes in. It is important, if you're rocking baby to sleep, to do it for 15-20 minutes. Wait for the muscle twitches to stop, wait for the smiles and the hands to stop. Wait until baby is basically dead weight in your arms. Their arms would hang down to the sides if you let them; or if you lift them above them, they'd simply fall limply down. This is the time to lay them down in the crib :)

Shushing noises like the sound of the mother's heart in the womb help, as well. At 5 months, he is still dependent on you and cannot "learn to sleep" on his own, so CIO is basically just him crying himself to sleep out of exhaustion, not from learning to sleep. It's a form of learned helplessness.

I sure hope that helps! Our girl is a champion sleeper (she is now 2) and we used this to get her to sleep. Hope it helps!

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S.W.

answers from Portland on

if swaddling works, do it! when it gets hot i have put my babies in nothing but a diaper and then swaddle them. they are warm but rarely too hot and will wake up in discomfort if they are too hot. you can also use more breathable fabrics to swaddle, like the aden + anais gauzy blankets or i even made some out of regular jersey from the fabric depot outdoor sale. good luck!

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi,
I had trouble with my first son as well. My son slept in his infant swing till he was 1 year old,,,,YES all night.Imagine that, a beautiful crib not used till he tuned 1. My little Jeremy would ONLY sleep in his swing. Just hang in there, keep trying different things until you find something that works. I know you must be beyond frustrated. Like I said, hang in there. It'll get better.
Another suggestion, try using a pacifier. I know all the books say don't do that but I do for my 8 month old and it works!

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K.S.

answers from Kansas City on

My five month old went through this too. It only lasted about a week. I wonder if it has anything to do with them teething or possibly a growth spurt. The other day he slept in his crib from 8p.m. until 11a.m. the next day, so I know he's wearing himself out by not sleeping well in his crib. So far, the last few days he's back to sleeping great in his crib. Give it a little time and he should be back to normal too. I know it's frustrating, hang in there!

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R.W.

answers from Tulsa on

You probably already have tired this, but just a shot in the dark:

Have you tried a pacifier yet? I read that your were nursing and I know that it's advised to not use pacifiers because of nipple confusion, but I think that it might be worth a try as long as you continue to feed him normally during the day, I don't see the harm it could do just for when he's sleeping. And pacifiers might help prevent SIDS.

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