I have a question regarding daycare etiquette. Yesterday at my son's daycare, I was approached by another parent. He said that he was told by one of the teachers that our children had an altercation during the day. They were fighting over a toy and she said that my 2 year old child head butted his son in the nose. Politely, I said that it must have been an accident(I don't think that this was a premeditated action. I could see him hitting the other child, but not a head butt). He got very defensive and said "No, I don't think that it was an accident." I said "sorry" and I left the daycare. On the way home, I became angry at my daycare facility for telling the other parent my son's name. I don't think that I should have been put into that situation by my daycare, especially without warning. What do all of you think? I have never once asked my daycare who hit or bit my child so that I could approach the childs parent. Kids will be kids. Before everyone gets angry, I don't know if my child was at fault, he may have been, I wasn't there to see. I just want to know if my daycare should have given this other parent my son's name?
The teachers should never give out names. You have a right to be angry. I would talk to the teachers and the director.
Also the other parent may have been more upset that you call it an "accident".Children will be children. They will hit, bite, kick, push, scream whatever it takes to get or keep what they want. It is not an accident. They are acting like 2 year olds and learning how to take turns, share, and use their words.
Hi J., my name is L. and I'm a Licensed Child care Provider. No your child name should not have been told. This is against DCF rules and regs. You should talk to the owner and file a complaint again the daycare and it's their job to get to the bottom of it to see who gave out your private information. again I's sorry that you and your child went through something like that. Hope everything works out.
I agree that it may not have been the daycare provider. You can ask if it was, but it may have been the offended child, or another child in the room. Both of my kids have been in daycare facilities since they were babies, and in every room after the children are verbal, there was always at least one child who would come and report every thing my child did that day that wasn't to his/her liking. Teachers and daycare centers try to keep things confidential, but I try to take comfort in the fact that I would rather know too much than have a child abused and not be told by anyone.
It's the other parent who needs to be spoken with by the center, if the center did not reveal the information. That was an inappropriate way to respond. I feel sorry for the parent and their child. I hope they don't believe that they will be able to follow their child through elementary, jr. high and high school and contacting other parents about every small thing that happens.
(By the way, when my son was 2,he got hit by a flying car in the face, and ended up getting stitches the night before we flew cross-country for my brother's wedding that he was in, and I don't hold it against the child or parent. These things happen....)
Your daycare facility may have not told them, the child may have if he/she is verbal enough. My son was bit by a kid and the facility didn't tell me, but my son did. Don't worry about the other parents. Some parents are just idiots, plain and simple. They didn't handle it well and sounds like you did.
We teachers try to be discreet in order to prevent parents from confronting one another and to protect everyone's privacy, But, sometimes it's very difficult because once you tell a parent about an incident, they always ask their child who was involved.
As a parent, if someone told me my child head butted someone in the nose, I would immediately ask the teacher what she observed. That way, I could find out if I need to watch for this potentially dangerous behavior at home and in social settings. Even if it was just an accident, it's an opportunity for learning.
