Retaining a Child from 2Nd Grade Who Just Turned 8 - Woodbridge,NJ

I think you should definitely move him now. They say it's better to be a little behind because you rise up to the other kid's level. But to be so bored and have it all come easy for him is not good....plus he's so much older than the other kids! If he struggles hire a tutor to give him a bit of extra help for a while.

Bump him back up. He's really old for 1st grade. My son is 8 in 3rd grade (born March 2008). Do they really give A, B, C grades in K? I've never seen that in the 5 states we've lived--we've never lived in NJ. The earliest my kids have ever received A, B, C grades was 3rd grade. K-2 was (E)xcellent, (N)eeds Improvement, etc.

You need to fight this. Your child is much too old to be in first grade. Children who turn 8 in the fall should be in second grade, or depending on the cutoff, even third grade. He will have a lot of problems as he gets older being in a class with peers so much younger than he is.

He will catch up academically when you put him in second grade. I wouldn't worry at all about the work he has missed so far. Get some extra help for a couple of months and he'll be fine.

The school needs to understand that your son is placed in the wrong grade and understand the types of problems it will lead to down the road.

Sounds like you had terrible advice. Everyone worried about grades and testing, and not about maturity and social skills and so on.

Stop worrying about grades! He's 8! Who cares about his B+ or his A? Way too much pressure on a young child.

Reading skills pick up at different ages, and they pick up if you just read to your child every night before bed, after school, etc. - and let them "help" read to you too! (You do a page, they do a page.)

I wouldn't do a tutor for an 8 year old. Just shut off the computer and turn off the TV, but not making it about punishment or "you have to work on reading." Your children should see you reading, and want to join in. Board games that require reading are great too. So are things like reading a take-out menu, a cookbook (and cooking helps with math skills), a TV schedule, or the descriptive exhibit labels in a museum.

I don't understand why an 8 year old should be in a class with 6 year olds, and I don't know what the process was to make this decision, especially on only the second day of school. Get with the school psychologist and the literacy specialist (if there is one), and work out a plan.

Being 8 in 1st grade seems like a social strain on your son (if not really necessary for other reasons). It sounds like you should talk to the school about trying to change his grade, even simply because of the age difference.

I have seen several kids from private school 'bomb' the standardized tests when they first enter public school. Not because they are less intelligent or not as educated, but because they have not been taught to the test as their public school peers. After a few months in the public school their abilities show and they score appropriately for their skills/knowledge.

Wow. I can't believe they put an 8 year old in first grade. If you can afford private school, I am guessing you can do 'extra services' to get him up to level and in 2nd grade. Is he okay in the class or does he feel out of place around 6 year olds?

He would be on the older age for 2nd grade, yet he is now in 1st grade.

How is his self esteem with the other kids? Does he want to play with kids in higher grades? How does this impact sports/extra curricular activities? Most are split by age and he could be with 8 and over outside of school.

So he would basically be 6 weeks behind? I wouldn't worry about it at all and would push HARD for him to be in his age appropriate grade. There is nothing in 1-2 months of first grade that can't be made up or skipped.

Reading often takes off 2nd half of 2nd grade.
I'm concerned that so many parents seem to think their child is 'late' if they aren't reading by kindergarten.
Where ever they are getting that info - they need to know it's a load of manure.

Ours has a late Oct birthday and where he goes to school you have to be 5 on or before Sept 30 to start.
So he was 5 for 2 months in kindergarten before he turned 6.
(So he was 8 in 2nd grade.)

He's always the tallest/oldest in his class unless there are any earlier Oct birthdays.
It's worked out extremely well for him.
Where younger classmates had trouble sitting still - he was over his fidgeting and school was a lot easier for him because of this.
While his friends were goofing off and not paying attention, he'd listen to the teacher, get his work done, and could do some recreational reading (with the teachers permission) while the rest of the class continued working.
It worked out well for him in middle school too, and in high school as well.
So far (he's a senior this year) he's managed to keep up his straight A's, he's got high SAT and ACT scores and colleges are doing what they can to recruit him.

I'd think hard about trying to get your son back into his original grade level.
Leaving him in his current grade might work out just right for him in the long run.
If his school work isn't challenging him - provide him with outside school opportunities to learn about what ever interests him.
Museums, rocket clubs, planetariums, aquariums, etc.
Our son had a phase where he liked to build model catapults.
And then he used a model he'd already built for extra credit in a high school history class.
He's in STEM and interested in engineering and already has some college credits earned while he's in high school.
We're very happy with his being on the older side while he's going through school.

Move him now. Just do it. Have a tutor until at least the beginning of 2017. Get a lawyer involved if you need to. If you do that, the school will take you seriously.

Have you talked with his teacher about putting him in 2nd grade? This shouldn't be a fight. Work with the school to move him ahead. The teacher and other school staff are also interested in doing what is best for your child.

Is the school hesitant because your son is not keeping up in other areas? Why is he missing so much school work? You say he gets homework done in 10 minutes. Is he not doing all of his homework? Does he not pay attention in class? What are his scores in other academic areas?

I suggest talking with his teacher about all learning concerns so that you understand the bigger picture will help you get him placed in the grade most helpful for him. Am important part of his needs is social. The difference between 6 and 8 can be an important part of this picture. Talk with his teacher about how he gets along with his classmates. There are different kinds of maturity. Consider that he may be more mature in some areas and less in others.

Look at his needs in a broad way, not just his reading level.

Sounds like you don't trust the school because of your experience with your daughter's reading levels. Consider that through discussion your daughter was placed appropriately. Consider that your success with her is a success. You reached your goal.

I would fight it and have him do much more than the ten minutes reading and extra help at home I also wouldn't want my son graduating from high school just four months shy of 20 years old.

My husband moved districts in the third grade with his twin. This was a much more rigorous district so they just turned 19. Two months befor graduation.

My daughter turned 8 in April of second grade...and completed most of third grade while 8.

Being 8 in first grade is ridiculous!! (She is 9 in fourth grade and will be until April when she turns 10).

I would fight tooth and nail to get him moved into a second grade class.

As far as the common core math...Google and YouTube are your very best friends!! We are in Texas and not Common Core but they still teach it in elementary. (I never had issues finding examples to help me understand what and how they were teaching in math by just looking it up online).

Good luck in dealing with your school!! Big hugs...

Personally, I would leave him in first grade. You hired him a tutor for the summer. This work he is doing should be easy. It's review for him. This may be the confidence he needs. There is a correlation of slow reader/not good comprehension. Build his fluency-have him read out loud. Check comprehension. Ask him questions. Just a thought, you stick him back in 2nd grade and he starts falling behind, now what? Flip him back to first grade. It sounds like your guilt is getting the best of you. Where is he going to be the most successful?

A couple of things stand out to me here. First, they are required to provide Title 9 support services to kids who have specific issues like your son's. He should have been offered extra reading help through the school. He should have been fully evaluated for specific learning disabilities and an IEP put in place. Second, retaining a child for just that reason is ridiculous, that alone is reason enough to move him. To another school.

is the school open to moving him?
if not, will they agree to provide him with some more enrichment material?
i'll bet they will if they're approached properly.
if not, then it'll be on you to enrich him in an interesting and engaging fashion at home (don't drill or inundate him with worksheets.)
khairete
S.

The school year is fairly new. This is October, not May. I'd ask if he could "shadow" the classes for a day and see how he feels about the work.

He is in 2nd grade.. my son still hates to read and he is in 7th.. I can't believe they wanted to hold him back.. my son was tested in third grade and his reading level was beginning first grade!

That's why there is a thing called an IEP. Helps them work on areas they are behind or weak in.. good lord.

Put him in the right grade.. have them establish an IEP for a reading goal.. he will catch up..

I am not a fan of retention at all. Most studies show the only "good" reason to retain a child would be if they physically missed class. Other than that studies show that kids do better if promoted with intervention. Schools seem to buy into the theory that if we do the same thing over and over again we should expect different results....insanity!

I am in Florida and our cut off date is 9/1. My son's bday is August 26, 2010 and he is in first grade at 6. He will be 7 in second grade and 8 in third grade. Many children will turn 8 in second grade - but if you son turned 8 on 9/19 - then he should probably be in 2nd - unless NJ has a much later birthday cut off. He needs to be evaluated and an IEP put in place to deal with whatever...he should NOT be in first grade.

So sorry you are going thru this K.. I was told the same thing about my son in 3rd grade and yes he could read but slow reader with comprehension problem. He is ADHD and loses focus easy. I finally took him out of school and home schooled him for 5th & 6th grade. He is now in 7th and doing good. Problem now he is too social and girl crazy. Ugggg. Hang in there and go to the school and get him in the right grade and put him on a plan to catch him up. He will be fine. You are his voice. Good Luck

I think when a child passes a grade they shouldn't be held back at all. They might struggle BUT they might excel and pass without problems.

I think it's too late to move him up now. If you home school him for the rest of the year with a real program like K-12 that works with the state to make sure that the appropriate materials are done then you can put him up into 3rd grade next year.

Kids should be 5 when they start kindergarden then turn 6 during the year or that next summer.

They should be 6 going into 1st grade and turn 7.

Be 7 going into 2nd grade and turn 8. And so forth. Then they are 17 going in as a senior and turn 18 that next senior year.

It's very hard on kids when they're held back. I read a lot of articles on this subject and even the department of education agrees that holding kids back isn't great. They stated that 45% of kids held back don't even graduate high school, that was startling. There are 55% that do eventually graduate and some have no problems but if there is any way to put your child up in his actual age group grade, then I think you should do it.