Schedule for Feedings and Night Time Sleep

We have a 4 months old baby. Starting from 12 weeks, we'd put her down around 7:30pm or 8:00pm and fed her one more time before we went to bed which was around 10:30pm or 11:00pm (dream meal). We went to see her ped. yesterday and he told us to cut down the dream meal. Just let her sleep from 8:00pm to morning. If she wakes up in the middle of the night, just let her cry for 10 to 20 mins. She should sooth herself to fall back asleep...Well, we did it last night. She slept from 8pm to almost 9am but that might be because of the shot!!!! Anyway, I think you should put her to bed earlier :)

When my daughter was that age, she would sleep from about 10p-6a. As she got older, we eventually got her bedtime down to 8pm.

Hello,
I am the mother of a soon to be three year old daughter. If putting her to bed at 10pm is okay with you and she sleeps all night and wakes up pretty happy in the mornings, then there is no reason to put her down earlier. I would only recommend putting her down earlier if she wasn't getting enough sleep or seemed really fussy in the evenings. My daughter has always gone been going to bed at 9pm for a long time. When she was a very small infant she went to bed later, but as she got a little older I started putting her down at 9. It works good for us because I work until 5pm, so I still get to spend several hours with her in the evening, yet she goes down early enough that I still have a few hours to myself before going to bed. Really there is no rule for what time they should go to sleep or get up. You just have to find out what works best, by trial and error. Good luck and remember to trust your instincts. Mom always knows what's best.

Every 2-3 hours was my schedule with my kiddos until I could introduce food which changed things some. - think it depends on the child though. Question for you, if you had the opportunity to be home with your daughter would you be interested? I show Mom's how they can earn income at home and work towards replacing their income so they can work from home full time. Visit my Website: www.AHomeCareer.com or you can contact me through my profile and share with you what I do. Blessings, C.

It sounds like you are doing great! She will adjust to almost any schedule you put her on. A 10pm bedtime is okay for her age because she gets much sleep during their daytime naps. If you put her to bed much earlier, she most likely will wake during the night - which also means you and your hubby may not get a full night of sleep.

I am a mother of a 16 month old and as I recall that was about the same schedule I had her on at that age. Sleeping through the night is most important for you and your husband since you are both working. I would stick with this routine if it seems to be working out for you all!

Good luck,
T.

the way that my husband and i did it, is we gave our son a couple extra ounces in his last bottle at night, to hold him over...and we started moving his bedtime back like 15 minutes a night, until we got to a time that was good for us.
there were a couple times that he got up in the middle of the night, but that was when he was going through a growth spurt, and needed to eat more.
now, he's 17 months old, and he still gets about 7-8 oz of milk in a sippy cup before he goes to bed around 8pm. i think it's just whatever works for you and your schedules. my husband and i both work full-time...it's tough, but it's for the better-ment (?) of the family...eventually it won't be that bad. :)
good luck!

first i would say that if you have to wake her up to feed her at 6am then she might sleep a little longer on her own the advanatage to this is that you can find her natural sleep and eating patterns, which is soo much easier to deal with then trying to force a pattern. we found that our son - now 7mos. reallyu needed to be in bed by 9pm - we were trying to keep him up till 10-thinking he would sleep longer in the morning, this is not true ge gsts up between 6:30 and 7 no matter when he goes down. try letting her sleep until she wakes on her own in the morning and see how it goes from there.

Sounds like you are doing fine. Let her sleep at day care!! You need to enjoy her as much as possible!!

I just recently went through the same thing. My little girl is 5 months and started at daycare a month ago. She had a similar schedule to your little one before we started daycare. I now wake her up at 7 if she is not already awake, feed her (she eats approx. every 4 hours), then we are on our way. Unfourtunatly she isn't able to sleep very well at the daycare with the other little noisemakers around (she gets about 2 hours vs. the 3.5 she was getting at home). She let us know she was tired (a bit cranky when we picked her up) and would end up falling asleep during her 7pm nursing. I have since moved her bedtime to 7 and she wakes up once in the night to nurse. It's sad that I don't get to spend as much time with her in the evenings, but the smiles in the morning from my well rested baby are worth it!

I recenly finished reading "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" (Weissbluth) and it stated that babies in this age range require an average of 14 hours sleep every day!

T. -

You are doing great. I have a 2.5 month old son. Who is indeed the love of my life - I am sure you can understand.

In order to return to work, I placed my son with a sitter. It broke my heart to leave him the first time, so I totally know how you feel about that. I stayed for almost an hour before I could convince myself to leave. I told myself if I didn't leave it was only a visit, not childcare. I just felt like I was going to abandon him when I walked out the door. However, on the upside, it gets easier. He likes his sitter and that makes a BIG difference.

Regarding feeding, if your little one is sleeping through the night that is wonderful. My little guy goes to bed between 10:15 and 10:30. I also wondered if it was too late, but you have to do what works best for your little one and your household. I'm breastfeeding my son, so he can only go so long without eating. So, a 10ish bedtime works for me because it allows him to sleep deeper into the night. He sleeps for about 4-5 hours before he needs to eat again. At that point, he is back to about every 2 -3 hours. So that first sleeping period is really important for us both. As he gets older and is able to sleep longer and eat more, I'll gradually move his bedtime up. But right now, he is just a little guy and 10ish seems to work very well.

Don't doubt yourself. Go with what works. They are only babies for a little while and before you know it you'll have homework, after-school activities, and 8:00 bedtimes :)

Hello. I am a stay at home mom with a 10 and a 3 year old daughter. I am in Conway and am looking to keep 1-2 children here at my home during the work day. Feel free to contact me if you are interested. I have many references. As for feedings, I feel that if she is sleeping through the night, you are in good shape. As long as her belly is full she will be content. My girls were usually in bed between 9 and 10 also.

I also have a 4 month old and she is on about the same schedule. She goes down for the night about 9:30 and sleeps through the night. She wakes up inbetween 6 and 7. As long as your little on isn't cranky earlier then 10 I says it's ok. I have 2 other kids 4 and 2 and I noticed after about 6 months the night time sleep increases to about 12 hours instead of 8.

When both of my daughters were that age, they were in bed by 7 pm. And they usually slept until about 7 am. They need lots of sleep and are happier for it. Maybe not that early for your little one, but I would say to put her to be a bit earlier. Just make your bedtime routine earlier and earlier until you reach a good bedtime for her.

You should have the baby in bed by 9pm which should be the last feeding time.

Hey T.,

I have had 3 kids all on that very same scheudle. I think at this age a 10 pm bottle is perfect to get her throught the night. I would slowly start to put her earlier bed in increments of 15 minutes. So for one week put her to bed at 9:45. the next week 9:30 and so on. I would start to move the bed time earlier when her day naps go from 3 to 2 and she really starts to move around and use more energy. Probably around 5 to 6 months. Until then just enjoy the fact that she sleeps all night. You are ahead of a lot of other moms.

S.

I'm a stay-at-home Mom of a 21 month old girl with another baby due in October. I've been told and read that infants need about 12 to 14 hours of sleep a day. Since she's getting a really good long stretch at night I wouldn't mess with it. Just try to be sure she's getting the extra hours at Daycare and maybe a short nap in the early evenings at home. My daughter started sleeping about 10 hours at night and napping really well at around 4 months. We just shifted her feedings a little earlier and closer together to accomodate the sleep schedule. The routine is the important thing, not so much the actual time schedule. Now, at 21 months my daughter sleeps from 9 PM(or 9:30) until about 8 AM. Then I lay her down for her nap around 2 or 3 PM and she sleeps for two hours or more. I've read that children need about 13 hours of sleep until they're well into grade school. Of course some babies (and children) need a little more or less. However, I do attribute my daughter's lack of major tantrums and unusually good mood in the mornings and after naps to the amount of sleep she gets. I have friends with children who get quite a bit less and they are not fun to be around.

The most important thing to figure out is what works for you. There are so many books and friends with advice that just may not work for your routine/schedule. I try to make sleep a priority for my daughter because it is for me. I've struggled with insomnia for years and I don't want my daughter to have the same issue. So I try to be sure she's getting adequate rest. But it's a little easier for me to dictate her routine since I'm the one with her all day. I would try to get the Daycare to work with you as much as possible. You are the mother and should be the one determining your child's care, even if you can't be there every second.

I applaud you for returning to work and appreciate your struggles. I do remember how it feels to be concerned about how much they eat and sleep. It's hard when there is no one to tell you exactly what to do. That's what I wanted. I've just discovered it's because it's works out differently for everyone.

If I could change one thing I did during my son's infancy, it would have been to not focus as much on scheduling his feeding and sleeping. I was pretty desperate for some semblance of order amid the colic chaos, and had a really hard time interpreting his cries as many moms can, since he cried all the time despite our best efforts. So, I was often unsure if he was crying for food, or for comfort, or for tiredness, and tried to figure it out by figuring out what his schedule may be.

The biggest secret I've learned with raising my son, now almost 4, is that he is not easy to predict, and can not be fitted to a clock schedule. His needs for more or less sleep, more or less food, and even more or less pottying vary from day to day, even now. I wish now that I'd just tried to feed him whenever he cried and ignored all the advice I read in magazines about not being a human pacifier, or about needing to get him on a schedule.

Since that time, I've asked a lot of mothers about this, and the ones who seemed to have had the best experiences, are the ones who didn't stick to clock schedules and responded, instead, to the baby's cues, even if they seemed to be at irregular times. I'm seeing this work out beautifully with my new niece right now. I can really see that she seems very secure that her caregivers will show up and fulfill her needs, whenever they arise. According to academic child psych, this is her primary task the first 6 mos, to develop that security in her environment and with her caregivers.

I remember how desperate I was that first year, and especially the first 6mos for some predictability and scheduling. Despite what all the parenting books, like "The Baby Whisperer," and magazines said, in my life, I think it made things harder for us, honestly, and may even have set us up for some of my son's current control issues. It's a big thing to say, but that really was my main regret.

If she's sleeping between a 10pm feeding to a 6am feeding, that's extraordinary among what I usually hear at 4mos. At about 4 months, my son slept for 6 hour periods overnight and it was a real blessing. He also seemed to start his night sleeping period around 10pm, though his range could be between 9pm-midnight. Sometimes, he would cut it short and wake up in about 4 hours for a wee hours feeding, if he was extra hungry that day. During the day, 4hours between feeding times was the max we could go with our son... but he was a breastfeeder, and the time period between feedings can be somewhat shorter than for formula-fed babies. 2-3 hours was more usual for us for at least 6mos. I tried setting a 3.5-4 hour schedule and it was a disaster.

All told, though, like other moms here have mentioned, I'd just go with what seems to make her happy. Each baby is different... and in my experience... each day's schedule can vary, too, even for the same child. If she seems tired earlier, put her to bed, if not, don't, especially if the timing works out well for you for a 6am feeding. Putting her to bed earlier could shift that wake-up time earlier, since 8hours overnight seems to be on the longer end of the normal timespan at that age.

Best wishes,
B.

p.s.
I just noticed several writers mention that 8 hours was either normal or not enough for a 4 mos old. This is the first time I've heard this; I normally heard that 6hour stretches were a good "normal" to hope for at 4mos. Eventually, they do stretch to more of an 11hr range, but at 4mos, that seems awfully long to me. It certainly didnt' work out that way for my son. So, I googled to find out what "normal ranges" may be published out there and found a great website with links so several sleep studies for infancy to determine what is ideal:

http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/sleepstudies.html

The mom who collected the links prefaces them with this:

"Probably one of the main reasons that babies who don't sleep through the night are such a big issue is that parents don't have realistic expectations of the sleep patterns of babies. Babies were designed to wake up often at night to feed and cuddle, and keep in mind that many adults wake during the night, too. If our expectations for babies were not so different from our babies' expectations for themselves, much of this "problem" might disappear."

It's food for thought.

Wow, 8 hours is not nearly enough nite sleep for her. I'm guessing you're having to wake her at 6am in order to get her to daycare and you to work? I'd definitely be putting her down earlier. Even as early as 7. I wouldn't schedule her feedings either, but let her tell you when she's hungry.

Definitely. The sooner she goes down the sooner she wakes up. Maybe cut a nap for a day or so that way she will go down sooner. My experience has been that kids normally do not sleep to a certain time but rather sleep the hours that they are use to sleeping. Find out what she sleeps at daycare.
Good Luck!!

You need to read the book Babywise. It will help you get the baby on a good schedule and where he can put himself to sleep. The key is eat, wake time, sleep. Good luck!

Hi T.,

Congratulations on your new love. Sorry to hear she had to go to a daycare. I know how you feel. I have read that children, specially that young should sleep approximately 10 hours. But as we all know, they constantly wake up and pretty much sleep when they need to. It sounds to me like if your baby is sleeping through the night, then you are doing something right. Now the question would be what schedule does the daycare have her on? I would advice if she is getting enough sleep during the day, then you probably have nothing to worry about. At that age, they pretty much let you know if they aren't getting enough sleep. My child use to stay up as late as I did (around 10 p.m.) and got up at 5 or 6 to eat but she slept a lot during the day to make up for the early rise.

Good luck with the daycare. I know your fears and concerns.

If the schedule you are on is working for you then stay like you are. Babies are a creature of habit (figuritively speaking). They thrive off of routine.
For me, I have a 7 1/2 month old that goes to bed between 8- 9pm. Whhether she sleeps all night or not---she gets a bottle at 5:30am. I told her daycare that she's been at since she was 4 months old that if she wants a bottle give it to her because she's been pretty close to consistent on her own. I get a slip of me daughter's daily activity at the end of the day. Her first bottle is between 7:30-8:00am. She now gets solid food which she wants at about 11am. She gets another bottle around 1:30pm. I pick her up around 4:45pm and when we get home I put her down with a bottle that she will doze off to sleep with. I wake her up if she's not already awake by 7pm for dinner. We have bathtime, booktime and then bedtime to follow. We're pretty much the same everyday. It works for us. Go with what you are comfortable with. What works for me or others may not work for you.
Hang in there. Daycare gets easier if you go to a place you love and trust.