"Seeking Advice on Bed Wetting for My 6 Year Old Son"

Try chiropractic! I've worked in the field for 13 years and have seen every kid that came in for bedwetting completely stop doing it within the first few months! Some were after the first visit. Worth a try! It works because Chiropractors work with the spinal column, which houses the nervous system, which controls every function of the body. Good luck!

I so know what you are going though. I have a 9 year old son. He still wets the bed everynight and sometimes will go though 2 pulls a night. I have tired everything. The alarm (did not work for us), 3 different kinds of pills, waking up at night. They say that he will grow out of it, but he does not want to stay the night anywhere. Well I thought of something so that he could go to a friends house without them knowing.
I just tell him to go change in the badroom, and I pack pants that make noises (like nylon pants). The other kids don't know the differents and then I pack a plastic bag in his backpack and in the morning he just puts it in their and then I just throw it away when he gets home. It seems to be working. I know its hard...

Dear L.;
I have a 9 year old who just stopped wetting the bed. I learned that they have no control over it. My first child was completely potty trained at night by 2 but my second one's body was not ready. They say there is a hormone that is produced at night that makes your body shut down the production of urine and in some kids this is not there until later. So you have to be very patient and very supportive. On sleep over's have him wear underjams and teach him to change by himself in the bathroom in the morning. Have him take wipes, a ziploc bag (to but his wet underjams in) and a plastic bag. He can wiped himself and change and put everything in a backpack without anyone knowing. Of course he needs to practice doing this at home with you watching to make sure he knows how to do it. Not that he needs to be ashamaed, it's just that kids will tell other kids and they won't understand that the body has some catching up to do in the growing department. Another thing you can do is to have friends sleep over at your house for a while and that way you can make sure you are there to help. Definitely have him wear underjams or something similar so he has "dry" pjs to wake up to. Keep it all in perspective: he won't be going to college with underjams on. This too shall pass and your attitude is what counts the most. If he understands that his body hasn't produced this hormone yet and that IT WILL in time, then he will be ok if you are ok. If he is a smart boy, if he is otherwise healthy and can walk and run and laugh and talk, that is what matters.

My husband had the same problem and had occasional bedwetting until he was 7. My son, thankfully, is completely potty trained now and he is 3. Anyway, the best advice from him is to try to train your son to hold out during the day and train his bladder to hold longer and more liquid. It was very effective for him and he saw results within a couple weeks.

Good luck!

There is a new product on the market that looks more like boxer shorts than a pull-up. It also comes in larger sizes for the bigger guys who's bladders aren't cooperative.

Maybe his first sleep over can be at his home. This way you can help him take care of any accidents.

Hi L. - I have 4 kids (3 of them boys). It is quite common for children (more common in boys), to have trouble "growing into" their bladders. It's generally a physical issue; not behavioral. My first son had this problem until he was about 10 and it was very frustrating because I did not understand this at the time. If it continues much longer, I would discuss this with your pediatrician. I believe there may be some medical options that could help him with this in the meantime so he's not embarrassed having sleep-overs etc. The good news is, my son is now 23 and he does not wet the bed anymore! :) They do grow out of this!

Hi L.,
I had a similar issue when I was younger. I would sleep so hard, and have a dream that I was going to the bathroom in the bathroom and then I would wake up wet :(
One thing that worked really well for me was visualtion. The doctor would have me visualize getting up and walking into the bathroom when I would have the sensation. It ended up in my subconscious and the problem stopped.
Good luck!
MJ

Hi L.,

I know this can be frustrating for both the parent and the child. You are totally right, when his body is ready, he'll be able to control the bedwetting. Sometimes it just takes the bladder longer in some kids to mature. There's some evidence that this may be a genetic thing...if a parent hsd this problem as a child, then a child may have this problem as well.

About the sleepovers, I have two thoughts. First of all, would it possible for your son to put the pull up on BEFORE the kids arrive? This way, maybe the kids won't notice that he's wearing one. I think there is a brand of pullups that is designed specifically for the older child, and is designed to not be so obvious when worn. I don't remember the brand, but I want to say it's Goodnites, or something like that.

Second, you may have done this already, but maybe you could ask your son for ideas about what could be done to help him with this problem. Oftentimes, kids have some great ideas for how to handle embarrassing problems like this. You said that you'd like to help him get more confidence in controlling his body...and asking for his ideas and then following through is step in the right direction. It's his body after all, and he should be included in solving problems.

I think you're headed in the right direction...the more pressure you put on him, the harder it is for him to feel in control. It's great that you're backing off and not putting pressure on him. Good job mom!

One other thought, you may want to chat with is pediatrician about this. His doctor may have other ideas about how to handle this.

Also, this will eventually pass, so remember to breathe, and do your best in supporting your son. You're doing a great job so far, so kudos to you!

M.

Hi L.! \''/

I think it's real simple. I always got my kids up out of their sleep and took them to the bathroom. There's no other way around it. You gotta do what's necessary. My kids had a few accidents in bed, but the kids will grow out of it eventually. Consistency is the key, just be patient and stick with it. I know it may be tiresome, but you have to stick with it.

Even though your child may go to the bathroom before just before bedtime, I think it is wise to get them out of bed (always with your assistance, remember they are still in sleep mode) and make sure that they urinate. He'll grow out of it.

Also, I've known some people to have small bladders, so they have to urinate quite frequently. So, keep that in mind too. But don't ever withhold any water from him though....cause water is very important to his body.

My youngest is 12 now and from what I remember, I would get her up approximately 4 hours after she's fell asleep. You be the judge of when to get your son up. Even if you have to set your alarm clock, be sure to get him up. It will all work out for you and you won't have to do so much washing during the night, or the next day. I remember when I was working with kids (years ago) and we had to take the little ones every 30 minutes to go to the bathroom. So, maybe every 30 or 45 minutes ask him if he needs to use the restroom. It's your call.

Good luck with everything.\''/

I had bedwetting issues until I was 16 years old. After countless testing as a child the Dr told mom that there were no medical issues causing my bedwetting and that I was just lazy and refused to get up and go. This was said with me present and no matter how much I tried to inform otherwise he was the Dr. So a bad situation became extremely worse. I won't go into it any further than to say I was abused on many levels and it only got worse over the years and the doctors never addressed.
My eldest son also had a bedwetting issue as well as had a few day time accidents. I found out that his father had wetting as well as bowel issues. When my son was 4 and in headstart his dad went off the handle one day about the bed wetting. He was yelling at my son and being cruel. I wasn't having that. I informed him that since he didn't change his bed, do the laundry, or bathe the child and obviously had his own issues with the situation to back off and i would work with him. He never said a word to my son again about accidents or bedwetting.
I worked with my son and together we found ways to cope until his body triggers caught up. I always made sure he had spare bedding and pajamas so he could take care of himself should he wake wet. He volunteered to make sure his wet clothes and bedding were by the washer for cleaning. He never had an issue that I am aware of about staying with or having friends over night. His friends didn't seem to mind and he found some of them had issues also. I'm glad his issue resolved a lot earlier than mine did. Although he had a much more stable environment than I did.
You are doing right. Supporting him and helping him to cope and understand his body will start behaving once those triggers have developed. You sound like there is excellent communication between the two of you. You also have an understanding of the issue and are making this a positive rather than negative. See what his thoughts are and go with that. Support goes a long way. Wow, you are a very busy person. We to tried everything. Once we just let things take their course all was better and we have success. Talking to my son he says he was 11 or 12 before he stopped. Good luck and keep things positive.

Hi L.,

I would suggest taking him to see an acupuncturist who is trained (has a master's degree) in Herbs. There is a pattern in Acupuncture that can cause the body to unable to hold fluids up in the body...and it is quite possible that your son has a slight deficiency causing incontinence. I would really encourage you to look into this as he may not be able to help it since he is already 6 years old. I have some friends who's son was 7 and in your son's same position ...he was too afraid to go to sleepovers and they just didnt know what to do after trying everything. Acupuncture helped A LOT. You can always check out the student clinic in Portland at the Oregon College of Oriental Medicine...its cheaper there and the students are supervised by very good instructors.

I do foster care and a large portion of the children I get wet the bed. We teach them how to take care of it and that it is not a terrible thing. We go over the fact that many children have this problem and they almost all grow out of it. We teach them by age seven how to do the laundry(with supervision, of course) help them learn how to make their bed. We teach them that it is only a problem if they are not taught how to handle taking care of it. Showers daily, keeping fresh pajamas, slowing down on liquids after 5PM, making sure they go potty before they go to bed and maybe again before they fall asleep. Sleepovers can be a problem but they can go into a bathroom alone to get their pj's on and again when they wake up. Send them with a small plastic bag to put the wet pull-up in and then directly into their overnight bag. Wipes to wipe themselves down with since showers are not always available. Most of the kids in our house become very comfortable after a bit and realize it should not lower their self-esteem if handled correctly. I.

Well,I don't know that I have much more to offer except 'you are not alone'. I had a daughter and have a son who have dealt with this for years. I would get very frustrated until my husband said he went through this, as well as a couple of his siblings. So I had to ask him to help w/this. My attitude would get ugly... especially with my older girl as it created mounds of laundry and w/7 children I resented more work. Then I realized that it 'usually' happened when they were very tired. An earlier bedtime... regularly, helped the accidents happen less frequently. It was as if they would go to bed exhausted and then not wake up when their body told them to. And often when they were proud they had stayed dry for so long then wham, it happened again. They only allow themselves to sleep lightly instead of soundly. This in turn affects their daytime behavior and makes them edgy or difficult or depressed.
So everything you can do to keep them comfortable, mattress covers, simple bedcovers, pullup as large as possible so they don't leak... Is what I recommend. Also allow them to be part of the clean up... not negatively, but so they are a part of the solution if it is emotional. My daughter was 13 I believe, before she could wake herself to use the bathroom and my now 14 year old son occassionally still has a problem with this. Many kids have this problem. So find a box of 'chucks' and have them come spend the night too. :) Such is life.
Don't you know that it all ends up coming down to pee and poo when you are a mom. heehee. I wouldn't have believed that when i was young and in love and first married. But once you have babies, well such is life. I remember the first time my oldest son texted me while i was watching his son and it said... Did Gage poop today? heehee... Cracked me up to hear that from him. Body funtions, aren't they grand. So anyway, it is probably a long haul... A good Attitude and all you can do to make him comfortable is the best way of dealing with it. It is a life long trauma otherwise. How would you want to be treated... and how do you want them to treat you when you are 80 and incontinent for years? Blessings and God's strength to you.

My son wet the bed until 7.5 years old. We talked with a urologist about it at age 5 since we were seeing him for other issues with our son. The doctor said it could be continue until his pre-teen years. We were lucky it didn't last that long. We tried many methods to help but the absolute winner was taking him potty 2-3 hours after he went to sleep. We would walk him to the bathroom just before we go to bed. This brought us down to an accident a month on average. The reason this works is because the urologist told us the body produces the most urine in the first 2-3 hours of your sleep. Once you've emptied that, it's much easier to make it through the night. For sleepovers, I would know the other mom well enough to ask her to walk our son to the bathroom the same way we do.

I used a bedwetting alarm for my 8 yr old son and it trained him in a month and he has been dry now for 6 months, Prior to that he ad NEVER been dry no matter what we did, It was expensive but very worth it, I used the malen brand. Good luck to you

What has worked for us with both our children, is to take them up to go potty when we go to bed. That way, whatever is still in the bladder, will not have to stay in there all night, to maybe cause an accident.

Good luck!

I know to many chiropractic seems crazy; I use to think so myself until it was my last resort in fixing my daughters health problems, asthma, ear infx, pneumonia, headaches, and bathroom probs. One of two things, has his bladder been checked as far as the connection between bladder and brain, communicating okay, (had a friend whose daughter had this prob) and two, chiropractic care is completely harmless, safe, and involves making sure that his low back is moving as it should and not entrapping any nerves from his spinal cord that communicate with the brain and in turn reducing the signals back and forth that its time to use the bathroom...If you have any other questions, about chiro, feel free to ask me, chiro saved my daughters life in so many ways that I did a complete career change and have been working in different offices for 8 years!

I have a friend in the health care profession who thought her son would never stop wetting the bed. She ended up giving him anti bed wetting medication (don't know the name of it) for 9 months.
Her son would fall into a deep sleep and just couldn't wake up to "go". The medication kept him in a lighter sleep, so he was able to wake when he needed to use the restroom. I was skeptical, seems like he wouldn't get enough quality sleep, but she said he was fine and hasn't wet the bed since. This was 20 or 30 years ago, so I imagine they've seriously improved the medicine by now.
I know medication is the last thing most parents want to reach for, and I don't know much about it, but it is an option to check out. It seemed to work great for her.

You already have some great advice...normal, overnight pull ups, chiro etc. One more thing to check into w/ the Ped is narcolepsy. My sister has this and also wet the bed until about 6 or 8. Her son, now 6 does the same thing. Soaks through pull ups and bedding nightly. My mom has encouraged her to check into it. She struggled w/narcolepsy until she was finally diagnosed in her late teens as a college student. Her life (and ours) would have been much easier if "we knew then, what we know now". Hind sight is one thing, but if you can rule that out now, it will really help those teen years.

when my daughter had the problem we resorted to a nasal spray DDAVP which was successful until she grew out of the problem. You should consult a physician and do some research, as to weather there have been any health risks associated. It was probably 15 years ago we used it. It helped reduce the amount of urine produced at night so that she was able to make it through the night.

I have heard great success with the night alarm that clips in their underwear.