Seeking Advice on Dealing with Stress

The best way to deal with this sort of stress is to find other women with childen to hang out with. I use to be stressed out a lot more than I am now b/f i started getting out and doing things. Know I try to get out of the house to do something as much as possible. It makes the day go by ten times faster, especially if you go to a freinds house who has children to play. We usually go somewhere play, eat lunch, and than come home for nap time. That way the children get to play and you have adult conversation as well. Everybody wins.

K., I am sorry to hear about your stress. I think EVERY mother has some form of it no matter what the child's age. Well, I am a stay at home mom and my hubby works almost every nite till 9am so basically I do it ALL and on top of it, he has autism so throw in extra stuff in addition to preschool, and therepy etc. My family says they'll help and it's just lip service and I get really down. I got medication to help me and what I do is when he is bed, I go online, when he is in school I do all my shopping and chores. BUT on weekends when dad is home I get the HELL OUT...............LOL
I see my friends about once a month, see a movie or get a manicure.
It's vital, you wonder why people crack and hurt children (news reports daily and quite sad) but it's hard to be mom.

((HUGS))
N.

K.,
I can relate to your feelings. My son is 19 months old and he's definitely a busy body. I have two other children who are much older so they have helped to spoil Tyler. You could probably find a playgroup that is close to you for you and the boys to participate with. Tyler and I go to playgroup every Thursday and when we walk in he walks away from mommy to play with all the toys and other kids. By the time we leave (only 1 hr) he is pretty tired. We go home for lunch or might stop and get something to eat. After lunch he falls asleep. You could try to google/yahoo playgroups and see what comes up in your area. No luck? Start one of your own. The one we go to is at our Youth Center on base, but there are others close by us. Check some of the technical schools and community centers around you.

I wish you luck sweetie!! Just know that you are not alone in this.

I also agree with some of the other ladies when they say you need some YOU time. Every weekend I try to find something for ME to do. Most of the time my daughter, who's 15, will tag along with me and that's fine. But I leave the boys home with my husband and am gone most of the day. I also have a home business that allows me to get out and meet new people. This is also considered as "Mommy's Time!"

K.,

The thing I do for stress is work out. I go to the SportandHealth gym where they have an amazing kidzone. My daughter loves to go and she gets to have a great time interacting with other children and I get some me time to work out my frustrations. I am currently going through a very painful divorce and honestly if I didn't have the gym I would go nuts.

I know working out isn't for everyone, but you would really be surprised at how you feel and also how you look. There is a two hour time limit-just think of what those two hours could eventually mean to you.

I hope this helps.

K.

Sounds like you need some stuff for YOU. Been there. Oh yes. Try meetup.com and find (or start) a local mom's group. Find someone to watch the kids and go get a massage - that not only helps with your emotional/mental state by affecting the levels of stress hormones and your brain waves but is physically really good for your health. Call around and find a someone who will work at the price you can afford, or is willing to barter.

hi K., my name is M., i drive school bus for me local school district so stress is pretty much my middle name. i have 1 daughter who is 10 and very active in things so she keeps me hopping. i was going through a tough time with my step daughter when she lived with us and didn't want to go on anything that would wack me out that i wasn;t with it so my doctor suggested taking a B vitiman. I went to GNC and they suggested taking the Big 100, which is a combination of all the B vitimans. That was 4 yrs ago and i'm still taking them and they really help. I also journal my feelings and that seems to help too. good luck with everything.

I thought after my daughter was about 3 months old that the stress and depression I was feeling was post partum, but was just diagnosed with Bipolar II, because of the stress I was feeling I was having trouble dealing with my daughter who is now 7 months old and very moody. The best thing I can tell you would be to see if there are any family members or friends who live close by that can come over and help you with your son on the days you are feeling extra stressed. For me having someone watch my daughter for even 10 minutes so I could step away and take a breather helped me. See if you can arrange that even if its only once or twice a week, it makes a very big difference. For the days when things are especially stressful for you see if oyu can line someone up who you can call who is close enough that they can come over as soon as possible. Try it and let me know how it works. Good luck.

Find something to do that's just for you. You should have one activity a week at least where you get to go do it without your family. Your husband should be able to handle this. If it's yoga, knitting, a book club, walking, or whatever, you need time for you!

Hi Im a 27 year old mom of 1 child I work about 20 hours a week and am also havings some depression and axiety problems due to some personal things that me and my fiance are going threw. I have bought a medition cd called acient voices. First thing in the morning before anyone gets up I listen to it for 12-20 min and also during the afternoon when I put my son down (or if im woking that day after work). That helps with stress and axiety. As far as depression Im taking Celexa which his changed my life I had postpartum depression REALLY bad after having Dylan. I cried all the time and felt hopeless. Since starting the meditation and anit-depressant I fell a hell of alot better!

Getting out of the house periodically is helpful....both alone and with the kids. Sometimes I find getting out of the house - even just going to the mall to let them run around for an hour in the play area - can make a huge difference for all of us on the worse days. You feel like getting out of the house is going to send you through the roof, but once out, it helps me gain perspective and relax a bit. You can't go out expecting to run errands or really get anything done, but just getting all of you get a change of scenery and if possible, let the kids run around and burn off steam. Afterwards, mine are usually more mellow and are ready to take nice naps which gives you a period of time to chill out in peace at home.

Our family had a couple crazy weeks and were feeling crazed. We dropped the kids off to grandma for maybe 1-2 hours and went to Panera for a quick quiet dinner. It was grown up food, quiet, and it did wonders for our sanity. Even though it was a short time, it helped greatly. It was during one of those crazy cold spells and we hadn't been going out of the house unless necessary so the kids really benefitted from getting out of our house as well and playing at grandma's house.

K., you're tired, goes without saying. But you might be dealing with postpartum as well. Also, at that age 4 and 1 are still tough to handle, so I suggest you create some you time on weekends, hubby or whomever needs to watch the kids for a few hours while you go and get coffee and spend some time by yourself.
good luck
vlora