Seeking Advice on Food Issues

Updated on February 08, 2007
F.S. asks from Buffalo, NY
8 answers

My 2 year old daughter won't eat no matter what we try. All she wants to do is breastfeed. I have been trying to do child led weaning but even her doctor says I need to stop but I don't know how. I know I was very picky when I was her age but she won't even try things. I have tried to go with out nursing thinking she'll eat when she's hungry but I can't stand to hear her cry and try to lift up my shirt. If any other moms have or had this kind of problem could you please tell me how you solved it. Thanks

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M.S.

answers from New York on

Hi F., I feel your pain, my daughter stopped nursing at 2 1/2 years and it was a fight. I tried everything from sleeping in another room to putting bitter stuff on my nipples and they didn't work. What worked eventually, I sent her away for 7 days (she was with my sister whom she liked and was used to), when she came back she was drinking from a cup and only took her bottle when she was going to bed. My sister has two older boys 12 and 16 and she was their shadow.

I don't know if you are able to do this, if you can, give it a try. It won't be easy but it's a try.

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A.C.

answers from Syracuse on

please email my friend at ____@____.com she is not in the group but has valuable info for you

C.S.

answers from New York on

Well, my son wasnt nursing when he was 2. I give you tons of credit for keeping up with it so long. I will tell you that when he turned 2 he was a TERRIBLE eater. He wouldnt eat anything except for the marshmallows out of Lucky Charms cereal. He grew out of it, and he eats lots of things now. Hopefully this is just a phase your daughter is going through. Good Luck!

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B.L.

answers from New York on

At least your daughter is breastfeeding! Very often children who refuse to eat have allergies or food sensitivities so instinctually avoid many foods. There's nothing wrong with nursing in fact she continues to receive some good nutrition and definitely immune protection. The other possibility is that your daughter has some difficulty with textures and certain foods may cause gagging or be difficult to swallow. You could offer her a variety of healthy foods for her to eat at will and not make an issue of her eating but allow her to continue to nurse. And why would weaning help? Then she'd have nothing to eat-right? Is her weight all right? Is she anemic? Perhaps if you contact La Leche League and see if someone there can help and/or refer you to a breastfeeding knowledgeable nutritionist and someone who could test your daughter for allergy. There is a non invasive type of allergy testing called kinisthetic testing which could be helpful in identifying allergies/sensitivities. Hope this helps, and know you're doing the right thing by continuing to nurse. A two yr old is meant to nurse; the norm for our species is weaning between the ages of 2 1/2-7 yrs; worldwide average weaning age is 4.2 yr.

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D.R.

answers from New York on

hi F., im sorry i dont have much good advice on getting her to eat more, both of my kids ate great when we started solids (though my son is a very picky toddler now, i think its just something they go through), but i did want to say that if you want to keep nursing her, keep nursing her! even more so since she wont eat, at least she is getting excellent nutrition from you. if my doc told me to stop nursing when we werent ready, i would tell that doc to go scratch! find another doc who will actually think and come up with another solution that fits YOU. that said, if you ARE ready to stop nursing, having your daughter sleep out can work. my son was ready at the same time we were ready to get pregnant again, we were down to twice a day and when i stopped offering he forgot all about it, but my daughter was a different story, i WAS pregnant and had to stop, and she wasnt really ready, so i weaned her down to just at night, then she slept over grandmas for a night and it went a lot easier. both times broke my heart, i went through more withdrawal than either of them! do what feels right to you in terms of the nursing, and best of luck with the eating, i really think they are 2 separate issues. take care, D.

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K.B.

answers from New York on

Most 2 year olds are picky eaters anyway. My kids are good very good eaters but they went through the periods of not eating or only eating certain foods at certain times. My suggestion would be to go cold turkey. Let her "graze" on foods throughout the day (leaving finger foods, cereal, fruit, cereal bars, etc). Try leaving the food on a tray within reach. SHe just might start snacking by herself without even realizing it. I know it's difficult, but she will not starve!!! She will eat when hungry and most importantly be consistent with your decision. Best of luck!
Kelley

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C.A.

answers from New York on

I really don't have any advice to give you about the feeding issue, except I believe in time she will eat. I just wanted to say that you should proud that you've nursed your daughter this long. Nursing isn't all about nutrition, maybe your daughter is nursing to be around you and be comforted. Your doctor should be ashamed of him/her self for suggesting weaning. I do not belive that your daughter will increase her food intake if you stop nursing. They need to nurse as toddlers, it helps so very much. I would consult yoiur local laleceh league. They have great advice on nursing toddlers.

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L.O.

answers from New York on

Hi F.,

Many children this age are getting most of their nutrients from breast milk. And your milk is nutrient dense. She will eat. Sometimes pushing he away may make her fight harder. Where do you live?
There is a monthly La Leche League Meeting especialy for Toddlers the third Friday of each month at Realbirth - 54 West 22nd Street -2nd floor, 10:30-12:00.

Your daughter will wean and she will eat more food - she is trusting her body.

L.

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