This is a work related question? I am seeking more time with my children through the courts. My ex now wants me to sign a sheet showing what time i picked up the children and when dropped off. A coworker says not to do it. I dont understand why because it would give a accurate view of how many hours i spend w/ the children when we go to court and would give a accurate view of how many hours he does. Given i would have him do the same thing. She states he could lie and alter the receipts but is said they would get a copy each time so there really could be no alterations. So if any ideas please we would love to hear any experiences that are similar with a sign in /out sheet and any legal advice rearding the same.
I would not sign anything and if you do then a copy would be made and notarized with both of you present and signing it together. Otherwise, forget it!
This is a snide attempt at something sneaky for sure. The question is; why would he want documentation that would prove you care for the kids?
No one makes you sign something unless they are;
1. Making sure they have verification of something THEY did correctly.
2. Making sure they catch a mistake YOU have made.
Neither of these are for your benefit. I would not do it. What will happen is he will promise to provide what you have signed, and suddenly it will be lost or damaged, and then you get to court and it shows you leaving the kids with him for 24 hours, making you neglectful and possibly face a charge of abandonment. Even IF the sign in sheet is legit, you face also him saying that you can not make more time with the children that you are asking for more time with, look! And there is the sign up sheet. Because it is on paper it doesn't show the 30 or so minute drive to go see or pick them up, or the flat tire you got, or the flu you had, so you were unable to go. All it will show, is that you did not come, or you were late, etc.
He wants the sheet to make you look bad. There is no other reason he would need it. Parents who are working together for their children speak to each other, and work like adults toward a solution and a plan. Parents who work against each other want paperwork, and proof. Do not do it. See a lawyer. When you refuse, he will fight back, and it will not be fair.
Please ask a good family law lawyer! Why aren't you asking this of a lawyer or even checking it with the court? This could be a good idea or it could be a terrible one. I would seriously question why your ex wants this done; does it give him some advantage, or does he plan to use these "receipts" later somehow? To show that you were late X times, for instance, so he can use that against you in court?
You do not give us any context about whether your relationship with your ex, but if you are going to court to seek more time with your kids, and he's asking for written records like this, I imagine your relationship as exes is poor and has some suspicion in it.
Please, get LEGAL advice on this before you say yes to anything.It may be a perfectly normal thing or it may be something that he could twist to use against you later, but the only advice to follow is legal advice.
If it isn't required in the divorce agreement, it isn't required and you have no reason to do it. I would refuse to sign anything.
However, I would wonder why he is trying to compile discriminatory documentation against you.
Do you have a history of being late? Cancelling? Breaking promises? If so, please consider getting more organized so you are consistently on time, don't cancel, and aren't breaking visitation promises to your children or ex.
Even if you don't sign anything, he can still start keeping a journal of when you arrive, depart, and what you discuss with him...which is fully admissable in court.
Best of luck,
C.
Get legal advice first . . . from someone competent, qualified, and licensed to practice in your state.
He's using you. Don't sign anything. Your gut is telling you something is fishy about this, that's why you posted, right? So even if you can't figure out why this doesn't seem right, trust your gut. Protect yourself. Don't sign.
Don't sign anything and don't ask your former husband to sign anything. There is a court order, so ALL you need to do is document when and if the children's father violates the court ordered visitation.
Keep and already ugly situation SIMPLE for the good of your children.
Blessings......
I don't know if it would matter in court, but I also don't see the point of it. It sounds like he may have sneaky reason for asking this. Go with your gut.
Do not agree to do this or sign anything he wants unless your lawyer advises it AND the court orders you to do it. You do NOT have to do it just because he says so. Well, not unless it's in the court ordered custody arrangement or in an agreement that you signed and was approved by the court.
You and your child's other parent ought to be keeping your own documentation regardless. That doesn't mean that you have to sign each other's documentation. And honestly, it just sounds like a trap to me.
I don't get why he wants the form. If my DH's ex had the kids, it didn't make much difference if it was 7PM or 9PM. If they slept at her house, that was 1 overnight and I think it was 180 overnights was the tipping point in custody. What's his point? What is he trying to prove? That you never see your kids? He's up to something.
I think this is something where you need to speak to your lawyer and find out what the determining factor is in your state. You can ask the lawyer if something like http://parentingtime.net/ would benefit YOU.
I also agree with Christy. Lack of a sign out sheet didn't keep us from noting "On May 5th, the children were significantly late and dropped off at 10PM on a school night." The CO shows that they were supposed to be returned by 6PM. We never took it to court, but if we had to, we had documentation.
Talk to a lawyer. There may be something that exists where time can be tracked. Heck, there might even be an App for it.
You're too trusting. Believe me, he has motives for doing this, that benefit him, and not you.
I would not do this. unless it is court ordered.
