Seperation Anxiety? - Evansville, IN

I would try exposing her strangers with you for now. Let her get used to other people while safely with you. Invite friends over, take her to play groups, take her out to the store as much as you can. Let her interact with strangers first while you're holding her, then try letting them hold her for a minute or two, increasing it a little at a time. Explain to people that she is wary of strangers and that you'retrying to help her overcome that fear, so the expect crying and also understand what you're doing. In the end though, I wouldn't push it for now. She does seem young to have separation anxiety, but from you described that sounds like it, although most kids stop crying a few minutes after Mom leaves. Maybe this means it will be short lived. You know, intense but short rather than somewhat mild but drawn out. Hang in there!

M.

My son, 6 months old, use to be the same way. I think having someone come in for an hour or two every day would be great for her. You might be surprised how well she will adjusts.

Hi K.,

My Daughter is 5 months. When she was about 3 1/2 to 4 months she also did this hysterical crying! It was almost like she was scared of something. Especially when someone beside my husband or I would hold her. She would not allow them to hold her at all. Now she is fine and will smile at everyone. I think it is just a phase. At this age they are more aware of there surroundings and there sense are very intuned. So they can be extra senstive and can easily get over stimulated. We would also hold her before handing her over to someone so she can still see us. When taking her somewhere we would make sure we woke her up in the van so she wouldn't be as nervous when going in to somewhere. When we saw the first sign (her lip coming out) we knew she was going to start crying so we would as who ever was holding her to hand her back before the explosion!! Hang in there it should past!

K.

Are you the only one home with her? I would have the sitter come over to the house with you there, let her get comfortable with the sitter, at first stay next to her, thne like move so she can still see you, then eventually into another room, and so fourth. Most babies will go through this, becuase mom spends the most time with them, it is just a matter of letting her see she can trust others. Start slow, Hope this helps

Babies go through that at 4 months 6 months and 8-12 months. It is normal. Stranger Anxiety. They want and know mama. you have to give her time away from you so that she can learn to trust others. Like daddy and gma and daycare worker. You just have to give it time. She will get over it. It is just a phase. it will pass.

My little girl also had stranger anxiety very early (starting around 3 months). The doctor suggested the following: to get her used to someone new, have them sit and talk to you for a while and not even look at her. That gives her a chance to check them out. Then, they should approach her with a familiar toy or stuffed animal. That way, she'll focus on the toy and the new person will be associated with something familiar. Take it slow and she will eventually be comfortable.

I know it sounds like a lot, but it's the only way we could introduce new people without our little one shrieking. And, once she associated that person with being upset, it took even longer for her to get comfortable with them.

I found that for occasions where there were going to be a lot of people at once, it was easier for me to hold her and let others talk to her while she was in my arms. That way, she knew that I was right there and could always bury her head (which she sometimes did!) if she wanted to. Just explain to the family that she has stranger anxiety and they will hopefully understand.

Happily, my little one is now 11 months old and we just had a family reunion and she didn't freak out at all. She probably lost the stranger anxiety a long time ago, but this was the first time she's been around LOTS (30+) people who all wanted her attention!

Best of luck and feel free to e-mail me if you want to talk more.

-K.

With my family in a different state altogether, the way I found with my first two is keeping pictures of family around for them to see everyday. This way they are more familiar to the faces. Also I agree with staying home with the babysitter a few times to get her use to her, and not passing her off to grandparents right away is right on coarse too. I hug my family with my baby in my arms a lot, so they felt more comfortable. Your baby is just going to be extremely shy when she gets older, and thats not a bad thing. Being in day care isnt going to necessarily change that, so I wouldnt worry. I have had one in day care and one not in day care, and both are shy around strangers, but love their grandparents they see only once a month to pieces!! Good Luck!!

Honestly, I don't think exposing her to babysitters/strangers will help. My little lady is about 5 1/2 mo. now and she started doing the same thing at 4 mo. old. She even cried and screamed with grandparents held her. What helped? Don't hand her over to them right away. I always kept Kelsey in my arms and exposed her just to the environment and the people she would be around. I kept her for an hour or so before handing her off to family. Meanwhile, make sure while you have her that your family takes the time to come up and talk to her, touch her, smile, etc. While in your arms she'll be comfortable with that, and after she sees that mommy is ok with "these people" then she will be too! I know exactly how you feel and it can be hard on the grandparents, but she'll warm up. :)

Hey K.,
I know exactly what you are going through my youngest son was a premie and all he wanted was his mommy. Whenever i needed to take a shower or leave the house i would give the babysitter the shirt i was wearing before my shower and she would drape it over her shoulder or across her lap and my son never knew that it wasn't mommy holding him.
I hope it works for you!!!
S.