Silly Sleeping Question for Toddler (Once Again!!)

My 2 1/2 year old use to be very regular with an 8pm bed time and a 2pm nap time for 1-2 hours. Over the past couple months, she plays in her room, but won't actually sleep at nap time. And on the days she did, she didn't want to go to bed at 8. So now, we just have quiet time in the afternoon (usually no TV, just quiet play) instead. Or if we need to, we run errands and go all day (Every once in a while, she will fall asleep in her car seat in the afternoon while running errands.) BUT, she still sleeps all night. Which is great.

Maybe your son is ready for shorter naps (you may need to wake him up), or an every other day nap or an as needed nap.

I hope this helps. You're not alone!

Welcome to toddlerhood, dear. As a child approaches the second birthday, his/her sole desire is to control the universe, one parent at a time.
Granted, cutting the 2 yr molars is hard and painful work, but motrin/advil should solve that problem.
Refusal to go to bed is simply an act of gaining control.
At 2, he still needs an afternoon nap. Napping really shouldn't be an option until about 3 1/2. Even then, you should still enforce a "rest time" in the middle of the day.
Also, at this point, if he's staying up way late, he's missing some good sleep, even though he's waking up later.

I would begin by backing the bed time up to 8:00, and I would not, under any circumstances take him out of his crib after you've put him to bed. When our son hit this point a few months ago, we did concede the fact that we can't make him sleep, but we can make him stay in his room. So, we let him have a bedside lamp on, and gave him a few board books or a toy to play with. The Leapfrog "Baby tad" is good for this. anyway, we put him to bed with the regular routine, gave him his blanket and let him wind down with his books or toy. Then we established a "lights out" time about 10-20 min afterwards.

It does become difficult for kids this age to settle down and sleep if there's still activity in the rest of the house that he thinks he's missing out on. So, we have made it a habit to turn off all the surrounding lights -- hall, bathroom, etc. (anything that would cast light into his room), and stay at the other end of the house for a while (load the dishwasher, work at the computer, chat about our days, etc.).
Yes, he cried at first, but no amount of crying should get him out of his crib. We would go in and comfort him, but bed time is crib time, end of story.
Now he stays in his room after bed time and is generally asleep with his board books on top of him before I can get back in there for lights out.

We've had the same problem with my 2.5yo and what we've found that seems to help the most, is just making sure his naptime ends by 3p. He used to sleep 1p-3p pretty consistently and bedtime at 8, waking by 7:30am. Sometimes he would go down later than 1p and want to sleep past 3p. I've always been a firm believer of "never wake a sleeping baby", but after several nights of not going to sleep until 1am one night, 10pm the next and so on, I decided to start waking up the sleeping baby. I've actually set my alarm to be louder now and it goes off at 7:30. It's the music and I let it run so it wakes him up (he's down the hall). So, up at 7:30am and then up at 3p for nap. Doesn't matter when he goes down or how long he's slept. Seems to have helped quite a bit.

Just a suggestion, but I would say "yes" to trying an earlier bed-time. My 22 month son goes down at 7:00 and sleeps until 7:00. He naps for 1.5 - 2.5 hours every day around noon/1:00. We just recently moved his bed-time up to 7:00 from 6:30. I think the better rested they are, the better they sleep.

My way to get kids to sleep is use up their energy. Wear them out. Be it crying or playing hard then patty on the back or rubbing softly,a warm bath also makes one sleepy. Make sure the tummy is full and there is nothing wrong. I have a 4 mo old in my Day Car who is fighting sleep and looks to see if I am going to pick him up. I remove myself from that room and let him wear himself out. He usually wears down in a half hour.Mom said he cried in the middle of the night for 2 hours and dad can not stand to let him cry at all. So if 30 mins goes by and he is not asleep I will then go and rock him. Crying is really good for us all. It is a normal emotion that is needed in stress or hurt and pain but also being spoiled is not that great that they control you. You have to be in charge.

Definitely back the bedtime up. It also depends on the time he takes naps. If he is napping by 12:30 or 1PM and up by 2:30-3PM at the latest, he should be ready for bed by 7:45 for sure. I wouldn't put him down past 8. They do get overtired and fight it. Him not waking until 9AM is a sign that he is exhausted. our son is 27 months old and has started to fuss...usually just because he "thinks" he is not ready for bed. He pulls out all the stops now...oh, I have to go to the bathroom, I need to be tucked in again, etc. We entertain him for about ten minutes...then, we tell him that's the last time we are coming in and he usually fusses for five or ten minutes or talks to himself and goes down. Don't get in the habit of letting him up...it will ge impossible to break after awhile. Much better to let him cry it out now than at four or five...when he doesn't have a crib to keep him in! Try an hour and a half nap a little earlier...not past 1PM, then poop him out. By 7:30P he'll be ready to go down.

Welcome to the two year old group of none sleepers. My son did the same thing. It takes us forever to get him to sleep and using the same routine since he was a baby still didn't work. But now he has givin up his nap but I still require he has some quiet time and some mommy sanity time and now goes to bed with out a fight around 9 and then gets up at 8. The only problem we still have is him getting up once in the middle of the night. I can deal with that it's the actually getting an hour or so with my husband that I enjoy. So we are now working on the approach to not get up in the middle of the night. So I think it's what ever works for you and your family.

K.,

Around the time they hit two, thej are ready for a shorter nap. I think you said 2 1/2 hour which is perfect up to this age. Knock it down to a STRICT 2 hours, and moniter how it goes. Do not put it any less then 1 1/2 hours. Haylee was a most excellent sleeper, and I went through the exact same thing. Finally cut down her nap time and the routine fell right back in place. She has now just turned 4 and her nap is between 45 minutes to an 1 1/2 depending on how worn down she has gotten during the day, still with a perfect bedtime of 9 p.m. Just toy with it, and try not to let yourself stress over it. Every one is different. He has done his job to show you that the routine needs adjustments, now you just need to adjust to him!!!! Hope this helps!!

Hey K.,,

Have you read the book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child? It's awesome, I would highly recommend you get a copy. I read it each and every day when the boys were newborns. It talks a lot about these types of sleep issues. It talks a lot about good sleep at the right times.

Jack usually naps about 2 and 1/2 to 3 hours then goes to bed by 8:30 at the latest. Every kid is different and has different routines, but I think this book could help you with sleep times during the day.

Good luck!
C.