I have a freind on myspace that losed a baby 5months ago and my sister lose 5 babys and they let balloons go and lite a candle. Here is a list that was put on this site that I go to.
* Have someone who is a friend or family member stay at the house at least for the first couple of weeks (maybe on a rotation basis).
* If there are other children, help take care of them, take them out with you for a few hours, etc.
* If there are pets, take them for walks, take care of feeding them, etc.
* Cook meals or bring prepared meals by the house. Bring extra meals so they can be frozen for later consumption.
* Clean the house, mow the lawn, etc.
* Offer to go grocery shopping.
* Grief will make you lose your appetite so make sure that mom is eating as much as she can.
* Help draft up an email to family and friends to announce the loss of the baby.
* Help her pick out birth/death announcement cards to send out to close family and friends.
* Help her write out the obituary.
* Keep track of those who send flowers and gifts.
* Offer to buy thank you cards and help her write them out.
* Help her pick out an urn or burial plot.
* Help her pick out music for the funeral.
* If the parents wish to write a letter to their child, offer to read it for them at the funeral.
* Help her take down the nursery (don't pressure her to do this immediately, just when she's ready).
* Help her pick out a special jewelry item (ie, necklace) to memorialize her baby.
* If applicable, help her file for Short Term disability at her work (This benefit guarantees that you will not lose your job while you recover from the birth of your child and covers a portion of your salary. Coverage usually begins after 1 year of service and pays 60% of an individual's weekly wages up to a maximum benefit payment of $7,500 per month. Six weeks is the standard number of weeks that you can take for a pregnancy but you may be able to take additional time off if you use vacation time).
* Help her obtain the hospital records (for future pregnancies). Note that if the baby lived for any amount of time, you may be required to show a birth and/or death certificate. Check with the hospital for their requirements.
* If the child lived for any amount of time, help her obtain the death certificate and Social Security card. Death certificates can be obtained at the vital records office in the county where the baby died.
* Assist with filing for life insurance (if the parents had a policy and the baby lived for any amount of time). You will need a copy of the death certificate.
* Help arrange for hotel accomodations for family and friends coming out of town.
* Offer to pick up family and friends from the airport.
* Help her unsubscribe to baby-related magazines, mail, or phone calls that she may receive by writing to:
Mailing Preference Service
PO Box 9008
Farmingdale, NY 11735
For telephone solicitation removal:
Mailing Preference Service- Phone Preference
PO Box 9014
Farmingdale, NY 11735
* Accompany her to the post-op OB/GYN appointments for support (she may wish to wait in the car until the doctor is ready to see her since seeing pregnant women or infants can be upsetting).
* Offer to refill any prescriptions for her at the pharmacy.
* Help her keep track of when she has taken her medications and make sure that she is taking them.
* Help her find a grief counselor in her area if she thinks that she needs one.
* Help her find an online support group if she thinks that she needs one.
* Help the couple make sure that their financial obligations (ie, mortgage, utilities, etc.) are still being met.
* Don't forget to also offer support to the father (they are usually forgotten since everyone focuses on the mother.)
Hope this helps a little bit.