Stopping Breastfeeding!!

I have a 20m old son nursing. I just finished reading "Mothering Your Nursing Toddler" - a book that LLL endorses. Bottom line is that it is a phase that will pass. It's super common for them to nurse "upon waking, going to sleep, or whenever mother sits or lies down" (not an exact quotation, but close). My daughter, now almost 5y, nursed until she was 2.5y. At 18m she suddenly dropped a few feedings and was nursing only 2 times a day regularly (plus comfort for owies). My son, however, nurses more frequently than that. Different babies have different needs. I've restricted him to only nursing at home or at a LLL meeting.
If you are wanting to further the weaning process there are a couple of good books out there. Actually the one I mentioned above has a good size chunk at the back that discusses several weaning methods. There is also "How Weaning Happens".
To me, it sounds as though you're wanting a breather between nursing sessions. Distraction is the key for me. Parks, zoos, etc. Make sure that fun snack foods and plenty of water are on hand. I cut apples, peaches, pears, etc into really thin slices and we call them "apple cookies"....of course it's just the fruit, but just calling it "cookie" makes it more desirable.
Beyond reading and distraction, I would recommend going to a LLL meeting.
http://www.lllusa.org/web/SanAntonioTX.html
It looks like there's one next Thursday morning. Perhaps you could go while the older ones are at school? You would be more likely to meet another mom of a nursing toddler...and you could ask what works for her.
Here is a link to groups and leaders in your area. If you're unable to make it to a meeting, you could call a Leader. Phone consults with LLL leaders are completely FREE.

I hope this helps. If something I wrote needs clarification or if you have any questions for me, don't hesitate to email me.

K., mama to
Catherine, 4.75y
Samuel, 20m

here's what i did. i'd suggest you cut out a few steps and go straight for the final stage.

get her a really really cute cup that is hers and hers alone. make a big deal about her new big girl cup. keep it filled with cows milk (sweetened and flavored with a bit of vanilla if you must). then, take a big deep breath and cut her off. she's going to cry. it's going to be awful. keep trying to push her to the cool big girl cup. give in. nurse. repeat cycle. take a deep breath. realize you need a new love-language to comfort your child. learn a way to comfort her that doesn't involve nursing. throw away the nursing chair (seriously. and it was hard). take benadryl to dry things up. then, send child to grandmas house for the night. go 24 hours without seeing her. during that time, enjoy eating and drinking for one. confirm with grandma that the little angel slept thru the night and was no problem at all (grandmas are great liars, but i wasn't going to press the issue). then, you're done. by that point, my milk was dried up most of the way (cabbage leaves helped for the rest of the weekend). once that happens, there's no going back. just keep her out of the nursing chair and nursing position, she'll soon forget. if grandma isn't an option, enlist your husband and go stay with a girlfriend (or in a hotel). he'll be glad to help just so he can get your body back.

seriously, it is easier for someone else to step in and help with this step. both of you will have an easier time that way. her cries stimulate things for you and it hurts. that's how we're wired. getting away from that crying helps you stay strong and stay focused on the bigger goal.

I stopped breastfeeding my daughter at 20 months. It was not by choice, I got mastitis and was on a high dose of antibiotics. Anyway, I told her that they had bobo's on them and she could no longer nurse. I am also a stay at home mom so that was harder because she could nurse anytime she wanted. The first night was horrible. She cried and I had to rock her to sleep everytime she would wake up and usually nurse to go back to sleep. Each night was better and I actually get to sleep through the night. Just do your best and be as loving to her in other ways as you can. More hugs and kisses. I really miss nursing her. It is such a sweet time. Good luck and I hope this helps.

This is tough because it makes you feel so bad. I'm sure you've put a lot of thought in to this decision and you know that it is right for you to stop now.

She is at an age where you can explain things to her calmly and she'll understand a great deal. Start consistantly, gently, lovingly holding her and explaining that she's getting to be a big girl and big girls stop nursing. Then take away one nursing at a time. Go a few days without that feeding and distract her with a sippy cup of warm cow's milk or an activity. Then do another feeding.

She will cry, scream, beg, etc. But you can't give in. Be strong. She'll figure it out and she'll stop placing so much importance on it once she sees that she's not going to win and that she's OK without it.

Gentle but firm. All the way. You can do it!!

Personally I'm against the going away to end the nursing phase. I think that it is mean. Baby depends on you for comfort, not just nourishment and that transition is really hard. They need you near them to encourage and guide them. I think it is a trust issue, too. I know it is hard, but if you go away it is not like you're going to have fun. You'll be worried. IMHO weaning is a process to love and nurture your baby through, leaving them to deal with all those feelings isn't a move which breeds security. But I do not know any babies but my own, so I'm not judging any other moms out there :)

Good luck.

I agree, 24-48 away with some benedryl! She will recover!!