Stress Making a Baby

I know how you feel. I tried for about 10 months to get pregnant and finally did and had a miscariage. I was devastated. My mom told me that when the time is right, it will happen, and that everything happens for a reason. well 7 months after that I was pregnant again, and with TWINS. So just be patient. It will happen when it is supposed to. Just dont give up trying.

I know exactly how you feel. I have a hard time conceiving myself. I'm 25 and just had my third baby. My daughter was my 1st and was a mistake but i love her all the same, I was fresh out of high school and met this really nice guy and hit it off imediately with him and weve been together ever since. Then 2 years later we wanted our daughter to have a play mate so we tried this time and it took almost 4 months, but we succeeded. Then we were having martial difficulites last yr and my husband said lets make another baby cuz he was hoping for anouther boy which he got. and this time it took me three months to get pg. I was miserable and resenting everyone just like you, cuz everyone around me was getting pg or about to have a baby. My advice is just hang in there and be patient a little longer. I was told yrs ago Iwasnt even able to have kids. and look at me now . A 5 1/2 yr old daughter, 3 yr little boy and a 1 month old son. Yes now im finished having kids but i defeated the odds and got what i wanted. I hope this helped you out. I hope you get your wish keep me informed will you.....J. from binghamton, ny

*hug* You sound very practical. You want to complete your family and raise your babies before heading into the workplace, which would probably be for good since you got your M.S.
You're only 24 so probably nothing's wrong with your fertility. You seem very stressed out, and maybe that's keeping you from getting PG. Just keep trying and don't be afraid to ask for your doctor's help. If your MD is condescending or patronizing, switch doctors.
GOOD LUCK. Don't pressure yourself so much!

hi S.,
it took us 8 months to conceive our son. just keep trying. it was even worse for me because i work in an ob/gyn office. just remember this, even under perfect conditions with two people with no medical problems there is still only a one in five chance each month to get pregnant. keep taking your prenatal vitamins and if after six months you are still not pregnant call your dr. they may want to see you and run some blood work. in the meantime. take your basal body temp at the same time every morning even if this means getting up at six am on sundays. you can buy inexpensive fertility monitoring strips at the pharmacy. or go all out and get a clearblue easy.

{{{HUG}}} Two months, in the grand scope of actively TTC, is not that long. I do know how you feel though, wanting to be pregnant sooner than circumstances are allowing and not being able to be pregnant. I completely understand those feelings. When I was having the same feelings, what helped me was remembering that God wasn't really trying to throw those big pregnant bellies and newborns in my face... that all of those pregnant women I saw everywhere all around me, even on TV and in magazine ads, had nothing to do with me. It was hard to take joy in other people's good fortune until I reminded myself that eventually what I wanted to happen WOULD happen, and that someday, some poor woman who felt exactly like I did would be looking at me and feeling upset because I seemed to have what she wanted. That thought really humbled me.

i am 29 yrs old and just had my 2nd child.. my first was not planned so that was easy but i was trying for 7 months before i conceived my 2nd. we did everything had sex two-three times a day when we thought we were ovulating we started ten days after my period and finished around twenty days then finally we gave up counting and did it ti just do and we got pregnant. i think it was all the stress of trying to get pregnant that was keeping us from getting pregnant. i to finished school after my first child and have the nagging of family memebers(my mom especially) to get going with my career. but ya know what i look at it as my degree will always be thee but my babies first smile and first word will not. if you and your family can afford you not to work then i suggest you be a mommy there is no greater pay then that.

Well, good luck, I truly mean that. I'm 29, and have a 5 yo girl. I can't have any more kids because I had cancer, and the chemo stopped my period. It's been 2 years since I've had it. I too would love to have 1 more baby, so I'm still hoping for it to come back. And I really do know how you may feel, luckily you are still young, and hopefully healthy. When I did conceive my daughter, it was hard, but somebody told me after sex, hold my legs up, with feet in the air for 1 minute, three weeks later, I was pregnant. Good Luck, K.

This will probably sound repetetive, but I hope it shows a pattern that you can find some encouragement in. I, like many of the women who have written so far, think relaxation and trying (!) not to stress too much will work wonders! I tried to get pregnant for a year and a half before my son was conceived. I got very bitter and frustrated and resentful of others in my life who seemed to just touch their husbands/boyfriends and get pregnant. My husband and I went on a short camping trip to get away from it all and low and behold, two weeks later I tested positive! My son is now 10-months old and I firmly believe that taking that vacation was the key! I was relaxed and didn't think about it and just enjoyed the time off with my husband. So, you're not alone - just try to relax! It will happen when the time is right! Good luck!

Hi S. !

When my hubby and I decided to try to get pregnant (the first time) we decided to just have fun with it. With no kids yet it was easy to have date night and snuggle all the time. I went off the pill and knowing that it takes up to 3 months for it to be completely out of your system we 'practiced' ALOT.... after the 3 months I was sure I would be PG in no time (I had been PG 4 times before (by another man - let me add before I met my hubby) but unfortunately lost them). It didn't happen right away and I started to get impatient.It was 4 months later and I was upset still not PG. Well after my period that month, we went out for date night and my hubby got me drunk. After our 'romp' if you will he decided he was going to put a pillow under my butt & hold my legs up in the air... With me still being disapointed about it not happening I pulled away from sex for a couple of weeks and next thing you know I'm dying for scrambled eggs... and I was late.. sure enough he got me to relax enough to not think about it and we found out we were pregnant right before his birthday. Our second child was infact easier ...but again alcohol induced... I wanted to be PG it felt like everyone was walking around with a belly and I missed it. We went to a wedding and after a great night of having fun with no children... I told him I'd hurt him if he stopped to get a condom and sure enough ..3 weeks later in time for Thanksgiving I was PG..

I guess what I want to say is relax - have fun - enjoy the practice and once you stop focusing on getting PG it will happen (maybe not right away) but it WILL happen.

Good Luck... now go jump on you hubby !
T.

PS -My OB/GYN told me that most women ovulate 7 - 10 days after the first day of their period and concieve much eacier at this time ...(my first was concieved on day 8 and my second was concieved on day 9 after the 1st day of my period)

About 8years ago before I got married my husband I were trying to concieve and we found out that if there is too much pressure or if you are under pressure your ability to concieve is going to be harder. So don't try so hard and don't think about it.

yup best way is just relax & not try believe me it works got 4 kids plus my uncle had tried with his gilrfriend but they stopped after finding out he was gonna be a grampa Now he has his 3 kids from his first marriage Her first 2 kids plus they have 2 for a total of 7 kids plus they have 4 grandkids & the grandkids are the ages of the youngest 2 .. so just keep calm sides 2 mnths not that long

Hi S.!
I know that trying to conceive can be very difficult and emotionally draining. I have a reproductive anomoly called uterus didelphus...I have 2 uteri! I am a freak of nature! LOL!

But on a lighter note, I can help make your conceiving experience with your husband be more fun again...because I know it can be very stressful. You should try to have fun with sex again and let nature take it's course. I sell sensual oils, lotions, creams, lingerie, and adult toys. You can even have a passion party in the privacy of your own home...give me a buzz! Good luck and I will pray to the fertility Goddess for you! :)

PURE ROMANCE BY N.
email: ____@____.com
website: noreenrequijo.pureromance.com
cell: ###-###-####

Hi S., I know how stressful it is because after my first child was born it was a little over a year before trying again so that both children would be the same age, but things did not go as planned and basically I gave up after 3 and a half years of trying then a month after we stopped trying I got pregnant. My doctor told me at first it was because I was stressed out all of the time because I would get upset when I was not pregnant. So when I finally gave up hope something happened because I was not stressed out anymore. Try not to get stressed because I think stress might have something to do with it.

Just an idea, don't think I'm crazy: some people believe in the theory that each woman has a time of year that is easiest for them to conceive. A LOT of my friends have children whose birthdays fall in the same month or one month apart. What month was your son conceived? Maybe it's not the right time of year for you...I know it sounds crazy but it could have some truth to it. Just a thought. RELAX, nothing will happen if you stress about it. Stop thinking about it as much as you can and when you least expect it, it will happen. Case in point: my cousin, who has been with her hubby for 18 years (!!!) just had her first baby after years of trying, then giving up. She held on to a job that she didn't really like but had wonderful maternity benefits, thinking it would pay off if she got pregnant. Well, she got a new job a while ago and within 6 months, through no heroic measures, she got pregnant!!! It threw them (and my aunt!) for a loop but their baby is 8 months old now and they are all loving every minute of it! Even though my cousin no longer has the job with the fantastic benefits everything has worked out (my aunt got fed up with her job and retired early and now takes care of the baby while my cousin is at work...they never even thought of that scenario before). Anyway, my point is, there is a reason for everything and while you may think you know the "best" way for things to happen, there may be a reason it's not happening like you think it should! Good luck, I will be thinking about you!

I remember that feeling all to well... It took us 2 years (and Clomid) to conceive our daughter, and it seemed like there were pregnant women EVERYWHERE I WENT!

Are you actively paying attention to your cycles, charting your BBT, using ovulation predictor kits, anything like that?

Hi S.

Hugs you can get a job for now and save some money and the pressure to concive will go away. If you worry about the problem it won't happen. find a job and relish in it for now.put your mind on something else it will happen. Do you know to save money and be gainful employed is great. Cause when you become pregant while at your new job after 8-12 of leave you will have another place to escape when your baby is ready for child care. you will have less stress to worry about finding a job. Enjoy your employment and save your money you will need it for the second child. good luck and keep your head up. Let me know how it works out. relax and enjoy.good luck girl.

Relax and let it come naturally. I have heard that when you are stressed it is harder to conceive. Good Luck.

Hi S.,

When I was 21 I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Disease. I underwent two years of chemotherapy and radiation. Throughout all of that I was told that I would never be able to conceive my own child...if I ever wanted to carry a baby I would most likely require an egg donor. Upon completion of all my treatment I actually began to go into menopause. My OB put me on the birth control pill to regulate hormones and told me we would cross the pregnancy bridge when we got there.

Well here I am 10 years later and I have a 16 month old and a second on the way. It did take us a year and a half to conceive our first child, and I needed to use clomid to time my ovulation, but the second baby came as somewhat of a surprise. I guess my reason for sharing all of this is because your mindset plays a big part...while trying to get pregnant the first time I truly believed it wasn't going to happen and I was mad and blamed everyone else who was pregnant.

Relax, Enjoy your husband and son and have fun trying!!! It will happen again!!

H.

It's when you're not trying that it'll happen, that's almost a sure thing. I TRIED faithfully, doing my temperature every morning, checking for my most fertile days, etc., we tried for 6 months before we got pregnant with Gina. Then ONE LONELY COLD NIGHT, not thinking about it or planning it BOOM I got pregnant with Evelyn! It's when you're not trying that it seems to happen, maybe your body knows when you're relaxed and having fun as opposed to stressing about whether it'll "take" or not, ya know? That does effect how your body reacts. Just kick back and enjoy the moment, it'll sure happen! :)

Don't stress. I now have 3 children. Thank God! I was trying desperately to get pregnant back in 1994, becaus my mother was very sick with leukemia and wanted her to see her first grandchild, and I was very stressed. My husband and I went down to Florida to visit my cousin and relax. Low and behold, pregnant! I was so excited to tell my mother. You need to relax, thats the best thing. Unfortunately, she passed 4 months before my son was born. He was actually born 3 days before her birthday in May. I got thru it and stayed strong, because I had a little one to take care of now. Life's not easy. I do get jealous when I see girls with their mothers, but I have a wonderful mom-in-law and aunts who take her place. Its not the same, but kids need that in their lives. Now I have 2 beautiful daughters, who I hope I am as close to as I was with my mother. Good luck to you.