Suggestions for New SAHM

A schedule is good.

Limit the about of 'noise time, that the tv or radio is on. When they are off, the room is quiet, and kids will be more apt to take a nap.

I stay home with my almost 3 year old and a schedule really does help you get through the day. Our day starts whenever he gets up (between 7-8) normally, we eat breakfast, brush teeth, get dressed etc. and then start the day. We do the library story time on Wednesday morning, he goes to nursery school one day a week (might be a good option, much cheaper than full time day care, and gives you a day to run errands, do major chores, go to job interviews, etc). The other days we try to get out in the mornings for activities. We'll either go to the park (free!), visits with Grandma, or run errands until lunch. Then home, lunch, a little free play time (whatever he wants to play), and rest time. Mine quit napping a few months ago, so this is the only time we have the TV on. He can pick from a couple different shows, and watch an hour's worth as long as he lays quietly to watch (no jumping around, playing with other stuff, etc). I don't love that the TV is our rest time, but after a couple months of fighting to get him to rest quietly in his bed I gave in. After rest time, he can play with whatever while I get dinner started or get whatever needs to be done around the house finished.

At this age, they LOVE to help. So if I'm mopping, he gets the little Swiffer and mops with me, cooking dinner, he gets a bowl with something to stir, etc. Most of the time, he'd rather "help" me, than play. Just give him things to do and he will let me get my part done.

I try to save painting, Play-doh, or other bigger and potentially messier projects for rainy days or days where I don't feel up to getting out. Then those replace our morning activity.

Good luck! One thing no one tells you about being a SAHM is that while it is infinitely rewarding, it's also hard, and at times can be both a bit boring (You want to play that game AGAIN?) and frustrating with a kiddo this age!

We both work, but on the days that we are at home, and during pre-school holidays, we spend most of our time outside of the home. The less you are home, the less mess you make/ have to clean up.

we get ready for the day, brushing teeth, breakfast, get dressed,
play something, put on laundry/ and or the crockpot,
clean up toys, make beds & leave
we go to the park or the library, or on a special outing museums, acquarium, a play date, to grandmas, to the supermarket, to the nature center.
we have lunch out, and then come home for a nap.
we wake up at 3ish,
we then do a 2nd activity (indoors or out).
we come home, have dinner, play or help mom with a household chore and get ready for bed.

Good luck through this time of change.
best,
F. B.

you need a sort of schedule but think of the schedule as a guide not a timeline..

for me.. I found that days went best.. if I got myself and the kids up and dressed and fed.. and we went someplace.. so we went to library story times.. to the grocery store.. wherever.. in the morning.. we got home in time for lunch and a nap. if it is warm enough take him to the parki let him run and run.. then come home for a nap.

libraries have story times.. and craft times.. there are moms groups that have playdates.. the mall playarea can be fun. a trip to the pet store to look at fish is great. take a trip to the zoo.. membership is usually a good deal.

I always did 1 load of laundry per day.. but your house will not be as clean as when you were working cause people are home all day messing it up..

a schedule is a good thing. But don't make yourself nuts trying to plan it to the minute. in the mornings just make it your regular routine to get up, make beds, have breakfast and get dressed and do teeth. after that check into your local park district and library. they have a lot of programs not just story time. ours has things like little gardeners (learn to plant things), mini picasso (art), free gym time, story time, music stuff etc. all free. also. for next year in case your still at home. sometimes the highschool has a preschool program that is run in conjuntion with an early childhood program at the school. it is usually free or very very low cost.

parks are free. most museums, aquariums etc have a free day each week. so check those out also.

art things don't have to be big huge projects. gluing things onto construction paper works. and when we were really broke the kids used newspaper to paint on.

drawing in a blob of shaving cream kept my kids occupied for as long as the cream lasted.

go to the library and look for some books on projects to do with kids. and get a series of books for each week. trip to the library on monday to pick them up and on friday to return. (those days could be adjusted according to any activities the library had going.
make nap (rest) time the only time the tv comes on in the daytime. and put on a show that is like a disney movie. I found that my kids didn't rest if it was a series of half hour shows on nickolodian as the beginning and ending music would jolt them out of the sleep they were sliding into. but a longer disney movie like lady and the tramp etc would lull them right into a nap. then the tv got lowered down as they were drifting off and off to sleep them went for an hour or so.

in that hour get your laundry thrown in. have him "help" with the housework by tossing things in the laundry hamper. at 3 my boys emptied the tiny trash cans from the bathrooms and bedrooms while I picked up. he can help straighten the bed. and can pick up toys so you can vac. don't do all those things out of his view or he will be one who thinks there is a cleaning lady. teach him to help.

Make a list of everything that needs to be done. Once that list is done, break it down by day and by am and pm. When I was home my schedule was something like.

laundry in am, MWF vacuuming kind of daily
bathroom in T,Th,Sat diapers M, Thu, Sat

lunch homemade bread W, Sat
nap (everyone)

prepare dinner
start dinner (if it was a roast put in oven)
walk to park

dinner
family time
ready for bed

I adjusted my schedule and had time for things I wanted to do and to go shopping. It will take about 3 to 4 weeks to get is perfected. I also made my meals from scratch and what we had leftover from dinner was the next day's lunch.

Good luck to you.

the other S.

PS Don't forget to put time for yourself for a nice hot bath to relax on the list.

For activities, try "family e-guide." I'm not very good at remembering to check it myself, but I know my neighbor finds all kinds of free stuff to do on there with her kids. I think they send either daily or weekly emails, letting you know what's going on the area.

Just take him to a park.
Boys that age, need to run around. They need to.
Do this in the mornings.
Then come home, have an early lunch. By 11:00 kids that age are hungry. Then eat. Then keep things quiet... tell him it is "quiet time" and let him deflate. Unwind. Then nap.

I also hope you filed for unemployment?

Have him just do things too, while you clean or whatever.
He's 3. Have some coloring books for him, puzzles, toy cars etc. And independent play is good too, for kids.
And you verbally tell him, "I'll be right here, I have to clean the kitchen...I can see you, you can see me... " etc. Cue him. Using your words. He will get used to it, and your routines. Too. Kids learn that.
You don't have to CONSTANTLY be entertaining him, one on one.
Then do whatever household things you have to do.

From the morning, you tell him what you both will be doing.
ie: we eat breakfast. Help Mommy put away. We'll go to the park and play. Then come home, eat lunch and nap. "
And if you have to assist him in going to his room or wherever to nap, then do so. This is new for you and him. But just do it. He as you said, is tired and needs a nap. Tell him his body has to rest, its important.
Have a routine, everyday.
But, little boys need to runaround. And I recommend doing this in the morning or mid-mornings. Then they get all their energy out. And then you can come home and rest/nap/have a quiet time. Routine.
I have a boy, and I used to do that with him when he was that age.
And he napped.
It was the routine.
He'd nap for 2 hours on average.

At first I didn't have a schedule.
I had to "find" one. It eventually came.
I kept my eyes/ears open for free things. I found many. More w/time.
Here's a basic idea of how I did things:
-poss start crockpot in morning or pull out something to defrost
-went to diff parks
-went to the zoo on half day
-found free train rides on diff days of week in diff areas
-library reading time (go to diff libraries)
-walk the mall in rainy weather. It's free & most have indoor play yards
-I would find toy stores that listed free days at things, found postings on diff boards for free Halloween pumpkin decorating/trunk or treating, free
carnivals etc.
-I would loosely plan my day like this (a fairly relaxed morning, a walk w/him in the stroller, library reading time, home for lunch and a nap etc.)
-I'd put in a load of laundry, get the dishwasher going, wipe down counters before he'd wake up after my coffee. Wait for him to wake up,
relax a bit, feed him breakfast, let him play a bit, change his clothes, go to library reading time, eat a lunch I had packed at a nearby park, play a bit there, off to home for possibly a nap, finish laundry, dust, make dinner, vacuum when he wakes up .
-Do things in 15-20 min increments so he can be occupied w/a few toys &
you get things done.
-It gets even better in a year (your time frees up a little)
-don't clip coupons to save $, buy generic
-Keep him active so he naps. Some days he may miss his nap. Also,
know that soon he may forgo his nap all together. Maybe in about 6
months.
-Sometimes when I knew he needed a nap but he wouldn't take one, I would either walk him in the stroller till he fell sleep or go for a short drive. When he'd fall sleep, I would pull over to a quiet part of a safe big
shopping center & read a book in the car while he slept w/me in the car for about 30 mins or more. So he got his nap & yes while I was captive in the car, I could read, make notes/lists etc. It's a short/passing phase. Do
what you need to do to get through it.
-Othr activities: play dates, picnics, zoo trips, feeding ducks at a nearby park w/a pond (just throwing bread froom afar), parades, carnivals, trips to the mall when it rained.

My schedule included:

Wake-up
Breakfast
Morning activity
Lunch
Afternoon activity
Quiet time/nap time
Supper
Evening activity
Relaxation time
Bedtime

Morning, afternoon and evening activities were generally about two hours long, but could be shorter or longer. We did lots of free activities, such as community play groups, library story time, play grounds, wading pools, watching airplanes land and take off at the airport, and we watched for free community events. We also bought memberships for the YMCA, Children's Museum and the Zoo, and went to those places regularly. Mini-golf, bowling and go-carting were not very expensive to do once in a while, and I was always able to find coupons for these activities. Running errands and grocery shopping also counted as activities. I made sure to start the dishwasher or put on a load of laundry before we left the house, and it would be done when I got home. Quiet time/nap time was my time to do housework and make supper. I put the kids on the sofa with a movie, and if they were tired they would fall asleep, although my kids were done napping for the most part long before they were three.

I went out EVERY morning to a free activity each day. Monday was the toddler/preschooler activity at the environmental center. Tuesday and Thursday were music and movement at the library. Wednesday there was a free craft at the family center. Or I'd switch it up and meet a friend at a playground, or for a tiny hike on a trail, or to play at their house (or our house). There was a free music class once a month. There was a free meetup time at the family center...with a small indoor play structure and lots of toys. Or we'd just go to the library to color, read, and check out books. On thursdays we would go to the farmers market and walk around. I did the local MOMS group for a while. That was meeting once a week for play dates. I did a local running group for a while...moms taking turns running vs. watching all the kids. The local historic museum was fun to go to on some mornings. The local science museum was fun to go to now and then. Another activity was we would ride the bus downtown (free), feed the ducks at the pond, and ride back. All these things are free. Sometimes we went to the pool which does cost a little bit...$5 for both of us to swim. We would usually leave home by 9 and we would come home for lunch. After lunch was nap time. Then my oldest would be getting off the bus and before I knew it it was time to make dinner! As for naps...some kids are really hard due to their personality! Just call it quiet time and enforce lying down together in a dimly lit room for an hour...put on some mellow music. Maybe your little one will give in and nap for you. If not at least you both had some quiet time.

If your husband's income is low enough you can get assistance to pay for child care while you actively look for work. You can get child care assistance while you go on interviews, go to the employment office and see what they have, go to classes at the employment office, everything.

I have had kids in child care and the parents didn't pay a penny for 6 months, the mom was trying to open her own business detailing cars. She didn't make a go of it so her income stayed low.

You may not have to take him out if you get assistance and continuously look for a job.

O. tip: have a plan B. Always. Sometimes, Plan C or D.
You can have the best intention but dragging a crabby toddler to story time is no fun fir anyone involved! Lol
Keep the set nap/rest schedules.
Plan around that.
O. errand, O. outing per day is something to shoot for.
Good luck!

We got out in the mornings, doing something i.e. errands, the park, library etc. Came back for lunch and I laid down with them at that age and we all napped. Afternoons were chores which they helped me with, we went over colors, sorting, sang songs etc. 3 was my favorite age, they are so sweet and still love to cuddle. Enjoy your time with him and make the everyday stuff be fun!

You will look back at this time as a huge blessing!

Well, I do have to say that you can get some good outdoor time in now that it is getting warmer! This is key, I think, in getting your 3 year old to take a nap! I have a three year old also, and that Winter was getting long!! So now I make sure he is getting the most out of the better weather! I don't know your living situation, but I have been in an apartment with a 2 year old, so we were at the park a ton during that time, so as others have said, library is great, sometimes they have little preschool "classes" there...or story times...there would be evenings when I would find myself just wandering shopping centers and window shopping with her....teaching her little things and talking about whatever is going on around us...plus walking around and burning that energy....if you have a yard, use it! Sidewalk chalk, throwing a ball around, bubble blowing, everything is exciting at three! There are lots of little blogs out there and there is Pinterest if you feel like you need an idea or two to get you started...now that I have a 6 year old who is in school and a 3 year old here with me its all new again...I have found that if we can just drop everything and go outside when its beautiful out there the rest will fall into place later. When we stick around the house I can EASILY feel like I need to be doing housework because its staring me in the face! If we just get outside and or leave, the kids have a lot more fun, and get more worn out! The upside to that, I am happy because they are happy :) I have found that a sand table and water table are worth their weight in gold by the way....and it doesn't even have to be the 50 dollar one from the store, it could be dish pans and recycled cups and things! Get creative, he will love it!