Summer Schedules and Activities

Updated on June 15, 2015
L.G. asks from Chicago, IL
19 answers

My kids are almost 6 and 8. This summer I have tried to keep things unscheduled since they are now old enough to exist without constant supervision at home and organized activities. One week in and we have gone to a beach bonfire with a big group of friends and camped for a few days. Both of these caused late bed times. My take is that it's summer and I don't want the rigid bedtime routines and structure that they have during the year. I also want them to have time to relax and reconnect. My husband believes they should maintain their bedtime routine. He also complaining that there were a couple days due to weather and being tired from late nights, that they didn't get outside to play. I am trying to let them hang out, while getting them out with friends and to the beach and all when we can. I feel like getting them in bed by 830 or 9 should be fine.....normally it is 730 or 8. Question is....how do you manage summer? Do you keep a lot of structure, control and routines? Do you let it all go and are open to what each day brings? Or a combination of the two? Thanks for your thoughts! :)

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N.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I had an 8pm bedtime when I was a kid. All the neighborhood kids would gather outside my bedroom windows since it was still daylight outside.

I think it's cruel to make kids go to bed before sundown, ever. I think you can let the kids have a later bedtime and do more with them when it's summer.

3 moms found this helpful
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C.B.

answers from Boston on

How about them getting ready at the same time but they can stay up later in their rooms? That way he gets time without them and they get more freedom.

1 mom found this helpful

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Foot loose and fancy free always worked for us!

4 moms found this helpful
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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

We don't strictly adhere to bedtime for special events or in the summer. So DD got to go to a concert and stay up til 10:30 and sleep in the next day. We do generally get her ready for bed around the same time, but it's flexible when we don't have to be out the door by a set time. On the flip side, if we have a tour or even that starts early, she goes to bed a little earlier. My DD is 6 and 9PM is routine for her. I would talk further to your DH (especially if you do the bedtime routine) about why he thinks it should be earlier and why he's so upset if they don't get outside that day. Is it more about him wanting quiet than the schedule?

4 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm confused, your kids went camping this week and your husband is complaining about them not getting outside?
And who puts school age children to bed when it's still light out?! That's just mean :-(
Look, a routine is good, but a tight schedule is less necessary when school is out.
Most of us are a bit lax in the summer. It doesn't mean you let them stay up all night but geez, aren't they even going to get a chance to catch lightning bugs? As an Iowa girl that's one of my fondest childhood memories.
Sorry but your husband sounds like a jerk.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.N.

answers from Chicago on

Bedtime for our 8 yr old is 8-8:30 during the year. In the summer it is a half hour later because he's outside when it's nice in the evening and then needs a shower. He still has to get up and go to camp 3 days when I work so we don't sleep in.

We have planned activities some day but he enjoys playing in the neighborhood so sometimes we're just hanging out. We have meals at the same time every day, always make time for reading and then leave a lot of time unstructured. If no friends are around in the neighborhood, we go somewhere or call friends.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.G.

answers from Portland on

Is your husband concerned because your kids get crabby? Some kids do need early bedtimes - they don't do well if they don't get enough sleep. And some kids get really antsy if they don't get exercise/energy out. So I guess it depends on your kids. You didn't say why your husband doesn't like your approach.

We are much more laid back in the summer. My kids can't lie there awake with sunlight out so I just let them go more or less when tired and they are able to drift off (which tends to be a bit later than school). If they are a bit sluggish, no biggie, take a breather in afternoon.

We are pretty unscheduled. We have a pool and there's parks, lakes and friends nearby - so whatever goes. I am not a heavily structured person anyhow. I'm much more what is weather like, who's around, are we having lazy day or do we want to go somewhere type person. My husband has somewhat flexible schedule so if it's nice we just take off to beach.

We do a few camps and my older ones are in sports (but drop in, not super organized games) to keep them doing something during summer and to break it up. Camping (tent) or even set up in backyard and have friends over. Bonfires, badminton .. picnics.

Enjoy your summer :) Beach bonfire sounds fun - love those!

2 moms found this helpful
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Z.B.

answers from Toledo on

A happy medium works best for me. We have some structure. The kids just went to a VBS this week. In a couple of weeks the'll go to a half day camp. We have down time as well and went to the pool twice this week.

I do think 6 & 8 year olds need some structure and guidance and definitely a bedtime routine. Maybe they don't need the same bedtime they have during the school year, but most still need the routine.

I try to relax the strictness but keep the structure and routine.

2 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

i can't think of any good reason to be overlord-ish about summer bedtimes. even if you don't go all 'whatever you want', you can still go with your sensible schedule.
it would be torture for me (or my kids) to go to bed when it's still light outside.
what exactly does he want you do about the weather?
?
one of the loveliest thing about summers is the relaxation and freedom from tons of rules and schedules. i hope your husband listens to you.
khairete
S.

2 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I can't imagine sending my kids to bed before sunset, ever. I'm assuming they have to get up very early for school, because 7:30 seems like a very early bedtime, especially for school age kids. Anyway, we don't hold to rigid routines during the summer. Our activities dictate our bedtimes. Kids are resilient and should be able to adjust to different bedtimes. I do generally have lots of activities planned with little downtime, but that is because we aren't homebodies. Although we do a lot of activities they are pretty unstructured as to when and for how long.

2 moms found this helpful
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R.B.

answers from Dallas on

Here's a thought, your DH may feel the later bed time infringes on his downtime.

My kids are 5-9 I will let my kids stay up 1 hour from tageted bed time during school. IMO Too far off schedule makes a harder adjustment at the end of the summer. My kids normally go to bed at 8 sometimes a late school night means 830 so summer they go to bed no later then 9. My oldest has a 9 pm bedtime during the school year so he can stay up a little later depending on our morning schedule.

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Keeping their original bedtimes seems way too early for summer.
Does he say that because he wants them out of his hair? If that's the case,
tell the kids to play in another area of the house so he's not bothered.
In my opinion they should get to stay up later. It's vacation, it stays lighter
later, it's not hard to get them back on track.
They need/deserve the break.
You can find ways to keep them out of his hair at night so he can have some
peace & quiet if that's what he's looking for.
As far as "managing" summer, I don't really. I like to leave some things up
for fun or changes.
We do have vacations planned.
I try to do fun thing every day.
We do some active things (hiking, park play, bike riding etc) before it gets
hot every day.
I take the kids a ton of places on my own so we can get out of the house &
enjoy the summer but it's not a set routine nor is it rigid. They deserve a
break.
There's a place down the street where they can do for a few hours every
morning for 3 or 6 weeks but we don't do it because it costs quite a bit of
money.
We meet friends at the park, beach, lake etc.
I take them everywhere so hubby doesn't have to.
I let them hang out & relax but I still make sure we stay active. We just beat
the heat.
We do picnics, go to diff parks in the area, go to outdoor malls to walk
around, we do crafts at home, go to local zoos etc.
I say choose a later bedtime, get outside to do fun things then keep a bedtime routine but not so early. I think 9:30pm might be a good time?
Hope you have a fun summer.

2 moms found this helpful
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E.B.

answers from Beaumont on

I'd say a combo of the two. Crazy day, lazy day, crazy day, etc....I'm a big believer in balance. My boys are now 14 and 13 but even now, I make sure they get at least 9 hours sleep, most of the time.

2 moms found this helpful
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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

"Bedtime" is out the window here! Lol
At 12, my son is all about swimming, baseball and hanging with his tribe.
We are all chauffeurs at this point.
He needs to be ready to leave at the pre-arranged time, have his phone with him and answer/return calls & texts from us ASAP.
It's SUMMER!

1 mom found this helpful
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M.P.

answers from Portland on

I consider how tired kids are during the day. If they're grumpy and have difficulty participating in daytime activities, I consider going to bed earlier. Some kids need more sleep than others. If they are consistently grouchy from lack of sleep, I'd put them to bed earlier.

I do think that bedtime should be close to the same time every night except for special events. Camping at the beach qualifies as a special event. My grandkids do better keeping some sort of routine as far as bedtime and meals are concerned. If your kids are more flexible, i.e. they may do alright with a more flexible bed time. At the age of your kids, my grandchildren weren't able to adjust with differing bedtimes. If they got to bed late, they still woke up early and couldn't take naps and we're grouchy the next day. So with a later bedtime, I planned the next day to be a quiet day without structured activity.

Bedtime at 8:30-9:00 is certainly a reasonable bed time. My 2 an 3 yo grandchildren's regular bedtime is that. Their bedtime is based on when they consistently get tired. They rarely go to bed later than that because by then they fight with each other, they cry easily, and are difficult. Their bedroom has black out curtains.

I suggest bedtime should depend on the amount of time the child needs to enjoy the next day. It's OK to be lethargic on some days but not everyday. I suggest that if they are cranky and difficult they need more sleep or need more food.

My daughter and her husband do not have regular meal times. The kids are frequently cranky when I come to watch them. I've found that feeding them improves their demeanor.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.B.

answers from Chicago on

My girls are 9 & 12. We are much more laid back in the summer w the schedule. They usually stay up during the week until 9:30-10. Hubby has to get up at 5:30 (I get up w him) so he wants them in bed. During the school year it's 8:30. I let my kids sleep-in until wherever unless we have somewhere to be at an early hour. They will be going to camp the last 4 weeks before school starts on MWF. I chose this because that's when everyone is bored and making me crazy! They have to be at camp at 8:30. Once camp starts they will not be up until 10, but for now it's no big deal. Also, when there is a sleepover of some kind they are wiped out the next day, so they go to bed by 8:30-9...if they can make it that long! It's really hard to make the kids go to bed when it's still light out. I know the last couple of weeks of school are tough on my youngest and she is always protesting about going to bed when it's still bright. I start the morning/night routine back up a few days before school starts. We are also a family that sleeps-in, on the weekends, all-year-round unless we really have to be somewhere! No one calls before 10.

1 mom found this helpful

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

We are more relaxed in the summer and both our kids go to bed a little later. The nights there are beach parties, pool parties, neighborhood gatherings they stay up even later because they are out running around with the other kids, catching fireflies and having fun. Last night we had family in town and we all grilled dinner and swam in the pool till 9pm! Then we had ice cream! Our kids went to bed at 10:30 which is crazy late for them (usually it's around 8pm). This morning they are sleeping in. After a crazy night like this we do try to get back to a slightly more normal bedtime.

1 mom found this helpful

O.H.

answers from Phoenix on

My kids are older. My 12 yo goes to boys club every day of the week because he has ADHD and really needs to move around. It's too hot here in the summers so we are mostly inside or swimming in the mornings.

My daughter is 15 and she sees friends or mostly is helping me organize the house, play video games and watch some tv, shop and helps me meal plan and cook.

It is easier to keep to the same sleep schedule but I'm not one of those moms that freaks out if they stay up later as long as they can get up in the morning on their own. Mine always have been able to do that. Maybe try it with them and see how they do.

I think it depends on your kids on how much structure they need or if they are ok with just going with the flow. I hope you find some things that work for you. Good luck!

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I do a combination. If there is something going on, then I don't worry about bedtime and if they need down time the next day, so be it. But if there's nothing going on, then I do allow for a later bedtime (about an hour to an hour and a half). I do, however, bring back the school year bedtime about a week before school starts just to get the routine started again and so their internal clocks can re-set.

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