J.J.
hi A.! i totally hear you; i have a 2.75 yr old, a 1 yr old, and a TEN YR OLD PIT BULL who is a huge sissy mush dog that is afraid of the kids. but sometimes i find myself walking down the street w my big boy walking along side me dawdling, the baby in the stroller, and the poor old dejected dog dragging along on her leash looking like she lost her best friend, and i'm like, what has my life come to??? this is too absurd!
but here's something for perspective; my neighbor has a 4 yr old, a 3 yr old, is pregnant, and has 2 dogs, and her husband is often out of the country for weeks at a time, and like me, she has no relatives or help of any kind nor any money for a dog walker. i'm ashamed when i complain after i run into this woman on the street.
anyway i would say this to you; could you afford a dog walker? if you can get a great one, the dog will love to see him / her, it would be a real treat for the dog; maybe your relatives can pay for it since they obviously love the dog as well. if the dog walker can take the dog out for a big exercise walk every day, say for a solid hour, she could probably go a lot longer between walks.
my husband has to walk the dog first thing in the morning, maybe your husband can do the first walk and make it a good 15 or 20 minute jaunt around the block to make she she has enough chance to do her business.
but i would be a tiny bit concerned about a 6 yr old dog that has frequent accidents; is it possible the she has a bladder infection? a dog that age shouldn't have to go more than 3 times per day; of course ideally she would go out frequently but with a baby the dog simply has to learn to wait, this is the new pecking order; baby first, and everyone else 3rd, basically. anyway i think you should take her to the vet. is it also possible that she's having accidents on purpose to show you that her feelings are hurt about the baby? that's a pretty typical way that dogs show thier dismay. maybe you could take an extra 20 minutes or half hour every day after you put the baby to bed to play with the dog and really talk to her and give her lots of love. and maybe weekends when your husband is home from work, you could take her for a special walk, an hour or so, just the two of you, stopping for lots of intermittent dog hugs and snackies.
good luck!
J.