Tearing During Childbirth??!!!!

My son was born 2.5 years ago. I didn't tear, because I requested to be cut. However, I still get sore. If I am up cleaning, walking around all day I feel that achy soreness of 2 weeks after I had him. Maybe we are more sensitive? My sisters and friends act like I am crazy when I tell them...??? Sorry, not very helpful.

I had an extensive episiotomy that took months to heal, but since I only delivered once, I have nothing to compare that to.

It's interesting to hear that some moms report having a harder time with a tear than a cut, because some recent research suggests that the tears tend to heal more quickly with fewer complications.

I can relate to your emotional trauma, though. I delivered almost 40 years ago in a hospital that actually tied women's arms down on the delivery table so we wouldn't "violate the sterile field." I can still get pretty furious if I dwell on those memories, so I don't.

Wow, I had a small tear with baby #3 and the recovery was horrendous! I had pain at the site and nerve pain for almost a year - at it was only a small tear. Conversely my previous 2 deliveries were with another ob who I LOVED but she retired, and I had epesiotomies (spelling nightmare) with both of the deliveries and hardly and pain after the 6 weeks. So, you aren't alone at least. I am at 18 months now and have no issues at all, I guess it just takes longer to heal a tear than an incision. Not too sure.

I think episiotomies take time to heal. I had two during both child births. The first time, the first four months, it was terrible pain all the time. Going to toilet was a nightmare too. After 4 months the pain started to ease and then by six months I was fine. The second time it healed a bit faster, not much though, took 5 months. My gynec gave me hormone creams to maintain wetness in the area and this seemed to help. You should talk to your gynec about it. Though after first 3 months, my male Obstetrician was not helpful, he just did not believe that I was still in pain. So, I found a female gynec and went to her and she prescribed the cream. She also recommended hot water baths as often as possible.

I know exactly what you are going through. I had a forcep delivery with my 1st daughter that resulted in a 3rd degree tear. After the tear had completely healed the pain was still almost too much to bear. I couldn't be intimate with my husband without crying. I went to my ob/gyn and she referred me to physical therapy. I honestly thought it was going to be a waste of time. It was the best thing I could have done. The therapy consisted of rebuilding the strength in the pelvic muscles and some current therapy. I never knew there wasa masters degree for this kind of problem. It only took about two months of therapy. I have since has another daugter and have had absolutely no problems. I hope this helps!!

It took me over a year to heal from my sons birth he had shoulder distocia, they didn't use a vacuum but they did have to stitch back on one of my "flaps" and do a lot more stitching on top of that. I had a horrible itching feeling that would come and go at the worst times of course, and then the sharp pain that would come at times. Now three years later I don't even notice it anymore. worried about the delivery of our third child in three months and what will happen with that one. I will be opting for an epesiatomy as I healed much better with that when I had it with my first. I have given an heavy cream with steroids to help heal the skin that helped a lot. Just don't over use it. I hope you start to get relieve soon it is no fun to heal from a bad tear like that. I would suggest going in to the doctor as I did just to make sure everything is healing right but it does take time.

Mine is more recent, so I can't speak to a year passing, and I had only second degree tears, but it is taking a little longer to feel like normal than I thought...but the Dermaplast spray helps a lot!! The told me to take some sitz baths as well...that should relieve some of the discomfort. Ask your ob/gyn if everything is normal or if you may have gotten an infection or something....I know when I got my arm operated on, the stitches healed, but it still hurt and then got REALLY itchy....it was like that for years and years..and to this day I still have a raised scar there - I asked the dermatologist and he said I have really thick skin....it has finally stopped itching though - but it's been over 3 years....so hopefully your tears will stop hurting eventually too.

I had a problem with tearing and had to have corrective surgery a year later to deal with the scar tissue, which was what was hurting. my doc removed the scar tissue (basically, they had me on the operating table and she poked around, everywhere that i said hurt she marked then removed once I was out) then I took sitz baths in the kind of salt used for salt water aquariums (apparently this was very embarrassing for my husband to buy, as the sales people were asking what kind of fish it was for, and he had to say it was for his wife to soak in, hee) which the doc recommended b/c it disolves better in water than regular epsom salt. My mom kept telling me I was just being a baby, but I'm glad I pushed it and had the surgery, as it was pretty painful before that.

After I had healed from the surgery, i still had a little pain, and my doc prescribed a testosterone cream, which I rubbed on my thigh every night before bed, and it did the trick, finally, after a year and a half, pain free.

my daughter was large, i labored and delivered w/o an epidural, and i needed 3 episiotomies (both sides and down). i wasn't fully numb by the time my doctor had to perform them. then during the stitching process, she couldn't get me fully numbed on one side. recovery was horrendous. my daughter is almost 2, and i still ache when my husband and i have sex. i've spoken to my doctor about it, and she says i healed all the way, but i think i have some nerve damage. i'm due again in a few months and obviously scared of tearing along my scar, which i hear is common. you're not alone! talk to your doctor and see if you can get some relief.

I had a couple of tears that were stitched up, and one of them hurt for at least a year, and now at 25 months, it still does not feel right.
I had a cut on my cheek [sort of under my eye] from childhood that needed stitches and I remember the scar hurt for a very long time with that, too. I don't know why this happens, but you are not the only one.

I had only a small labial tear and no problems with recovery (only took a week). If they used a vaccuum to get her out, they probably cut you and the cut tore out.
It is possible with a high degree tear, that you heal suboptimal and need surgery to address the issues. I would seek out an uro-gynecological surgeon that specializes in reconstructive surgery and get an assessment.

The vacuum was used on my son for the same reason. I had an episitomy & a couple months after it didn't feel right (it wasn't a 4th degree tear, though). I thought the dr. sewed it poorly. I went to my ob/gyn (a different one in the practice) & she put some liquid nitrogen on it to help it heal. It did & all was fixed. If you haven't already, I would seek an opinion from an ob/gyn different than your delivering dr. Just make sure they are doing what they can do. Good luck.

have your ob/gyn check it out, to make sure no problems

I've had 3 children. I had a tear with the first and each child after I tore along the same stitched area. It was a clean tear though. Doing lots of kegals and just time to heal helped. Good luck.