Teenage Driver, Hit and Run, Call Police or Find Neighbor?

Updated on February 04, 2012
M.R. asks from Edmonds, WA
40 answers

Basically, am I being too soft? I need your voices of reason here Mama's.

I arrived home a couple of nights ago to 2 women standing in front of our house taking pictures of our driveway and home. After pulling into the garage I asked if I could help them. It was a mother helping her daughter. The daughter had struck a landscape rock in between my driveway and our neighbors driveway, which made the girl lose control of her car. The mother kept repeating..."I just don't know how hitting this rock could total my daughter's car? It's just completely totaled" She was very baffled by the amount of damage caused by the object she hit. The police had already come, made a report, left, the car had already been towed away by the time I showed up. The mother said their insurance wanted pictures. It was now past 5:30pm, meaning darkish. I assured them that the rock looked fine, but it was actually in my neighbors yard, not ours, so they would need to leave notice with them. Our neighbors are out out of the country for a few weeks, but I did not say this to them. And honestly, I never leave the house in my house slippers...but was in such a rush that this one time I had, so I was a tad embarrassed standing there in my furry house slippers, so I did not think to take their information and forward. As I was trying to get inside to make dinner before piano lessons.

Anyhow, the very next morning, I'm pulling out of our driveway and notice right away that the back of one of our cars, parked on the street for the first time, had been hit and had a huge dent on the back. Without a doubt, I think that this teenage girl, hit the 2' high rock, sailed over it and rammed into the back of our car, which was on the other side of the driveway (3 car size).

I think my choices are as follows: #1 - Call the police and insurance company and be done with it, except for our $500 deductible. (Ouch). #2 - go find the family, as they did tell me they live in the neighborhood and I would certainly recognize them if I saw them again, and offer her a chance to fess up? Because, as a mother, and as a human being, haven't we all made stupid decisions? Especially when you're younger, and stupider and stressed? If I call the police, I can file a new report as a Hit and Run, and I can ask for a copy of the police report taken. Wouldn't a hit and run be a serious crime on one's record?

Would you as a mother of a teenage driver, want to learn about this from the police or the neighbor? Am I putting myself in harms way approaching them? Am I putting myself in future jeopardy by not approaching them and they would ask why did I not come them first? Or because it stands as a hit and run, I just keep it simple and let insurance handle it?

I spoke with a lawyer in our neighborhood, and he clearly said it is not my responsibility to investigate. This was just bad luck, pay the deductible and let it go. But then, you know what most of us think about lawyers...

I'm doubting myself so much right now, because honestly, my gut response was to wonder why would this girl be so afraid that she has to hide something this huge? Or is she a spoiled brat and thinks she can get away with it? I'm conflicted about finding the family versus calling the police. My initial response is to give her the benefit of the doubt and give her an opportunity to tell the truth before I turn it into a very serious allegation. But, honestly, what if she had hit a kid? I have lost sooooo much respect for teenage drivers, especially ones who txt and drive...and this incident solidifies my negative attitude even more.

What would you do?

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for the well-intended advice!!

I'm surprised at those who think I'm being judgemental about teen drivers. When in fact our entire insurance industry charges exorbitant, marked up rates for teen drivers. So I'm clearly not alone. And when my older daughter was in high school in SoCalif there are entire businesses that go around to high schools re-staging 'real' accidents caused by teenagers. They use kids as actors from the high school they'll be showcasing the accident at. It's an all day re-enactment. So please, teenage drivers have bad reputations that goes way beyond what I write here. 2nd only to drunks? But what do I know?

And to reiterate a few key points missed in some of the responses....I was not at home during the accident. There is no alarm on the car, it's just a Ford Escape, which belongs to my older daughter.

And my thoughts too, how can one hit a car and not know it? Did she bonk her head first from hitting the rock and she did not see what came next?

And the 'hit and run' term came from the insurance agent. The accident happened TUE pm, I had to leave town WED & THUR, so I called him directly and asked him what to do. But his English is so poor, I don't think he understood the details. And he called it a hit and run.

And more than the bumper is damaged..the entire left quadrant of the back panel (door? hatchback? trunk?) is dented in with paint markings.

And, I have to pay the $500 deductible if the police do not connect the dots, or the girl denies it. And since they failed to assess the accident site thoroughly already, and knowing how little insurance companies fight for their customers nowadays....unless I fight for myself, I don't think anyone else will have our best interests in mind.

The plot thickens....I called the non-emergent police #, and was told that the parties involved did not call the police to come out for an accident report, but rather walked into a nearby station and filed a report and statement. And since my name is not on the report, I am not allowed a copy of it. I thought these were public records???

So, I see cover up all over this now....ugh...

And the reason I cannot get a copy of the initial police report is due to the FOIP, the Freedom Of Information and Protection agreement. So, these records are not public, as we are all led to think or believe, and tell others.

This site never ceases to amaze me with how a question, simple or complex, can turn into a character assassination. Marda, IF I were truly as judgemental as you deem, I would have gladly called the police to report the accident and not have considered trying to contact the family on my own time.

**Important Update** -

A police officer came and took a report, and my immediate suspicions were completely WRONG. Yes, I am admitting that I was completely incorrect in assuming the accident TUE night was connected to WED morning. The police officer looked up the report filed and informed me that the car involved with accident was a black BMW SUV. The paint markings on the back of our car are clearly light, almost white. The police officer stated that the dent on my car and bumper was too high for the other vehicle involved. Which then I remembered, that the real reason I even noticed our car was that the WED morning pick up of our garbage and recycling bins were all haphazardly replaced behind our car, which I had never seen them placed so. When I told the police officer that it had indeed been trash day, she recognized the dent as a rather common problem with the automatic arms from the dump trucks.

What are the odds, eh? Of such an untimely accident being a coincidence? This is such a classic case of of playing judge and jury before the trial.

So, thanks to all of you for your time and my sincere apologies as well for not just calling the police and letting them put the pieces together. And my apologies to the lawyers :)

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

Report it. They already have her name and address and they can go straight to her with the new information. Do not delay.
If it were my teenager I would want to know. I would also rather the police were the ones to come to me with new information instead of a very unhappy neighbor. It will save her a little embarrassment too.

3 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

I would drive the neighborhood once, then I would call the police, make a hit and run report and move on. It was her responsibility to take responsibility and quite frankly I do not want her behind the wheel in MY neighborhood with MY 5yo.

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J.A.

answers from Portland on

The kid needs a chance to make it right, and the parents of the kid need to know the full extent of what happened. If the girl knows but didn't tell her parents, well, that presents issues that they need to resolve, and if she didn't, then it gives her a chance to take full responsibility, which is character-building. I would rather hear it from a neighbor than a police officer if it were me.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

I suggest you're over thinking this. Call your insurance company and let them handle it. You should not have to pay the deductible because the girl's (she's at fault) will have to pay it.

Since you don't know the girl or her mother or the name of their insurance company, call the police and ask to add to a report that they took on an accident in your neighborhood.

Why do you say this is a hit and run? The police took a report. Hit and run is when the driver and car leave the area and do not accept responsibility for the accident. Having been in and also investigated accidents it's quite possible she didn't register that she also hit your car. And the police were somewhat sloppy in their investigation. They should have looked at nearby cars for damage. Give her the benefit of the doubt.Because she lives in the neighborhood I would guess she went home and someone called the police. That is not hit and run, in the real world, tho it may be technically.

I also suggest you're being very judgmental. Do you know she was texting? She is a young, inexperienced driver who made a mistake of some sort. She is accepting responsibility for the accident. Just as you didn't check your car because you were anxious about your slippers and getting dinner, can you imagine how upset and anxious she was and thus might not even remember hitting your car.

And it's not fair to say all teen age drivers are irresponsible. As a police officer I rarely investigated an accident caused by a teen. Adults are by far worse drivers in my opinion. Drunks cause far more accidents than teens.

Call the police and ask to talk with the person who can include your info in the original police report. Call your insurance company and give them the name of the girl's insurance which you can get from the police report. You do not pay the deductible! The girl is at fault and her insurance will pay the whole thing. The accident does not appear as a negative on your record with your insurance.

I'm a retired police officer.

After your SWH: Yes, you do have to stand up for yourself. And it'll be more difficult since your agent doesn't speak English very well. I'd ask to speak to a different agent. We frequently get what we expect and so I suggest that with your negative attitude you may end up paying the deductible.

If you call the police and are persistent, not hesitant as your post sounds, the police will connect the dots. Be confident when you talk with them. Know that your car was in the accident and know that you're not going to pay the deductible.

Yes, teen drivers have accidents and their rates are higher because of that. But that doesn't make all teen drivers irresponsible. People who've had accidents also have higher rates does that make all drivers irresponsible?

To answer Live Bold. If she did hit her head, which is likely, memory just prior to being hit often goes away. Even if she didn't hit her head, the adrenaline gets pumping so fast that the memory skips over things. It's like being so scared you don't know what to do even tho if you weren't frightened you'd know. The synapses are firing so rapidly that memory isn't formed. Memory can come back later but not necessarily.

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J.G.

answers from Minneapolis on

Echoing what others have said, call the police and ask it to be added to the report, then call your insurance company and let them sort it out. I doubt this will be considered a hit and run as the police were there. Who knows what happened? Not your responsibility to figure it out in any case.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Its very possible that everything happened so fast she didn't actually know what happened. She may not have seen the damage and that was why they were looking around, to figure out what else she hit.

So if it isn't that hard to track them down I would first point out what else they hit.

In front of my house I witness the most spectacular crash. I don't think that girl could have included more objects if she tried. I am also fairly sure only I know how many things she hit.

I guess I am saying give her the benefit of the doubt, if they had something to hide they would not have told you what was going on and you would be staring at the dent scratching your head.

I just wanted to point out if you report this it would not be a hit and run. She called the police.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I would handle this through the police and the insurance company. The police officer will connect the dots. And mention to them the previous incident. TECHNICALLY you don't know whether this driver--or another--hit your car. They will investigate and determine what happened.

You DON'T want to go through the hassle of having a private party pay for this. If they will. In a timely manner. IF you can find them.
Your insurance won't be affected--your car was PARKED at the time, and the driver's insurance should cover the damage AND the deductible.

Odd that they were looking all around and taking pictures and STILL didn't see the damage to your car (was it still parked on the street?).

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K.P.

answers from Seattle on

Go to the police, Tell them your discovery, File a Report, and move on. Stop analyzing the other family and their issues. She had an accident and whether she is hiding something or really didn't know, she has to deal with it.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

Mum:

Call the police and your insurance company and tell them what you told us. Get pictures yourself.

It is ENTIRELY possible that the girl was in shock from the accident and didn't realize she hit your car. Hitting a 2 FOOT rock can total a car.

You can investigate. If you want to spend your time doing that. The insurance company most likely won't investigate (find MzKitty, she's an insurance agent - if she hasn't responded yet and ask her), they will fix the car and you will pay the deductible.

IF you feel that strongly about it - find them and tell them what happened. She really may not know she hit your car - it's a total shock when you are in an accident.

What would I do? Well, if someone hit my van I'd be YYYYYAAAAAHHHOOO!!!! :) We're looking to replace it anyway! :)

I would call my insurance company and let them handle it. I would stop stressing over it and just get 'er done!

5 moms found this helpful

R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

I would call the cops. Report it and while they are there doing the report let them know that you just noticed it and a couple days earlier you talked to a mother out there taking pictures because her daughter had hit the rock. They can look it up since the police were there and should have a report on it. They will call the owners of the car and let them know that it was just noticed that your car was suspected of hitting the car also, not just the rock. It would explain the extra damage to her car.

The daughter might not have noticed that she hit your car. If it all happened so fast she may have hit the rock and closed her eyes and not seen that she hit it. Once she stopped reopened her eyes. Im not saying that's what happened... but it is a possibility.

I would go through the police, your insurance company will probably want the police report on it before fixing it. Plus with the police report you can also take the owner of the car to small claims court for the $500. You will also need the police report for that also.

No matter what route you take it will be better that you have the police report on it. Better to be safe than sorry later on down the road.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Since you know there was a police report done, if the vehicle is not on your street/you can't easily find them, I'd call the cops and say, "I'm the resident at x address. You were out on x day. I have new information for you and I'm hoping you can help me get contact info from the other party to repair my car." Since you have all reason to believe it was her (her mother will not likely be surprised since there was a lot of damage), I would try to get their info.

I had someone wreck my car (I was not in it, it was 3AM) and until he contacted his ins. they wanted nothing to do with me - even though I had the info from his father, the cops had been out, etc. No personal injury is less of a priority. If you can contact the other party, it may be easier for you.

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K.D.

answers from Provo on

There's already a police report on this. They called the police on it. All you are doing is adding to the original report. You don't have to say "Hit and Run" because the girl didn't run. All that happened was that the reporting officer and the girl didn't take into account the damage to your car. The officer didn't know it wasn't pre-existing and the girl was probably so shaky and in shock that she did not recall correctly. Call the police, tell them the story and let them decide how you should file it.
For all those that are recommending that you just get an estimate for repair before you decide to take it to your insurance -- re-read your contract with your insurance company. You may be REQUIRED in that contract to report ALL accidents and damage to your vehicle.

Updated

There's already a police report on this. They called the police on it. All you are doing is adding to the original report. You don't have to say "Hit and Run" because the girl didn't run. All that happened was that the reporting officer and the girl didn't take into account the damage to your car. The officer didn't know it wasn't pre-existing and the girl was probably so shaky and in shock that she did not recall correctly. Call the police, tell them the story and let them decide how you should file it.
For all those that are recommending that you just get an estimate for repair before you decide to take it to your insurance -- re-read your contract with your insurance company. You may be REQUIRED in that contract to report ALL accidents and damage to your vehicle.

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L.M.

answers from Dover on

I would call the police and report previously unseen damage to an accident they already responded to. They can look up the date of the other report and give you the insurance exchange information. She didn't technically "hit and run" since the police already responded and had the car towed...they just missed it at the time.

**added**contact your insurance agent and explain the situation. They should be able to get the information. If not, try to find the neighbor.

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S.W.

answers from Amarillo on

While it is still fresh, call the policy about the hit on your car. Have it on record. If you can find the mother let her know this is why your car got totalled. Get her insurance info and contact your insurance company. Let the two insurance companies handle the problem. Don't say any more to the mom.

Let this be a lesson to the daughter thta you must pay attention to driving and not texting or turning radio channels.

Be honest and matter of fact about it don't worry about the "benefit of the doubt" here. It is her and her parent's responsibility to make things right.

The other Suizanne

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Yeah, but the rock was fine, right?
Sorry.
All kidding aside, I would call the police and tell them that you did not notice anything at the time, but your car that was parked on the street was damaged. There was already an incident report filed and it might need to be amended as you can't be sure how the damages to your parked car occured. It may or may not have anything to do with the other report, but you feel you should mention it.
It's going to have to be turned in to your auto insurance and therefore a report of some kind has to be filed with law enforcement.
Frankly, how no one noticed another damaged car in close proximity if the offending vehicle was indeed "totalled" seems a little strange, but if everyone was focusing on the rock....I guess it's possible.

I don't think it's out of line to mention it. The police don't even have to say anything...."Upon further investigation, there was more damage than previously documented."

Give them the chance to at least investigate it. It may or may not have been her car that hit yours, you don't know. But, you have damages.

My daughter had a friend who got a car for her 16th birthday, before she even had her license. It was brand new....off the show room floor. She got her license and promptly took out a stop sign not paying attention and driving up onto the curb and into the sign. There was a huge fine for that which her parents paid.
Then, she was pulling into the driveway at home and pushed on the accelerator instead of the break and drove through the garage door of her parent's brand new house.
Her parents paid cash for the repairs to her brand new car, her parents paid for the repairs of the garage door of their brand new house and they did it because the didn't want the insurance company to know. The insurance rates were already jacked up about a thousand percent over the stop sign thing and they didn't want that to happen again. However....they still let her drive. They didn't make her pay for anything.

I don't think covering these things up is in the best interests of a young driver, but that's just my opinion.
You don't know who hit what, but your car is damaged.
I don't know that it can be considered a hit and run if indeed the police did come out and file a report.
That's a big IF if you weren't there.

If nothing else, you have to report the damage to your car if you want your insurance to cover it.
They will want to know if you reported it to law enforcement.

I'm not an attorney, but I've worked in the insurance field for many years.
A car getting totalled by hitting a rock? Could happen. The driver's insurance company will be investigating even if you don't say anything.

Best wishes.

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M.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

Since I don't have that girl's address or phone number , I would call the cops.I would explain the whole situation on how you talked to the girl and the mother and nobody mentioned your car being hit as well and you didn't notice it until the next day.

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V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I agre with Rebecca. I'd call the police and report exactly what happened (so far as you know it). I wonder if it would actually be classified as a "hit and run" anyway---- since the vehicle was not occupied or attended by anyone. Seems to me it would be about the same as if she had hit your mailbox or lawn art or the side of your house. Seems like it would just be undiscovered damage.
No?
As far as the deductible, I would think that the other family's insurance would pay for the damages and you wouldn't have a deductible. Assuming that it sorts out that the girl was responsible for the damage.

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M.T.

answers from New York on

I would start with your insurance company. I am so sorry for what happened to your car. I have a teen with a learners permit. I don't think the girl is a spoiled brat, I think she's terrified of what her parents will do if she costs them money - or that they will require her to pay for it herself.

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L.G.

answers from Eugene on

She very likely did not know she hit your car. What was she doing in the neighbor's driveway? Call the police non - emergency line and ask what your recourse is. Then call your insurance company.
Tell everything you remember.
Good Luck.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I would call the police, report the damage, tell the officer that you heard there was an accident the other day, this happened around the same time, etc...they need to investigate it and if they find paint on your vehicle that matches, see any transfer, etc...they will file a report about it and her insurance will pay for your damages.

She should not get a way with damaging someone else's property at all.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Call the Police no matter what else you do.

Then tell them about the "girl" from the day before and let them handle it.
Call your insurance with the Police report info and the Girl story and let them also work on this..

Then see what happens.

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T.Z.

answers from Portland on

As a lawyer, yes I know everyone loves to hate us, I would contact the police. You have a suspicion about what happened, but leave the investigation to the professionals. Your insurance company may require a police report in any event and the damage to the teenage driver's car may not match the damage to your cars.

If responsible, the young driver must be held accountable. Whether or not the event was criminal is not your call. Contact the police and your insurance company to file a claim.

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

"Ah! Hello! I think we just found the missing piece of the puzzle! It wasn't the rock she hit. Or it wasn't JUST the rock... it was the back of this car, as well."

If the car was totaled... and if I'm thinking of the scenario correctly... 1 will get you 10 that daughter hit her head on the roof of the car when it jumped the rock &/or curb. Been there, done that. And your memory gets spotty, if you're (or rather she's) like most people. She could very well think she just hit the rock, becuase that's just the part she remembers.

I'd go let the parents know, and then phone my insurance. They may or may not want a copy of the police report. If they do, then you'll have to phone the police, because the report will need to be added onto.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Of course you have to report it and why would you have to pay the deductible? Call your insurance company to report the damage and mention what happened with the rock on your neighbor's property. Your insurance company will either call the police for a report and some information on that accident or they will ask you to. An appraiser will take a look at your car, take pictures, and will assess whether or not the damage matches the car involved in the rock incident (paint color, etc.) and if there is reason to conclude that it was her, they will go after the teenager's insurance company and they will pay the deductible. Whether or not the police pursue violations for this accident is not your business or your responsibility.

There is no judgment call to be made here - she either hit your car and didn't report it or she didn't. If she did, she needs to deal with the consequences. Driving is serious, dangerous business and if she can't handle it, perhaps she should wait until she's older to drive again.

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J.M.

answers from Seattle on

Haven't you filed your own police report for the damage to your car? I would ask the police and your insurance company to investigate. They have pretty good leads.

Good Luck.

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M.B.

answers from San Francisco on

The teen knows she hit your car but in her mind she chose the lesser of the two evils and told her Mom she hit a rock.

Call the police, make a report and request a copy of the report that was filed by teen driver (public record) and tell them you believe the damage to your property and vehicle was a result of the reported accident, submit both copies to your incurance company.

I was that teen driver some 10 years ago and I didn't like it at the time but I now fully understand and appreciate the driver of the car I dinged holding me to my responsibility in the matter.

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C.Z.

answers from Omaha on

First off, just because this girl is a teenage driver DOES NOT mean that she was texting/driving. You were once a teenage driver and I wonder how many stupid things you did...I know I have done my fair share of bad moves.

Secondly, I see MANY adults driving/texting so I don't think this is only something teens do. I think it is across the board on who is guilty.

Thirdly, and most importantly, kids brains do not stop developing until close to mid 20's so although you would like to hold her responsible (as she should be), you can't simply assume she is trying to weasel out of this situation. Contact the authorities and let them handle it. This girl didn't do this on purpose and I am sure the proper things will happen to make everyone whole again.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

Not all teen drivers are bad so please don't hating them all. They do make mistakes just like we do... they are learning... they are not perfect... neither are we.

That said... as a mom of a 17 yr old responsible daughter who of course makes mistakes...... I would want to know so that my daughter would understand the depth of what she did and what could have happened. I would expect her to be held responsible for her actions as much as I hated it.

If your car was actually hit, how did the police who were there not see it when they were investigating?

The police have a report on this already. If you notify them of your damage, they can retrace what happened and take care of any actions as far as ticketing the driver, etc.

I also find it hard to believe that hitting a rock could total a car. Does not make sense to me... It sounds like she was not driving responsibly but let's not automatically assume she was speeding, texting, on the phone, etc. You don't know what you don't know.

I it really sad that you have such a negative attitude toward teens. They are not all bad and someday you will have one and I hope you won't be so judgemental. They are not all spoiled brats who deserve hate.

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D..

answers from Charlotte on

I guess I would be worried that somehow they will assess you with the responsibility of her car being totalled. I don't know how they would do it, but I will say that if you don't call the police and insurance company NOW, that your coming back and telling them that your car was damaged won't mean much.

I'm so sorry,
Dawn

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

i would only feel obligated to talk to the family first if they were friends, or at least close enough neighbors that i felt i had a relationship with them. it's not copping out to call the police and your insurance company and tell THEM what your suspicions are. the police should have seen that when they came the first time. let them investigate, it's their job. you shouldn't end up with a deductible over this, unless they can't conclude that this accident caused your car's damage. but i'll bet they draw the simple A to B line pretty easily.
khairete
S.
ps re: your update, you are a good egg, mum4ever. not many people would have posted that honest update. i hope the trash company makes good and this works out well for you.

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L._.

answers from San Diego on

I would like to give the girl the benefit of the doubt. But I'm troubled by the idea that she would not know she hit the car. Unless she hit her head, would not her car have come to REST attatched to the back side of YOUR car?

Marda, I realize you have been in this line of work, but for real? How could she not know?

It's not YOUR job to pay the 500 dollar deductible. YOU need to call the police. Because the police had been there, it won't take any work for them to connect the dots. They can also match up paint and such if they have not already fixed the car this fast. I don't think it would be right to allow this to stand. It concerns me GREATLY that the cracker jack police officers going out there did not figure this out? How in the world did they not see it if your car was parked right there?

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A.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

Call the popo. She's already had plenty of opportunity to fess up and chose not to. Sounds like she fessed up as much as she had to to seem like she was doing the right thing and just hoped the rest would go unnoticed. This is the job of the police, so lettem do it. After all, its not like this is your dear friend of 30 years. Cops all the way. Good luck.

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A.W.

answers from Seattle on

I would do exactly what Jan said....call the police and your insurance and file a report. They will take care of it from there.

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S.P.

answers from New York on

I would try to contact the parents first, and let them know before you contact the agency. I would not consider it a hit-and-run since they were in front of your house and discussing the accident, so obviously she was fessing up to something. I think she may have been so rattled that she didn't realize exactly what she hit. Obviously, they need to pay for the damage, but if I could help it I wouldn't report it as a hit-and-run.

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

I disagree with every piece of advice so far. (thought that might get your attention) :)

1) Get an estimate on the bumper at a garage.

2) THEN if it's worth more than the deductible, or more enough that its worth your hassle - then you start the decision process on cops versus parents versus punishment versus 'she's a good girl and i'll let it go'.

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

That sucks! I would go to the neighbor and give her a chance to get to the bottom of it. She may pay for the damage herself or give you her insurance information. However, make sure you let her know that you felt it only right to come to her first before calling the police. You'll have to pay the $500 up front, and then get reimbursed later. At least that's always been my experience.

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A.C.

answers from Savannah on

I would tell the parents first. Why? Because they need to help their daughter work on a few things there.
If it were my sons, I would absolutely want to know. I'd be upset if I DIDN'T know. Not to get them in "trouble" but to continue my parenting JOB: teaching them about driving issues that come up and how to control the car (I could understand that it was an accident, but instruction on how to maintain control is important---I hit something one time but kept the car out of a spin because my dad taught me), ways to avoid an accident to begin with, and then some lessons on honor and fessing up when something's happened. Your car could have been a kid on a scooter. Bad enough it's your car. She has had a day to realize what's happened and process it. Now she needs to face whatever consequences her parents deem right (my sons would have some consequence for lying, but not over the top, because I can understand panic.....but it needs to be addressed, and I would also want my sons to work for the increase in my car insurance rates, etc).
I wouldn't think she's a spoiled brat as much as just scared. And that's natural. But it still needs to be faced and addressed, because "natural" doesn't mean "right", it just makes it understandable.
And incidentally, I wouldn't care if it was $50 or $500, if my kids have an accident and hide it, then they WOULD be working extra to pay for it.

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C.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

Sounds fishy to me!! If she possibly "rammed" Into your car would there not be more damage to it?? Would you not been able to hear a crash and your alarm go off? Weird! If I lived in a home, where a car dove into a rock that's in-between my neighbors home and mine, I would go check any of my cars which were parked near the crash.

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H.G.

answers from Portland on

I would look for them and ask them to come over to your house & take a second look at a specified time & have the police come at the very same time & file a report with the police.

N.P.

answers from San Francisco on

Thanks so much for the detailed "So what happened"! I hate reading a story only to get to the end and never find out what happened. <3

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