Thinking About Homeschooling - Leavenworth,KS

Updated on April 30, 2014
K.M. asks from Newburgh, NY
12 answers

I have been thinking about homeschooling for a while now, but I'm still hesitant to make the leap. I have a lot of friends who do it with great results. I have a Bachelor's and Master's degree in education, so I feel comfortable teaching and preparing lessons. My kids are in 3rd, Kinder, and preschool. My oldest would love to homeschool. My middle son LOVES going to school and I'm worried he'll really miss it. I'm either going to homeschool all or send them all to school.

My main reason for wanting to homeschool is that I don't think the kids are learning enough at school--especially my 3rd grader. We are new to our state (military), so I'm not sure if it's the school (#2 in our district) or the Core Curriculum.

I love their school a lot (parents/staff/kids) and they both have great teachers. I love school in general. I taught before having kids, my mom just retired from teaching, and my MIL just retired from school counseling. My preschooler goes to school 9 hours a week and I use most of that time volunteering at school. I'm afraid I'll miss the socialization and school atmosphere.

My question for homeschooling parents or parents who have homeschooled:

1. Were you hesitant, but happy you made the leap?
2. Is it easy to transition them back to traditional school, if I decide to only homeschool for a few years?

Also, I love my kids dearly and I'm already a SAHM, but I'm a little worried about my sanity if I have them 24/7/365. Is it overwhelming?

Thanks for your input!

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So What Happened?

Thank you all about the honest and heartfelt responses! I still have a lot to thing about, but I'm getting more comfortable with the idea of homeschooling.

Featured Answers

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

While I don't personally homeschool. I have a ton of friends and family who do. All with great results. If you do it, homeschooling has come a long way with materials, lesson plans and co-ops! Best of luck to you!

2 moms found this helpful

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

yes, i was very, very torn about making the leap, and my husband was downright hinky. and we're both beyond glad we did it. i've said it here many times before, but it was hands-down the best parenting decision we ever made.
no clue about the transition back because we didn't homeschool with that in mind. if you keep that in your crosshairs you need to keep a finger on the pulse of your local curricula and tailor your homeschool to accommodate it, which completely wiped out the benefits of homeschooling for us.
you (and your middle son, who sounds like my younger) probably WILL miss the school atmosphere at first. i loved school when i was a kid, and mine were okay there too. we only made the leap because okay wasn't good enough. but remember, you're going to find co-ops and groups and homies and besties, and you will not miss the socialization at all.
seriously.
you will be declining lots and lots of wonderful adventures because there are only so many hours in the day.
you will almost certainly feel overwhelmed and question your sanity 100 times a day at first. don't panic. being with your kids that much, and all that heavy weight of responsibility will make you a little nuts when you're finding your feet. and then you'll figure it out.
you will.
and then comes the joy.
being with your kids all the time is SOOOO different when you're homeschooling, because you're co-creators of adventures and opportunities. not to mention you'll soon become inundated with gazillions of offers for your kids to do things with other kids and you figure out how to work in enough mental-health-recovery time.
do it.
you will be so glad you did.
ETA the plethora of hybrid options out there sounds great on the surface, but it actually worries me. most hybrids offer the worst of both worlds- being stuck at home with no other kids around AND having a boxed syllabus to 'keep up with.' while more choices are usually good, keep in mind the benefits of homeschooling which are flexibility and the freedom to learn and then arc your 'schooling' to fit your child. just doing the (substandard) work they're doing in most public schools but all alone is no improvement.
khairete
S.

5 moms found this helpful

C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

This is our first year of homeschooling. My girls are in 4th and 6th grades. I decided to homeschool because I just wasn't happy with their school, the district, the curriculum - I just felt they weren't going to be prepared to go to competitive high schools when the time came.

That being said, I'm not a natural teacher. I never wanted to be a teacher! I'm a construction manager by trade, and my husband and I run our company together. I was very hesitant about homeschooling. But I felt strongly that the girls weren't getting what they needed in public school, and the private schools in our area are $20K per child per year, so that was out of the question.

I think one of the biggest misconceptions I had about homeschooling was that I'd be standing in front of my kids like a public school teacher, writing lessons on a blackboard. Like a tiny, one-room schoolhouse. Well, nothing could be further from what homeschooling is actually like! Most homeschool curriculum is actually directed toward the child, so that they can read their lessons independently (once they get to an age where their reading skills allow for that, of course). I do spend time with each of my girls helping them and discussing ideas, essay topics, etc, but I actually spend very little time doing lesson planning. We go on a lot of field trips (it's wonderful to be able to go to a museum mid-day during the week and have the place all to yourself). We belong to a homeschool group and attend park days, volunteer days, and other fun events with them. I did imagine that homeschooling would send me over the edge - the thought of quite that much togetherness with my girls seemed overwhelming. However, they're actually much calmer than they were when going to public school, and because there are only two of them, they're able to get their work done in 4 hours or so, leaving the rest of the day for them to pursue other activities that interest them.

We had to make a decision last month as to whether we would sign our older daughter up for public junior high. I thought she might miss going to school with her friends, but she actually begged to be homeschooled for junior high. (She sees her friends all the time after school, so she's not missing out on having friends.)

I have no doubt that going back to public school would be fine for my girls, if that's the path they wanted to take. Academically they're pretty far ahead of their peers. Socially, they have no issues. They just don't want to go back, and really, I can't blame them. We're having a fun time homeschooling, so we will continue. If you feel like homeschooling is something you'd like to try, go for it. If you change your mind later, it's no big deal. You're not stuck with this decision for life. :)

4 moms found this helpful
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E.B.

answers from Denver on

It sounds like there's a lot of great things about your school situation as it is now. You say you like the teachers, staff, other parents, etc. And it sounds like you're just not satisfied with the curriculum level that your 3rd grader gets. So why not try some supplementation? Since you're an educated person, do some really creative learning experiences with your 3rd grader. Have a math challenge at home, or start a creative project that involves learning (building a complex model, or get him a microscope, or plan a trip to a planetarium and spend the weeks before the trip learning about the planets and stars and doing a cool presentation to the family about Saturn or something). Learn a foreign language or sign language together. When you make supper, talk to your kids about what 1/4 cup is, and how many teaspoons in a tablespoon and give them pop quizzes. Stimulate their brains at home and keep volunteering at school and see if that helps at all.

I have homeschooled and sent my kids to private and public school (military too, so lots of different school situations). Homeschooling can be important and it's not just for when the public school is under-performing. There are lots of reasons to do it. But it you're so satisfied with 90% of the school situation, maybe you could do some gap-filling in an educational and creative way. Make your home a place where education and creativity and brain stimulation are important.

4 moms found this helpful

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

You're interested for exactly why I was: Not enough material being taught in school. It's TRUE!!!!! Many people don't realize it because if they're in a school with a "good rating" and their kids are getting good grades they have no idea what's lacking compared to what used to be taught in schools (huge plummet since 50's and even 70's) and WAY LESS than in many other countries.

If you are eager to teach you don't even need to prepare lessons, there are SUPERIOR advanced materials readily available for you already and you can build off of those-or not, just follow them. I HIGHLY recommend reading The Well Trained Mind Guide to Classical Education. You will be BLOWN AWAY by how much more kids learn in each grade under a system like that than they do in regular public school.

I've been homeschooling for a few years but had to plop my kids in public school for the last few weeks this year to prepare to move all of a sudden. I couldn't teach AND pack. My oldest is the only second grader who writes cursive in her class (they don't teach it here in any schools anymore) and prints neatly. She writes long paragraphs describing what she's read in classic books-her classmates can barely read. She's way ahead in math. She's had lots of science and hands-on activities and history-her classmates haven't. She's been playing musical instruments for 4 years already and is awesome at Taekwondo because we used to have TIME after academics for all of those things while homeschooling and STILL had time to rest, play and be social. Now I'm pulling her from TKD and she's barely practicing her instruments because school takes up all her time. Her homework is ridiculously basic but she has to do it and it takes time.

Meanwhile she LOVES school because there are kids there. She just got "best student" for month of April and her picture is in the hallway. She gets almost no attention from teacher in class because she already knows everything being taught and the classes are geared to help the kids that are behind catch up. So she feels great and confident, but she's not learning anything new. Her little brother is in kindergarten and loves it too-because it's social, but he's way ahead as well so he isn't learning much. It's OK for a few weeks but we're moving to France so they can learn a second language. If we have to stay here I will homeschool again.

But I don't want to. So I hope we can move. I never wanted to be a teacher. I'm good at it and passionate about the material and my kids' education but I need to earn money and get back to work, not teach them all day. I wish they could learn as much in school.

But you should do it. For at least a year. They will excel and it is very exciting to watch them learn so much, in LESS HOURS per day and to be able to see what they're excelling at so you can move ahead and to stay with what needs more work, and to dive more deeply into the things they're drawn to. There is no comparison. You can do so much more at home. And you can just take off and go see whatever museum, farm, coal mine, city, you want anytime. Your'e not stuck to a school schedule. My whole extended family on my mom's side homeschooled. Their kids are everything from parents to Navy Seals to missionaries to scientists to musicians. They all worked jobs early and had lots of extra community experiences and started college early with excellent grades.

4 moms found this helpful
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C.D.

answers from Atlanta on

Of course it will get overwhelming, doesn't everything at some point or another. Of course hesitancy is involved, hesitance can give time for reflection and time for letting the matter to rest and return. And yes we wonder can we really do this, will I know how to teach and what to teach and when to teach and be able to have a life and do all the other things that need done.

Homeschooling is a life. Dedication is fully called for and necessary. Knowing you're parenting/teaching style is imperative and learning to keep balance in that. But this is the case whether you homeschool or not. Taking the child to heart and to sleep each night helps greatly, much guidance comes from this. If you're homeschooling is basically a replica of a public school at home there isn't much to be gained.

Returning to a public school is easy. Unless of course someone wants to give you a hassle because of their own judgments.

Social aspects are easily dealt with with homeschool groups and friends. besides its the quality not quantity.

He may miss the school atmosphere at first and may think things should be like they were at school. But when he realizes his precious little freedoms, he'll be glad. Change takes time and practice and isn't easy even when it's the best thing.

Ask yourself what this hesitancy is really about. Make a list of pros and cons. Write out what you want for your children and what qualities you'd like to instill, etc. In other words get your thoughts out in front of you, to see them a little more clearly. This is not an easy lifestyle but it is rewarding. But you have to want it, you have to know you're motives, intentions and reasons.

There is much to be said about children working along side parent, especially mother. So much is gained in just the natural unfoldment of the day, yes even in household chores and the many things that make up the days. Cooking becomes a reading, math, following instruction lesson, yet no one mentions it's a lesson, everyone is just enjoying baking muffins and creating. And the pleasure of making for others is always rewarding. But this is one small example. Lessons can be taken outside with chalk in hand and draw a big clock to learn time. Just another small example. Time to sit at the table together and learn and enjoy. You'll know if they're learning and enjoying when you look in their eyes. Are they bright and eager, are their cheeks rosy, are they ready to pick up pencil or crayon when the time comes to it. You know you're children and their needs. The biggest thing is love, enjoyment, living in a home full of learning, experiencing, discovering, singing, appreciation for engaging and fully immersing one self in life in all its wonders. Children need warmth and allowed to sense their wonder. Public schools steal this from them. To get to a child's mind you must go through the heart. The schools have completely forgotten this generations ago.

Perhaps you should test homeschooling out a bit and try out a few weeks of teaching a certain subject this summer. Just don't tell the children you're running a test.

If you decide to do it, be sure to check out your states requirements. Most states don't officially require enrollment till age 6 or 7. And check out the different curriculums. I don't know your situation or beliefs but you can often get used, of course cheaper. And no matter your beliefs as to education or otherwise, compare the many curriculums, because the "right" one makes all the difference. Many people write up their own after much study and find they can hone in on the needs of the child. I use a curriculum but also change it up where needed it according to the interest of the child. This way I have a launching pad or foundation from which to grow and expand accordingly. Study is going to be involved no matter how you cut it, even if you're teaching first grade. Because how you teach is just as important as what you teach. A couple you may want to check into are Charolette Mason., Oak Meadow, Christopherous, Live.

You'll want to be sure you have an outlet for yourself, as you'll need it. Most homeschool moms are so involved with this life that everything they do is around it and their friends do the same.

Well, this is long and I could go on. But I hope you'll have something here that will give food for thought. The Best To You.

4 moms found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Chattanooga on

I would suggest trying to join a homeschool co-op in your area. Then your kids can still get the socialization and learn to take direction from an adult other than yourself. Plus, it would be hugely beneficial for you to be with other like-minded mothers who are experienced in doing this. (Plus, less pressure on you.)

I just googled "home-school groups in (city, state)" and got quite a list. Many of them are more than happy to talk with you about it as well. I thought about homeschooling my dd, and was doing the research on it. I decided that I did not have the time to dedicate to homeschooling at this point (as I am a student myself)... But I did learn a lot!

Also, my husband and his little sister were home schooled (they were a construction family, so they moved around a lot.) my husband went back to public school whenever their dad got a job that would keep them there the entire school year, and transitioned well each time. His sister chose to be purely home-schooled, and while she did struggle a bit when she started college, she got into the flow of things pretty quickly.

3 moms found this helpful

A.B.

answers from St. Louis on

Hello K.,
I home school 2 kids (8 & 14 yo), and my older son, home schooled as well, who is in college know pursuing a nice career in computer science.
Some people pull out their kids half way, and others wait until the school year ends. With the older one, I pulled him out from Public School when he was in 6th grade, and my 14 yo when he was in 3rd grade. My little one has never attended Public School, he has been home schooled since 4 yo. (learning for ever) I can say honestly that I (we) do not regret my (our)decision to home school. The life changes when you decide to do it; it changes in routine, everything, and even friends may change sometimes. You will find people who oppose to home schooling and those who favour it, but remember it is YOUR decision and what works for you, your kids and your family.
If you want to do it right you have to organize yourself, re think your priorities, your life style sometimes, and be patient. Some families are very relaxed, and others are not. I am in the middle, but we do have structure, school hours, rules but lots of fun. We combine library days, park days, field trips, in-home instruction, and home schooling groups to make everything interesting, fun, and let the kids share time with other kids and "socialize", which is the thing most first time home schooling moms are concerned about; do not be, socialization is going to be there, no doubt.
When I pulled my kids out from PS, I "de schooled" them, that is the first thing I did, that means we took 10 days off to help them to relax, to help the kids get used to other ways of learning, and find our way towards a new and challenging journey for all of us. We spent those days having fun, watching family movies and educational DVD's, reading a lot, visiting museums, parks, playgrounds, pool (indoor depending on the weather), and organizing our "study room". We got the textbooks, curriculum, new school supplies, a round table and a couple of desks, just preparing everything TOGETHER for our "adventure". My kids enjoyed very much since they were (and are) part of a very important decision and everything that came with it. Among other reasons, we also decided to home school because they were not learning enough in spite of A's and B's and being "honor roll", and so, still they were lacking in so many things important for High School, College...life...
I was never hesitant to make the change, but I didn't know anything about home schooling until my own husband came with the idea. We still love the idea, and the kids as well!
Take one day at a time, one year at a time, you always can take them back to school if you want it, but if you do it right, they will never want to come back to "outside school" as my kids say, believe me!
About your sanity? It is the same having your kids attending Public School or private School. You do have the kids 24/7, but you do school lets say from 8 to 1, and then every one is on her/his own: sports, activities, picnics, b-days, etc. There are good days, and difficult days, and yes sometimes I feel overwhelmed, but mostly because I need to balance chores, errands, doctors' appointments, illness, school planning, spouse, etc...That is the reason I advice you to be organized to minimize this challenge.
If you feel tired or overwhelmed, you have the flexibility to take a day off and give the kids assignments to do at least for a couple of hours, the same if you are sick or they are ill. Those days the kids are in sport or any activity, you can drop them off and visit a friend, go to the hair salon, nap at home and then pick them up. I do not see the problem in finding a "me" time. Besides, everyone is required to help at home, isn't? Home schooling is a different life, everyone is at home, and everyone cooperates age accordingly, yay!
Curricula? plenty out there depending on what you want your kids to learn; you can use units of study, a religious-based curriculum, a secular one, plan your own from different resources, etc. There are many! . PM if you need more info or more help.
The most rewarding thing is that you get to know your children so well and they get to know you better; they learn to be independent, they learn to know how to deal with problems (academics or not) and find a solution or learn from it. I love my kids dearly as you do. I am SAHM after having a successful career, but we made the decision together with my husband to raise and educate our kids ourselves; some parents do it some others do not, but none of us is wrong, it is just what works for each family.

Good Luck!
A. :)

3 moms found this helpful
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X.Y.

answers from Chicago on

Kids are not a "one size fits all" mold, so treat them individually. It sounds like you have a lot of pluses; your a teacher, other family members are teachers, and you have a lot of homeschooling friends already.

This is my first year homeschooling my two girls 6 & 8 and my 4th grade son still goes to the private school they were in. This was my girls idea to be homeschooled because they heard about a coop that has some amazing extra curricular programs that they would never had been able to do being at school all day.

They convinced me to homeschool them next year too. I don't think I will go beyond next year but I will take it one school year at a time. If it wasn't for this coop, I would never have done it. My girls go to class on Mondays (all day), then the coop provides the lesson plans for the week. It was a lot of work on me initially because I don't have an education background but now I think I've got the hang of it. All the teachers at the coop have their bachelors, most have masters and some have PHD, so I feel confident and know that they will guide me if I ever needed them.

The girls and I have a huge social calendar filled so much that there is no way we can go to everything. We also still attend all my sons school activities. If I want to volunteer at his school, I'm usually able to bring the girls but if I can't there is a lady that babysits a block over for me and she will take my girls anytime.

I say go for it, with the one that wants to at least. My son loves his classmates and his school, he didn't want to make the change and I'm happy with that decision as I feel it's important to treat all my kids as individuals.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

A couple of thoughts: you want to do all or none, but not every school is right for every kid. I knew a family who sent one child to a private school and the rest to public, because that was the best course for one kid. Or a boarding school for just one child. Or homeschooling for just one kid. So if it's really not in your middle child's best interest, I would focus on the other two and see how you can do a little of each. You can also "unschool" or supplement after school hours.

I am not a homeschooler, but friends are or friends graduated from a homeschooling program. It is a boat load of work, to do it right. The ones that seem most successful have a co-op or other support group and they are flexible. Maybe that means Dad homeschools in HS because he has a math degree or that one child attends HS part time or goes to the community college for a class or two. I understand that a lot of materials are geared toward independent study. I would look around at the materials, the costs, and the suggested time commitments. It seems that one of my friends is always on the go, but she also has 3 kids who are not only homeschooled but in other activities like scouting.

And if YOU will miss something by not being involved in the school, don't discount that. Maybe you will find similar in a co-op.

What I would probably do is finish out the year, do some supplemental schooling as a trial in the summer, and see how it goes.

2 moms found this helpful

I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

My solution to taking this leap was to do a hybrid program. I home school 3 out of the 5 days. The hybrid options are popping up all over and run about half the cost of private school. I did not regret it but not sure I'm up for another year of it. But thats because of the ages of my younger kids. If all my kids were school age i can see where it would be very doable. But it is a lot of family togetherness. And that is a blessing and at times a curse, depending on the day.

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S.H.

answers from Dallas on

Think about when you were a kid. Did you want to just hang with your mom and learn or go to school with friends and learn? I would not want to be home schooled, but some kids would. Social learning is just as important as book learning.

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