Have not had a chance yet to read any thing anyone else has posted (or am I the first one? haha) but as far as drinking while breastfeeding, there are no real steadfast rules, other than, obviously, drinking enough to get a good buzz or get drunk and doing it often are NOT good things! ;)
You can talk to a local CLC or IBCLC and see what they recommend, but, as you said, it is hard to find info regarding this, simply because there are no controlled studies surrounding alcohol and breastfeeding, which I'm thankful for because it means that someone has enough decency to not let breastfeeding moms get plastered all the time and then go nurse their poor babes who have no say about it!
A good rule of thumb that we like to tell moms (I'm an LC at a hospital and also a CBE and certified doula) is that one drink per day is a good limit. Every person metabolizes alcohol differently and that includes the baby. Another good rule of thumb is to be aware of your baby's feedings and wait until right after she has nursed to drink that beer. Theoretically, this is going to give your body the most time possible between the time you drank the beer until the time she nurses again to hopefully give your body enough time to metabolize the alcohol so she's not get much, if any. But, hey, here's something fun to know!....some LC's will suggest that moms with low milk supply drink a little beer each day because the hopps increases your supply!
I know what you mean....I'm not a big drinker AT ALL, but after all those months of pregnancy going with non at all, I miss it after each baby, too. I occassionally do have a beer or margarits and have never noticed an ill effects on my son (same with my oldest two kiddos)
Hope that helps!
A.