Go to the ENT and do not worry about this anymore. I have one child who had 6 sets of tubes between the ages of 18 mo and 5 years, and they just grow out and may need to be replaced, but you do not need to remove them, so unless a great deal has changed. Some times they get clogged, and tubes do not prevent ear wax but unless your ENT did something different, you should not need them removed at all.
Maybe what you need is a different ENT who will explain things to you a little better, so you might seek a second opinion, or one you groove with a little better.
If she had an ear infection, she may have needed a new set. Ear infections do scar ears, but tubes generally are there to keep your child from developing the infections to begin with, your converstation should be with the ENT, after they look in the ear and tell you what is going on, and don't worry about scaring unless they tell you about some unusual situation. If your child is still gettting ear infections and has fluid, you should choose to get tubes, and know that they are not permanent structures.
M.