Toddler Constantly Sick Ever Since Starting Day Care Almost a Year Ago

Updated on January 22, 2011
S.Y. asks from New York, NY
24 answers

My sweet Josh, who is almost three and a half years old, used to get sick once every 4-6 months with colds or viruses, until he started daycare last April. Since then he's been sick every two weeks over the spring, summer, and fall with colds and viruses, big and small. We had a one month respite (we needed it!!) while I had surgery in November/December only to have Josh catch another virus and develop an ear infection over New Years. Pedi prescribed 10 days of antibiotics. He finished them last week and developed a bad cough this past week. Pedi, who saw him just yesterday, said he had pus in his throat and it should get better on its own. As we went to put Josh down for the night just now, he complained he couldn't lie down because his ears hurt. He's had two ear infections in his life and he never complained about them. For him to complain means this is big! We're going to the pedi tomorrow.

You may be wondering what we're doing to help Josh get better. Well, for starters I nursed him for fourteen months, which is supposed to boost his immune system. Next, we give him all sorts of vitamins, from Omega-3 to sumbocol, to probiotics. He eats a healthy diet and gets the rest he needs. We spend as much time outside as possible, especially in the summer. What else could we be doing? Is this normal!??? A lot of parents I talk to say their child was never sick as much as Josh, which is great for them but makes me wonder if something more serious is going on. We asked our pedi about a tonsilectomy and he referred us to an ENT for evaluation

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So What Happened?

Thanks to all those who responded. I'm depressed to write that my little boy is not any better! He's been on three courses of antibotics in the last month and a half for two mean viruses that apparently turned bacterial, and for strep. He just finished his third course of antbiotics and is now running a 101.4 fever. I'm despondent, to say the least. We just saw a great pediatric ENT who said his adenoids looked fine and tonsils were slightly to moderately enlarged, but no reason to cut them out. He basically couldn't offer any counsel but suggested we go to a Pediatric Allergist/Immunologist. We've scheduled an appt for three weeks from now. In the meanwhile, my little boy is sick again. :(

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

My pedi said that the first year that kids are "out and about" in the world, they get sick, on average, 10 times for 10 days each. That's being sick almost all the time. You're not doing anything wrong, it's just how germs work. Hopefully he gets it all out of the way now, and he's healthy as a horse when kindergarten rolls around. Good luck.

2 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

Some kids just get sick more often. A little girl that I used to watch would get sick at LEAST twice a month. My little one hardly ever gets sick (like once a year *knocking on wood*) but she stays home with me.

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K.L.

answers from Philadelphia on

I think it could be that he hasn't been exposed to much prior to starting daycare so hadn't built up much of an immune system yet. I remember the year my son started pre-k he was sick from September to may, every 2 weeks it was something new. I thought I may just lose my mind. Luckily we had the summer for a break.
Is it a large daycare? Maybe you could consider moving him somewhere smaller. I don't know.
Also, my yds suffered with ear infections. Every cold his brother brought home from school, he would get too but his always turned into ear infections. After the ENT saw him and started talking about putting in tubes, I decided it was time to research other options. I took him to a chiropractor (a non-force chiropractor, big difference). She recommended Traumeel ear drops. You can buy them at most health food stores, including Whole Foods. Put 1/2 a vial in the infected ear, 2-3 times a day. It has cleared up every ear infection he has ever gotten since. And since seeing her, he rarely gets them anymore. She also told me that the antibiotics were lowering my kids immune systems. Seriously, since I began taking my kids to her, they rarely get sick anymore.
Good luck and I hope your poor baby gets better soon!

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Y.B.

answers from Seattle on

Have you thought about going to see a naturopath? He could have an allergy to wheat or dairy which is causing problems. Are you giving him Vit D? Hope he feels better soon.

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

It sounds to me like you are doing everything right!
My mom used to be so proud of the fact that my brother, sister and I were never sick as kids. Well when I graduated and started working at age 21 I was getting sick all the time. I had double ear infections, strep throat, and many sinus infections etc. for the first time in my life. Now my brother is in his late 30's and is picking up everything from stomach viruses to bronchitis. UGH! I think /hope that these illnesses are building up his immune system for a later date and perhaps he won't be as susceptible later in life.
Also, my 2nd grader has missed 14 days of school since mid November (2 sinus infection, one UTI and a stomach virus) UGH!!!!

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L.A.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter has been the same way! I thought it was just us!

She was home almost exclusively with me for the first year of her life. We went to the park but no playgroups, not even a church nursery until just about her 1st birthday. Since then, and at two different churches, we consider it a good month if we go 2 weeks w/o a cold.

We were already wondering if we really, really liked our church's nursery...maybe this is a cosmic sign that we should move on.

It's such a relief to find that we're not the only family experiencing this!

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C.C.

answers from Sacramento on

As our pediatrician said to us when our oldest daughter caught her first cold at age 1: "Get used to it. She'll have at least a runny nose from now until first grade." He was right!

It's totally normal. Sorry your little guy is having a rough time of it. He will get past it at some point. =(

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

Two of my kids did this when we first started going to our church. Every week they got sick for 10 months. I thought there was something they were allergic too. I stopped letting them put hand sanitizer on my kids and they got better. They didn't have a sink in the room and I thought that was the problem and mentioned it to the workers. But they used hand sanitizer and once they stopped using that, they got better. They are older now but I have a baby and I don't put him in the nursery, needless to say. My guess is that he's allergic to something. It could be cleaner or mold or anything. Maybe they're feeding him something that he's allergic to. Maybe it's something different at home that you started at the same time. Good luck!

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

This is the peril of preschool and daycare: or any larger group: all those things our little ones didn't get sick with before just jump on them. He's catching up. My son is in a similar situation; he moved from my preschool of 4 kids to a group of 14 daily (20 or so total) and wham! every other week, it's something new coming out of somewhere! We give him a good multi-vitamin, completely eliminate dairy when he's symptomatic, and just try to support his getting well the best we can.

It's a hell of a lot better at three, though, than it was at 6 months or even a year or so ago. They seem to take colds and bugs better than they used to (in my opinion). They're more distractable, which really helps.

The best thing we can do to for the kids is to teach them to wash their hands well, to use tissues, all that. I agree with Jaimee; I see more sick kids in groups where hand sanitizer is frequently used than I do with plain old soap and water. Yvonne is right on, too, about naturopaths; they are wonderful in how they take such good information from us and put it together as a holistic picture. Pediatric chiroracters and cranio-sacral therapists might be able to significantly help, too.

For what it's worth, I spent my first 3 years working at daycares getting sick. It's now rare for me to be down with a cold or flu. So there's a plus!

H.

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R.P.

answers from Cleveland on

kids get sick ESPECIALLY if they are around other kids. all the time. if you can maybe take him out of the day care and see if it gets better, and normally they only do a tonsilectomy if they have sore throats like weekly

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D.M.

answers from New York on

I hope this doesn't sound too crazy to you, but have you tried chiropractic care for Josh?

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J.F.

answers from Philadelphia on

I was sick a lot all through school too. Some people are just like that. I worked in day care and it was hell for me. I think it is normal for some people.

S.M.

answers from Kansas City on

My daughter did stop getting all the upper resperitory stuff after removing her tonsils.

It sounds like you are doing the right things. I do have to ask about him and his hand washing practices? Is he the kind of little one that puts a lot of things into his mouth? Some kids do for a long time, even into 4 and 5 years of age. You can never keep them well if they are sticking germs in the mouth and no matter what the provider does, there will be germs.

If this is a big daycare, I would immediately switch him to an in home care with a very small group. Also, going outside is great they say. But the more we are exposed to germs in stores and play lands and public bathrooms the harder it is to break the cycle. It sounds like his immune system has been worn down.

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

My son started day care when my maternity leave was finished when he was 3 months old. It seemed like he was sick a lot for about 2 years before it settled down and then he hardly ever got sick.
My sister and I were home until we started kindergarten. I can remember getting sick a lot up through the first grade. More than once I was sent to the nurses office throwing up all the way down the hall. and then by 2nd grade I hardly ever got sick at all.
It's just my personal theory, but it seems like it takes roughly 2 years for the immune system to really ramp up and be able to fight pretty much what ever is going around. The immune system has to learn how to fight and this takes time. (I did have my tonsils/adenoids out during that period, my son had his out when he was 4 yrs old).
It will get better eventually. Hang in there!

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C.C.

answers from New York on

My daughter started with a constant runny nose when she started daycare at 11 months of age. But then it would turn into either an ear infection or adenoid infection. It was antibiotics followed by more antibiotics, with the running nose stopping only during the time she was on the antibiotics. It was awful. I finally saw a pediatric ENT who decided her adenoids had to come out. The surgery went fine, he said the adenoids were massive and a mess and needed to come out (no ear tubes necessary)...and she hasn't had an infection since. It's been 2 1/2 years. There's no harm in having the ENT look at Josh. It's awful to have your child be so sick all the time, I understand. Good luck.

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T.F.

answers from New York on

I complained that my then- 2year old was sick all the time (colds that would lead to coughing and wheezing) to his specialist, who is an immunologist. He said it was a good thing, it was building up his immunity before he goes to elementary school when being sick will result in missing school. He's now 3, in nursery school 3x/week, and still gets sick all the time although not as severely (now mostly just runny nose and mild coughing). I figure someone who specializes in it should know what they're talking about. It wouldn't hurt to go to an ENT, but don't do any surgery without careful consideration. I also breastfed, btw, til about 17 mos.

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J.D.

answers from New York on

He'll get over it. We have to get sick to get immune but theres a million different virus' and bacterial infections out there. IF not now, then he'd be going through this when he goes to kindergarten. I think it takes almost 2 yrs to become immune to most things (thats just totally my experience though and nothing scientific)...hand washing/sanitizing is key for children and adults. Really enforce that and no touching of his eyes, nose or mouth b/c thats the quickest way germs spread, teach him to sneeze into his arm if he doesn't already, and make sure he only wipes his nose with tissues/wipes then throws them out and sanitizes. Sounds like a lot to ask a child but at his age, its really not...of course they aren't going to be perfect about it all, so they are going to get sick. Virus' don't react to antibiotics and most of what he's going to be getting is viral...my child started daycare as a baby and the first two years we had a lot of illnesses...your child is older now but I see friends with older children who are dealing with a lot of illness now b/c they are out and about more and around children more than when they were babies...sounds like your doing all you can...practice the good hygiene rules and hang in there. EVERYONE is sick where I live right now...children and adults. Seems once someone gets something, its staying with them for a long time. Most importantly KEEP YOUR CHILD HOME if he is sick...he needs to recoup and the others don't need to get sick. Good luck!

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A.P.

answers from New York on

I don't have any answers for you--looks like you're doing everything right. My son just started preschool this year and so this is his first experience with a group setting (other than music classes and playdates). Just wanted to let you know you're not alone--we have been sick over here since Thanksgiving--me and the two kids take turns (although, for some reason, I seem to get hit the hardest lately!) I feel rundown, and have not been able to exercise more than three times in a month due to all the sickness. I think part of it is that it's just a really rough winter--can't wait til spring! Hang in there...

Updated

I don't have any answers for you--looks like you're doing everything right. My son just started preschool this year and so this is his first experience with a group setting (other than music classes and playdates). Just wanted to let you know you're not alone--we have been sick over here since Thanksgiving--me and the two kids take turns (although, for some reason, I seem to get hit the hardest lately!) I feel rundown, and have not been able to exercise more than three times in a month due to all the sickness. I think part of it is that it's just a really rough winter--can't wait til spring! Hang in there...

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L.R.

answers from Kansas City on

When my daughter started preschool/daycare 5 times a week, she was sick all the time too. I ended up taking her to the allergist (she had other issues other than being sick all the time) and he ran a series of blood tests on her. Turned out, she had NO immune system (even after having all her required shots). Once she received another round of shots to boost her immune system, she has only been sick a handful of times. This all started when she was 2 1/2 and she is now 5.

Good luck to you.

Updated

When my daughter started preschool/daycare 5 times a week, she was sick all the time too. I ended up taking her to the allergist (she had other issues other than being sick all the time) and he ran a series of blood tests on her. Turned out, she had NO immune system (even after having all her required shots). Once she received another round of shots to boost her immune system, she has only been sick a handful of times. This all started when she was 2 1/2 and she is now 5.

Good luck to you.

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E.C.

answers from New York on

Cut the daycare - if he has been sick all the time, you must have been home with him. That daycare must not clean well either. So, I'd definitely get another daycare - but preferably just have him home. For 'socialization' there are great children's play areas in NYC. Join one - like the Brooklyn Children's Museum - it is a fantastic play area with lots of kids and active parents.

P.M.

answers from Tampa on

Children are walking germs... they spread it to each other in densely populated child care settings as a normal course.

My daughter never got an ear infection until her first experience with a daycare around 3.5 years old. She was still nursing at that time, which I think stalled so many possible health concerns. Her class would be sick, she'd be ok. She's 5 now and has only had 2 real colds and 3 ear infections.

I'm sorry your son is going thru this, but from what I've seen and heard - it's very common to have a child in daycare constantly sick. Don't immediately go to surgery. The tonsils and adenoids are actually the first line defense for germs. They are part of the immune system and get rid of those... you get rid of some of the first responders!

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G.S.

answers from New York on

Hi S., when my son started school last year at 3 years, he would bring colds home and the flu etc. My daughter, then 1 suffered the most. She got ear infections about 3 times, the flu, and so on until sometime in the spring when everyone did things outdoors. This year my son is 4 and daughter 2. Again when my son started school, he got sick fewer times whereas my daughter who's home with me got scarlet fever twice, and was on medication for 10 days at a time. To this day, my daughter has a runny nose, coughing due to flem etc. This is non stop. She has lost weight because of the constant colds and flus, but the doctor says all this is normal. My son on the other hand, who is the one that goes to school doesn't get as sick. He just brings it home. I wouldn't worry about it. Once spring comes along things will change for the better. We need to be outdoors. When someone is indoors, germs are floating around and are airbourne. We get sick easier.
Oh, one more thing. Does Josh tend to put his hands in his mouth, nose ears, or eyes? I also noticed my daughter was doing that. That could explain why she got sick so often. I don't want to become neurotic when it comes to cleanliness, but I've started washing her hands more often than I normally do to avoid more sicknesses.

I hope things get better, and don't worry what others tell you.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Kids get sick from other kids but what you are describing doesn't seem normal Go to the ENT and see if they see a problem.

I know the kids in my center got sick all together but they were not sick as often as your little guy. What does the Director say, are all the kids this sick? Is it only your son who gets everything? If he is the only one getting this sick I would be very concerned about his immune system.

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

My first 2 kids did that their first couple of years they were in daycare. My 3rd just started daycare at 20 months old, he is almost 2. He has been going to the chiropractor for ear infections since he was 16 months old. (He has a natural drainage problem, and was nursed for 17 months.) He has not been sick since starting daycare, knock on wood. Got to be something to that, I would say. Now, I know not everyone can make it to a chiropractor every couple weeks, but in my experience my other two kids have not been really sick after the first couple of years of daycare sickness. They have not had any major illnesses to keep them out of school. They have had either perfect attendance, or near perfect. In fact, last year their only absences were misses for family reasons, like once in a lifetime trip experiences, not illnesses.
It will get better, I promise!

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