Toddler Sleep Issue

Updated on February 14, 2011
J.R. asks from Washington, DC
8 answers

Dear Mommas,My precious 2 yr 4 mo old son sleeps through the nite now for almost a year. Yay! and without CIO. Here's the challenge...he does not fall asleep easily before 9pm and sometimes later. I love him, but I am frustrated as I feel I do not have my evenings to relax and unwind.
Here is his schedule:
8am wake
bfast, play, park or playgroup, lunch at cafe
115-330 nap 315-6 play, errands
6-dinner, play with dad
7 - bath
745- read books
815 -- lites out

any suggestions?
Thanks, Jilly
730 bath

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So What Happened?

Just to clarify. Lites out at 815, but her only falls alseep 9-10...

More Answers

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

i agree with the other ladies 12-13 hours of total sleep is about right. if he is getting 11 hours at night and then a good nap, he's right where he is supposed to be. my son goes to bed at 8 pm every night, BUT we are up by 6 during the week, 7 at the latest on the weekends. (he's four now but we have had this schedule since two or so) if you would like him to go down earlier, you'll have to start getting him up earlier. good luck!

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K.F.

answers from Pensacola on

Yes, looking at total sleep time is the key. Eleven to 13 hours, depending on the child, at that age. My daughter started fazing out her daily naps at that age, much to my chagrin. She is now three and half and naps less than once a week. She sleeps from 9 to 8. Do I wish she would nap? Of course! But she is usually quiet and sedate for a couple of hours in the afternoon and I have enough freedom to get things done.
You'll probably just have to face facts that you get a little less time to yourself. Bummer ... believe me, I know. But kids become more independent and you can get more done.

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B.S.

answers from Miami on

My cousin's toddler had issues with staying up super late until they cut out his afternoon nap. But he would sleep from 2-5, then go down at 8 and keep them up till 10 with his antics. I don't think you need to cut out your son's nap, but moving his bedtime earlier would probably help him fall asleep earlier. I have a 2 year 9 month old and she does not nap at all, though she has a quiet time for an hour every afternoon (by herself in her room). We try to get her down between 7:30 and 8, depending on how the day goes with my husband's work schedule and the baby's schedule (we have a 3.5 month old too). Some days we even try for 7 if she is really losing it. She probably needs to nap, but just won't.

I would try just moving it back 30 minutes. And limit daddy's play time to quiet play. My husband loves to play crazy with my daughter, but it drives me nuts because then she is crazy wound up. And it takes her longer to fall asleep on those nights. Incidentally, in the rare instance that she does nap, she will lie in bed for 1 or 2 hours. So...it really does seem to be an overall amount of sleep. My daughter gets about 11-13 hours at night. She also sleeps in until 8/8:30 most days, so I do feel lucky even without the naps. Granted, I'm still up with the baby!

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P.M.

answers from Honolulu on

Push your time frame back one to two hours. Having playtime after 6 sounds a little late to me. I can totally understand wanting to push it to the latest if your husband gets home after five, but it looks like you are going to have to choose between an earlier bedtime or an earlier wake up. 12 hours is exactly the amount of sleep your little man needs. Good luck momma!

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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Your schedule looks great - same as ours at that age. DS went through a phase at about that age where he often didn't fall asleep right at bedtime. We could hear him having long discussions with his stuffed animals about various things. As long as he seemed happy, we just left him alone. When he got tired, he fell asleep. After a few months, he started sleeping most nights within 15 minutes or so of lights out. I wouldn't move things back at all - I don't see when DH would see DS if you did.

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R.S.

answers from Dallas on

I think what you might be overlooking is that you have a lot more time to yourself in the morning than a lot of moms! I've always read that the average wake up time at this age is somewhere between 6-8am so he's on the late end of that. I'm so jealous! I'd happily put my son to bed at 9pm if he'd sleep till 8! and if you're doing lights out at 8:15 then you really have after that to relax, right? What is your schedule (as in, what time do you go to bed and wake up?)?

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S.L.

answers from Tampa on

Hi Jilly! I'm not sure how willing or able you are to adjust your daytime schedule, but I think it's possible that you may have to consider an earlier nap time in order for your little one to have an earlier night-night time. My 20-month-old wakes up at about 7:30 and has his daily nap from about 12-2. He usually goes to sleep for the night at about 8:30, but I find that if he takes his nap any later, he does not go to sleep at night until later. He obviously needs that solid 6+ hours in between his day nap and night-night. So maybe that would make a difference for your little guy, too.

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M.F.

answers from Jacksonville on

I would try cutting down nap time by a hour and see if that helps. We have a similar situation with son, but he's 4! He's in bed with lights out usually right around 8 pm. It takes him a good hour to fall asleep as well. He'll come out to the living room at least one or he'll stay in his room and look at books by himself. Good luck!

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