Toddler Weaning

If your down to 3 times a day and he is doing well he very well may self wean in the next few months. My daughters both did shortly after the nursing became not so much food as comfort. I would first cut the am feeding then when he is ok with that then the nap time feeding. Give him a sippy cup with milk or water instead and cut out the bed time nursing last. If he is sick , hurt or upset and nursing for comfort try just snuggling with a favorite blanket, animal or whatever. A.

Hi Beata,
Congratulations on your year plus breastfeeding relationship, wonderful!
My suggestion for bedtime is to start some routine that doesn't include breastfeeding - a short rocking, a story, a song, saying goodnight to the stuffed animals, etc. Do the nursing in one place, and if you have a husband or partner, have that person do the other part of the routine elsewhere. This way, when you feel you and your little guy are ready to stop the evening nursing, the rest of the routine (the part that comes after the nursing and right before bed) stays the same as your son has come to expect it. Start to soothe him in other ways if he's sick, teething, etc - or allow his dad to do that comforting for a while, so that he becomes used to something else, and then when you haven't nursed in a while, you can comfort him in those ways too.
Good luck!

Hi! Congratulations on nursing for as long as you have - its a wonderful thing :) My daughter is 18 mos and I just weaned her (completely) about two months ago... I was so nervous about the whole weaning process, but for me it was so much easier than I expected! I just took it soo slow and didn't rush the process... Like you, I got her down to naps, am, and bedtime after her 1st birthday... I thought I would get rid of naps first, but those were a bit harder than the mornings so I think mornings ended up going first.. Exactly what you said - I got my butt out of bed and just started her day.. Some days I still fed her if she seemed to need it, or some days I would pop in a video so I could relax a few more minutes.. that seemed to work well and she didn't really ask for milk in the am... Naps were a bit more difficult - I sometimes tried to put her down without - then she cried and I would pick her up and nurse her.. Sometimes I tried to time errands w/ her being out in the car and falling asleep there... I gradually lessened the amount of time I nursed her.. sometimes I just stood w/ her and rocked her instead of sitting in the glider.. It seemed to be a "two step forward and one step back" process and I was ok with that... Then I nursed at night only for a while (month or two) .. and I was ok w/ either keeping going or weaning.. I would have my hubby put her to bed some nights so she knew she could go without milk.. I would try to lessen the time every so often - and if she was ok w/ that she would suck her fingers, if not she would cry and want more and I would give her some more.. I had something come up where I couldn't nurse for two nights in a row, so I had my husband put her to bed those two nights and then two or three more nights.. Then I put her to bed without nursing one night, and then the next night she wanted it so I gave her some.. She nursed for about a minute and then stopped... That was it...
So I hope my story helps.. I think its just important to do what you feel is right.. Don't rush it, and just take your time.. And don't worry if you have to go backwards for a few days if he seems like he needs it.. just try again..
Best of Luck to you!

Why 18 months? Was that the timeline you put on your nursing relationship?

At first my goal was to go to 6 weeks. When I got to 6 weeks it changed to 3 months. Then 6 months. Then one year. Two years. Three years. Then I said I'd never nurse past 4. LOL

As it turns out, I am nursing #3 now and have not gone past the 38 month mark. I have gone with the individual child, when they were ready to let go, instead of a timeline. When you wean when they are ready, it's really quite easy. And doing it around the age of 3, they understand when you say they are getting older and that is for babies. Mine did, anyway. Weaning was not traumatic or worrisome and I have some really awesome memories. I chose to continue nursing for quite a while past what is considered "normal" in this culture, but it really benefited the children and in turn caused me no stress. And once they get to around 18 - 24 months they really didn't nurse in public anymore so it was a non issue for anyone else to even know we were still nursing, besides their dad of course.

That's WONDERFUL that you were able to nurse that long!! God bless you!! I heard that if you eat parsley, it will help wean your breastmilk and if you cut one time down, it will decrease your milk supply and then you can cut down the next time, first bed time and then morning. Or bedtime, then afternoon, cut that down and the last you have to cut down would be morning. You will gradually do that and that way you won't have to worry about having some soreness and need to be nursed a little to get out some milk. Also, it will be a gradual change and he won't even realize it's happen. Stopping brumptly may not be a good thing for you nor him. Gradually do and distract him during that time with sippy cups and foods and self feeding and so forth. I have experienced alot of different things when it came down to self feeding. I couldn't get my third to do it and then let him try a piece of cookie which made him want more and had to feed himself and that was great after that. He doesn't like certain touches and had to teach him and still am. Like he doesn't like sitting on grass and doesn't like the feel of the grass especially with his hands but I have to get him used to that and it takes work but it teaches me new things that they are different like we adults are different. It also help me not to expect him do somehing ealy or later because the different timing for the others. It's really cool to be open and learn their styles, their personalities and likes and dislikes. Great job, Mom!!

I nursed both mine right up until a little before 2 yrs when they pretty much self-weaned too. The last feeding of the day was the last one to go, but I was able to do it by just rocking after we finished books and then laying the kids down (I was very surprised it worked!). I did have to tell my daughter that there was no more "mak" (what she called it, along with a sign of me patting my chest that we had made up), but I don't remember her having any tears or anything about it. Good luck!

Oh, and the only reason I stopped at 2 yrs was because with my daughter I was trying to get pregnant again (which I almost immediately did again after not being able to for about 4-5 mos while bf-ing); my son ended up just stopping on his own.

I was in a similar situation with my daughter. She was 22 months when we stopped. I never thought I would nurse that long but it was such a great way to soothe her and I did let her fall asleep on me that way. I got pregnant with my second and my ob told me I had to stop. I wasn't sure if I really did or not and kept the night feedings but I was so tired, I realized I needed to for my sake. I switched to having her use her sippy cup of milk before bed. (she doesn;t sleep with it) We would read a story and she'd have her cup (she was already good at using her sippy so it wasn't a stretch for her to switch to it) I really thought it would be a lot harder than it was because she loved that time so much. Once I told her we were done that was that. I didn't go back. It was about a week or so that she asked for it but she didn't really fuss a lot and there was no crying fits (i was afraid of that b/c we had such a hard time getting her in her own bed) I think she knew I meant it when I said it was done and she was eating well enough on her own that she could handle the change.
Once in a while when things are a bit crazy and she's had a rough day she still asks and its hard when she does because I do miss that closeness, but I just tell her there's no more milk there and she is ok after a minute or two and we her something else to drink.

I just said "No". That was it. A few evenings of misery but it was considerably easier than I thought it would be. My daughter was a bit older than your boy.

my first and my last self weaned, but my middle child was still nursing full speed ahead and i got pregnant with #3 and my doc told me to stop. the morning was the easiest, i just distracted her with other foods etc. but like you said, the going to sleep was the hardest, it took a while, and in the end i just had to stop. i had hubby put her to sleep for the first few days, i had to leave the room, which he did by bopping her in the boppy seat and then we would transfer her to the crib.. not ideal, but it worked well,,, of course we bopped her in that thing for over a year, until she was so big it didnt even bop any more! just layed there on the floor lol. she went to a toddler bed after that, once the baby was in the crib, and slept fine there... this is probably not the advice you want to hear, but its what we did. i couldnt imagine how else to do it without letting her cry, which i didnt want to do at the time. good luck.