Too Paranoid?

You've definitely gone beyond protective, into paranoid.
Hard as it may be, you've got to push it down, and LET HER GO.

Im not going to lie, I dont like it all that much but I let them go. I'm not going to hinder my kids lives and experiences because of my fears. I have a lot of them so they would live some boring lives if I did. I sign the waiver. I let them go and I ask all about it when I pick them up. Thats how I get over it

I'd feel far more worried about my kids being in a regular vehicle.

School bus and other CDL drivers that drive children are among the safest and best trained drivers on the road. They are required to complete mulitiple safety classes every single year (when was the last driver's safety class you took?). And if a bus is hit, it is far better equipped to take that impact than your car. My mom has been a school bus driver for many years and she takes more care driving "her" kids than any parent I've ever met. I trust her and the other bus drivers without reservation.

My husband drive school buses part time (he's retired and needed something to keep him busy). Believe me when I tell you that the training involved in getting a CDL with a school bus endorsement is hard. It's not only driving but checking out safety points on the bus before even starting the engine.Plus a written test and a driving test which involves parallel parking a full sized school bus. I don't know about you but I have a hard time parallel parking my car. lol

In addition there are monthly safety training sessions that must be attended and the drivers require physicials to insure they are healthy enough to drive and get the kids off the bus in an emergency situation. There's a lot to insure that the kids are transported safely.

What exactly are you afraid of? Car accidents are far more common than bus accidents.

Buses are typically far safer than private vehicles. Chances are, the parents who are volunteering for the field trip are usually MORE attentive during field trips because they have other people's kids to care for as well.

For the most part, I am more relaxed about my son taking a school bus than I am when his class is taking a field trip via public transportation; that said, since he is young, on field trip days I still pack a card in his pocket with all of our contact info on it. He knows our address and phone number, but if he was separated from the adults and needing some help, he might be upset and have a hard time remembering it. This is just extra insurance. :)

I don't understand the overly concern here. How old is your LO? Is this the first time he/she will be bussed? First camp? There is a first for everything and you can't be there 24/7 to oversee your LO. At some point we have to let go with baby steps to allow our children to make choices, become independent and responsible adults.

You say you recall fun field trips in school and why would you not allow your child to make memories as well. I feel for the children who are deprived of learning experiences due to parental fears.

As a substitute teacher, I do see some parents (VERY FEW) who refuse to allow their children to go on field trips and it is very sad to see those students feeling ridiculed by others who do get to go and they stay in school in another classroom. Most of the time, the principal and guidance counselor are working with the parent to try to help them come to terms with the fear because in the end, it is the child who gets hurt by this.

School buses are safe. Are there accidents? Yes, there are accidents and that accident could very well happen with you behind the wheel carting your LO around instead of a bus driver.

I encourage volunteering for the programs and field trips but not simply so you can monitor your child. In a field trip scenario, I want the volunteer to equally be caring for ALL of the children in his/her group.. not just the volunteer's child.

if you can't lighten up and learn to let go in baby steps, maybe you need to talk to a counselor who can help you get through this tension. Believe me, there will be a LOT more tension as your child grows up and in a few years, you'll compare the tension to this situation and realize how you were worrying so over a nonevent.

I personally have no problem with the bus. I actually perfer it to my LO doing field trips in someone's private car. It is more likely for a private car to get into an accident than a school bus.

When my son, neices and nephews were in summer camp, they went on plenty of field trips over the summer during their summer camp experiences. Not 1 accident and we are talking 6 children in 3 different camps over a period of 6 years. That's alot of trips.

Your paraonia is just that. You get over it by facing your fears and sticking her on the bus and not worrying.

Many kids ride the bus to school every single day. The bus is perfectly safe, just as safe if not safer then your car. Relax and let your kid have fun with his friends and his school. I always feel so sorry for the kids that has to stay behind and hang out in the office while his whole class gets to go have fun, and then they come back buzzing with excitement about what they did or saw and once again that poor kid feels left out :(

I would have an issue with private cars with parents I don't know, but bus drivers get lots of training.

I feel bad calling you paranoid, but I'm not sure I understand where this fear is coming from.

It takes a LOT more training to be a bus driver, especially a school bus driver, than to get a regular driver's license. And buses are big, and sturdy. On the unlikely chance that a car hits a bus, the likelihood is that the car will be damaged, not the bus.

And, these buses have monitors -- teachers, etc. -- inside the bus. They keep a watchful eye on what all the kids are doing.

The thing is, at some point, in the future, your kids are going to go off to college, or the military or the workforce, or whatever they're going to do. And if they have no experience being out there in the world, without you there, then they won't have the capacity to make wise, responsible judgments. They'll be used to you doing the thinking for them. And that's really dangerous. It's like throwing someone in a river when they've never had a swimming lesson.

I'm not sure what else to say, since I'm not sure where your fear is coming from. But buses, on the highway, are safe.

It's normal to have thoughts that you hope they're going to be ok, but then take a step back and realize you're over-thinking this. You always try to weigh out risk and restriction.
You just have to have a little faith. It's not always easy, but its just what you have to do. My daughter is 16 and sprained her ankle pretty badly on a short mission trip. She was not even 2 hours away and I felt terrible. She was fine (think she loved the extra attention). My point is, try not to let your fears affect your child getting out into the world.

What is it about busses that concerns you? Highway driving is far safer than in town driving. Busses are a really very safe. But if there is something specific that scares you, you should mention it. There is very likely someone who could give you more information to ease your mind.

Personally, I never really thought about it. I don't mean to sound naive or like I just don't care enough about my kids to look into things. I just kind of figured if thousands kids ride the bus to and from school every day with practically zero accidents and even when there are accidents the very rare injuries are minor, then there's very little for me to worry about.

Pushed to its logical end, the trend over the past 2 generations toward protecting our kids from any and all possible harm would result in babies packaged in cotton batting at birth and never allowed out of a small, empty room with no doors or windows (glass might break!). There is no question in our minds how destructive that would be. Trading safety for actual quality of life – taking away essential possibilities that make us fully human. But society is trending in that direction, and has been for decades now.

I raised my daughter in different times, when kids were more 'free-range." It was understood that kids would try things, learn what they were capable of, and possibly break a bone or burn themselves finding out what they weren't yet capable of. Fantastic and essential knowledge. Parents were usually nearby, but there was less overt worry about children's safety, and kids thrived on it. Really.

That kind of freedom to explore has gradually been drained from most kids' experience over the past couple of generations, and families today don't even know how radically family life has changed. It's a genuine loss, and it affects our children's complete outlook on what life is about. And because kids aren't allowed to get little hurts, little sufferings, they have less chance to develop empathy for those who do suffer.

Yes, that relative freedom included a certain amount of risk. But developmental science is beginning to look with alarm at the effects of overly cautious parenting, which is restricting the opportunities for kids to learn how to survive and thrive in their own bodies.

The paranoia that I see in younger parents seems to have two main causes:

1. Television news. If it bleeds, it leads. Repeatedly, newscast after newscast. This leads us to believe the world is a far more dangerous place than it actually is. And there's seldom a mention of the bazillions of wonderful things people learn and do for each other every day.

2. Many more ways for experts to shame or alarm parents, and many more ways for parents to shame each other when something actually does go wrong. And the media go for the gut, because people like to "feel," even if that's anger or fear or judgement. Again, we learn that the world is far more dangerous than real life actually is.

If you can find a way to lighten up on this particular anxiety, you will probably be doing your daughter a real service, not only allowing her to have these summer experiences, but also showing her how grownups deal with anxieties in healthy ways.

Children have been riding buses forever. It is part of growing up. It's fun. Do not deny her that experience. It's a learning experience too. I never thought twice about it. However, today's parents are extremely over protective almost to a fault. Let you kid be a kid and enjoy her childhood.

Private vehicle I would not allow however my son's camps (preschool and town run daycamp) always use buses. I had a hard time the first summer he was in the town run daycamp and went on a couple of different field trips to an amusement park and other venues. I spoke wtih the staff, even though they where young they where very good at keeping track of the kids.

Breathe...momma...breathe....

Depending upon the length of the field trip - they might have charter buses! School bus drivers have to undergo a LOT of training...and buses are typically safer than cars....

BREATH!!! you're being WWWWAAAYYY too paranoid...unless your daughter is 3 and in pre-school...then I would ask about car seats, etc. if she's in Kindergarten? BREATHE!!!

School and activity buses are like tanks- one big hunk of steel going down the highway. Much safer than a car. The real danger surrounding school buses is after the child gets off and a driver doesn't stop when the bus is stopped. This doesn't sound like your scenario, so try to relinquish control a little bit. It will be fine and she will have a blast!

OMG!!!! Thank you for posting this! I could have written this post myself! I feel the EXACT same way you do about buses!!! How the hell is it 2014 and no seatbelts on buses??? (I assume that is your concern, right)?

A couple months ago, my first grader had a field trip to the Ft. Worth Zoo. 45 minutes on a highway going around 70 mph with NO SEATBELTS!!!! WOW!!!! I did NOT allow it! I drove him there myself and stayed with his group all day, and then drove him home. I decided that I might allow my kids to ride a bus for local field trips, but definitely not for field trips that require a highway.

And I thought I was the only crazy mom who felt this way! Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone!!

Being a parent is not for the faint of heart. We have to suck it up even though we are worried. SO many times, I was nervous or worried, but every time our daughter did great in new situations.

Your daughter will grow as much as you will allow. I know it is so hard. We want our children with us at all times, but that us just not realistic or emotionally healthy.

She needs to learn that she can go on a field trip without her mother.

She needs to learn she can ride a bus without her mother, she can ride in other peoples cars without her mom, she can be at school a whole day without her parents.

I swear, many times it is harder on us than our children.

I recall a dad at our elementary school, who wanted all field trips to be dropped, because he did not want his child leaving the campus.

So instead we other parents proposed that we wanted the field trips to continue and we would be happy to pay for a substitute teacher to be hired to stay with the children who's parents did not want them to go on field trips.. Surprise, surprise. He was the only one. So the principle told him his daughter could stay with her in her office all day.

He dropped his suggestions, with the urging of his wife.

People who are saying that buses are safer are not informed. Once a month, on average in this country there is a bus wreck and children are killed and/or injured. Sure your child can have this happen even if you are driving them, but in your own car they are buckled up.
Unfortunately I know about this because of personal experience. In 2006 my daughter was severely injured in a bus wreck while going on a school sponsored trip to a soccer game. Two of her team mates were killed. None of us will ever be the same and have worked to have seat belts installed in all vehicles carrying children in the state of TX and nationally. This is a link to our website. http://www.safebuses4kids.org/