Too Sick for Preschool, Can She Come to Daycare Instead??

Updated on December 05, 2011
M.S. asks from Lincolnshire, IL
23 answers

One of the children I watch attends preschool half day and then comes to my house. The mom called this morning and told me her child had an aweful cough and felt he was not enough to attend preschool. Was I able to take him the whole day? Another child I am watching is about to become a big sister any day now and my own chiild has a show she is performing in later this week. I told her that if she thought he was to sick to preschool, I did not think he should be here with the daycare kids, especially since one of my families was about to have a baby! I am kind of feeling bad about it, do you think I did the right thing by telling mom she could not send her child here today??

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K.P.

answers from Dallas on

You absolutely did the right thing. If the child is to sick for preschool he is to sick for daycare.

4 moms found this helpful
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D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

YES. And if I were the mom who was expecting, I would give you a big Thank You. I am a working mom, so I know it's frustrating to have to stay home when kids are sick. But it's part of being a mom.

3 moms found this helpful

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X.O.

answers from Chicago on

No, I think you are right to tell her that if he is too sick for school (which is I assume, to not get other kids at school sick), he is also too sick to come to daycare. You are especially right when considering that another of your kids will have a newborn in the home within days.

Do you have a written policy about sick kids? If not, I'd iron one out and let the parents know the official policy.

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L.M.

answers from Dover on

If he was the only child in your care, and you were ok w/ giving him the extra attention a sick child requires, it would be fine to allow him to come. Too sick for school, too sick for daycare...it's all the same. The only difference is whether he had symptoms that truly excluded him from school/daycare or just didn't feel well.

Sounds like he COULD have went to school or daycare but was feeling crappy enough to stay home.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

If the mother felt he was not well enough for preschool, then she answered the question for you, really.
Sometimes as a working parent you want the "out" of saying - I called child care and they won't let him come, so I need this time with him today.
I wouldn't feel bad, you did what you needed to keep the larger population healthy.
If it is still nagging you, go ahead and talk to the mom about it and share with her your thought process just so she fully understands you are not trying to be a meanie:)

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J.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Yes! You did the right thing. Mom needs to understand that if her child is seriously ill, he needs to be at home resting not forced to carry on business as usual. Not only will this prolong his illness, but it endangers others. It is a hardship for her of course, because she'll need to make arrangements for work, but this is the tough part of parenting. Sometimes we have to put our kids before our jobs. Sounds like this is one of those times for that mom.

She should not force others into a potentially horrible situation that will cause problems for many well into the next month. It's pretty selfish in the big scheme of things. The flu (which is what it sounds like you're dealing with here) has symptoms that last 10 days for the average person and is highly contagious. If her kid bring germs to your home, you, your children, the other children who attend and their families, and anyone else you all come in contact with can potentially get this illness, including grandparents and pregnant moms (with holidays coming). This won't be a few days thing. You will alll be dealing with it for the next 3 weeks or more.

Merry Christmas to you too lady! Yeah, you did the right thing. No we can't prevent illness from happening. Mostly because germs are everywhere. But we're downright nuts when we have an opportunity to prevent it and plough on anyway without thought of how this will affect others.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Sacramento on

It depends on what your policies are. If you run a "sick" daycare where kids can come to your house with certain types of illnesses and just pretty much lay around at your house, but not have much exposure to other kids, that's one thing... some people do that. Daycare can be a different level of activity than the expectation of preschool.

In my daycare that would not be the case. Kids have to come to care well enough to play. If he's too sick for preschool he'd almost certainly be too sick to come to daycare. And since preschoolers are not always in good practice of cover their mouths when they cough, there's the additional issue of exposing other kids.

Don't feel bad. You're protecting the other kids in your care, and he probably would feel better being home with mom anyway. Nice of her to call you and ask, rather than just bring him over :)

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S.O.

answers from Chicago on

Yes you did the right thing! Don't ever feel bad about putting all the children's well-being first. I did family daycare for over 20 years and as long as you are putting all the children's well-being first then you have nothing to feel bad about.

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S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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J.S.

answers from Chicago on

You did the right thing. If her child is too sick for school, he's too sick for daycare.

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N.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I do home childcare as well (over 14 years) and I would have said the same thing. My policies are pretty inline with church preschools, center based care and elementary schools for that exact reason.

If she felt he was too ill to go there, then he would be too ill to attend my home childcare. As someone else stated, the option to just "sit around, color and watch a movie" does not exist here! We have a set routine all day long and children need to come prepared to engage in such activities (circle time, outside play, games and lessons...just like preschool here). Lately I am fortunate enough to have a helper here (due to my injury and limited abilities) but would not strain that assistance by having ill feeling children here. And Just because a child is feeling under the weather, does not mean I should set up special activities and attempt to seperate and cater to that one child who is ill, when I still have at least 5 others who need my care and attention. Its not fair to the rest of them, and their families if everyone is exposed to whatever your child may have.

If that Mommys instincts says keep him out of activities due to the cough, then he should be at home watching a movie and coloring with her. You did right.

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E.T.

answers from Albuquerque on

Yes! You absolutely totally did the right thing. You're not running a hospital, you're running a daycare. If a child isn't well enough to go to school, they're not well enough to go to daycare.

I have kids in preschool who also go to a home daycare when there's a day off. There is no way I'd expect the daycare provider to take my kids if they couldn't go to school due to illness.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Yes you are right - you're running a daycare, not an infirmary! I'm a working mom and sometimes we just lose our common sense when faced with a full day at work and a child who is under the weather. Hopefully she can see that this makes sense.

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J.K.

answers from Dallas on

If he's too sick to be around one group of kids, he's too sick to be around ALL groups of kids. It's not like the germs affect preschool kids yet NOT daycare kids. I agree with your decision.

1 mom found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Eh, no. I think the kid could have come. A cough can make it so a kid doesn't have energy to go to school and be active, but at daycare they CAN sit and color or watch a movie.

My sitter is great about taking kids as long as they aren't conrtagious. It saves me a lot of time off of work...because just since schools can't take them doesn't mean day care can't. It's different regulations.

Just my two cents though. A cough, if not contagious, should be allowed to be at daycare.

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K.F.

answers from Cleveland on

You did the right thing!

1 mom found this helpful
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K.J.

answers from New York on

You did the right thing, because child are great incubators for all sorts of illnesses, especially, if the mother failed to get all of his immunizations on time, like influenza! Because, my job, required my attendance everyday, without taking personal leave, i had to find two backup Illness daycares," in case she got sick. most parents do not consider that they need a "sick daycare place," too! This is a new business idea, and most hospitals have sick daycares. As a rule, the parents should not return their children, until a PHYSICIAN clears them with a written note after a medical examination. I would investigate the names of local, respectable "sick daycares," for your parents who have to work, provide it as a list, with your disclaimer of no liability for their use, just a suggestion list. Remember, Meningitis, starts out small, but, has a big underlying bang!

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B.S.

answers from Lansing on

You definitely did the right thing.

I personally am not to scared of a cold, but if its bad enough they can't attend school...they shouldn't be at daycare either.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

The send home rules in child care are fever over 101 degrees (some state regulations do say 100 degrees), diarrhea, or vomiting in the past 24 hours. Other things are symptoms that are not send home issues.

He sounds like he was well enough to go to school with some cough syrup or lozenges. But if she did not send him there I would have told her no too, she may have been hiding a fever with Tylenol or Motrin.

D.S.

answers from Columbus on

Absolutely!!! Even if you’re not a “formal” preschool, the same rules should apply for sick children, because you are taking care of children.
If my kids are sick, I don’t even take them to parties or a play area, because there are other kids who could have compromised immune systems and get really sick.
Don’t feel bad, you did the right thing.

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I can't believe she even asked you this. For her to ask is totally inconsiderate to the other children, and to you. Of course you did the right thing.

L._.

answers from San Diego on

I understand. I've had the same thing happen with preschoolers. I don't know why in home providers are treated like relatives. We are not relatives when it comes to them putting us first in their lives.

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A.C.

answers from Columbus on

You did the right thing.

If you don't already have a policy on sickness, write one up and send it out in the New Year, or just in the next week or so, and say something like "Tis the season of colds! Please read over Great Family Daycare's sickness policy, so you'll know when you can send Johnny to daycare, and when he should stay home and not make the other kids (and me!) sick! Thanks, and happy--and healthy--holidays to you!" You might also include basic tips on staying healthy (like hand washing!!!).

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