Torn :/ - El Monte,CA

You would use the money for a boob job! Really...that would be absolute last thing I would waste a dollar on! When you have a house paid for, cars paid for, fully funded college plans and retirement plan...then get a boob job. Hello!!!

I'll give you the advice I wish I'd received when I was in a similar situation. Take a Dave Ramsey Financial Peace class and learn how to manage your money!!! Don't spend a penny until you do that and give yourselves time to process this windfall. I didn't and still regret it! Wishing you the best...

Not enough information here. You don't mention the size of the gift, for one. And there is a big difference in someone gifting you with $5,000 and someone gifting you with $50,000. Particularly in regards to buying a house.

You also didn't mention your current income or financial position, except to say that your husband's credit is evidently poor enough to warrant him sneaking around behind you to pay to "fix his credit". And that he owes $200.

Those are both flags to me that you are not in a position to be buying a house. Yes, the market is the best time you will probably ever find to buy a home. Yes, the rates are probably about the lowest we will ever see. But that still does not mean you should buy. There are other factors.
Can you AFFORD to maintain a home?
If you are having to choose between a car and a home with the money, it obviously is not a large enough sum to buy a home outright... so that means you would be making a mortgage payment. And like everyone else's home, yours will require maintenance to keep it up and in good repair. Not everyone budgets for this, but everyone pays for it, one way or another.

What are you renting right now? How long have you been paying that amount for rent? How long have you been at your current jobs? Do you expect to stay at them for a long time? Do you anticipate moving any time in the near future (less than 3 years or so?) What other expenses do you have?
If $200 debt your husband has is a big big deal and stressing you out, then I would suggest you are not in a position to take out a mortgage for multiple thousands of dollars. If the issue is not the money, but the fact he hid it from you, that TOO is a reason to be leery of following his financial advice, without first going to some counseling.

Ya'll act like you wouldn't have a wish list if ya'll had extra money laying around. Who here hasn't answered a question or two like "if you had an extra $100 what would you spend it on" or "what would you do if someone gave you a million dollars".

Good grief ya'll, lighten the freak up!

Party: a good realtor will explain the financial and credit benefits AND risks of buying a home, as well as give you a bird's eye view of mortgage payments for the next 30 years. That should be a good enough reality check for your husband.

i think the communication issue looms larger than the financial one (and am slightly appalled at the one response that suggests you should have hidden the inheritance from you husband!)
i really can't give $ advice because you don't give specifics, which is fine. i gather you're asking about how to work it out, right?
$500 is a pretty small credit issue, so there must be way more to the story. if you've got awful credit, rebuilding it is very important, but yes, your husband should certainly be telling you how he's planning to do it.
if the gift will only cover the purchase of a used car, it's probably not enough for a down payment on a house. however, if you have enough to put down on a good house, that's a far better investment than a car.
it sounds as if you're in an adversarial position to each other over this, and neither of you is hearing the other. it's a perfect scenario for some counseling, which will help your big picture as well as this immediate question.
khairete
S.

I'm definitely don't agree with the poster below that your husband is naive. I think he is trying to smartly make an investment. Buying a house is an investment and a very good one. Buying a car and breast augmentation are most certainly NOT. Savings for kids should be a last priority behind saving for your retirement and based on your post you guys probably aren't there yet. My advice is to put the inheritance in a six month or 1 year CD that way you're earning interest on it while you do some research. I agee with others that gaining some money management skills would be very beneficial. Work on improving your credit. Make a budget and stick to it. Make sure that saving for retirement is part of the plan and saving for another vehicle. Do some research on home ownership, the process for buying a home. Things like commuting times, schools, crime, etc.

Good luck!

Are you living crowded now? if you are absolutely consider buying a home. We recently bought a used car because our cars had 150k & 180k miles. We bought used with only 22k miles for under $15k. Two years ago we bought a house. For us moving into a 1700 sq foot home after living in 900sq foot apartment for 15 years felt like we moved into a palace. Yes there are plenty of things on a wish list, but the house is one of the few things that will appreciate in value where almost everything else depreciates. Good luck.

I urge you to get financial counseling from someone who helps people figure this kind of stuff out. You need to understand how it all works. Tax benefits for interest paid for a mortgage can make part of your house payment tax deductible (lowering what you actually pay by making it so that you pay less taxes.)

But here's the kicker - paying to fix something that breaks in your house is a big difference from the landlord fixing something. I kind of always thought of the mortgage itself as the cheapest part of owning a house. It's everything else that costs so much - nickeling and diming you to death, or if you're REALLY unlucky, a lot MORE than nickeling and diming. I had to buy a new furnace (up and down) and AC's (up and down), a new roof, new garage door openers, and a water softener when I moved into my house. The ONLY one of these I expected before purchasing was the roof. E-Ouch!!

I worry that you are having arguments over a few hundred dollars. You need more cushion than a few hundred dollars.

You also need to understand that if you are in debt or have a poor credit rating, you may not even be able to GET a mortgage. OR, you may have to pay a higher interest rate. That's one reason why you two need credit counseling as part of your financial counseling.

You will also need to get a pre-approved so that you don't have nasty surprises.

Your husband is coming from a different place, Mom. You two need to come together and make sense of this. Fighting about it isn't going to help. First you figure out the money. THEN you figure out the feelings.

Best of luck,
Dawn

It actually sounds like you are naive one. You are wanting to buy a car and he is wanting to invest in the future. If ALL he owes is 500.00 - what is the big deal? I wish we had only a 500.00 debt when we started looking into buying a home. I think there are other reasons, that you are not sharing, as to why you do not want to commit to a house. Your post rambles and you give no concrete reason not to invest in your future. Buying a house does not happen overnight and you don't HAVE to spend this money right now. Get your finances in order and talk to an advisor before the TWO of you make this decision.

I was right there with you right up to the breast augmentation thing.... Lost me there, sorry.

You both need to get some classes on financial planning. Consider the Ramsey course or even Suze Orman's (not a huge fan of her but it beats what you're doing.)

Couples divorce over money more than anything else. Ask yourself: What does money mean to me? what is it for? Everybody comes up with logic about what they should do but you need to acknowledge what you are actually likely to do. The best diets fail because we are illogical, financial plans fail for the same reason.

Is money security? Freedom? status?

Get some advice before this eats your money and your marriage.

OMG - the breast augmentation was I think your way of showing you WOULDN'T be selfish and do something like that before all other things were paid for. Maybe take that out so people don't keep harping on it! Have you looked at the cost of a home vs renting? Look at mortgage, property taxes and 1-2% of the cost of the home in upkeep/maintenance. When I do our budget, I figure on savings for house maintenance of the 1-2% a year in a separate savings account. I don't literally have a separate account bc finances aren't tight for us but if they were, I would separate that money. As someone said, upkeep is huge. But if you take into account all the costs of owning a home and it's not much different than rent, then it likely is a good idea to buy. Property taxes and mortgage interest are deductible. I would pay off all other debt though first and set aside some for a safety net and a newer car. Doesn't have to be a brand new car but if yours is on its last legs, you'll need to replace it. Put this all down on paper and the answer should become more obvious. I am big on paying for kids' college but even I don't know that i'd put saving for my kids ahead of buying a house... Once that house is paid off, you have some place to live when you're retired vs not being able to cover rent forever and being a burden on your kids. If you start house shopping and see the annual cost of homeowning, it may change your husband's mind if you really can't afford it and then it's not you being a negative nelly.

If you have credit issues, your inheritance should go towards paying down debt. And... you probably already know... but all those debt fixing places do is exactly what you could have done yourself, so your DH is throwing away $500 in fees.

Think about what got you in the credit problem situation in the first place. Will being saddled with a mortgage help you never be in that situation again? (probably not). But paying down debt and taking some financial planning courses together will.

Pretend. Draw up a budget for a mortgage, taxes, double your heating bill, increase your water bill, lay aside money for maintenance on the inside and outside, allowing for things like a new fridge. Then hold back money for a car payment, braces and medical emergencies because those things happen whether or not you have a house payment. Put that money less your rent, into a dream house account. If you can stand not to touch it for a year, then you can afford it ...and you have a good amt saved. If it creates a burden then you can't. Try to get a reasonable estimate.

You H sounds like my cousin's H who is bipolar and spends mucho money when he is on an upswing and deeply regrets it when he is on a down swing. Be steady and realistic.

I would look into visiting with a financial planner...that way you can sit down with someone who really knows about money and investing.

I agree with those who said put aside enough in an emergency fund to cover six months of living...and then see if your current budget can handle a mortgage payment by paying the difference into your savings account.

We figured our mortgage payment when my husband and myself were both working...then I wanted to be a SAHM...if my husband hadn't had significant pay increases between our buying a house and me wanting to stay home...I would not have been able to stay home. So if you do look to buy maybe calculate what you can afford on your husband's income only...just in case one of you loses your job you can keep making those payments.

But do call around and find a financial planner there are very smart people who donate thier time to help others figure out their finances.

(I understand about the breast augmentation...it is on your if we had an "unlimited budget" wish list...I have one cosmetic thing on my wish list too. I don't think it will ever get done because so many things come before it...but I do have that on my wish list.) HUGS!!

Perhaps you could talk with someone to learn all the ins and outs of buying a home. In Portland we have an office that specializes in helping first time home buyers. They regularly offer workshops to teach what to consider before buying a home. The workshop goes into several areas and learning this will help both of you to make an informed decision. You can also make an appointment to talk with someone. I think the office is a government one. I can't think of the name of it now but I'll look it up and post it later.

By learning what home ownership involves including what one needs to be able to comfortably buy a home your husband may then agree with you or vice versa.

It does sound like you'd have difficulty getting a loan because of credit issues. This office would be able to tell you what sort of credit you'll need.

I googled "first time home buyer Oregon" and was given a page of web sites. I didn't find the one I was looking for but you could find someone locally who could help you make an informed decision.

Seriously? Breast augmentation? Not even in the same category as buying a house.

Buying a home is a very serious decision to make and it doesn't sound as though either of you are mature enough financially to make such a decision. For that reason ALONE, continue to rent and "tie up" that money in an account that you cannot touch for quite a while. Remember that a mortgage payment is the MINIMUM a house will cost you each month. You have to maintain, fix, renovate, mow, water, heat, cool, etc... those things add up very quickly and you can't call the landlord when something happens.

There are far bigger issues here than whether or not to purchase a home. Get on the same page financially or you will find yourself with a zero-ed out account very quickly.

a house is a pragmatic way to use money. renting is throwing away money.

i suggest you both take a class on financial planning.

I honestly love owning our home vs renting!
Yeah, it get a bit stressful when you have things break and you can't just call the landlord to fix it. But when it gets fixed it gets fixed right and the way you want it and not cheaply, the way they want it and possibly in a way that will just break again.
The only thing I wish we didn't have was an HOA. But, they are finally getting a little better and back off really quick when called on being unreasonable (I'm sorry..not going to repaint my entire exterior because you guys decided you don't like the current paint palate of the neighborhood and think it's "too dark" and "outdated". It's earth tones..sorry..I rather like the color of my house and it was one of the selling points when I bought it. Besides...I don't have money just lying here to do it anyway. Sorry...tangent rant over)
We used an inheritance from my grandmother to finally buy ourselves a decent sized townhome years ago that we later sold to buy the house we're in now. I like having a place to call my own.
If it's something you can do financially long term (remember there's property tax, repairs etc) then I would do it.

Well, if you can pay rent, most likely you can manage a house payment (that is my word of encouragement).
If I were in your situation I would approach it as a first thing's first. 1. set aside at least three months living expenses in a saving's account. 2.pay off any debt 3. go to the bank and see what kind of loan you all would qualify for and then see what your payments on a house in that range would cost per month. If more than your curren rent, put the difference into savings. If you can do that for six months and not feel pulled financially - go for it. Plus, you have the savings from the overpay of rent, plus whatever is left after doing steps 1 & 2 with your mom's inheritance.
Good luck!
(oops, i re-read and realized I had two, #2)

You should have never told him about your mama's gift to you.

In your dream world, would a breast augmentation come before house, car and savings for kids? Does your hubby know about that wish? Just found it interesting, given all the other things your entire family could use. That said, I feel for you - it's a tough situation to be in when the two of you don't agree on finances. Hope you can compromise on a decision that makes both of you happy. Could you ask your mother how she would feel about your spending her gift money on some of those things? Good luck.

Best advice I could give would be to discuss this with a financial advisor. With a lump sum of money gifted to you there would be many ideas of how to save it while you are deciding how to go with your future. Of course, I cringe at the thought of you using funds (obviously enough to consider as a down payment on a home) toward a vehicle which is a depreciating value and not an investment. Your husband may not be saying what you want to hear but you are a partnership and you should "visit" his ideas without completely shutting them down because you don't completely agree. Now do not get me wrong, I think that you sharing your valid concern and your own ideas is just as important. This is why having an educated third party (financial advisor) could really help with the direction you want to take.

How about you go to your bank and have them walk you through a loan preapproval. It doesn't cost anything and if you have credit issues they will let you know how it affects your ability to get a home loan and the rate. If you have recently had bad credit you may not even be able to qualify and it would be a moot point.
Good luck.

If you have an inheritance and credit problems? I would pay off any debt that I had. You don't say how much money is involved. So I don't know if it would be a down payment or enough to purchase outright...

Your husband needs to grow up. You cannot "Fix" your credit like that...the only way to "fix" your credit is by paying on time and paying the balances off. If there are ERRORS on your credit reports? You can fix them yourself by writing letters. Other than that? If the reports are accurate, then no amount of money is going to fix them.

Did you just post about your husband having a pay cut? and he wants to go out and spend money? Girl!! You both need a financial counseling class. You BOTH need to learn financial management.

You both might have success with marital counseling to get on the same page. he is being immature and reckless - you are TRYING to keep on an even keel - however - the communication is lacking....and money is one of the easiest things to fight over...you are VERY right - you are NOT ready for a mortgage.. YOU know this. He does not. But fighting over it is NOT the way to go about it. So.....make a list of bills/debts for him. Show him the costs of home ownership - insurance, maintenance, taxes, etc. and that's not cheap. And in Southern California where a $500K might get you a matchbox house??? He's in la-la land.

Breast Augmentation? That's about $10K if not more for a good surgeon to be done right. It might be less in CA since it's a typical procedure...I don't know. But really - that would be on the bottom of my list. Getting my debt paid off and building a savings would be my priority.

Good luck!

A home is a good investment and the interest rates are really low right now. Plus, you could probably own a home for less than you are paying in rent. (for example, the houses in our neighborhood rent for about $500 more than our mortgage, so it's actually cheaper to own).

Talk to a financial planner about house/car/kids savings.

Boob job should be last on the list unless you have medical reasons for it (pain, mastectomy, etc.). You are lovely just the way you are. Do not let breast size get in your head as important. That is "fun" money. The other stuff is life money. If your breast size is eating at your peace of mind, spend the money on counseling about that, because self esteem will not change just because a physical change is made.

Good luck!

I agree that buying a house is possibly a good investment if you can afford it especially on just one salary. And there are additional expenses with owning (taxes, insurance, repairs, etc.).

What strikes me is your husband's actions with money. You are or have been in debt. Your husband spends a large sum of money without consulting you especially since you're living on one paycheck. He sounds a lot like my (soon to be former) husband: wanting things but fiscally irresponsible. And he spent money on another fix-your-credit scam?

Please don't let him pressure you into spending your inheritance on something unless you're completely comfortable with it. I agree with other posters about getting some financial counseling and going to a bank or credit union to see what it would cost to get a home loan. You may find your credit isn't good enough to get a good interest rate. You may also find $15,000 isn't a large enough down payment because you'd have to pay closing costs out of that, reducing the amount you actually have available for a down payment. Plus you will need a little extra cash on hand to move into the place (paint, cleaning, turn on utilities, etc.) That may end the discussion right there.

Good luck on this decision.

It's the perfect time to buy a house. Prices are starting to move, very slowly, up so if you found the perfect house in the next few months you could easily sell this house down the road for a hefty profit.

So from an investment ideal he's totally right. A house payment right now might be lower than you think, if you used a large chunk of the money for a down payment you could spend some on trivial things.

A car can be here today and gone tomorrow with nothing to show for it. Only an insurance check that would buy something like you already have now.

My friend got a newer used car and her hubby drove it to work. On about the 4th trip home from work he fell asleep and hit a bridge, nearly died, and totaled the car. They had a LOT of issues with the car loan people even after the car was paid of in total from their insurance but they company kept taking the car payment out of their bank...they had to close that account to get it to stop then the company sued them.

So if you do go buy a car then something happens to it you have nothing to show for the money. At least with a house purchase if you have something happen the insurance would be enough to rebuild or get something else.

If there is enough money to pay the down payment and have some left over then I'd buy a house. Not even have to think about it.

The house doesn't have to be a mansion but it should have enough bedrooms and space for everyone to fit comfortably.