Trouble Getting 2 Yr Old to Fall Asleep at Night--No Problems at Naptime Though

Updated on November 21, 2008
K.F. asks from Boise, ID
8 answers

Hi,
I am wondering if any of you can offer any suggestions or insight into an issue we've been having with our 2 year old son. Here's the deal. Getting him to fall asleep for naptime is a breeze. He's out within five to ten minutes with little to no fuss. However, bedtime is a different story. He'll toss and turn and cry and sing and talk fro thirty minutes to an hour...every night...before finally succombing to sleep. Everything is virtually the same except 1) it's darker at night, of course. 2) we read books before bed at night 3) we spend more time getting him ready for bed. i.e. bathtime, pjs, brush teeth, etc. It's getting very tiresome, so any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you all!

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M.N.

answers from Denver on

I would have to agree with Marriah H. It sounds like he has his days and nights mixed up. My now almost 3 year old stopped taking naps around 2 1/2. She has always been a good sleeper though. On occasion I can get her to take an early nap, but if she takes one to late in the day, she won't go to bed until 9 or later. Her bedtime is 7-7:30. It all depends on the child. You may find that if you can get him to take a late morning nap that this will help him be tired enough for bed.

It is a fight almost every time when I try to get her to take naps. But some days it is worth the fight :o). Hope this helps.

-M.

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H.G.

answers from Denver on

I have the same problem with my 2 year old twin boys. We have tried a couple things that seem to work most of the time.
1) They each only get to pick one book for nap time and bed time and then before I read it I have them get "comfy" with their blankets and pillows. I pick a third calming book I read last.
2) We only do baths 3 times a week - they get so worked up during bath nights I try to start the bath at 6:30 so they have time to wind down.
3) They eat at 5:30 now with no exceptions - I was waiting until my husband got home but once I started just feeding them earlier bed time got earlier and they went down and slept better and longer. This was a duh moment for me:)
4) This one made the biggest difference of all. We moved them from separate beds to share a queen bed. One of my boys was waking up 3 - 5 times a night before we made the bed change and now he goes down in about 10 min and sleeps until at least 6am.
Hope this helps. Sleeping I have worked on quite a bit but if you ask me about potty training I am not doing nearly as well! LOL!!

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M.M.

answers from Denver on

K.,

You have described my life in detail. LOL. We have a gate over the door. (for my peace of mind incase I dont hear him up in the morning.) However, I gave up the fight and just let him "wind" down his way. He plays, he reads, he fights with his covers, eventually he is quiet. We just turn up the TV so we cant hear him as much. Ofcourse I notice you have twins so it may be a different issue than a single child. His room is ultra child proof. Good luck and dont stress about it. We all wind down differently, even as adults.

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T.T.

answers from Denver on

It sounds like he might be over tired. Try putting him to bed a little bit earlier. Even a half hour or twenty minutes earlier might make a difference. When kids get over tired they have a really hard time falling asleep. Give that a try and see if it helps. Otherwise, he might need that time to himself to wind himself down. If he's not throwing hysterical tantrums, I say let him lay there and talk and sing himself to sleep.

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L.F.

answers from Denver on

Hello
We recently had the same problem with my 2 1/2 year old son. The solution for us was shortening his naps from 2 1/2 hours (when he usually woke up on his own) to 1 or 1 1/2 hours. It also helps to get him outside every afternoon. Good luck!

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M.H.

answers from Boise on

Hi,
I have twins too :) I found that with my son he either needed to take shorter naps during the day or no nap at all. It was a hard transition for him, but he became a breeze to go to bed at night. We get up early and so they go to bed early so right after dinner we start the routine of bedtime and by 7 they are in bed and most times asleep. My boy is really insecure right now and so we gave him a big stuffed puppy that he loves and so as long as he has that and has music playing he falls asleep almost instantly. Try cutting his nap down by a half our and see if it gets easier.

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J.N.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I would cut the bedtime routine way down. It may actually be working him up. Move bathtime to another time (kids don't really need a bath every day anyway), and read books during the day too. Brush teeth after his last meal/snack. Help him get into pj's, cuddle for a few minutes and tell him a short story (this is good for kids' comprehension development too)or sing quietly to him. Tuck him into bed, kiss him goodnight, and go. As long as he is in bed and relatively quiet, don't worry that he's not asleep. He's learning to self-soothe.

It may be also that naptime is too long or he could stand to stay up for an extra half-hour. You may want to play with bedtime a bit to see.

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D.K.

answers from Denver on

I wouldn't worry too much about it if he falls asleep within a half hour.
My daughter takes a good 15 to 20 minutes to fall asleep and she is seven!! At that age she sang to herself, talked to herself and all that, think she still does it to get to sleep. Some kids are just different.
My son however, typically falls asleep at night in a minute or two after I leave the room! :)

Maybe push back the nap times or shorten them by 20 minutes. You didn't mention how long he naps for or what time he goes to bed. Start getting ready for bed a half hour earlier too.

The fact he is falling asleep so fast at naps means he is really tired, sometimes it just takes more time to settle in at night. Make sure he hasn't played rough, ate or drank anything with sugar before bed and let him talk to himself.
That way you know he isn't overstimulated. Make sure when reading it isn't with bright lights, keep things really calm while getting ready for bed. I wouldn't worry, let him fuss for a bit or do what he needs to get relaxed. Have a rule he has to stay in bed, just let him be.
Very normal at this age! :)

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