Trying for a Baby

I have three boys (ages 6, 4, 2). I won't lie, it is a bit of a challenge to have more children than you have hands. Unlike never before, my stroller and baby wrap came in very helpful in minimizing the more kids than hands problem which is mostly a problem when you are out away from the house. At home, they learn to wait or you learn to effectively separate them in order to manage the issues that arise (nursing while the other two start a fight). I learned to be a mobile nurser and also to plan a bit better and make sure that the older two are busy before beginning to nurse. (Luckily #3 was a quick nurser). In some ways it is harder now that #3 is older and they are all able to run. The older two inadvertantly let #3 out the door when we are places and #3 runs down the sidewalk. Don't worry too much about it though, that is why they start out as babies and get older gradually so that you have time to learn, adjust, and get better at managing. You'll do fine. I think the hardest adjustment from 2-3 is that you realize you just don't have as much control. You become more creative in your way of handling situations and you adapt. I think the reason that it isn't a big deal to add more after three is that you have already learned the skills to deal with more children than you have hands to hold, and so you can handle more. Many great things happen as well as the oldest starts to take responsibility and watches out for the youngest and when they all play together it is fantastic that they enjoy each other and have that bond. My youngest, of course, tries to do everything his older brothers do, so in a sense they grow up a bit faster, but we all have a blast together and I wouldn't have it any other way. I hope I have been helpful and if you have any other specific questions or concerns, or would like to talk more, let me know. Good Luck :)

Not trying to threadjack but I've had the same thoughts as far as having a second child. My first is easy-going and sweet tempered. Those of you who have more than one, including you, H., did you find your 2nd child was like your first or opposite in personality? Also how have you handled being pregnant and taking care of a child? I had a difficult pregnancy 1st go-round.

Hi H.,
I hope you guys have success trying for your 3rd baby! I have 3 children myself. I had a girl then a boy and thought I was set. One of each, enough hands for both, then an unexpected third. She is the sweetest child. The transition from 2 to 3 is hard - as almost anyone will tell you - but it is well worth it. I would recommend that if you and your husband are financially able and both in agreement, you try for a fourth later. The fourth rounds out the family, and children tend to naturally pair up, so there is no odd man out. Also, they help each other out more and tend to have fewer emotional security issues than families with 3 children. On the other hand, if you are looking for a little one that will pair up with YOU, and attach to you, one of the 3 will automatically do that. Regardless of what you decide I encourage you to involve them in Sunday school, since I have found this improves self discipline, patience, kindness, and hope. Excellent qualities in children. Best wishes to you and your family.
Jennifer

I have one daughter who is 3 and my husband and I have been trying for another baby for about a year. I was told I couldn't have kids, so when we had our daughter I was excited beyond words. Now we would like to have another, but I am nervous as well. It is so easy to do things with my daughter. She loves to travel and is very easy going. We do everything together and she is a big help and is a fun, fairly even-tempered little girl. What will happen if we do have another one that is nothing like her or even is like her, but still... I am nervous about changes yet I still want another one. I feel for you... My husband and I just continue to pray hard and trust that whatever happens, GOd will see us through it. Don't knoww if that helps much, but you are definitely not alone.

I have three daughters and it is definitely more work. Sometimes I think I liked it better when there were two, but I love my baby girl to pieces. She's just a different type of child. Good luck and in case you didn't know, you don't really have to try. If your menstruation is regular, you ovulate 14 to 16 days after the first day of your menstrual (no matter how long it stays on). You only ovulate 48 hours a month. You should be able to feel it and this is usually the time you are most aroused and your body may be warmer to the touch.

Hi H.! Three is an amazing blessing and a huge adjustment. You might want to read a posting I had out there - "Is there a difference between 3 kids and 4 kids". Most of the moms agreed that 3 was tough at first. There were days that I felt really overwhelmed, which had never happened with 2. It is a juggling act. Just last night I had to take the younger 2 to the oldest's activity practice. I was trapped with them in the minivan/area for two and a half hours! Today, I took the baby to the middle child's school to do some volunteer work, and then, my oldest (who still seems like a little one to me - 11 years old) beat me home from school by 5 minutes! I tried so hard to get back home on time, but I couldn't. I am in no way trying to discourage you. I love my 3 and want a 4th. I just was so shocked at how hard it was at first! But the good news is that it is totally doable, and everyday that the baby gets older it gets a little easier. You will be amazed at how competent and efficient you will quickly become. I also think it is good for the kids. They really learn about waiting, taking turns, helping out, teamwork, and the value of a dollar. Good luck to you, I hope that you guys make a beautiful and healthy little one.

While I am not trying for a baby, I am done. I do have 5 children and love my life. While I know 5 is not for everyone it is what fits for my Husband and I. We had 2 boys and tried for a 3rd and got twins. The boys are 12, 8, twins 4 and only girl is 2. It is scary thinking of how to handle them but with anything that is wanted/required you find a way to get it accomplished. Talk to your Hubby and make a decision together on what you want. With your Hubby being in the Marine Corps your life is a bit more on your own if he is deployed, my Hubby travels but is back in 3-4 days. I have seen Wives who respond that are Military Wives and hope they can help you as well. Good Luck!
Myself & my family Thank You for your Husband and the job he does!

We are trying for baby #2 :) I have a 3 year old little boy. We have been trying for almost 3 months now. We are hoping that it happens soon.

When I went off my birth control in July, I had a lot of anxiety about it, too. If you know that another child is right for your family everything will work out :)

Well, I'd say YES, but we found out last week that we're expecting! :D It really was a relief because it took 15 months for our first child, and we were really hoping it wouldn't take that long again! I'm also wondering how things will go having two, but as my daughter is finally--FINALLY--learning to sleep through the night and is potty training as well, I'm feeling like things will work out.

I hear from lots of people that once you have three, adding more isn't really all that different (even from one lady who had like eight kids!). So, really, once you get that 3rd child and get the hang of that, you've got it made! Just think of it that way! :)

(yeah, marines!)

H.,
My husband and i are also trying for baby #3, with little success. I am also a stay at home mom of 2 wonderful boys, 5 and 2 1/2, and we are ready to expand. But with the declining economy, we are at odds whether to expand now or not. Although we would be overjoyed to add to our family, we are worried about the extra strain on our financial situation. My 5 year old will be starting kindergarten this coming August and that will ease the noise in the house for a few hours. But I am also worried about him adjusting to a new environment seeing as he has never been in school before. But I also know that another baby will add joy and happiness to our house, as it has in the past. We waited a bit longer to have another than we did after our first, but we find the timing is right. We believe that God does not give us more than we can handle and we take things one day at a time. I hope my advice has been helpful. Good luck with #3!

Hi! I'm thinking about baby number 2 and am terrified. My 14 month old is a handful and I'm at home with her all day. My husband works 6 days a week and it seems like a bazillion hours so he's not much of a wingman to me! We have moved twice with his job since I got pregnant and may move again in 6 months. I'm so tired and don't know anyone and have no family to help out that I hate that that is playing a big part in my decision to have another baby. Another fact is that I'm 38 and time isn't on my side. My OB who delivered my daughter said I should have baby #2 within 2 years due to my age. So now I feel this pressure to make my mind up fast. I know that I really don't want Erin to be an only child. I'm just so scared that I won't have the patience and strengh and money to juggle 2! I can't imagine 3!!!! Good luck! I'm sure if you can handle 2, you can do 3!!!!

Don't worry. Your heart is telling you that you would like to add another little lovely to your life. I have 4. I adopted my teens at age 8 and 9 when I got married to a single dad. Then we had two more.So they are 17,16,5, and 3. Puberty and toddlers all at once. The truth is that you find the time and the space and the money. You will be fine on all of it as long as you are bringing that child into a happy home. Kids are a blessing. No matter how many kids you have, you always feel stretched, tired and underappreciated. With one or with seven, it is a challenge. having kids close in age is hard on you but a gift to them. They will be close and grow up knowing that when they have no other friend in the world, they have eachother.This will definitely come into play with our military lifestyle. They will enter every new school or neighborhood already having two best friends. Good luck, I am so excited for you. The more the merrier!