Hi alll:
I live a commuter's lifestyle as does my darling 16-month-old. We've logged many miles together and I am happy to have her as my passenger :-).
I try my best to engage her in "conversation" during our 40 minute ride. This may consist of me asking her what a certain animal says, showing me her arm, bellybutton, etc., or just plain singing.
The system works except when I want downtime. She seems OK with it, unless she's fussy, but I end up feeling guilty for not talking or singing the whole ride.
Has anyone experienced this and if so, how did you deal?
This is all very helpful, thank you. I feel more human about needing downtime to recharge. I think kid's CDs are a great idea. She does have books to keep her company, too.
Sometimes I hit a wall and can't focus on anymore talk about trains or baseball or make believe monsters. At that point, I tell them mommy loves this song, lets sing along with the radio for a while. Then I turn it up and tune them out!
My daughter is a talker, really from the moment she wakes to the moment she goes down she is talking.
Here is what I say in the house when I need some quiet time "when someone asks for alone time that means no talking to them for awhile"
Here is what I say in the car when I need some quiet time "mommy needs to concentrate on driving, quiet time please"
Now it does not always work, she is 5 years old so has a lot to say. When it dose work it is nice. Sometimes it is needed, I do not feel guilty because if I do not ask for it I will snap and be grumpy which I do not want to do towards my daughter.
For the car we have a small container with other things she can do like books, car games, stuff animals, books that make sounds (if you can handle it), CDs that play fun kids music (may I recommend the Laurie Berkner Band and They Might Be Giants ABC, 123, Science albums... these CDs I even love to sing along with not just your typical kid music).
My friend logs a lot of hours in the car with her now two yr old. They play CDs and before age two the child was asking for her favorite specific songs. I didnt have a CD player in car but always kept a box of lift the flap, touch and feel books. She might be old enough for an aqua doodle toy. Have a few things like this that she can only play with in the car. Keep some hidden in the car to pull out in "emergencies"
E
You don't have to entertain her the whole time. You might put in a song CD for her part of the trip and learn new songs to sing (Lavender's Dilly Dilly is a great one (approximation of name, I just borrowed it, can't remember the title and it is in the VAN!))
She should be able to watch the world go by outside the window and think her thoughts. She might nap. She probably won't.
Fussy? Stop. Plan extra time into the ride, just like you would for a traffic jam. Hold her. Can't stop that often? That's okay, at least you are stopping once. Turn around and play peekaboo at red lights (even just once!)
Another toy that is great for the car is colored silks. She can do ANYTHING with them - pretend, wave, whatever she can come up with. At that age she will probably wind up just waving them, but later they can become a tent, a colored viewing portal, shade, so many things, it's really such an open-ended toy.
Good luck,
M.
I turn up the country music and we all sing along.
Can she look at books in the car? Some kids get car sick so it might not work, but maybe if you had special car toys or books or something for those times, she could be getting her special treat while you had some quiet. Do you have a portable DVD player? Might be worth getting a used one off Craigslist or something and when you need downtime, tell her she is getting a special movie treat for just certain days. I don't even have a long commute, but some days, the talking and questions just get to be too much. Good luck!
