TV Time for My 4Yr Old

Updated on October 17, 2011
J.J. asks from Garland, TX
11 answers

Sorry this turned out to be a venting session for me...lol a little too long.
So I do not watch TV (1. i dont have time, 2. I try to not turn it on 3. i'll fall asleep before the show is over cuz I'm soo tired!) My husband on the other hand reaches for the remote before he even opens his eyes in the morning, and falls asleep with the tv on at night. Well needless to say, my 4yr old picks up after daddy...especially becuase there was about a yr and a half where my husband was home with him, and they both watched tv ALLLLLL DAYYY. and I was working long hours so Ihad no control over the 2. plus, my son would eat everything we give so we would turn on the TV to distract him just so we can feed him. Starting this summer he is starting to eat better, sits at the dinner table (for the most part) but television is on ALLLL DAY LONG... its tiring for me to have to hear it. Example: he woke up yesterday morning reaching for the remote and watched tv till i came out of the bathroom, then we went to the living room, he turned the tv on, and watchedwhile eating his waffles. got dressed (after pausing the tv) came back from church and turned the TV on before he even changed his clothes....then i finally turned it off while he took a nap, but it came right back on once he woke up. sometimes he just wants it on, but he's playing something on the computer or our phones. I AM TIRED OF IT.

I want to change the routine around so he only watches an hr the most, but just dont know how to occupy the rest of his time...especially since it also helps me cook and do house chores while he's watching tv. i feel like if the tv isnt on, then i am required to sit with him the entire time...i would love to, but i work full time, and i can only spend so much time between dinner, his bath, my bath, cleaning kitchen, paying bills and tiding up the house. How do you occupy your child's time?
Thank you sooo much for reading through this novel !! :0)

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for hearing me out, and giving ideas...I also see its a lot easier if he had a sibling...she is on her way jsut a little shy of a month...and hopefully the new baby sister will be the spotlight and we can wean him off of ALL DAY TV habit...sigh...

More Answers

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K.H.

answers from Boston on

Maybe you can slowly reduce the amount of time he watches tv and replace with other activities so those become the new routine. While I'm making dinner, my oldest (6) does homework. I give my 3 year old a white board or paper and have her practice writing/coloring etc. I talk to both girls while I cook.

For chores, I try to break things up. I fold a load of laundry in the living room while my daughter does a puzzle. Sometimes she is okay with playing next to me even though I don't have to give her 100% of my attention.

Does your son have any interests (puzzles, building with legos, coloring etc)? You could give him tasks to do while you clean (e.g. can you find 10 red legos and try to build a tower? See if you can do this puzzle before I fold this load of laundry.)

When all else fails, just hide the remote!

Good luck!

3 moms found this helpful
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M.M.

answers from Fresno on

My girls are now 5 and 6 and what I did for them to avoid so much tv is I purchased a basket, color crayons and pencils, notebooks and erasers, scissors and glue and I set it on the table so that they could draw pictures. Since I'm mostly in the kitchen after work, I like them to sit where I'm at. That way we can talk about what they are drawing and what shape they are cutting out etc. It's amazing how much kids know and the things they are able to draw. They actually draw pretty good pictures and when they are done they will magnet their drawing to the fridge. It's so cute! So yea maybe get a basket and some school supplies and sit him down in an area that your gonna be in. Good luck!

3 moms found this helpful
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B.E.

answers from New York on

I once read somewhere - can't remember where - that it never hurts a kid to get bored every now and then. Often, out of boredom, they create something interesting to do.

I sure know how it is with an only child. Mine is 4 too. He always wants to play, play, play with me and, if I can't, he begs to watch TV. Yesterday I had a huge yard project that had to get finished. I told him he could either come outside with me and play with his lawn toys or play inside, but he couldn't have TV until 4:00, which was about an hour away. He protested and whined and sulked inside for about 10 minutes. Then I heard him playing with his toys (he's big on narrating along with his play sessions). When I asked him at 4:00 if he wanted his TV show, he said "Not now, later." He was having too much fun playing on his own.

Since your son's TV habit is so ingrained, you will probably have to slowly whittle his TV time down, but you will find more and more that he is capable of entertaining himself for decent stretches of time when you can't play with him.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

"We’ve let T.V. dictate what food they will eat, what kind of manners they will have, what kind of vocabulary they will use, how they will view the opposite sex, etc. Think about this….who else would you let arbitrarily into your children’s lives (with such strong opinions!) the way you let T.V. in?!"

That's my thought but I'm a bit radical in this arena.

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K.S.

answers from Miami on

I know its hard when you have an only child. You become is play mate too. Do you have a safe play area for him in his back yard?
Try turning on some kid music and turn the tv off. Tell him the truth to much tv. I would enjoy the time he wants you aroudn though because he will grow up real fast. I'd let the house be a little messy and take him to thepark instead.

1 mom found this helpful

I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

Its hard to change it up when t.v. is so effective in getting them to stay in one place out of your way! Mine is also 4. Play dough, and arts and crafts are one thing I can set up for mine to keep her occupied. Also, I have T.V. times and non T.V. times of day. For example she can not watch it first thing in the morning, or in the afternoon. Only when baby sister naps, and one show after dinner. So when she asks for it, I don't tell her no. I tell her wait. She gets two tv slots a day.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.G.

answers from Detroit on

My daughter does not watch TV without permission. she is not to turn it on by herself. i would start with this rule. second rule...no tv during meals. this should be a time for you to talk and enjoy each other. it will be hard at first for him to get used to playing on his own. he may not even be willing to at first, but try to break tv times up throughout the day. you do not have to play with him every second. he is 4, he is able to play on his own. help him get started by getting out somethign (blocks, superheroes, etc.) and when he starts playing, get up and walk away. his imagination shoudl take over. kids are built to play and imagine all day! try to use the tv for times when you really need to concentrate on something. otherwise, if necessary, involve him in what youa re doing, cleaning, cooking, etc. these steps should help to make tv an activity, rather than a companion.

1 mom found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

We're pretty lenient about tv, and my husband also watches way too much, but I agree that it's not healthy to have it on all the time.
At four years old he should be able to play independently, you shouldn't always have to sit with him. He may whine at first but just smile and say, no tv right now, you can play, do puzzles, look at books, color/draw, whatever he likes to do. You could also have him help you in the kitchen which is a great way to spend time together while getting something done :)

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

I turn the TV off.
My kids, occupy themselves, pretty well.
I tell them, enough tv, that's all, go and play.
And they do.
I don't really have to entertain them, while I cook or do chores.
And even if my kids are watching TV, I don't have to, nor am I 'required'... to just sit there and watch it with them. I am in the room but doing chores. My kids watch what is appropriate, they know what they are allowed to watch and what is not allowed. So I don't have to worry and 'sit' with them on the sofa when they are watching tv and I have a million other things to do.
My son is now 5, but even when he was younger, he does other things. Not just watch tv.
I tell my kids "time to turn it off..." and they do.

Your HUSBAND... though, needs a different routine.
He seems, to be really into the TV. Which is where, your child... got the TV habit from. From your Husband.

Again, a child needs to and can, occupy their time. They can play. In the same room you are doing chores in.
You explain to them.

1 mom found this helpful

M.L.

answers from Houston on

We don't have tv, but we watch movies/shows through streaming netflix through the xbox. So, for us, we can set a timer on the xox. You can also set a kitchen timer, and when it goes off, it's time to turn off the tv. My kids are like your son... they want to watch tv or play video games all day long. We have zero tv rule for eating meals though. Also, tvs are not allowed in bedrooms, major no-no. And on Sundays, no tv is allowed, expect for religious shows, since it is our day of rest and family days.

So, when the timer goes off, they have to do a new activity so the tv can rest. Leggos, cars, building blocks, practicing their letters, go outside and play, color, puzzles, compute games on starfall.com , make a craft, cut pictures out of a magaize and glue it on a collage, play with stamps, water paint, look at books, play dough, help me clean...

Right now, I feel awful due to morning sickness, so the tv is on a lot more than I would like out of convenience for me. But I will get back to enforcing the rules and doing more activities soon.

You just have to make your guidelines and sick to them. It's better to inteill healthy habits when they are young. If you need an hour to work or cook, put something on, but be selective... do a Leap Frog learning dvd or something along those lines.

Also, is there anyway your son can join a playgroup or mothers day out program once or twice a week? It would be so beneficial for him to have playmates and activity during the week.

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C.M.

answers from Hartford on

Put on a video/DVD. That way, when its over, its OVER and its time for the TV to be turned off.

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