Tying Shoes - Newton,IA

I still cannot do it using the one loop way, I use 2 loops or "bunny ears" - maybe try that with him instead of the more popular way?

However we HAD to learn it at my kindergarten, they wouldn't pass you if you didn't know it back in the day.

Have someone else teach him (or try to). I also don't know many high school kids that tie their shoes either most have their shoes dragging and/or slipping off (like their pants, lol).

You may want to get him shoes with laces for the summer so that he won't have much of a choice.

I was in just about every accelerated and gifted program our school had to offer...also played piano...involved in other things...and didn't learn to tie my shoes until I was 9 (4th grade). No clue as to any hints...just wanted to let you know...he's not the only one :p. I remember going back to visit my 3rd grade teacher one day after school....she told me to tie my shoes, I said I didn't know how and I'd take them off at home anyway...she told me that was crazy and sat down with me and insisted I learn...lol. Maybe enlist the help of another adult? Maybe it's because it's 'you' (no offense...sometimes that's just the way it is...) Good luck!

ETA: I don't think it's so much needing a simpler way of tying or explaining...if a 4 year old can learn, a gifted 8 year old is certainly not lacking in brains...and given that he plays piano...I don't know that it's necessary a struggle for his fingers to accomplish it. Looking back, I think for me...it was just a mental thing :p. It really was like my brain did not want to learn it. I had a major mental block....or maybe I was just stubborn...(some things don't change... :p).

I've had many moms tell me that they taught their kids with a robe belt. Take your standard bath robe, have him sit on the floor and try tying his legs together with the belt.

The "bunny ear" method is the easiest way I know. Go on YouTube and google "Bunny ear method of tying shoes"

My grandma taught us by using 2 different colored laces tacked to a board.
Something about seeing how the 2 colors intertwined with each other made sense.

I think lots of us have things that cause our brains to short circuit. I had a hard time telling left from right. It took a Kindergartener telling me, "your left hand makes an L" (with the thumb & index finger) that it finally clicked. I think I was in middle school at the time.

Don't worry about it too much. One day it will click for him. In the meantime, I'd suggest Vans shoes. They make a slip on tennis shoe and the kids think they are cool.

Get another kid to teach him perhaps. Stop buying velco footwear besides by the time he hits high school there are no velcro footwear.

What motivates him? Is it toys? Praise? Movies? A surprise family outting to his favorite place? Sometimes offering up these things helps. Even a conversation like this may also help, this weekend you are going to work on learning how to tie your shoes so get ready. Then talk about how he is feeling about learning how to do it all week. Pour positive words into him the entire time. Then when Saturday rolls round, practice shoe tying in 15 minute intervals and make the breaks in between something fun like playing a game for 15 minutes then return to trying tying the shoe.

It is easy to quit and hard to stick to it. It took me years to learn how to ride a two wheeled bike. I'd fall off or end up in the bushes and I'd table trying again until the next year. I must have been about almost 9 years old when I finally got it. My sister was 5 and riding her bike two wheeled a few weeks before me.

I hope this helps. Keep us posted.

FYI It has been said that Albert Einstein could tie his shoes either. Not bad company.

He won't want to wear velcro in high school either. He'll learn when he has incentive. Lots of 8 yr olds still wear velcro shoes, so it's not a big deal yet. Shoe tying doesn't have anything to do with intelligence. It's a fine motor skill, so maybe for now just work on strengthing his fine motor abilities. Here's a link with some suggestions:

http://www.ot-mom-learning-activities.com/fine-motor-acti...

Enlist the help of dad. I wasn't doing a bang-up job of teaching my son either, but my husband did in about 2 days. Son was 4. I used the more complicated method (the RIGHT way, lol) of the rabbit running around the tree and down thru the hole. My husband did bunny ears (2 loops tied together).

For those who have said "he won't wear velcro in High School".. te he... I work with a man who is 56 years old and still wears velcro shoes b/c he doesn't want to tie his shoes. He said he isn't very good at it and got tired of always retieing them - so he wears these ugly velcro shoes. :)

Good luck - he will get it.

which way did u try teaching him bunney ears? or loop swoop n pull (i dont know what else to call it but thats what adam sandler called it in the movie big daddy i thought it was cute)

I remember practicing quite a bit, in pre-K, and doing it over and over with older cousins.

Not quite the same, but I was about 8 at the time. I knew how to tie my shoes, but I wouldn't double knot them. They would quickly come undone. frustrated with having to wait for me to tie my shoes yet again, my mom gave me an ultimatum, then carried it out. If I see you with your shoes untied again, you can walk barefoot. I was absolutely mortified to walk about the length of a city block in nothing but socks.

My shoes have never been unlaced again.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.

LOL--when you do buy tie shoes, they all just jam their feet into the already-tied shoes anyway!

This was suggested on here & worked REALLY well for us:

Use the belt of a bath robe and have him sit and practice tying the belt around his thigh.

(Easier to get it down pat because the belt is larger & easy to see what's going on!)

Have a friend/peer teach him. Reward HIM AND the FRIEND (student and the teacher) when he successfully ties his shoes and then reward them again when he masters it completely.

I had a student in 3rd grade ("Joe") who could not tie his shoes. He was the only one in the class. He often wore velcro shoes, but also had tie shoes at one point. In PE one day Joe's shoes became untied and he could not get them tied back together. The PE teacher asked for someone to help him and a peer volunteered. From then on, the PE teacher and this boy helped teach Joe how to tie his shoes. The PE teacher rewarded both boys when Joe finally mastered the laces. A win-win-win-win for the PE teacher, the peer teacher, Joe, and Joe's parents.

What's the big deal - just get him velcro.

There are all kinds of intelligences. Schools teach to language & math. If he's in the gifted program he's really good with language & math skills. But the other types of intelligence include music, people skills, atheletics and spatial skills. Home builders and engineers have excellent spatial skills but they might not be able to write out a few paragraphs or pages due to their difficulty with language skills. Chill on the shoe tying. I can guarantee that the time will come when he'll want to make it a priority and he'll learn it. Until then what's the big deal with velcro? He's 8 right? Worry if he still has the problem at 18. ;o)

DS who is 8.5 just figured it out. He would also get frustrated when DH or I tried to work with him on it. Finally he came home from school and announced he knew how to do it. He said he just kept practicing at school till he got it. Nice that he learned but I think he was trying to avoid doing his schoolwork. ;)

My 10 year-old still wears velcro shoes. She can tie shoes, but it takes her so long we both get frustrated. Not worth it. Get the velcro.

If he does not want to do it he is not going to do it even if he knows how. He will just walk around with them untied. I would rather just do something fashionable like sketchers Z strap and let it go.

there are plenty of nice looking loafers he can wear in high school:)sorry i have no advice , my boys are 5 and 7 and still are in velcro shoes or crocs.......I only have slip on shoes :) MY 7 year old does know how to tie his shoes he learned it from Max and Ruby(the cartoon:))