I have a 2 1/2 year old. She's my first child and I find she leaves a DISASTER wherever she goes. I have to lock her out of her room unless I sit with her one on one the whole time because she will pull every book down and play and pull clothes out of her drawers etc. If there is a can of coffee on the counter and I make the mistake of going to the bathroom alone and come back, very often she has pulled a stool or something over and managed to dump coffee on the floor. She's not mean or destructive about it, just wants to see what everything is . I can get her to put things back (carry her cups and plates to the sink, put her puzzle pieces back etc,) but it seems like I am ALWAYS surrounded by misc scattered toys everywhere.
My questions are this:
1. Is this normal and do all kids do this or is it just mine?
2. Do you pick up EVERYTHING ALL the time? or leave it messy?
Just wondering. Its not that serious and i am sure in some ways it gets better as she gets older etc
Wow! So I got totally different responses from everyone. I still don't know what to expect!! haha. Some of the responses I got were a bit....Overzealous I thought. But I asked for it, right? I just can't imagine calling and OT or some agency and saying "my 2.5 year old sure makes a big mess....A LOT. I think I need an evaluation." I mostly wanted to see if you all had any special cool toys or tricks to get a small child to "enjoy" picking up around the house.
To clarify, she mostly plays with her own stuff and she DOES indeed play with them (not just m essy). Shell pull all the books from the shelf, "read them" and then go onto something else. I think she gets bored of her things and then goes for mine (I find my hairbrush is wierd places too). She doesn't have to be in her room very long for it to be destroyed and I do have locks on all the kitchen cabinets, every door is locked (except her room for part of the day, the ulilty room (cuz that is where the litter box is), and the bathroom (in case she decides to pee). She has managed to pull clothes out EVEN with the child locks (I hate that) and she literally puts on MULTIPLE outfits throughout the day. PS She does gymnastics twice a week, goes fishing with my husband in our canal outback and feeds the ducks most days, has a outside that she runs in, etc so she doesn't get physical activity. Im just getting burnt out!
Totally normal. Good time to start teaching her how to clean up her messes. She won't do great, but it's a lesson none the less.
Totally normal! My family room is pretty much ALWAYS a mess in one way or another. We pick up here and there, but there is always something on the floor. Thats what the room is for for us! Then i dont feel guilty. The one thing I do pay attention to is that when the toys get put away, all the pieces stay together.
Hey room is usually a bit messy. She has two collections of toys in there. Her kitchen set and some little people. Also books and stuffed animals. Every few days I have to pull back all her blankets to get the random toys out.
At 2.5, she should know better than doing this,
I am sure you have told her "books are for reading not for throwing on the floor." Have her place them back on the shelves when she does this, EVERY time.
"Clothes stay in the dresser". Have her help put them back in the dresser, EVERY time.
"We do not climb up on the stool." "Only mom or dad can give you permission to be on the stool or helping in the kitchen.."
Until she can control her curiosity, "by looking with our eyes not with our hands." Child proof your kitchen before she discovers the knives in the drawers and nobs on the stove.
It is good for children to have curiosity, but as parents we have to teach them about the rules of behaviors. It for their safety,.
And NO, YOU should not be the only one cleaning it up.
It is normal in so far as a 2.5 year old will make a big mess if left to her own devices. However, it sound like you need to shave better boundaries for her. For instance, since old enough to walk, my daughers know that in my room, they simply may not touch my stuff. Nothing. My youngest now can bring in some toys or ask to see something, but she can's "smash and dash." Same in the other rooms, some things are simply off limits. I think you need to make some more rules and provide some more sicipline. Otherwise, this will get dangerous quickly - meds, scissors, heavy jars, etc. She needs to be clear on what is not touchable - mom and dad's stuff - at least without asking first.
As far as toys go, yeah, a good part of the day the playroom is a mess, but we have homes for everything and try to straighten up as we go at least a little. I draw the line at toys all over "my" part of the house. Anything that ends up in the living room or kitchen is put aaway as soon as it is abandoned. And my kids clean up themselves, with guidance of course.
i'm totally LMAO, not at you girl, believe me, b/c it's like you live here...with me & my 2 yr DS...and our constant array of matchbox cars, pieces of puzzles, MY hairbrush that somehow managed to get in the living room, one of his shoes in my bedroom...omg, the list goes on and on!! :)
i've wondered this before too...if other moms keep picking it up. well, idk, but i'm far from a neat freak, but it makes me nutzoid to come home & go to bed w/a frazzled house. i just feel so much better when i can see the floor in it's totality (mostly) and i'm not stubbing my toe on his millions of trucks! :)
and my little boy's is like your little girl...i don't think he's doing it to be mean or destructive, but it sure is annoying & frustrating sometimes!!!
so it's normal, but it's aggrevating sometimes ain't it?! :)
btw...on the wknds, i tell myself, "let it ride, clyde"....then i pick it up sometime before sun evening. :)
I think this is totally normal behavior. Children of that age have no idea of what it takes to clean up after them. My five year old has improved somewhat but we still call him Hurricane Harry because of the trail of devastation he can leave behind him.
She is old enough now that she can help to clean up some of her mess. Let her help put the books back on the shelf, clothes back in the drawers. Teach her that she is responsible for the mess she makes and she will probably ease off a little with the destruction. I dont mean that she should put away every single thing that she has got out because that could be a whole new battle, but just have her start helping more with the clean up. I tend to have the kids clean up most of their stuff now as their older but when they were younger I would make them claen up a certain amount of it and then do the rest after they went to bed.
Good luck with your little "hurricane", it gets easier (honest)
It sounds very normal to me. That's they way they explore at that age. My son's three and a half and just getting the age where he'll get out, say, less than five things in his room most days.
I would not lock her out of her room unless there's something dangerous in there. If there are too many toys to clean up everyday, store some of them for a while. Instead of having a "place" for each toy, use bins so clean-up is just throwing stuff in. And I do clean up every day with my kids--how else are they going learn to do it? We use the preschool clean up song, we have "races" to see who can put the last block in the bin, etc. and we don't expect the three year old to clean up more than a couple of things (we do 90 percent).
You also might consider giving her something she can dump--I have a plastic box of mixed dried beans. My son uses plastic cups and spoons and has a blast with them. (I put it on a cookie tray with edges to contain runaways.) Of course, that requires supervision. Or I let him play with bubbles and water in the sink when I'm doing dishes.
It's normal in my opinion!
At 2.5 she should know what is expected of her. My son never got in to things that he wasn't supposed to, and honestly, I don't really know many 2.5 year olds that do. I think that it is good for kids to be curious, but as parents, we need to set boundaries.
My son knew then (and now) that he doesn't just help himself to things that aren't his. Even snacks in the pantry at his level need to be asked for first. He may be able to reach, but that doesn't mean he does.
As for her room, if she makes a mess, she needs to help you clean it. At 2.5 she definitely understands these things and needs to be held accountable. She is still little, but if you set boundaries and rules now, she will know what is expected of her. Good luck!
Unfortunately, I don't think it's normal. My 2.5 year old son does not go into anything. And we have an open kitchen. He only plays with his things. And even so, he doesn't dump things everywhere. He doesn't touch his things for any reason but to play with it. Otherwise, it stays in its place. We have a bookshelf for my kids with TONS of books and both my 5 & 2 year olds, only get one book at a time when they want to read.
It sounds to me that your daughter has been told what is appropriate, but may not be understanding,or just gets a kick out of pulling things apart or dumping things.
Either way, a 2.5 should know better.
Leave her room, maybe if it is the way she wants it- it is after all her room.
Child proof the rest to the best of your ability. Let her know this is yours, and that is hers. Let her do with hers.
best, k
As far as I know, it is completely normal .... I wish I could tell you when it ends but I have yet to find out for myself! I have two girls, 4.5 & 6. The older one is great at cleaning up after herself (with a little reminder), but the younger one tests my nerves daily! She takes out what seems like every single toy in the playroom and never puts anything away - I tell her all the time to put things away before bringing anything else out but it goes in one ear and out the other. I am the type of person who believed that there is a place for everything and everything should be in its place - I used to straighten up and put thuings away like 10 times a day, but then I learned to back off and just let it be until the evening (bedtime), then I backed off more and sometimes now even let the mess be there for days at a time - unless someone is comign over of course! The funny thing is that although it looks like a tornado came through the room, it never takes more than a couple of minutes to clean it up ... unless i make the kids do it and then it takes over an hour! I know this may not help you much, but at least you know you're not alone!
Our daughter is almost 5 and still the same. It is a battle. We are on her regularly to clean up but this is a constant thing. We do clean up most of the time sometimes I am just tired and leave it til tommorrow. I am still wondering if it will ever stop, our 7 year old son was never like she is some days it is overwhelming. Good Luck you are not in the boat alone.
normal. keep her busy so she doesn't make any new messes - get her to help you clean them up.
sounds normal to me. If not my 2.5 year old is in crazy land with yours lol. I sometimes feel like i follow her around cleaning and their is a trail of mess once I circle back. they like organizing/sorting at this age, maybe you could distract her with some really cool sorting toys, or some different colored beads (or something of the sort) to organize in to an egg carton.
Sounds like the days when my son was like that. Busy busy busy. I was so scared to have a 2nd child because he just constantly. stayed. busy. I NEVER got to sit down or take a shower if I was home alone with him. I felt like everyone else had the perfect little angelic kids... and HOW did they manage to stay so "together" all the time?! What was Wrong with me??
I often felt incompetent. But I wasn't. Just a very very busy busy curious child.
My daughter (born when my son was about to turn 3) was a "dream child". If everyone else's kids are like her, then no WONDER everyone else always seemed to have their s__ together.
You are not alone. It is not "normal" in the sense that ALL kids are not like that. But it is not "abnormal" really either. She is just going to be a lot of work for awhile. One day, her curiosity will pay off for her though.
Enjoy her ability to find joy in the simple things, lol. :)
<<HUGS>>
This makes me wonder if she needs moe brain organization. A 2.5 yr old should not be like that. That is wayyy outside the norm. Try OT. She may not know where she is in time and space and she is trying to use all these things to help her feel grounded.
1. Yep! My two year old can often play happily... but just as often she is causing mischief. Silence is the key- if she is too quiet, and she is not asleep- she is causing trouble!
2. I always get everything cleaned up- but if she makes a mess, she has to help clean it! If you clean up the messes as they occur, you'll end up with less of a "house explosion" to deal with at the end of the day. That said... her room sometimes stays a little "messy" until I have time to go in and do clean up time with her. Try to keep a small toybox in the living room (or nearby) and all her other toys in her room. Having toys that are OK to play with may help prevent her from making mischief with things you DON'T want her getting into! (At least some of the time)
Good Luck Mama!
-M.
