Video Games - Red River,NM

My kids are 14 and 11. We don't have set rules but homework and chores must be done first. They also need to do something physical. Like my son will have the neighbor kids over to jump on the trampoline or he goes over there. Same thing on weekends, just depends on what we are doing. I don't really see the difference between them on the video games and us watching cartoons all day when we were little. I guess if it makes him "moody, intense and high strung" I would monitor it more and limit it. Good luck.

Mine gets screen-time once per week, that's it. But he's a bit younger and not especially moody or high-strung. I get that we're dealing with two different kids. But one thing I wonder, before you just take video games away, is if you could replace them with another form of relaxation. I'm specifically thinking of physical exercise / outdoor time / sports. Not every kid likes every sport -- Lord knows mine doesn't -- but outdoor exercise if flat-out a more effective, less detrimental form of stress release.

2 hrs a day on schools days and unlimited time on weekends.

I didn't limit video game time at all. As long as chores and homework/reading were done, and as long as he was playing a sport and/or getting plenty of exercise, I let my son play as much as he wanted.
I just couldn't see limiting his favorite hobby for no good reason. He was a good, happy kid with lots of friends so why shouldn't he spend his free time as he wishes? Of course the games were always age appropriate.
Your son MIGHT actually be happier if he's allowed to play more, not less.

Interesting--my impression is that our 11-year old son gets moody and a bit strung out when he has had more screentime, not less. Just shows that every kid is different! Anyway, our official rule is no screen (that's tv, DVDs/videos, internet/computer games, etc) on school nights and 2 hours per day on the weekends. Now, I know the kids get some time during the week because the afterschool care on our campus lets them use the computer lab W and F for an hour and a half and often has a movie going when we pick up at 5:30. I think we can get away with not allowing screen time during the week because after school time is pretty packed with activities (Tae Kwon Do, cross country, and Rocket-making class for the boy, dance+art+ Girl Scouts for the girl). By the time we get home, it's time for dinner and bed. Occasionally we do get complaints about the no screen rule, but only on the days when they don't have anything else.

If it works for you to make the screen time an incentive for doing his homework and other responsibilities, keep doing it. You don't say how much you do allow right now; personally, I think more than an hour a day during the week would be too much, however I am pretty ambivalent about computer/video games generally. Good luck!

An hour or two of screen time (tv/computer/device) per day is plenty for recreational purposes.
What ever did we use to do before all that was invented?
read
play cards
build legos
do jigsaw puzzles
play outside
climb trees
make snow forts
rake leaves
do chores
clean our rooms (or what ever needed cleaning)
walk the dog
shoot hoops
ride our bikes
etc
If your son needs to burn off some energy, then sign him up for taekwondo.

My husband and I both work with technology - we each sit in front of a computer for at least 40 hrs per week (often longer).
Our philosophy is this:
As they get older and into higher grades and college, they'll be spending more time on computers.
Right now is when they have a real chance to run free, play and be kids.
They've got the rest of their lives to sit in front of a machine.
Screen time is nothing they need to over dose on for right now.

We don't time it and it can vary from day to day. Some days the TV/video games/computers never get turned on, other days it seems to never get turned off.
Screen time isn't just video games in our house, it can be TV time or computer time as well.
To us, the most important thing is that they get their responsibilities taken care of and they get some sort of physical activity at various points of the day and that screen time does not replace or get in the way of it.
I don't see it as the evil that some people insist it is.
If we notice behaviour issues (if Spongebob ends up on that screen they are terrible! Ugh!) or they aren't getting their stuff done they do loose it though.

I wish I could say I limit my kid's screen time to 1h our a day or week, but at 10 and 6years and the fact so much of their homework and learning is on "screens" just not feasible.

So the kids come home on a bus, and have about 45 min. Then they have homework, football/park time and then dinner. Since it gets dark, they get another hour or two before bed.

Weekends, I let them go hog wild. Believe it or not, they get BORED of it and WANT to go play other things (legos, games, park, with the dog, etc).

I think there is a way to monitor and make sure he doesn't spend an inordinate amount of time on it, but you'd be surprised how they regulate themselves.

Note: we didn't really do video games or screens until the oldest was about 7. . .

1 hour of screen time total as a base. And that is any screen. So let's say my kids already watched a 20 minute show....they then have 40 minutes to play games. But then we also use them as incentives. In homeschool if they have an awesome day we have "reward sticks" where I have something written on them. Some sticks have things like extra 20 minutes of video games or rent a movie. That time is not included in the 1 hour so when they get something like that they really appreciate it.

60 percent of the time I stick to that 1 hour. Sometimes I have off days where if our house is super gross or I am sick then they get more time.

EDIT- My kids become extremely snappy if they play all day so that very rarely happens

My three boys (ages 7, 9 & 15) all like video games, way too much. So this year, we started taking away the controllers and cords on Sunday night and they get them back on Friday afternoon. So for us, no gaming at all M-Th. My kids do watch TV though, and we're not great about monitoring time. Maybe an hour or two a day? They'll watch for a bit after school if the weather prevents them from going outside and they don't have a play date or an activity, then a bit after dinner. The biggest issue is that I'm often not home in the evening (I teach at night, or have PTA meetings or go to the gym) and my husband is awful at checking homework. So often I'll come home on days that I work in my office at 8:30 PM to find them all watching a hockey game with no homework done because it didn't occur to my husband to check. Maddening.

My boys (8 and 11) get an hour of video games on Thursday after school, they are allowed to play unlimited on Friday evening (unless we have other plans), and maybe an hour or two on Saturday evening if we are at home. They do get extra time on the iPod or ds if we are waiting at the doctors/dentist/orthodontists office, if they have to wait for me while I have a committee meeting or something like that. They also get an hour of tv time a day, if and when there is time for it at the end of the day. I'm not super strict about screen time, as long as homework is getting done and they are also doing other activities, such as playing outside, music, sports, reading etc.

I hear ya. It is so hard to find the right balance. My son is 10 and lives for video games. I hate to take them away completely since he enjoys them so much, but we have a 1 hour limit on school days. During the weekend or holidays, I don't care as much- as long as chores and reading are done and we have nothing else going on- I just cut it off when someone else wants the tv or if it is feeling excessive. My son's grades keep slipping though; when this happens we take away video games until he has 80% or higher on everything and no missing assignments- its funny how fast his grades will come up. He will suddenly have 100% on everything in efforts to get his beloved games back. But since he has yo-yo'd 3 or so times this year with that we decided there just needs to be a daily limit, hopefully it helps (we just put this into effect recently).
I try to keep in mind that video games are his "currency" so that is helpful to me; it is a good tool for getting schoolwork done, doing extra jobs to earn more video game time, etc.

All my kids would want to do is video games.

But I never did and never will buy them because it'd become a battle. I hear you! We have a TV and that is battle enough!!

I have a boy around that age who is obsessed with video games, too. But he can't play them at home. Now, if he goes to a friend's house or the library has a meet and greet event for kids with games, fine. But not in the house. He'd just veg for too many hours!

No great answers for you but it is much the same for us. My boys would play for hours if we let them! On the weekends we let them play in the am, much like our endless watching sat am cartoons when we were young plus it lets us sleep in a little. We do make them shut down by 11am.
On weekdays we limit it alot. If they get all of their homework done, extra reading, extra math practice etc, responsibilities etc and they have already been outside to play some (or if its too nasty and cold) I will relent and let them play for an hour or so. alot of weekdays they just dont have time and may only get 15 minutes of video game time. I feel like they should get SOME freetime to do what THEY want. However we do restrict them from playing video games as a discipline for rule infractions.

When my kids (girls) were growing up there were no video games allowed. They had educational games on a computer that was not hooked up to the internet. I didn't limit their time. Some days they would only play for 20 minutes, other days they would play for a few hours.

I think the most important thing is balance. Make sure homework is done, chores are done, and he spends some time playing and some family time.

I have been teaching parenting for yrs and yrs...TV and video time needs to be limited. Make sure physical excercise becomes more important than playing video games. Plus, getting a child outdrs in the fresh air is super important. The air where i live is cleaner than the indoor "pollution."
If he is 9, you need to have rules set before he becomes 13 ish...And this is the time to do this. Plus, school gets a tad more difficult as the yrs move on and hw rules should be established early on ---especially if he has a moody and intense temperament as mentioned above.

No more than an hr or two a day is plenty. And absolutely no violence on the games. If a child is shooting a person or blowing something up...it is wrong ! Be firm w/ what is acceptable and stand ground to no violence on these games.

I was just talking w/ a Mom of a 13 yr old boy. He is used to 4 hrs a day. Getting him to decrease his screen time is much more of a struggle at this age.

Keep in mind, unless they are actively moving their bodies...this screen time is sedentary time for kids...