Waking up at Night

It sounds like Separation Anxiety.
Instead of bringing him in to your bed (unless you are ok with this being a habit) sleep on his floor. After a few nights to a week he'll probably go back to being a good sleeper. He just needs to know you are there. SA means your baby literally is unsure if you will ever return!

If after a week that does not work, try Walk in/Walk Out. Get him calm, walk out, he'll scream, walk back in, get him calm, walk out, etc, etc. Usually this takes a few days too.

He WILL grow out of it.

Try peek a boo during the day, and talking to him from another room so he knows you are there even if he can't see you.

Good luck!

Almost all babies goes throught these stages- and more than once. My children had nine-month cycles. Babies understand a lot more than we give them credit for- they just are limited in the way they can express. I'm sure you can tell the difference between a distress cry and an angry cry. If you're okay with your son sleeping in bed with you (NOT the best thing for your marriage and intimacy, let alone YOUR sleep), let him. Otherwise, respond to his cries by going to him, calming him down for a few minutes, then replacing him in his crib. Yes, he'll cry and shreik, but he needs to know what is expected of him, too. Leave a playful night light on for him and check in on him every 15 minutes. It may take a while, but he'll get it. Babies need to be lovinly trained, or they will train you to do their bidding.

This seems to be such a universal problem, the majority of parents struggle with it! We had our little guy in bed with us a lot of the first year, primarily because it was easier for me to nurse that way - hee hee... We had to walk ours to sleep for bedtime and naps (he'd go back out after nursing during the night so that wasn't an issue at the time) and here's what we did at about 9 months: We were not interested in the 'cry it out' method at that age, we knew he wouldn't understand why we were ignoring him and he'd feel abandoned. So we sat on either side of the Pack'n'play he was going to be sleeping in and laid him down and he cried his head off. We sang and rubbed his back, head, legs, etc. We'd give him fifteen minutes, then one of us would pick him up for five, to let him calm down, then we'd put him back down again. That first night it took three pick-ups, then he fell asleep during the fourth lay-down (so about an hour). Same thing the next night, but on the third night it dropped down to three. A couple nights of that and it was down to two, with periods of calm during the 15 minute 'down' sections. Overall it took about two weeks to get down under 15 minutes of distress, then by the end of three weeks it had become a new habit and there was no crying at all. We really felt good about our compromise, yes he cried, but he wasn't crying alone. We like to think that while he was really mad we weren't doing what he wanted, he knew we were there for him and still loved him. It was hard, we certainly didn't look forward to bedtime for that first week, but as the situation steadily improved it got easier, and those three weeks seems like nothing compared to the hours of walking him over the previous months! I read the 'no cry sleep solution' and was profoundly affected by the description of what a crying baby left alone in the dark goes through. We figured there'd be some crying in his life, but our goal was not to abandon him to do it alone and it's worked so far!

We have the same thing, same age. Since we'd just got her a new crib, and she'd just been teething, and we'd just messed with her schedule via travel, we tried to treat the problem gently, basically doing what you do and bringing her into bed with us.

Slowly, I'm getting her back into her crib after she wakes up and she seems to be cutting down the wakeups. Experienced moms keep telling me that as soon as you get a baby into a nice pattern, they change, so I guess we should have enjoyed that full night's sleep while we had it.

I think getting the baby on a regular set of naps at a regular time will help also, and making sure he/she has eaten enough before going to bed.

Good luck!

E.,

Kids are extremely bright. You only need to bring them into bed with you one time for them to realize that it is much cozier than his own crib. The first time he was probably not feeling well and so you thought, okay but just this once I will bring him into bed with me. Now all he has to do is keep crying and he gets in. I know it is HARD to break!! But you need to stay consistent. Try it on a weekend or a week that you don't have a lot going on and just continue going into his room and laying him down and walk out without saying anything. After a while (sometimes a LONG while) he will catch on. But if you give in once...you are back to square 1. Just remember this too shall pass. I know with my third son he has always been an early riser and we did this around the same time. It is not easy to break...and it will break your heart. Just remember it is best for him in the long run and it is much harder on you than it is on them.

Good luck!!

H. Z (SAHM 5, almost 4 and 14 month old boys)

My daughter now a year old went through the same thing when she was this age. She would scream when I put her to bed and she woke up screaming in the middle of the night. I stayed consistent with her bedtime routine. I would close her door, she would cry, I would let her cry 1 -2 minutes, I would go back in lay her down (without talking and looking directly at her) and then leave again, she would then cry again... and I would start the process over. Within a week she was back to her normal going to bed routine. As for the middle of the night waking... I would feed her just before putting her to bed. This was her 'growth spurt' time. When she woke up, I would make sure that she wasn't wet or dirty... and start the night time routine over. This took a little longer to break. She is now a year old and is once again sleeping through the night.

My advice... stay consistent. I didn't do this routine with my son and he is now 4 years old and he still comes into my bed at night. My husband or I bring him back to his bed each night and each morning we still wake up with him in our room.

I have a 10 month old too. I think it may be his teething. He might just be feeling more sensitive then usually because his gums in soar. I am with you, I can't deal with the Ferber method. You should read "Sleeping thru the night"... the title is something like that. It helped us a lot, and you don't have to use the cry it out method.