Weaning My 14 Month Old

Updated on January 01, 2007
B.C. asks from Shakopee, MN
5 answers

I want to start weaning my son off breastfeeding, he is 14 months old and very strong willed. He is a big boy weighing 32 lbs and 32 inches (he was 11.1 at birth) eating all table food and likes whole milk from the sip cup. He sleeps with my husband and i at night he breastfeeds about 4 times a day usually 3 of those times so he can go to sleep. He has never been in a crib or playpen. Do I need to get him out of our bed to make the weaning easier? I don't like the idea of letting him cry when it can be helped by nursing him. I did go on LaLeche website, does this seem too early to wean? Any help would be great!

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So What Happened?

Thank you for the advice and wisdom. I am unsure right now why i am feeling like I want to wean my son. I do love the bonding time and do not mind at all him sleeping with us. I think my feelings with him are different than with my daughter only because I feel like i should be spending more time with my daughter than I am able to right now. After pondering about this for awhile i have decided just to go on as I am, after all they do indeed grow fast...I will reclaim my breasts when we are both ready! Thanks again for the great advice ladies!

More Answers

B.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I understand how you feel! My 15 month old still nurses, however he sleeps in his own bed so the night nursing has been done for quite some time now.

I guess the easiest way would be to be very gradual. Cut out one daytime nursing session, the least important one, like after a nap, before/after lunch, etc. Keep the most important ones, like first thing in the am and bedtime. Cut one out at a time and space them out, it will be the most comfortable for you and the baby.

I do'ntk now about the night weaning, since he is still in your bed it may be really hard. I'm sorry I don't have any advice for you there!

Congratulations on nursing this long, its a wonderful thing you did for your children!

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S.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

Congrats on bfing your kids so long. How wonderful for them and for you. Honestly, if you let your dd self wean, I would let your ds, as well. I bfed my first 2 for 9 mos and 12 mos, both self weaned. I bfed my last for 21 mos and I felt forced to wean her. She was having growth issues (opposite as your son! she is almost 4 yo and not as big as your ds yet!) and her ped and nutritionist encouraged me to wean her, saying the Bmilk was getting in the way of her eating/drinking other things, so she was not gaining weight. I feel I was forced to wean her when she was not ready (I wanted her to self wean, as the others did) and it was horrbily h*** o* both of us. She did not start gaining weight after weaning and I feel she would have self-weaned soon anyways, but it was not her choice, and I felt it wasnt mine. She is still tiny and the Bmilk was NOT in the way. They are only little for a short time, I wish we could get that time back.

As for sleeping with you, both my girls (3 1/2 and 5 yos) sleep with us on and off (still...). You need to decide which you want to get rid of, I would not do both at the same time, that will be very h*** o* him to lose 2 close times with mom at the same time. I would think about why you want to give up either one. I know how hard it is to not have your body. I went 4 1/2 years in a row with being pregnant or nursing. It was nice to have my body back when I was done, but I knew it was just a part of life, and it would eventually end.

Your kids are only small once and your ds just wants to have that closeness with you. Before you know it, he will be a rebellious teen and you will be lucky if you get 2 words out of him. (yes, I have one of those right now)

Good luck.
S.

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L.M.

answers from Milwaukee on

Hi, I know you've already decided to keep going with the status quo, but I just wanted to offer support that it's perfectly OK to continue to nurse and co-sleep. I know that sometimes we get the message from society that there's something wrong with a baby who's past 1 year but still nurses and sleep with mom. It's perfectly healthy and normal, though. In fact, the vast majority of babies worldwide nurse until they're at least 2 and sleep with their moms.

My DD will be 3 in Februrary and she still nurses quite frequently. She's also "strong willed" and I believe that nursing is very helpful to her. We're reading the book "Raising Your Spirited Child" and it's very informative. I also am nursing my 9 month old baby. We all sleep in a family bed.

When there are times when I wish everyone would wean, I remind myself that there would still be problems if they weaned. They would still pull and tug on me, still need me, still have "tantrums." I would just have one less way to comfort them. Not to mention they wouldn't be as healthy!!

((HUGS)) from another breastfeeding, co-sleeping mama!!

There will come a day when you will wonder how the time went so fast, and wish you could nurse your babies just one more time.

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R.S.

answers from Milwaukee on

B.,
i know we all get frustrated that with young children our body doesn't seem to be our own, so i really want to ask you why allowed your 1st child to wean when she was ready at 2 1/2, but want your second child to wean more than a year earlier. of course you can wean whenever you want to, but are you sure you're ready for your son to lose the immune benefits of breastmilk (meaning he may get sick more often, for longer duration)? and are you, in your quest to reclaim your breasts, really ready to give up the bonding time with your son nursing gives?

that said, i don't think you have to get him out of the bed, but you may need to replace your breast with something comforting (a lovey perhaps), and you will need to be very consistent.

best wishes,
ray

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A.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hello B.,
I had a similar situation with my daughter. She slept with my husband and I as well and would wake about 3x per night and the only way to get her back to sleep was by nursing. I was unable to wean her on my own. We ended up going on a long weekend when she was 17 months and luckily my mother-in-law took the fall for me. It was only tough the first night and after that she was fine. I was gone long enough to "dry-up" (4 days in Vegas) and was unable to really nurse her when I got home. I just told her no more milk when she would try to nurse and she pretty much got it. She still wants to touch my breast to fall asleep or comfort herself though (can't wait for that to pass!). Anyway, If you think you can manage it, I would highly recommend trying to get him to go back to sleep at night without nursing if at all possible-perhaps your husband could comfort him? Otherwise, my pediatrician suggested the long weekend method and although it was relatively abrupt, it worked!

Good luck!

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