What Is an Appropriate Punishment?

I have found that taking away T.V. time or another favorite pastime works. My daughter always listens when I asy no T.V. for a week for doing such & such.

Try rewarding him for telling the truth.
Catch him being honest and emphasize how much you appreciate and respect this behavior. Work out a chart for truthfulness and if he is honest for a week he gets 1 to 1 time with either parent or picks the meal. After a month he can get a small trinket or go out to a movie. If he lies then he should have to write out the conseqences while in time out. When I lie I get time out, I loose time with my friends.

Try to figure out what the purpose of the lie he tells. Is he trying to save face because he did something wrong? If that is the case emphasize that there was one bad thing that happened but know we have two had the truth been told we could fix what went wrong but now it will be harder because of the lie.

Is he trying to get something like attention or avoid something like homework. If he is avoiding homework he may be having a hard time with the lesson or the volume of work may be too much. After you figure out what the basic cause of his lies are you can work on the behavior that leads up to the lie and help him see how to prevent it.

I was taught to take away something that pertains to the lie. Make them tell the truth to whom ever they lied to or about. (sorry john, i liked to my mom about you for stealing that toy)
and if you dont have something that pertains to the lie, take away something that means alot ie: video games, television for a few days or an event like a friends birthday party. ---- that was one i used to get my son to stop stealing.

good luck

M.,
What I have done w/my kids is I first tell them 'If you tell me the truth, you won't get punished.' If they continue lying and then finally tell the truth, I tell them that they are being punished for the lying. For this I do the punishment 2 ways: If they are going to be in the corner for a short period of time (e.g. 15 minutes), I have them stand in the corner. If they are going to be in the corner for a long time (20+ minutes), I have them sit in the corner. No t.v. or movies for that entire night.
If the bad behavior continues, or they start displaying other bad behavior, I did this to my son when he was 6: I took ALL of his toys, stuffed animals, drawing utensils, and coloring books out of his room, and locked them away where he couldn't get to them. The only 'fun' things he had left in his room were books. I did this for 2 months. His grades and attitude improved greatly, so I put all of his fun stuff back in his room while he ____@____.com was so happy when he came home from school that day. He is now 17 and when I suspect he's lying to me, I just give him a look (the one that says 'You don't expect me to buy that') and if he wasn't, he starts blurting the truth out.

hi M., My name is B. mom of 3 children 12yrold boy 10yrold boy and my 3yrold girl. This has happened to me and I found that one punishment that has worked is taking away items/tv time away from them. If he lies and you know about it remove something away from him. Example...if he is getting ready to play with something tell him he has to give it to you for the lie. He can get it back in a day or two depending on the lie. If he does it again then take TV/game time away. Doing this over and over again will make he realize when you lie you will pay for it. of course when he tells the truth you must give him is items back and the TV/game time to show the truth is the best way to go *WINK* Good luck....kindly B.

There's got to be a reason why he's lying. Maybe you've already tried this, but instead of just punishing him and teaching him that's it wrong try to get him to talk about it. There might be an ungerlying reason for it. It may be his way of getting you and your Husbands attention. He's at a tough age and with a much younger sis. Do you guys get to spend any quality time together (yeah, what's that right?) just with him alone?

First you need to master the power of the "MOMMY TONGUE TRICK". You take a mirror and have your children stick their tongue out and show them their "bumps" on the back of their tongue. Then you tell them "Did you know when you tell a lie that mommy knows by your tongue? It will change the bumps to colors." Then when you "wonder" if they are telling a lie....you say, "Let me see your tongue."....trust me...if it hangs below their chin, they are not lying...if it barely comes out of their mouth....it's a lie. You then afix the punishment such as writing 50 times "I will not lie"....or give them a chore to do...or take away a fun thing for the day. After about a week of this...your son and daughter will no longer lie because they will always be caught. Right now it's a 50/50 chance for them , thus they will lie. nip it in the bud with the Tongue Trick. Works wonderfully!!!! Funny thing is, after awhile they will start to say "I'm not lying! See my tongue? And hang it out of their mouth." LOL. It's a bit embarassing in public...but it works. By the way...it worked on one of my children till she was almost 11 years old before she "figured it out". LOL

I have learned to take things away from my daughter first I say this is my last warning if you want to or don't stop ______ than you will not either play a game or go outside, what ever the case may be. This works because it is giving them the option of having two choices either they are going to listen and not do it or they have chosen to have what they want or do most taken away.

M.,

I know just how you feel. My step daughter started lying to us about the same age maybe even six she is now nine and no matter what punishment we have given her she continues to do it. so please let me know what you do and how you make out because it drives me crazy that she lies.

Good Luck!
A.