When and How Announce Our Moving Plan to the Kids

Um...maybe I should have read all the responses and this would have been asked already but since it's affecting your daughter too, I'm kinda wondering why she wasn't involved in the decision in the first place??

I would NEVER move my kids without some kind of warning first...a "hey we like this house here..." or "...Dad found a job and we're thinking about moving out of town to here..." Something that gives her a warning or at least preparation.

I can tell you from experience that it won't matter where you tell her it will have the same outcome. And that is...thanks mom and dad for considering my feelings...

I say this because I made a life altering decision without so much as a hey how do you feel about it with my daughter and she was 14 at the time. We made the announcement at a very nice restaurant she'd always wanted to go to. And it still didn't keep her from screaming...HOW COULD YOU? in the middle of it and hiding crying in the bathroom for 20 minutes until I could get her best friend to come and get her out...

Lesson learned.

14 is a HARD HARD age for girls...but for any kid they want to know that their feelings are valid...and that they are a part of the family dynamic too.

Good luck to you.

Over a meal sounds great. And yes tell them as soon as possible and when everyone is in an okay mood. Let them in on most things concerning the process, not only will they feel like they have input, but they can learn alot about buying a house. We will be moving within a month and a half and have been looking for a house since the beginning of the year, and our kids (9 and 10) have been able to look at every house with us, are aware of all school changes, have an idea of the expense, and know how much work is invoved.

My kids will be 11 next week. We have told them there is a chance we may move sometime in the next 6 months. They do know about it. They complain about it. But we have also explained why. That is a key issue at this age. Also, when the time does come, let her be involved. Obviously, she is not going to pick the place but let her express her feelings about it. She may surprise you. Open and honest.

PLAN !!!!!!

Research the area big time. Find places in the general area that each child would like to go to then expand your search to the state.Find activities in your new area the kids can join. Not knowing is what scares kids so try to make it an adventure. Find every positive you can and figure out how to sell it. Allow them a facebook page or email, that you have a password for, so they know they can still contact their friends. Think of how this benefits all family members and how it hurts/angers/scares all family members so when you sit down to tell them you and your hubby are fully prepared. At 14 I'm sure she knows we are a struggling economy and some move you simply cant help. Make sure you dont get angry, even if she does, give her time to think and be as patient and understanding as you can. Keep the communication open and give her thoughts and feelings credit. She has every right to feel scared and angry even if you dont like it.

Good luck with your kids and the move!

At dinnertime when everyone is at the table bring it up and tell them the reason. Daddy got a new job, we are movign closer to Grandma, whatever.
Let your daugher investigate houses. Let her go to Realtor.com and to the city's website of where you are moving to and have her help find a house.
My girls know the price range and what we are looking for so they have been on the computer for a month now trying to find our new home. THey are 12 and 14.

It will be hard on your 14 year old, but involve her. We are a military family and have moved many times. My daughter's 2 best friends moved last year and we are moving again this year. It's going to be hard.
YOur daughter might hate you for a while. When she starts getting involved with her new friends and in the new school you will be back in her good graces.
MOving is an exciting time if you make it so for the older ones. If you have little ones let them know you are moving and tell them after a certain time, after is schooli out, after Johnny's birthday.

well, i think it would be best to tell them sooner rather than later. u can start off with the big announcement but before they can protest tell them a bit about the area and make sure u ask their opinions and concerns. look into activities for their age group, local malls and theaters and such and make sure u use those places for family outings once u get there. they dont have to agree but if they feel involved (getting to picjk the paint in their bedrooms, a going away party) they will be less likely to stay angry. pulling a 14 yr old from her environment is esp harsh but encourage her to stay in touch with her friends. make her feel like she has some control over some things, except for the inevitable fact that u guys are moving.

Well, remember that if YOU act nervous, you're automatically going to make her be really nervous about it. Instead, come about it in a way that is exciting.