When Did Your Kids Stop Believing?

Updated on April 02, 2013
L.M. asks from Chicago, IL
20 answers

My daughter is 7 and asking all the detailed questions about how Santa, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy work. She's thinking quite deeply about it and so far I've been able to come up with *plausible* explanations. I think she's going to trip me up soon....or just realize that it's not adding up.

I'm wondering how old your kids were when they figured it all out and how did it happen? Did they ruin it for the younger ones? She has a brother who is 4 and I suspect she'd love to let him in on the secret, when she figures it out.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

My kids are 6 and 10.
They still believe, in everything.
;)

My daughter's Teacher, when kids ask her if it is real or not, her response is:
"Well Santa comes to my house..." and she leaves it at that.

2 moms found this helpful

J.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

my daughter is 6 but in 1st grade. kids already told her they dont believe and their parents do the christmas shopping she told them
i get more present because santa AND my parents get M. presents. then she argued with them on the playground
she definitely believes
the easter bunny got her magic jelly beans that she planted and watered which will grow into lolli[ops slowly over the next 4 days. i'm living it up while i still can! anything to continue the magic because i know its going to end soon=(

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

C.W.

answers from Lynchburg on

hmmm-

Ya mean ALL the easter baskets I made are for NOTHING!

LOL

Here...we 'deal' in the 'spirit' of the event.

And with SO MANY kiddos close in age...the kiddos have 'preserved' the image for the youngers.

Now that ALL kiddos are older...we still 'keep up a front'.

Perhaps it is the child in ME that perpetuates the 'myths'...but...I like them...

Not sure this helped...

Best Luck!
michele/cat

3 moms found this helpful

C.M.

answers from Washington DC on

we have always told our kids the truth. We decided not to lie to them about all of that stuff. They know not to tell their friends though

2 moms found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

All of them made it through 4th grade, surprisingly. No, I told them not to tell anyone else, and they didn't.

2 moms found this helpful
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C.W.

answers from Santa Barbara on

19 years old...let's just continue the fun!!

2 moms found this helpful
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M.B.

answers from Austin on

At some point she is going to figure it out....

I like what my friend said to her older kids about Santa....

"Now that understand about Santa Claus, etc..... if you SPOIL it for the little ones, I'll make sure that YOU don't get things from Santa!"

1 mom found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

It amazes me that they don't take notice that the Easter baskets in the store are the same baskets the Easter Bunny leaves for them.

My 7 year old is thrilled with all the clothes, pencils, and sandals the Easter Bunny left for her in her basket.

She didn't mention a word that there was no candy.

1 mom found this helpful
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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Keep it going!!!
Sometimes they start to inquire but then still want to believe.
By age 10 they can put two & two together.
Still keep it going esp w/little ones in the house.
Give them all the answers to their questions so they'll still believe. Let it
go on as long as possible.
It's one of the last times they will believe in the magic of something.

1 mom found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

9 year old started right before Christmas. I think she was getting flack for saying Santa was bringing her XXX or XXX. So she knows but still wants stuff.

The younger one still believes.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.P.

answers from Philadelphia on

Last summer when my son was 9, he told me he knew that the Easter bunny and the tooth fairy did not exist. "Now what about Santa?", he asked. I told him we would talk about it at Christmas! My son's questions about Santa over the last few years had become increasingly complex. He would be turning 10 in the fall, and I began preparing to tell him the truth. Sure enough, a few days after Thanksgiving, my son told me he didn't want to sit on Santa's lap because he knew Santa wasn't real. I was relieved to hear that he had discovered the truth on his own, and I launched into a discussion I had been researching and planning for several months. We talked about the real St. Nick, faith and love, and we read the famous letter from a little girl named Virginia. My son totally flipped out, and ran to his room yelling "stop it - I don't want to hear any more!". Apparently, even though logic told him that there is no man in a red suit who delivers toys to all the children of the world in one night, he was desperately hoping I would prove him wrong. I felt terrible - he didn't want to see The Polar Express with me and he wouldn't help bake cookies(since we didn't need to leave any for Santa). My son's best friend still believed, and part of me wished I had tried to keep the magic alive. My son did not reveal what I told him to his best friend or to any other kids who still believed. Now that it's almost April, I realize I am glad that my son knows the truth now. My husband and I had fun playing Santa for so many years, and I hope my son will have fun sharing the magic with his kids one day. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

E.C.

answers from Dallas on

at 5.5 my daughter TOLD ME the Easter bunny was not real and it was a man in a suit and for me to stop lying and pretending... so i stopped baskets and egg hiding etc then. I just get her a nice gift for Easter instead and we focus on the real reason for Easter.

Tooth fairy we never paid too much attention about and its more habit stick tooth under pillow get money really no hype or talk about a fairy.

Santa this year kids were talking in her 4th grade class (she is 9.5) and so she kinda questioned and i let her know before Christmas. We never really hyped up Santa but IMO she is old enough to not worry about that and focus more on what the Season is really about

1 mom found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

My answer to those questions was always another question, "What do you think?" and that worked until the day my older son said, "Just tell me."

This past Christmas, at 10 and 12, was the first time they knew for sure.

My 12 year old lost a molar and tried to say that the "tooth fairy" owed him $5 for it. I handed him a dollar.

For Easter, they tried to make me wear a bunny suit. Heh.

1 mom found this helpful

M.B.

answers from Tampa on

My son is 6 and still believes :) hopefully even long after he doesn't be will help continue the magic for his baby sister. BTW I HATE when people say it's lying to kids to let them beleive in something so innocent!

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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son is almost 6 and he figured it out. We never made a big deal out of any of it, but he did believe in Santa this Christmas. However, a few weeks ago he said out of the blue one day "I don't think Santa is real. He's just a guy in a red suit."

then, about two weeks ago, we were reading a book where a boy loses a tooth and one of his friends says the tooth fairy isn't real. So, my son said "mom, don't lie, is the tooth fairy real or is it you?" I asked what he thought, and he said "there can't really be a fairy flying around collecting teeth." So I told him the truth.

I never felt strongly compelled to keep the myth going, so when he figured it out, I was happy to tell him the truth.

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M.C.

answers from Chicago on

My 6 year old son believes in Santa, the toothfairy and the Sandman (yes, the sandman!); however, he is questioning if the Easter Bunny is real. He sees bunny rabbits in our backyard all the time and just doesn't think they are capable of bringing eggs and baskets into the house. I just asked him who would have filled his easter basket this year and left it at that. I think he is teetering.

D.S.

answers from Columbus on

My oldest is 8 and I believe he still doesn’t know. He asks a lot of questions about Santa and Easter bunny, but based on the questions, I don’t think he really know they’re not real.
When he starts asking or saying things that make me believe he’s aware, I will talk to him and will ask him to not tell his little brother and maybe even have him help me.

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A.C.

answers from Dallas on

My 6 year old: I suspect he's suspected the Santa thing for a year or more. When he asks me questions, I say "Well the story goes that..." and go that direction. We play Santa, he gets the pictures done every year, etc. But Santa is such a small part of what we celebrate that he's like a friendly uncle who give candy canes and visits, but he's not "the holiday". Same thing with the Easter Bunny, etc. Our holidays are more on the family and religious traditions, light on the extra stuff, though they're still there and enjoyed.

Last summer, age 5, we went to Disney World and he had the time of his life. He saw Hook and Smee at a party, Peter Pan surprised us, it was grand, it was magical. But 3 months ago he was thoughtful one day and I asked what was up. He said "Mom, those characters at Disney by the castle.....are they REAL or just people in costumes?" I asked why he was asking, and he said he was just thinking about it, so I said "Well....little mice make me shudder. I think I'd freak out if I saw a REAL mouse 6 ft tall". He just smiled, and I said "But it sure was fun to pretend wasn't it?! Please let your little brother have fun and still believe whatever he wants--you're a big guy, so you need to help him have fun and not ruin it for him ok?" He promised not to and hasn't.

As for Easter this year, he was in my room and saw a gift that I'd bought for Easter. I was like "augh, get out!". Then I tried to buy something else, and he saw that too (I've been very unorganized the last 2 months so things haven't been properly hidden) and I was agitated. Then I didn't want him feeling bad, so I said "Hey, come here.....the reason I was agitated was that I was trying to surprise you with things for your Easter basket and you're so smart that you've made it hard to surprise you". He said "My Easter Basket? So....there's not really a 6 ft rabbit either?" I was shocked, but he smiled and was ok with it. We had a little laugh and I said "It's just fun to play that for the kids.....do you want to help and be the Bunny Helper this year?" He said sure, and I said the most important thing to being a Helper is to keep it secret.

Then I took him to the store, just the 2 of us, to see the candies that we never walk past with the kids present (lol) and explained what the different candies were and let him choose 3 kinds of candies for the baskets and surprises. He felt very big. Then I let him help me choose some of little brother's gifts. (He still got surprised because I still bought things for him too). He was happy to keep it secret because he has an important job: the Bunny Helper. Today after we got the baskets done (kites, sunglasses, playdoh, sidewalk chalk, darth vadars with bunny ears, angry birds game, etc, etc) and we did the egg hunt with candies, Joseph waited for little brother to leave the room and then quietly smiled and said "Thank you mom, thank you dad" and hugged us for his gifts. That was sweet. Not only was he able to be thankful and show gratitude for his gifts (to real people, not invisible animals), but he was able to wait until little brother was gone, because it's a secret only for big boys to know.

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A.R.

answers from Houston on

I've been thinking about this also lately. My daughter is 8 and last year before Christmas she was asking if Santa is real. At the time (since I felt like 7 was still kinda young and she also has some younger kids around her) I just told her that I think he's real and what she thought and she said, "yes, i think he's real). While she was at her dad's last year for Christmas, I found this really sweet letter on Cozi's website. I think you can google "Cozi Santa Letter" and it should come up. I swear it almost made me cry. :)

She hasn't asked this question again but if she does I plan on giving her this letter. I know the time is coming and while it makes me sad, I also don't want her to start being made fun of cause she thinks they are real. I think I found out when I was 8 or 9 and I remember feeling like a "big kid" cause I knew something that my younger brother didn't! And my parents let me help out with "Santa."

Good luck!

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B.M.

answers from Chicago on

My boys were 11 and 9 years old; and the only reason that I told them, because they were being very selfish one Christmas. I was buying their Christmas presents in the store and they asked me who was I buying for. I told them it's Daddy's present. My 9 year old went on complaining how selfish I was for only buying presents for dad or myself. So I told him the truth and made them feel really bad. Magic is one thing, but when they are getting older and asking for expensive presents, which we spent at least $500 per kid, it was time to tell them the real meaning of Christmas. Christmas is about giving not about getting things.

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