When to Give up the Binky??

I just waited until my kids could understand the concept of something being all gone. Once they could understand that then all the bottles and pacifiers were thrown in the bottom of the garbage. When they asked for their pacifier I'd ask, "Where did you leave it?" Together we'd look everywhere and then they'd decide that the pacifier must be all gone.

I let me son have it until one day, when he was 2 and change, but not 2 and a half yet because it was before my daughter was born (I wanted him off of it before the baby came), he told me it was broken. It actually was, the pacie had broken away from the plastic on one side. I told him that he was right and so now the pacie was all done, he's a big boy now, and that if he went without it for three days (cause I heard that it would take three days to get over it) I'd buy him the kitchen he'd been asking for. So anytime he asked for it I reminded him about the kitchen (insert any gift of his choice btw) and it actually worked! So my suggestion is... let him have it for the trip, it's a comfort and the trip is going to be a crazy experience for him already. Get him off of it once you guys are back home, tell him about the pacie fairy or whatever you decide to do. He's not SO old to still have it as a comfort. That's just my experience and opinion. Good luck though in whatever you do decide! :)

Hi. I saw you post about the binky. My son is now 7 he was a was a binky guy. My 2 daughters are thumb suckers (which to me is worse because you can't take them away). He gave up his binky around 3ish. The dentist had told me not to take it away that eventually he would give it up. He did pretty much give it up on his own. I think we gave it to Santa for Christmas. The dentist said he could fix his teeth not his mind. That made me much more calm about him using it. At that point it was just at night also. They said you when is the last time you saw a college kid with a passy? Don't worry about it. Best of luck

Hi J.
My name is T. and I am 35 yrs old mother of three. My suggestion is to wait until you get back from Florida. 1. the binky will help with the ear popping on the plane ride. 2. Disney can be fun, a little intimidating for a 2yr old and very tiring. He may need some familiar comfort other than mom and dad in such a busy place. However when you get back form Florida create a special calender with him and decide on the date the "binky fairy" will come or decide on when he will put the binky in the garbage his self. The difference is this. When he puts the binky in the garbage his self it is a decision that he is making and you are supporting, that way once he gets rid of it you can remind him of the significance of getting rid of it (like becoming a big boy)After creating the calender talk to him every day about doing the important day coming up. Make it a positive thing to look forward to, he going to be a big boy at 2yrs old and get him something to mark becoming a big boy. Remember make everyday after creating the calender a joyful expectation of loosing the binky because, after all it is a "lost" for them.

I hope this will help.

T.

I have had four kids, two of which were pacifier kids. My daughter and son were both 3 when they gave them up. I am a believer that it is not a social taboo to have a pacifier. It calms them down and satisfies them. Would it be better for them to start sucking on their fingers because that is more accepted? Or walking around with a blanket in their mouth? I had my kids start being a part of the decision to put the pacifier away. I also talked with them about the times we could use it and the times we would put it away for awhile. When they took part in the process they felt more at ease about it being away. We started increasing the lengths of time it was away until they didn't need it at all. With my daughter I told her when the new baby came along it would be time for her to put the pacifier away for good. So by setting a time frame that we worked together on seemed to help her put it away longer and longer each day. We "practiced" being with out it so that when she finally gave it up she would be ok. With my son it was a little harder. He had several stashed around the house so I had to find his hiding spots. With him I told him when the last one was gone we would not buy any more and this helped him try to work on getting rid of it before he lost the last one. As far as the plane ride you might want to take it. Sucking on the pacifier will help him with relieving the pressure in his ears from being on the plane. I hope this helped a little or gave you something to think about.

I would keep it around for the plane ride - the change in pressure can wreak havoc on baby ears, and if they are sucking or chewing on something, it's better for the ears. Maybe you could tell him that after we come home from vacation the binky fairy will come and take it away. Plus, I would have it around for the vacation simply because it will be comforting to have a familiar and soothing object for him in the face of all the changes. Don't stress out too much about the binky, my daughter used to love hers, too, but she gave 'em up with out much fuss when she (and I) were ready. They don't go off to college with a binky;)

Hi J.,
My 4.5 year old daughter used a binky until she was almost 3.5. We had tried several times, but kept giving in because we needed a good nights sleep. I recommend you wait until after getting back from FL. Too much change may drive both of you insane. The way we got her off was to snip a very small opening in the center of the binky so she didn't get that suction from the binky. She thought it was broken and decided she didn't want a broken one. We told her that they were all broken at the store. She still holds it from time to time just for security but that's it. Good luck!

Hi,
Your 2 year-old may still be too young, give it time, he will be better able to cope in another year. My daughter used her binky until she was 3. We actually stopped use while at Disney. We talked about it ahead of time and when it was time to go on the trip, she packed up all of her binkies, put them in a shoebox and we brought them to the front desk at the hotel at Disney World. She explained that she was donating them to babies who didn't have any binkies while they were on vacation. The lady at the front desk played right along and thanked my daughter personally for being so kind. She is 7 now and has forgotten all about them.

I took the binky away from my son at 2 yrs old. For the months to a year leading up to 2 yrs old - he only got the binky when he slept (or in emergency situations). One night he fell asleep without the binky and I seized the opportunity to take it away from him. He continued to ask for it for the next few days and I told him we didn't have anymore and that binkies were only for babies and he is a big boy now. Eventually he accepted and stopped asking. It really wasn't that bad. In your circumstance - I would wait until you come back from Disney because you may need it - especially on the plane. Maybe you can say that you left the binky in Disney with Mickey and he will accept that.

Good Luck!

J.,
My boys had binkys that I wanted to get rid of before their first bday. But it kept getting put off. I thought I should get rid of bottles first (that went really well). There was always something I thought I should get through before getting rid of the binky. Finally when they were close to turning 2 (probably the same age as your child I had enough of it. I had only allowed it at this point for bedtime and afternoon nap. I wanted to get rid of it before getting them into a bed so I talked about the binky fairy with them for a couple of days and did it. It went much smoother than I thought it would. My boys are very caring and liked the idea that it would go to another baby that needed it. Don't get me wrong...a couple days were a little tough, but we were settled within a week. My advice would be go for it....now. You will find reasons to put it off, b/c you know how much he likes and depends on it, but it might get harder the longer you wait. He will be so excited at Disney. There should be plenty of things for him to see to keep his mind off of the Binky. Best of luck. Have fun at Disney. We just got back from our first trip with 3 year old boys!
C.

Hi J.,

I say do youselves a favor and wait until you get back from Fla. I have a 6 year old daughter who kept the binki until she was almost 3, which I feel is a bit too long, now that I have another child. But, my son just turned 2 and I am in the same boat. He still takes the binki at night, which to me is a crutch as well, I figure if he has it he'll go down much easier than he would without it. So, you are not alone.

But, to answer your question, I would let him keep it until you return home, as it will help with his ears big time while on the plane and while you have him strapped in a stroller all day at the parks. We just went to Disney this past October and the binky so came in handy. There are going to be shows you will want to see and he may not want to sit still during them or while he is out of the stroller in line with you as you have to park them and carry / hold the baby.

I am sure you will get many many opinions on this matter, but just wanted to give you my recent experience.

Enjoy your trip!! We have been back now 4 months and I am ready to plan the next trip back, it was a blast!!

I had both my boys give up the binky at two yrs old. My first ws obsessed with the sanitation men so we gave it to them. The second had a cold and everyime I cleaned the binky some water got in the nipple. He really disliked that and told me he didn't want it. I seized the opportunity and took them all away (threw them out to avoid MY tempation). Even with a bad cold, he only asked for it for a day or two and that was that.
I would wait however until after your trip.

Good luck!

Hi J.,

When my daughter was around that age, she wanted her binky for the same reasons, I let her have it when it was bed time but tried to slowly wean her from it during the day. By the time she turned two SHE decided she didn't want it anymore and threw it in the garbage. It was a rough couple of sleepness nights because she cried not knowing what to do without her binky and when I offered it to her, he screamed, "NO".

My suggestion is not to take away the binky before your trip, but try weaning him more throughout the day. Who knows by the time you go, he may decide on his own that he doesn't want it anymore.

Good luck!

How about getting your son used to the idea of giving the binky to Micky Mouse when you go to Florida? Start talking to your son now about Micky (or his favorite character) and tell him Micky would love to have it or say whatever you think will move your son. Start slow and maybe say Micky needs to give it to kids that don't have binkys etc. You get the idea.

Get your son excited about the idea of taking his binky to Disney and let your son choose when to give it to Micky. You can get a special case for the binky hand off or make a special card, etc. Just make a big deal out of it in whatever way you think will get your son on board with the idea.

It will take a little work to figure things out but I am sure it will be worth it in the end. I bet that the characters will even take the thing from your son with a little talk in advance. I have found with kids, and my husband :-), that getting them to think it is their idea is the best way to bring them around. Good luck.

I have a similar problem--my son is 20 months old and, although he only gets the binky at bedtime and naptime, I dread the day that we have to get rid of it. Some people have told me that I shouldn't worry; that he won't take it to kindergarten with him! But most others who have been through this told me to get rid of it cold turkey, like you said, and expect to endure a week or so of misery while he gets used to not having it. They assure me that it only takes a week (or less) and then it's like they never had it in the first place!

Having said that, I haven't yet had the guts to do it...I value my sleep at night too much, and he's still young now. My goal is not having the binky by 2, as well. Good luck!

Keep in mind that you want your baby to suck on something during take off and when plane lands so his ears don't pop.
My daughter used her's only at night until age 3.. I took her to the dentist and he told her that her teeth were going forward.. We bought a box on the way home and deposited all passies in it. Three nights of asking why she could not have her passies ...telling her the dentist said so.. the problem was ended.

Hi J.,
You should try to get rid of the binky as soon as possible. My son sees a speech therapist and the two items I had to get rid of right away was the "ninny" and the bottle. I had my son stop cold turkey at 20 months. It was a little difficult at night, but he got over it. I noticed he started talking more. I was told by the speech therapist that pacificers and bottles hinder speech because they push the tongue downwards, which makes the pronunciation of the letters l, t, d, s, etc. difficult.
The longer you wait, the harder it will be to get him to stop.
Good Luck.

I'd wait till after your trip. Not because it would make the trip easier, but because in a few months he'll be just that much older to be able to deal with it better. I took them away at 2.

A.

Not only for his peace of mind while you are in strange and unfamiliar places, but also for your's...let him have the binky on vacation. If you don't you will go home more exhausted than ever and really needing a vacation. Why such a big rush anyway? It is comforting to him at time's when you can't comfort him. Maybe you could look at it as a support tool rather than a crutch. If you feel the need to ween him from it sooner, perhaps make it a process with a number a steps. This might allow him to be involved in the process. We slowly restricted my son's binky use. After months of only having his binky at night, my son was willing to throw his binky in the garbage himself. He was almost three when this happened, so it did not happen over night. Don't stress over this too much. He'll grow up to happy and healthy regardles of how you choose to handle this!

I would just wait until after your trip. That's a lot of stuff going on for your little guy. Our son used a binky until he was 3.5. We got him excited about giving his binky to Santa, so we put it in a big box, wrapped it and put a note on top for Santa. The next morning, he came downstairs and went to look for the box and it was gone! In its stead was another bigger box with a note from Santa. We had gotten him the Cars character pillow. The note said thank you for giving his binky to other children in the world who need it. And that he would always remember such a special little boy. This was just this past Christmas. I was so scared and in a way, I didn't want to let it go because he would be growing up and I want my little baby boy back sometimes. He had fun and hasn't missed it ever since. Try to do it together, maybe the Easter Bunny, you can put it in a basket for the easter bunny. Then the next day there could be something really special for him (something he can use to go to sleep with). Maybe you can try that and of course it would be before your trip. If it's too hard for him emotionally just wait until you come back. He won't be with it forever so don't stress over it too much...it's really ok. Our dentist said he would give it up when he's ready and that was true.

My daughter is also addicted to her paci & i am struggling with the same thing--I am going to use the SuperNanny Paci-Fairy idea and leave her a gift in the mail for her in return. I am very hesitant to go cold turkey so I am first going to limit the use to naps and bedtime...then the Paci-Fairy will come into play...BUT I would most certainly wait until your return to deal with this. Everything that goes into a vaca--the prep, flying or a long car ride, new people, hotels, etc. can be a lot for a little one...why not wait--give him his comfort in an unfamiliar place. esp. in the plane--let him have it for take off and landing for his ears....Good luck and enjoy a great vaca!!!

My DD is 2 1/2 and still uses her binky a ton. I try to limit it to bed, but it is hard, she asks for it a lot. She has a stuffed bunny too and needs them both. I have tried cold turkey, but caved in and gave it back to her.
She sleeps so well that I hate to take it away. However she has a terrible overbite, but the dentist says it will correct itself within a couple of months when she gives the binky up. As far as the trip, it will be hard enough with a toddler, I wouldn't get rid of it before you go. Just my personal opioion though! Good Luck!

C.
Mommy to Jessie, Katie and Julia
www.timetochangethediapers.com
Adorable, affordable cloth diapers and reusable items for babies, kids and Moms!

I have to agree with the others. Wait till after your trip. The binky will help on the plane ride. Both him and the other passengers on the plane! haha

Both my boys used binkys. When they turned 1 year old I decided that was enough. Their binkys had to go as well as their bottles. I got tired of searching for them all the time because they would just drop them anywhere in the house or throw them behind their cribs. One day their binky's "mysteriously" disappeared! They fussed and cried for them for a few days but finally got over it.

J.,
My daughter is 2 1/2 and I was so afraid it would be the most tramatic thing for her. When she turned 2 we just told her that she is a big girl now and the pacifer is for babies. We threw them all out so we were not tempted and when she would ask for it we just kept repeating that your a big girl now which she was excited by.

It was really very easy. I made a big deal over nothing and really underestimated her.

Good luck.
If you want to wait till after your trip I don't think it matters but I would let him have it whenever he wants it so as not to confuse him. Then when they are gone they're gone for good.

Hi! good luck trying to get rid of the binky! My son is almost 4 and still uses it to sleep. I know, I know, I should take it away from him, but I just haven't done it yet. anyway, I definitely dont think you should take it away before your Florida trip. that's a whole new experience for him and he will be out of sorts not being home and in his routine. but definitely once you're home and back in the swing of your routine, the binky fairy is a great way to go!! good luck!!!

Well, i'm not sure on the timing of when to give up the binky - perhaps it is just a personal choice of the parents.

However, I might have some advice on how to help your child give it up. My friend was trying to get her daughter off bottles as she was getting older and their Nanny had a great and succussful way of doing it. They gave the child a goal and told her "OK, you are getting older now, so you don't need to drink from a bottle anymore. In 1 week, we are going to stop using the bottle, and until then, you can use the bottle as much as you want" and so my friend's daughter did. She sucked on that botttle all week and then at the end of the week the Nanny said it was time to take the bottle away, she was a big girl now. And that was it. My friend had no other problems with her daughter wanting a bottle.
Don't know if it will work for everyone, but it's worth a shot. I think it gives the child a chance to adjust to the thought that "this is it", rather than just taking it away cold turkey.
good luck.

Hi J.,

I had the same issue with my daughter. I tried at 2 1/2 to have her give her binkys to Santa for the new babies. She was perfectly willing, but when it came time to go to bed that night it was a disaster. Thank goodness I saved one. Then I tried a piece of advice from a friend of mine. I took each binky (including the ones at Nana's house) and cut a hole in the tip. This eliminates the suction. When my daughter said it was broken, I explained to her that binkys aren't meant for children once they get their beautiful teeth. She accepted that and continued for a little while to use the binkys. Every couple of days I cut a little more off of the tip. They were just not enjoyable without the suction and she eventually lost interest and asked me to go ahead and send them back to the binky factory for the new babies.

This turned out to be a much better solution and much less traumatic than just taking them away. Let me know if you try it, and the best of luck.

That's his security blanket why get rid of it. He will grow out of it. He is only a little boy he is not an adult.

My daughter did everything with the binky in her mouth, but when she got to chewing everything they became a hazard. Chunks of the binky can break off and become a choking hazard. I told her that because she was becoming a big girl that we had to send the binky to babies who really needed it and I got her a special treat for giving it up. She asked for it a few times, but gave it up fairly easily. I find if I talk to her more like an adult rather than saying "Because I said so" that she is very reasonable. Good luck!

S.

I think you should let him go cold turkey..if it bothers u that much, but u can't be soft. He will probably not even remember the blanket by the time April comes...promise

All three of my children had a pacifier. Thr doctor said it is easier to get rid of a pacifier then a thumb.
Yes it is heart breaking to see a child upset or crying but if it benefits the child then it is a positive step.You may encounter a few nights of crying or no sleeping but usually after five days they go on without it.You are the one who has to have patience. I have done this with my own children and grandchildren.
Try to put it in your heart that it is a good thing you are doing.

Go with the flow. My two year old still has it for those times and I am not getting rid of it until Easter because we have a trip away from him. If you are flying the binky might help him to suck on the plane so his ears don't pop and the other flyers will thank you for that. I say just wait til after your trip hey ya never know he might just give them up himself on the trip.
I hope this helps
L.

i realize that the majority of doctors/dentists will balk at my approach, but i quickly found out the pacifier was a source of comfort for my daughter and her doctor suggested i get rid of her bottle, pacifier, "woobie", and toilet train at the same time. I decided against it, I felt too much of her security will be taken away, so she kept her pacifier and woobie all the way thru potty training. i weaned her from the pacifier by only offering it to her when she goes to sleep. she insisted having it near her during the day, so i bought her a little purse to carry it in during the day and every so often, she would open it to make sure it was there, but wouldn't use it. One day, she was so tired, she fell asleep with out it and i seized the opportunity to get rid of it and it worked. so, she really stopped when she was close to 3 years old and fully potty trained without any issues. she is now 4 and still has her woobie, which is fine. i'm using the same method. she cannot takeit to school, but at home she can do as she pleases and it is great.

Another method i used was to tell her "i don't understand you" when she would try to speak with it in her mouth. Sometimes she got so frustrated that she threw it across the room with aggravation, so i knew it was a matter of time before she gave up on a pacifier herself.

Bottom line, i didn't want to take away her security items (whatever they were) during stressful developmental stages and I believe that is why transition to her own room/bed; potty training; separation anxiety; preschool are going so well.

I don't get the whole binky concept. To me, its a cop out for parents who don't want to deal with their childrens' emotions. They would rather just stuff this rubber piece of junk in their mouth so they don't have to deal with the crying or find out why they are upset to begin with! If they can walk, they shouldn't have one of these hanging out of their mouth.
No sympathy from me. Just throw it out. He'll deal with it.

I have 3 children, all who used binky's. The best advice I can give is to get rid of it and go cold turkey, it may take a couple days but he won't miss it after then. Trust me it is probally harder on you than it will be on him.

Good luck!

Your son will be cranky for a few days with "binky withdrawl. After those tough few days, he will learn new mechanisms for soothing himself. Hang in there.

i am a mom of a three year old boy and a 16 month old girl, both of my choldren have/had binkys i wanted to take my sons away but when the baby came along and had one he looked for his also, i got rid of his by only giving it to him when he was going to sleep/nap. he would ask for it during the day and i told him he had to go night nite for it, he would then lay on the couch for a nap, he would never really go to sleep, when we were not arguing about only having it for sleepy time, i then changed it so he could only have it when he was in his bed, then he chose not to have it because he did not want to go in his bed and it was also broken because he was bitting through them every couple of weeks, eventually he stopped asking for it and didnt like it because there was no nipple part to it(he bit the top of it right off), he was 30 months old, it took some time but again i had a new baby that also had one so it was had to get rid of it befor that, but personally i would try to get rid of it befor the trip then that is one less thing you have to keep track of in the parks, i know it was tragic if my son lost his,

he was also beginning to chew gum he thought was exciting and i wouldnt let him have it if he had gum which also he chose to chew gum instead of the binky,

don't make yourself crazy over this-
my son is 23 months old and gets his binky
at bedtime & when he naps. i think they just need
a distraction at times. i plan on removing the binky
completely when my son is potty trained and moved to
a "big boy" bed. i feel that he's still a baby- and if
the binky brings him some form of comfort- so be it.