"When to Take Your Child to the Dr." Question

Updated on May 18, 2010
A.M. asks from Lake Wales, FL
24 answers

Hi Moms, I am looking for some opinions here...definitely some good advice too! I grew up with a mom that whenever I got so much as a sniffle, fever, sore throat, cut, whatever; would take me immediately to the doctor. I hated going to the dr. (especially when it was truly minor things) so much and I always promised myself that I would never do that to my children. But now that I actually have a child, I struggle with when to take him in to see the dr. when something is wrong.
I fight with myself over things like "how many days of a low grade fever do I let my son have before I take him in?" or "how many days of congestion before I have him looked at?". So I guess what I am asking is...do you these mommy-like guidelines that tell you when to take your child in? Like 3 days with fever or 4 days of stuffiness? I know it sounds silly...but again I never wanted to be that mom that took their child in for everything. Any advice or opinions are appreciated. Thanks in advance.

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S.K.

answers from Kansas City on

I would personally rather be safe than sorry. I have a hearing problem and am not able to distinguish between wheezing and upper respiratory stuff. If my child is not well for more than a day, I'm already thinking of taking them in. If fever comes back after tylenol and they have a fever the 2nd day, I'd rather take them in.

I do think the mommy radar kicks in and I probably did take all mine faster than I needed. There were so many times the doctors mis-diagnosed them and I had to take them back 2-3 times before they got it right. Children die from simple operations like getting tonsils removed and they die from simple viruses, even the chicken pox sometimes. Sometimes a child is well in the morning and dead that night. Why take the chance?

I've been a parent and caregiver for 24/25 years. I am slower about going now. But not by much.

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J.A.

answers from Sacramento on

My chidlren's dr. has an advice nurse in her office. Whenever I am not sure, I call her and see what she has to say. Often she can tell me what to do at home, and one time she said, bring him in right now. It is a tough call, but I'd rather over react then under. See if there is a nurse in your child's dr. office that you can talk to and tell about the symptoms and then they can tell you whether or not to bring in.

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T.G.

answers from St. Louis on

This is a tough one. I am not one to "over use" the doctors either. I do not take my children to the doctors when they have a cold. Stuffiness or cough can be treated over the counter and with the use of a vaporizor. Now if there is any wheezing, then I will bring them. With a fever, It is a little different. If it is a low grade fever 100.1 or under, I keep an eye on it and use motrin. If the fever lasts for more than a couple of days I call the doctor. If the fever accompanies other symptoms like pulling on the ear, coughing etc, I call the doctor for an appointment right away.

I usually keep a written log and make note of times I give medicine, how they are eating and drinking and their behavior. This helps as I have 4 kids and get forgetful sometimes. Then, if the little cough turns into something more, you have a list of whats been going on and you can bring to the doctor.

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C.R.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I am probably a little more like your mom, except I don't take my son in when he just has a stuffy/runny nose. I recently took him to the dr after 3 days with a 101-102 temp, turns out he had double ear infections. I know with my doctor's office, they don't consider it a fever until it's 100.5, and the nurses actually told me to wait 2 more days before bringing him in, but I insisted b/c he had other symptoms (not eating, not sleeping, very irritable and the fever just kept going up, not down). anyway, all that to say, I usually just go with my gut. You could definitely ask your doc for some guidelines, but ultimately you know your child the best, so if you feel like he needs to be seen, make it happen. =)

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K.D.

answers from Dallas on

Trust your gutt. Give yourself a little more credit, you know when to take him in! If your child is truly sick and something seems off, take him in. The nurse line is great, and you can always call your peds office to ask what you should do too.

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R.Y.

answers from New York on

If your baby is young, like under 3 months or even under 6 months call the doctor and check (very small babies can get dehydrated or otherwise get sick very fast). My ped is a big practice and they gave out a baby booklet with specific guidelines. Among other things it says 7-10 days for a simple cold, fever under 102 and 3-4 days with no other symptoms is fine to not come in. I do find a cold that isn't improving in 7 days or has a fever over 99 or has odd colored mucus (like greenish) is usually more than a simple cold. For my kids it is usually the beginning of an ear infection. I also try and keep my kids out of the Dr. office if they are well in the winter (since they got sick from being in the waiting room in the winter).

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R.T.

answers from Orlando on

Call the doctor any time you are starting to wonder if it's time. The nurse should speak with you and based on the symptoms and duration of them, she will tell you if you can wait or come in. The phone call is free and hassle free. (Unless it's a weekend or evening -- my doctor's office charges you for after hours calls)

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R.M.

answers from Nashville on

I also use the nurse line at my ped's office. I have called about the couple of injuries he has received- bumped heads, sprained arm, etc. I also call about regular illnesses, tell her the symptoms and she gives me an idea of what to look for and when to bring him in. Sometimes she can tell me that a stomach virus is going around right now and 15 kids have been in today with diarhea. Then I know not to worry so much. This past winter was really bad one for colds and such in my area, and my son ended up with a sinus infection. He had zero symptoms other than the horribly nasty nose (I thought I knew what "green" meant before, turns out I was wrong, THIS was green.) Since he had no fever and felt fine they gave me the guideline of 10 days with no other symptoms. Sure enough, day 10 it was completely gone. I was so glad I didn't have to take him in because strep was spreading like wildfire through the kids, and I didn't want to expose him to that. I try to avoid the doctor if at all possible, because it seems like that is where he gets sick. We just finished with all his under-2 well visits, thank goodness. If there was ever anything that just didn't feel right to me, or multiple symptoms that wouldn't go away, I would take him in. But having that nurse line is a life saver to me.

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C.M.

answers from Miami on

I think we all struggle with this one at some time or another.
If in doubt, I always call the nurse at the Dr.'s office and describe my child's symptoms. If after hearing the symptoms, they say my child should be seen, I bring them in. Otherwise, they will usually give me advice on how to treat my child's symptoms.

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D.S.

answers from Tulsa on

if its blood a band aid can't handle its probably stich time. with sniffles i jump faster to go to the doctor because I have had ear problems with both of my kids. swelling I wait 2 or 3 days to see if it goes down on its own. rashes I wait a week for low grade fever I don't worry about 102 or up its doctor time. if it looks deformed er. coughing wait about a week unless it is consistant it might be asthma if its consitant and getting worse. er. playing with ears automatic doctor. diareah that last more than 48 hours doctor. listen to your gut is the most important thing of all.

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M.C.

answers from Detroit on

I usually try to take care of my sick child for 2-3 days, and if he doesn't get better, I call the doctor's office depending on the symptoms. If it's allergies, I just continue giving him Claritin and using his vaporizer.. The other day, I thought my son had an ear infection, so I posted on this site for some home remedies. Well, they didn't help and the next day my son had a fever of 102 yesterday, so we went to see the doc. You just have to trust your gut and use your best judgment. I say, it's better to be safe than sorry. I'd rather be an overprotective mother than one who isn't.

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T.A.

answers from Tampa on

hi, i personally take my son to the dr (for colds), when he has yellow colored snot, and/or is wrestless/fussy or crying with fever/ or ear pain;( due to, he always gets an ear infection;) so, i dont really go by "how many days". i am a mom to one three year old son.

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B.V.

answers from Atlanta on

Most sickness type things clear up on their own. Fevers are your bodies way of fighting off illnesses, and are actually good for your immune system, so unless they are extremely high, they will usually clear up themselves.
Other coughing/stuffiness can take up to a week sometimes to clear up. many times, it's just observing your child - if you think something is wrong enough to require a doc visit, you should definitely listen to that. I rarely take my kids to the doctor. My oldest is 7 1/2 and I think she's gone like 3 times. Most things just go away by themselves, with lots of water, good diet, and good vitamins :)

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W.R.

answers from Gainesville on

A.,

I am in agreement with the not running-to-the-doctor-for-every-little-thing idea. I guess what I do is first assess the seriousness of the situation and go with it accordingly. For example, if my 6 year old has a fever of say 100 or more, I immediately give her Tylenol, and if it is not subsided within a reasonable amount of time, I call her doctor's office. They are great there, because I leave a message with the receptionist, and my doctor's personal nurse call's me back and we go over the situation and she makes her recommendations. If she thinks it's serious enough, we will go in for an appointment. If I am unsure, I will always call them - that is what they are there for. That's the best advise I can give. Hope it helps.

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T.F.

answers from Miami on

That's a good question and the answer will probably be different for everyone. When my first was little, I, too, would freak out over everything. My two daughters are now 3 and 5 and I'm much more laid back. I know that a fever is not a bad thing; it means the body is fighting something and, absent other symptoms, no doctor call is necessary unless it is very high or doesn't break after 2-3 days....

...well that happened last week....my daughter developed a 103 fever on Mother's Day and it lasted 3-4 days, going down to around 100 after the first 2 days. She also complained on and off of her throat hurting slightly when she swallowed. Well, on the 4th day I decided to call the doctor and brougt her in and, sure enough, the one time I wait out the fever more than usual she has strep throat! I felt horrible! At least it was a minor case and after one dose of Amoxicillin her throat felt fine and the fever broke.

Just goes to show that you never know. I would say, as a guideline, a fever that lasta more than 3-4 days deserves a doctor call. If there are other symptoms, call the docot after 2-3 days. I'm not a big fan of medicating my child unnecessarily, so I'll give Motrin for a fever and lots of fruits and veggies (and extra Juice Plus) and usually that's all they need, but not always.
Sorry for rambling. Hope this helps!

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C.O.

answers from Miami on

I used to(and sometimes still do) struggle with the same thing. Then I became educated about nutrition and natural living and have since stopped taking my kids to the doctor unless they have a persistent fever of over 102 or congestion in their chest. The last time I took my son to the pediatrician was because he was complaining of an ear infection that I had been trying to cure holistically and it was going on 1 week- the Dr. then told me that 95% of ear infections clear up on their own and do not need antibiotics- BUT because parents expect it, they prescribe antibiotics; I went home with no meds and a $100 bill!!

Since I have stopped taking them to the Dr. so much, they actually get sick less! And they are building their immune system naturally and are healthier.

Also I must say that my children eat very healthy which makes a difference- NO juice or soda, NO processed food, and we eat low cards and high protein and vegetables.

M.P.

answers from Provo on

What I like to do is if I'm even semi worried, I call the office and speak with a nurse. They then go "Hmmm. .. Better bring him in." Or not. I wish I would have done that last time my son wasn't feeling so hot. My parents just had strep (we live with them) and then he started to act sick and my parents herd me and O to the car and took me to the doctor. I was trying to tell them that an infant has a .01% chance of getting strep and he was probably teething. He was indeed teething. So always listen to YOUR gut.
With a low grade fever I would worry at 4 or 5 day's. Especially if it stays there and doesn't budge with tylanol and what not. But with congestion, that clears up with in two weeks. My doctors always tell me to wait two weeks and if I or O still has it then go in. Unless it starts inhibiting him eating. Then take him in ASAP.

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K.M.

answers from Tampa on

Dr Robert Mendelson's How to raise healthy children in spite of your doctor, I find a good guide to my questions like yours.
best,k

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R.S.

answers from Tampa on

I believe everyone has a different opinion on this so I have found that I can take in all the opinions and then do what I myself can live with.

When my daughter was born, I took her to the dr. for the same things you mom did. When she was 2 years old I lost her insurance and had to really weigh when it was important enough to take her in. That was always the question, and I found that even when I actually paid money, usually I didn't need to take her in. Fevers have been pegged as a bad thing. They are actually your body fighting off whatever infection is in your body. Over 104 degrees is definately a problem, but anything under that did my child good. So much so that at 13, she is only sick about once every year if that!! The fevers and sicknesses build up their immunity. Most dr.'s prescribe antibiotics when it is not needed for the child, it is only needed for the parent to "feel like they are doing something". Feeling powerless when it comes to our children is something we can't avoid so if we learn to deal with it when they are sick, life is a lot easier when they get older.

I know I have rambled probably more than you asked for, but in the end, I believe only 1% of the time we take our childen to the dr. they actually need to go.

One last thing, I quit giving my children any over the counter medication. The only thing they get is a smaller dose or tylenol or ibuprofen IF they are in pain. Other wise, I let them be. This also helps the body learn for itself how to fight off infections on it's own.

Good luck, it is never easy.

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

I split the difference... whenever I'm worried but on the fence I call the free nurse hotline through our local children's hosp. I give them a list of the symptoms and times... and they tell me whether to treat at home, make and appt, bring them in now, go to urgent care, or go to the ER. As well as treatment options (like what meds I should be using and their correct doseage per weight) & differentials... such as "if the fever continues for x amount longer" or "if spots appear" or x, y, z.

Just knowing that I have someone on to double check what I'm doing, is a huge weight off my mind. The service is free through most hospitals and some doctors offices... and worth it to them to be free... since it frees up clinic time for those who really need to be there, and gets patients in NOW instead of "Gosh, if you had come in last week, this would have been really easy to treat"

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A.C.

answers from Houston on

I am right there with you. My mom didn't take us for every little thing, but I was legitimately sick with sinus infections and strep throat quite a bit. I hate the thought of too many antibiotics and constantly being at the doctor with my daughter. Of course, the long bout with ear infections didn't do anything to help things...but that is the primary reason we go.

For me it is about the combination of symptoms. A low-grade fever in a child that is eating and sleeping and playing isn't so much to worry about...fever and puking and diarrhea that goes on for more than 24 hours is another story (depending on the age of the child). A runny nose is nothing...thick, yellow discharge needs to be looked at. Cold/flu symptoms that don't show some improvement after a few days or are still lingering after 7-10 days.

I've always worried that I would be the mom that DIDN'T go to the ER when I should have. But, we know our kids and you will know when he needs to go. You aren't going to miss anything big.

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

If the fever persists for 5 days than I would take him in. I would not take my child in for a stuffy nose or the like. If you want guidelines ask your doctor, he should be able to tell you when not to worry and when your child would need to be seen.

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K.J.

answers from Chicago on

You know, I struggle with the same thing, and my hubby IS a doctor (adult med) :) For me, I usually only take them in if they are actually ACTING sick--lethargy, marked change in appetite, vomiting, diarrhea, etc., or if the fever is higher than 103ish for over 48 hrs.

When I DO take them, they usually end up telling me it's a virus, or a mild ear infection, so we do not use any prescriptions and just apply loving "home care." I took my son in yesterday because he had 6 days of diarrhea, but was in a FANTASTIC mood. If the diarrhea hadn't persisted for so long I wouldn't have gotten it checked out since he was a happy boy.

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F.D.

answers from Tampa on

My opinion is that you are a mother and you have natural instincts when it comes to your child. Take your son to the Dr. when you feel you should. Getting sick is part of life, if it is something you know and feel it can be handled at home. Don't take him to the Dr. If your child is in pain, is telling you( I am not sure how old your son is) take him to the Dr. But for my best advice is, take your son to the Dr. when something is going on with him and you do not know what it is. I personally have taken my son to the Dr. every time I thought something was wrong. But that is because I am a new mother and am still learning what is ok, what is normal..etc..etc.. I hope I helped...You are his mother,m you are not gonna let anything hurt him.

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