My daughter all of a sudden started becoming self conscious this year. We were worried about her developing to early but the doctor said she's normal. She has to wear a shirt under another shirt, won't wear tank tops and has to wear leggings and a shirt under a dress. She won't wear it if the armpits are to big. She won't wear a 2 piece swim suit anymore because she says showing her belly makes her feel sad. Is this normal or should I be worried about something?
Has she said why she is sad and self conscious? Maybe she heard you ask the doctor if her development was normal (you don't say enough to know why she might feel this way)
I don't find her clothing choices that odd personally. Kids all have their own comfort levels.
If this is sudden behavior as you state it is... I would believe she has overheard someone say something about her body.
There is no reason to wear a shirt under a shirt and be as picky about clothing as she is doing right now (suddenly) without red flags going up that she has some body issues.
I would monitor her closely to make sure she is eating properly, getting good exercise and do something positive to help her with her body image. This is a problem that can be devastating to her later on.. 6 is TOO young to be like that.
If my daughter were as bad as you say your daughter is, I would have her in some sort of program which helps girls be confident within themselves.
I would be worried and I would seek the opinion of my pedi on next steps to attempt to prevent her from harming herself by starving or throwing up to lose weight.
The only time I ever felt embarrassed about my body at that age was when *other people* were commenting. Make sure that her development isn't a point of discussion and otherwise, if that's not the case, she's fine. It's okay for her to start to have preferences about what she's wearing. For what it's worth, I don't wear tank tops where my bra straps or bra (either skinny straps or large armholes) are showing, not because I'm embarrassed about my body, but because I have a sense of propriety about myself. There's nothing wrong with being aware of what makes you feel good to wear.
I would be very concerned if my 6 year old was embarrassed by her body. The concerns she should have are that her legs run fast enough to play tag and her arms throw hard enough to play ball and that showing her belly might invite the mommy or daddy tickle monster. My son is 10 and is still completely oblivious to other people's body image expectations. I think it is horribly sad that your little girl already feels bad about herself.
The pigtail pals blog http://pigtailpalsblog.com/ is a good place to start looking at how to help her.
My daughter went through a phase similar to this when she started 2nd grade. She had just turned 7 at the time. All of a sudden she would only wear large baggy tee shirts. I asked her if anyone had said anything to her about how she looked, and she said no. She just said she was uncomfortable in anything else. She wouldn't wear anything with large armpits either. This phase lasted a few months and then it stopped. She started wearing all her cute clothes and dresses again. I still don't know what caused it. But she is now confident and happy. Maybe it's just a phase. Hopefully it won't last long. Good luck!
Nothing to worry about in my opinion. No child is the same so when it comes to yours and the fact that she doesn't care to show her belly, I see no wrong in that. My daughter is 7 and I've never had her in anything that showed her stomach nor does she make the request to. But she's not at all afraid or uncomfortable to. This just may be a matter of your child's personal preference and nothing more.
Sounds normal to me.
Give it 10 years and I'm fairly sure you won't be having this problem anymore.
It depends. Is she modest and doesn't want to display her parts? Good. Has she been body-shamed and told she's fat, or is she seeing current definitions of "beauty" like size 0 models and perfect skin? Is she picking up some of the flak about breast feeding moms being so "disgusting" as to show their breasts for their intended purpose, and she's applied that to herself? Bad.
Does she have breast buds and she thinks they shouldn't show? Let her wear a shirt or camisole-type garment under her shirt. Has anyone said anything to her, or touched her? Has anyone talked about her, or someone else, as having a fat belly or being "slutty" or something else along those lines? Find out.
If she's planning to wear leggings all summer, she's going to be good and hot. But if she wants a one piece bathing suit or something with shorts instead of a bikini bottom, fine. She'll be more comfortable than the girls whose suits are riding up so their cheeks hang out or losing their tops in the waves.
Keep an eye on her - the only thing that sticks out to be is feeling "sad". Otherwise, let it go, let her find her own style, and see how it progresses. Sometimes the more we worry, the more we transmit some anxiety to our kids unconsciously.
If she is growing up in a normal lifestyle then this is not normal. If you live a modest type of lifestyle then this would be more normal.
If she is suddenly doing this then I believe something has happened to her.
