1 Year Old Very Bad Eater - Please Help

Updated on October 29, 2008
T.G. asks from Porter Ranch, CA
9 answers

My son is 13 months and has never been a good eater. He is at the 25% for weight and has always been small. Feeding time is exhausting. He barely eats. As soon as I put him in high chair he wants to get out. The only way I can make sure he eats is to follow him around the house when he is playing and feed him this way but this takes forever. This seems to be the only way he can really eat a well balance meal

Any ideas on how I can get my 1 year old to eat better.

On a good day he eats about 2 tablespoons of chicken and maybe 1 jar of baby food for lunch/dinner. I have tried giving home more real food/fruits such as pancakes, eggs etc and he spits them out. My friends both have sons the same age and they eat a lot and anything that is put in front of them. One of them was also told by her doctor not to follow baby around the house and that he should only eat in designated area to avoid bad eating habits.

Mu husband says if he is not hungry don't feed him but I am concerned about him getting enough to eat/vitamins. My doctor said my son was fine at his 1 year check up and that some babies just don't eat a lot

Am I stressing out for nothing? any help would be appreciated

Please help.

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L.H.

answers from San Diego on

I think S H said it perfectly. The only thing I can add seeing that I had this problem with my now almost 16 month old is that he was not eating because he is very independent and wanted to eat on his own like we did. I bought some toddler utemsils and worked with him for a few days and now he really enjoys using a fork, spoon, bowl and plate. He is a very good eater but because he is so active he too is in the 30th percentile for weight but 95th for height. Kids are all different thankfully so! We get to enjoy their differences and watch them grow at their own pace:) Good luck and hang in there. He will catch on when he needs to and wants to.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

You do what you need to, to feed your child. But make it peaceful.

YES, it takes time to feed a baby/child. This is a given. They will need help to eat until they are much older. Eating/meal times take time with kids. Yes, it can be frustrating. YES, MANY kids hate high-chairs. Perhaps, just let him stand on the regular chair... many kids like doing this instead. Or, get a "toddler chair" that you can put on top of your regular chair, like a booster seat.

Do NOT compare your child to other kids or Parents.
ALL kids have eating phases THROUGHOUT childhood... at every age stage, they go through this. It's normal.

Pick your battles. Don't give him food hang-ups. Encourage but don't "punish" with food.

No child is a "saint" when it comes to eating. Don't feel stress about it. They ALL get picky at some time or another. 2 years old, 3 years old, 4 and 5 and 6 and onward, you will encounter food and eating "issues." So don't burn out on it now.

If Doctor says he's fine, then fine. Unless he has true medical problems or concerns, I would not worry.

As a boy... don't give him a complex that he is "small." Many times, people expect "boys" to be bigger and huskier. Never
mind that. He will grow and fill-out as his body is ready... just keep trying to offer him variety. My Mom (Grandma) used to always comment that my son is "skinny/bony for a "Boy." I told her to just stop it... he is the way he is and he's healthy and happy. It's fine. I will not have her telling my son that he is "skinny" and live with expectations that a "boy" has to be "big" husky. Many times, boys will grow later and fill out. It's fine. Size is also genetic. My son is in the 95th percentile for height... and in the 25-50th percentile for weight, and 75th for head. The Doctor says he is perfect... better than having an overweight child, and this is his "natural" build.

A child's taste-buds are also still developing... so they "acquire" tastes or preferences. Keep that in mind.

My son is picky and "skinny", but he is healthy and tall and developing fine, and I give him Doctor prescribed vitamins (Polyvitamin drops with iron) and Pediasure. It's okay. But, he will ONLY eat if he is truly hungry and he will ask too. That is the way he is, versus my daughter will eat with no problem and she eats anything I give her.

For my son who is VERY picky, I just make sure he has food available to him throughout the day... I make a variety of bite sized and 'safe" foods for him, put it in bowls on a tray and leave it on our living room table since this is where he can reach... and as he's playing or at "meal time"... he will either help himself or sit at his toddler sized chair and eat... at will. I 'help' him and supervise him... but I don't force him. He does not do well with forcing him to eat. He also has his own rhythm in eating... he is a "grazer." He is NOT the type that eats a ton all at one sitting (unlike my daughter). So he is just different. I know his pattern. I go with it, and before I know it, he has consumed a good amount throughout the day. He grazes.

I also make healthy smoothies for my son, and soups... since he likes that. I give him a straw and he drinks (ie: eats) a lot this way.

My son is also very active, he will NOT sit continuously at the dining table. So, I don't battle about it. Many times, we also like to sit outside and eat on the patio... I've found my son eats more when we eat outside.

Yes, as your Doctor said... some kids just don't eat a lot. Just like adults, right? Some adults eat like birds and are VERY picky... same for kids.

Serving size at this age IS in terms of tablespoons. So at least your son is eating lunch and dinner. Maybe later, he will work up to more. But for now... this seems to be his pace.

Just do not compare him to your friends kids.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Our kids are always moving from one developmental phase to another and this can effect their eating, or ability to sit still while eating.

My son stopped 'sitting still' to eat just before he was one. I had to resort to whatever would work...sitting in my lap, sitting on the floor (like a picnic) or even following him around. I didn't want eating to be traumatic or frustrating, so I did whatever I could. Finally, my Mom bought him his 'own' special table and chairs set. He was not tall enough to get up and down from the chairs on his own, so I bought stools at Target in the bedding section. He would sit there and eat most of his meal, I don't know why but, I think it had to do with ownership and feeling like it was 'his' table.

Today, he still eats at his table and now that he's gained weight and is 2, if he doesn't eat we make up for it at snack or the next meal. The fun part, he sometimes invites me to sit with him at his table and it's so awesome! He will sit with the whole family for Sunday dinners (in a booster seat, no high chair), but my son's doctor told me to do whatever got my son to eat his meals on a regular schedule that didn't include chasing him around with a jar of food or whatever.

If you are really worried, I would talk to your doctor about it. Even if he says he seems okay, if you are worried I would pursue it. Don't worry about your friends, and their kids or their kids' doctors. Just let them share, and work on what YOUR little guy needs from you.

Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.M.

answers from Honolulu on

The saying is, "Food is for fun until one!" :). Why do you feel you are not feeding him enough? I believe in baby-led eating and if he's hungry and needs food, he WILL let you know. If it makes you feel any better, my son is almost 11 months old, strictly breastfed and eats NO food yet. He's extremely healthy and is also at the 20% (normal for breastfed). Here's a good website where this woman "blogs" about her experiences with natural baby methods. I like her descriptions of "Introduction to solids". It's gentle and baby-led. http://www.tribalbaby.org/ .

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K.R.

answers from San Diego on

My 13 month old just had her 1 year Dr. appt and is 10-25 percentile. Do not worry!, especially if he's been consistently small on the charts... The charts just compare to averages anyway. Your doctor seems to think he is well and that is what mine told me too. If he is healthy looking and active and all, then try to relax; it is better to be on the small side than large (considering obesity scares).

My daughter doesn't eat a lot either, and when she says "all done", we take her out of the high chair. It surprises some people that she will turn away food, including my mom, who said I and my sisters never turned down food! I would not recommend chasing your child around the house to feed him--I would think that can only lead to strange eating habits down the road. I only let her have a snack sometimes this way, but I don't follow her--she has to come to me. (not to mention that I don't have the energy to do that)

You can ask your doctor about vitamins, I think mine said we should start on those around 15 or 18 months.

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J.D.

answers from San Diego on

sounds like you have my same issue. My son is now 3 1/2 and eats a yogurt and a banana for almost a whole day. I don't understand it but everyone says he is fine. I would stop following him around. Let him eat when he is hungary. The thing I have noticed is when I stopped nagging him about eating and forcing him to eat he will eat just a little foe 2 or 3 days and on the 4th day he will eat a normal 3 meals. so maybe back off a little and save yourself the grief of fighting with him and enjoy hanging out.

Also the thing I have found helpful is limiting my sons juice to just one small glass a day. also he only gets milk w/ breakfast and then throughout the day if he wants snacks I only offer good things like cheese & crackers, yogurt, pretzels, granola bars.
I try to stay away from bad snck items. so he is forced to eat healthy foods.
My son is in the bottem 25% so I know the concern but as your son gets older you don't want to fight him so just take your time and make sure just when he is eating he is only getting good things and only on days that he eats well he gets special treats, as a cookie is a great special treat

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J.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

maybe try pediasure as a drink durring the day. also a good vitamin is great too (my daughter takes the poly vi sol (with iron since she is not on formula)). concetrate on the foods that he does eat and learn how to mix others in. babies and toddlers are suppose to eat 6 times a day 3 meals 3 snacks. i agree with not following him around to eat it does make for bad eating habbits. what i do with my daughter is put some dry cereal/crackers or whatever on a table that se can reach and say there you go. good luck!

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S.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

I agree that you shouldn't compare your child. As long as he is healthy and gaining weight steadily that is all that matters. I am sure his habits will change eventually.
I think that you should set up designated eating times. breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner. I don't know if your son is interested in juice, but I give my son the juice by V8 and Juicy juice that has a serving of fruits and vegetables (by baby doesn't know the difference). I would also consider stopping the baby food jars and give your son real food - whatever you are eating. If he eats more when you feed him (which I totally understand) then consider letting him feed himself while you spoon in pasta or yogurt or whatever.
Good Luck! and don't worry as long as your doctor isn't worried.

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A.C.

answers from Santa Barbara on

I have a soon to be 3 year old and a 19 month old. The older one is a very picky eater and will eat great one day and not so great the other. My younger one loves food, but hates to be confined to his high chair at times. So he enjoys his lunch or snacks on a child table and chair. He sits well and sometimes finishes his food. Try to give him a snack right after naptime, I notice that my little one is hungry and thirsty once he awakes. Also, Flinstones multiviatmin gummies were recommended by our pediatrician and the kids love them. I always re-try foods over and over again. My kids all time favorites are quesadillas and you can add a little shredded chicken, corn or flour tortillas with shredded cheese.

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